Chap 8 - The First Step

"Alright man. Spill. Remus and Peter are out of the room. What's been bugging you?"

It's been one month since I arrived at Hogwarts. I was still lost on my past and on Lily. I hadn't told anyone whats been going on in my head because well, I finally just found some friends. For once people were actually talking to me.

"Dude, start talking or Ima beat the hell outta ya!"

"Sirius, don't worry. It's fine."

"Shut up and start talking."

"Kind of contradictory there aren't you?"

"You know what I mean. Seriously whats been bugging you so much? You don't pay attention in class. You get lost in thought about 30 times a day. I'm worried about you man."

"Fine. The Sorting Hat told me I had found someone... someone special."

"How special is special? Is it change you world special? or hit it quit it special?"

"Pretty sure it was world changing special."

"How did it know? You are only 11."

"Cause I saw a girl on the train. I haven't been able to stop thinking about her ever since then."

"Should have figured it was some girl."

I ran to him and put my wand on his neck my eyes blazing. "She is not just some girl!"

Sirius put his hands up in surrender, and I realized what I had just done and sat down with my face in my hands.

"See. I'm nuts."

"Nah man. The Sorting Hat is just right. Like always."

I looked up at him bewildered.

"You think I'm in love?"

"Mate you just put a wand to your friend and had the rage of 1000 suns. You are in love."

I was just shocked. Am I really in love? No it can't be. I can't do it. Not after the last time. I've been hurt way to much to try this all over again.

"You have to try," Sirius said as if he knew what was going on in my head. "Whose the girl?"

"Lily Evans," I had sighed it out but the name felt wrong for some reason.

"But she probably doesn't like me back. I mean look at me. I'm a scrawny stupid guy. There are so many guys who'd want her that are much better."

"None of them will love her as much as you do. I can see that. As for your scrawniness. We can work on that," he was smirking evilly. I was not looking forward to what was about to happen.

When Sirius left the room I said,"Lily Potter."

That felt perfect.