A kiss from Kate, and Caroline is tamed.

Not quite.

For the last few months, time has moved in one direction. But her life has not. It is Protean and Caroline is lost. She lies in her wasted bed, center stage but alone again. Naturally? The chimes ring. She cannot stand them. Bose to the rescue. Sergei and his Paganini dull the edges.

Stare at the ceiling and conduct, arms waving with abandon. Assemble the chain of reactions. Search for the fatal flaw among the series of flaws in her odyssey for the divine Kate. Exhausting.

Begin.

On with Kate. One kiss. A second kiss, two in total.

But Caroline regresses. The clocks as witness and time moves one way. She's called it off.

"This other thing. It's just not me."

That proof proves false. But that comes later.

So -

Off with Kate. Time for Caroline to grow up again. Return to reality, put her boys first, and make a go. She does love John. Did, love John. John can be loved again. And just like Caroline, he is persistent. John is gum on the shoe. John is back. Back in the house. Back in her bed? Not quite. Back in the house, back with the boys. The family is back. Perhaps for the best. The logical conclusion, the path of least resistance. Reassemble the pieces and carry on. Kissing girls is magical but it just isn't done. It's a fling, it's a lark, it's a way to punish Celia and John and maybe – Caroline. Tantalizing.

Wait. Another change. John is out. All the way out. Caroline taps the main line and becomes – wired. Celia has disavowed sense. Followed her bliss. What's good for the mother.

Blistering sunshine and -

"Would you like to come 'round tonight, Caroline?"

There is only one answer to that question.

Meaning -

On with Kate. All the way on with Kate. On, in, over, under, Kate.

No -

Off with Kate. The last supper and someone must be crucified for the sins of the Elliott home. Caroline howls at Celia. Caroline says nasty things she does not mean, because that is Caroline's nature when mixed with Celia. Kate overhears these said nasty things. Kate reacts, equal to and opposite what Caroline wants.

But then a twist in the plot -

On with Kate. Celia in an uncharacteristic change of heart changes Kate's heart. Kate and bliss again her house. In her bed. In her life. A brand new life. Babies and wonder and shaping up to be quite like the past life, minus what hadn't worked. This is the stable reality.

This is it. This is divinity. This is the one real reality.

But Caroline still carries the weight of her prejudices and her past. All the waiting she's done does her no good. She has settled in her ways. Cannot alter the process of her reactions quickly enough.

And -

Off with Kate. All the way off. No baby for Caroline. A loss? A change in her anticipated reality, if nothing else.

On. Off. On. Off. And for fuck's sake, On. Off. Is Kate real? Were they ever real?

Even though there is no momentum, no forward progress, Caroline simply cannot keep up.

Go back to the beginning. Go back one more step in the proof. Return to the very origin to seek the source.

Before there was Kate, there was Cambridge. There was Diana. There is always the unknown that leads to the singularity. The before. Diana is the unknown. Go back, months ago, to the unknown.