Anyone can be passionate, but it takes real lovers to be silly.
Rose Franken
"Damaroni!" I heard Elena calling from the bottom of the steps at the boarding house.
"Elenipoo?" We both gave each other an odd look as I got to the end of the stairs.
"Lets not..." I could feel that our faces had the same expression, as if we both drank sour milk.
"Those names were almost painful."
"I know, we are so gross." She said while taking my hand and leading me to the door. "The game already started. We are probably only going to make it for the second half."
"Woah, did you feel that?" I asked as a sudden chill went over my whole body.
"Feel what?" She said as we walked through the door.
"Nothing." I said as the feeling was suddenly gone.
We left for the school and when we got there we still walked hand-in-hand, not even caring of how it looked. Which probably wasn't the best idea, as she was still technically Stefan's. We didn't make anything official. We didn't even talk about what happened between us, we just held hands and when we were alone stole secret kisses but that's all. Nothing more and nothing less. It was just the beginning but it was all I would get, and I didn't mind one bit. Hell, I'd be happy if this was my life forever. I had the best life someone could ask for here. Or at least, all that I could ask for. Sure I didn't have a family, I only had Stefan and Elena. But Stefan and I were truly brothers here. Elena was my friend and my something more. Realistically I didn't deserve it. It was the simplest things in life to ask for, that I would never get.
The game already started as we made our way to an empty spot on the bleachers. Who would have ever thought I'd be at a football game, actually to watch the game.
"Where is Stefan?" I asked as Elena was looking around.
"He's number 12." I glanced around and finally saw him. So Stefan was a quarterback... figures. The familiar chill went over me and I did my best to distract myself. I didn't want to think about the inevitable right now.
"You know, he learned everything he knows from me." I said while trying to focus my thoughts on something else. I absentmindedly let go of Elena's hand as I tried to rub my arms, looking for some sort of heat.
"I still think you should have played in high school." She muttered with a little grin.
As the game went by I had to explain little things about what they were doing and how the points worked to Elena as she tried to keep up. I figured she would know more about football since she was a cheerleader but she was still struggling. I was watching Elena more then the game and I probably looked like a love struck fool with a giant ass grin on my face.
"Oh my god, the suspense is killing me!" I broke from my stare and looked back to the game to see what was so nerve-racking. I suddenly realized that the game was almost over and Stefan's team was losing by just a couple of points. "They only have one play left." I turned back to her to see how into the game she now was. Probably because she understood it now.
"Come on Stefan!" She yelled clearly anxious.
"You are so cute right now." I whispered in her ear. I heard a whistle blow but I just watched Elena. And then there was a huge burst of people cheering. I looked back to the game to see Stefan just scored a touchdown, having them win the game by a few points.
"They won!" She sequined and nearly jumped in my arms.
"Yea, Stefan!" I said while cheering with everyone else. And the sudden wave of sickness came over me as I realized I just cheered for my brother.
"That was so good!" She grabbed my hand, still in a good mood and then suddenly gasped while dropping me hand. "Oh my god, Damon you are freezing." She then grabbed my hand again with a tiny look of worry. She then tried to warm my hand up between hers, using the friction for heat. "Lets go back to your place so we can... heat up." She gave me a wink and I didn't need to be told twice.
The whole way back to the boarding house the constant chill didn't disappear but I wasn't freakking out as I probably should be. I just took it as a sign that the time limit I have been dreading is coming to an end. But I wasn't going to leave without saying some things to her. I needed to tell Elena how I felt, even if it was only in this world, she needed to know.
Once we finally entered the house I felt her jump up onto my back as I carried her to the stairs.
"Take me to your sleeping quarters Mr. Salvatore." We went up the stairs and I ended up flopping her down across my bed. "It was so cute how you were all proud of Stefan and 'yea, that's my little brother' tonight."
"I was not like that!" I said while laying down next to her.
"You so were. I saw it on your face."
"You're silly." I said while shaking my head and laughing.
"And you are sentimental big brother that just loves his wittle baby brother." She said in a baby voice while mocking me.
"Oh, you take that back!"
"Are you going to make me?"
"Yes." I said as a matter of fact. She gave me a daring look and then was suddenly on off the bed on the other side of the room.
"Oh really?" She said as I slowly got off the bed and walked around towards her. Right as I got near her she playfully screamed and jumped on the bed crawling over it and almost made it across before I grabbed a hold of her and threw her back down on the bed. She then unexpectedly pulled me down on top of her.
I held her arms in place and hovered above her. Her laughter faded and we both just stared at each other, the moment suddenly shifting. I don't know when the mood changed but it went from giggles to a serious moment we were both avoiding. I didn't want to put myself through this. I was trying to protect myself, because I knew how bad I wanted this. But now here I was with my lips just hovering above hers and my resolve was completely gone. I didn't even get a chance to think before her little body arched into mine and her soft lips connected with my kiss was bittersweet knowing that this was the closest to heaven I'll ever get and probably the last time I'll ever kiss Elena. I'd bet it all that this very moment, will ruin everything for me. I'll become even more bitter, because I know, I'll never have this again.
"Stop thinking so much." She placed another quick peck on my lips and leaned her head back down. "I know you want it." I did. I wanted it so bad. I wanted it more than anything in this world. I could go without breathing before I went without her. I placed my hand on her cheek and finally looked back into her eyes, which I've been avoiding.
"I want you..." I managed to get out and it sounded more like a plea for her than a statement. "I've never felt that desire burn for someone so deep, the way it does for you."
"Damon..." I could tell it was all she could manage. In this world, I didn't love her. Human me, didn't even see what was right in front of my face. Those big brown eyes just looked at me with doubt, like she didn't believe me.
"I love you Elena." I leaned down and kissed her quick and pulled away. "So much more than is good for me. And it hurts. Its hurts how much I love you."
"How does it hurt?" She whispered and looked up at me with such wide eyes.
"Cause you'll never love me back." I gasped out and felt my resolve break. It was like the small barrier that held me back finally broke and everything crashed down on me. This whole experience, everything I've managed to fuck up, and all the pain I've been hiding, it all just unloaded on me. "I'll never have you, I'll never be able to keep you cause I'm not good. I'm not good for you and my love for you takes over and makes me irrational, it isn't good for me either. I won't let you love me."
"There is no possible way, that you could stop me from loving you."
"There are ways that you can't even imagine. I do unimaginable things and I'll hurt you. I don't deserve even the allusion of you loving me."
"Hey!" She grabbed a hold of my face, forcing me to look her in the eyes. "Don't you ever think something can break what we have. Don't you ever second guess it. I love you. I love the good and I even manage to love the worst in you. And the only thing that I can ask from you, is to let me love you. That would be enough to keep me happy forever. You make me happy, don't take that away."
"I do want you to be happy." I whispered. The idea that I brought her happiness, not only pain was so foreign to me.
"Do I make you happy?" She whispered back as her hands dropped from my face, searching for my own. I simply nodded and she smiled up at me. "Let's just be happy together. That will enough, for both of us." I closed my eyes and let the single tear fall down my cheek. Her comforting helped, even when what she was saying didn't matter.
"I'm sorry that I didn't tell you sooner, how much I wanted you." I knew our time was almost over, and it was worse because in this moment I felt we grew closer. "And I'm sorry but this may be goodbye." I said as I felt the chill I've experienced worsen.
"What? I don't understand." She mumbled as I looked down at my hand and noticed my skin was slowly turning a light blue as I entwined our fingers together.
I gave her one last and final kiss when the piercing pain started to make its way into my head. It started out as a mere flicker, then it just engulfed me and I couldn't see anything but white. The thing that hurt the most was that this was the end of what we've been through. Everything we had, is over now. "Damon!" I heard a cry but the only thing I could now focus on were the colors that flashed before my eyes and constant pain. I took a deep breath and tried pushing it out of my chest till there was nothing left. I squeezed my eyes shut and cold familiar feeling wrapped around me. I blinked my eyes one last time and the last thing I could see were panicked brown eyes above me.
AN: I just wanted to say thanks for all your reviews. I can't wait for next chapter:) I already said this but I'll say it again, things will be different when Damon gets back. Don't worry.
Review:)
