Finding Home 9

**Previously on Finding Home: Roland and Henry convince Regina to try one last time to bring Robin back. She is apprehensive about the whole thing. Tearing out a piece of Roland's heart is terrifying. But they go to her vault. Mal, Regina, Roland and Henry. And there, together, Regina and Roland create the potion, cut out a piece of their hearts and drop it into the cauldron...and everything goes dark**


When she wakes, it's in the softness of her own bed, alone. Mal is not there wrapped around her as she usually is, which is odd. Her head pulses, knocking hard against her skull, and she groans at the pain. Why there is pain? She doesn't… oh. The vault. The lightning bolt. The Magic. Trying to get Robin back.

Her heart clenches in her chest. She doesn't remember anything after hitting the wall. Doesn't know if the spell worked, or if Robin is here or not. If he was, surely he would be beside her right now, wouldn't he be? Holding her hand, smiling down at her, kissing the very breath out of her lungs. But he's not. The bed is cold beside her.

The thought makes her ache and a flush of tears sweep into her eyes. It must not have worked. Her last chance at bringing him back is another failure.

Curling into herself under the covers, the first tears are quiet as they fall onto the silk pillow. Her heart clearly back in her chest for the pain it radiates out is unbearable. Her throat tightens, as does her grip on the blanket over her shoulders, lungs contracting hard against every inhale she tries to pull in.

She will never see him again. That much is certain now. There is no more hope in bringing him back to her. The sobs come out louder now, escaping the anguish in her soul, and she cries, and cries and cries until her eyes run dry and her brain pulls her back down into sleep. The only place she will get to see him. The only place they can be together.

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It's fuzzy when he rolls over, his brain all muggy and scrambled as the feeling of a quilt brushes against his chest. Cracking an eye open, he finds himself in his old room. Frowning, he sits up gently, rubbing the sore spot on his torso where his heart beats heavily. He can still feel it. The knife cutting through the flesh, the pain that rocketed up his spine as he tore out a part of himself. For his dad. Where is his dad? The house is beyond quiet, not a footstep to be heard. If his father was back why wasn't he here with him? Why weren't they together, here and now, in his old room?

His eyes burn. It didn't work. They couldn't bring him back. It was all for nothing. All the hope he had now lost to the longing pain in his heart. He slumps back down into the pillow, turning onto his side and stares at the painting of the forest on the wall. Bright, happy colors that seem dull and dark now. He'd watched his dad paint it. For days with Regina and a few Merry Men. They'd spent hours in this room, making sure everything was damn perfect. But it's just a picture. One that has no life to it anymore. Nothing right now seems to have life. For years he'd prayed to find a way back home. And he has, with Regina and Henry, found his family again. But what is a family without his father there? His fingers reach out to touch the painting, over the brown hue of a tree trunk, it all just feels empty.

Shutting his eyes, the tears leak out silently, the image of his father's face the last thing he sees before sleep claims him once more.

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She doesn't know how long she slept, but the sun is high in the sky, and Maleficent is sitting beside her now, caught in a deep thought, unaware that Regina has woken up once more. She looks… sad. But it's more than that. It's pain that etches across her features as her blue eyes stare out the window. Regina had half hoped her earlier waking was simply a dream, but this look on Mal's face is anything but joyful. Her breath rattles out shakily, drawing Maleficent away from her thoughts, as she turns, watery- eyed and laces her fingers into Regina's.

"I'm sorry."

Her heart pangs sorely at the words as she curls back into her pillow, hugging it tight with Mal's hand against her chest, tugging the other woman gently to lay behind her. She goes willingly and without question. Under the covers she so hates, and wraps her limbs around Regina tightly. "I'm so sorry, Regina."

The tears fall uncontrollably once more, against the gritty dryness in her throat she chokes out a sob, curses all the Gods above for not answering her last prayer. What else does she have to do to earn their listening ears? What more can she sacrifice just to have them grant one single wish? It's unfair. There is only so much rejection from them she can take. And this will be the final time she asks them for anything.

All she wanted was for them to be together again. A family like they used to be before everything was shattered. She wanted Henry to have him back. Wanted herself to have him back. Begged to apparently no one, that Roland would get the chance to see his father again. Her heart stills at his name. Roland. And she shrinks further into Mal's embrace. Desperate to control her breathing, as she tries to find the words to ask.

"He's still asleep."

Good. At least there, he doesn't have to live this horrid realization that their hopes were all for nothing. He can stay there forever, lost in his memories of a better time.

"What can I do?"

She sniffs hard, burying her face into the pillow, "Just stay. Please."

"Always."

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The room is dark when he wakes again. Still quiet as ever, cementing the fact that his father isn't here. There isn't any laughter in the mansion. Just silence.

Sleep. He just wants to go back to sleep and pretend this was all just a dream. If he wakes up from it, maybe it will be to a better scenario. One where he walks down the stairs and finds all of them sitting around the kitchen table. He tries to focus on that, but his stomach grumbles hungrily. He knows he won't sleep if he doesn't do something about it.

Slowly, with a heavy heart, he pushes the blankets off, letting a dismal breath go as he stands, tugging on a shirt of Henry's and walks through the door and down the steps. It's dark even down here. Not a single light turned on as he makes his way into the kitchen. There is leftover lasagna from two days ago. Cold and hardened noodles, but it will have to do. He doesn't have the energy to make anything else.

"Can I heat that up for you?"

He freezes with the glass pan in hand, turning to find Regina, eyes red-rimmed and exhaustion painted across her face. They stare at each other, sad and quiet knowing for real now that this isn't a dream, their efforts didn't pay off. Shrugging his shoulders, he sets the pan down, and Regina tugs her robe around her tighter and walks over to him, avoiding the frozen food all together as she buries herself into his chest. His arms wrap around her instantly and for a moment neither of them dare to breathe. At least not until he feels the wet staining of her tears hitting his shirt. He cradles her closer, chin resting on the crown of her head as his own tears flourish and fall.

"I'm so so-sorry, Ro-land."

She shakes in his arms, gripping the grey henley tight in her hands. "I'm so so sor-ry." He holds her, crushingly tight as they cry over the loss that seems far fresher than eighteen years.

"So am I." He whispers into her hair, trembling with every syllable. At least they found each other. At least he found home, even if it's not quite ever going to be whole again. It's where he belongs. Here. With his family.

A knock at the door echoes through their dismal embrace. Regina's head turning to rest on his chest as she eyes the sound in confusion. It's late, there is no one who should be knocking at this hour. Perhaps it's Henry. She hugs Roland hard once more, brushes her tears away and moves to walk to the door.

Roland follows a step behind her, swallowing his emotion back for the time being. The knock softens out again, three gentle raps on the white oak frame as they slowly make their way over to the foyer. Regina reaching back to find the hand he automatically gives to her, squeezing it one last time before she leaves him just behind her a few steps back. Her other hand reaches for the gold doorknob. Letting one last sniff out, she turns the handle.

She freezes at the blue eyes on the other side. All the air rushing out of her lungs at the sight of the man who stands stunned as she is just beyond the threshold in the winter snow.

"Robin?"

"Hello, my love."

Her heart bursts from her chest at the sound of his voice, burning like a wildfire at the dimpled smile that beams out of his stubbled cheeks. She just stares at him. Jaw dropped and eyes wide as he moves into her space, his eyes watering as he lifts a hand to cup her cheek, thumbing away the tears that have fallen. "I missed you."

"Dad?" A shaky voice comes out from behind them, and Robin tears his gaze away from Regina's eyes that shine in disbelief. He shifts, hand still gripped in Regina's as he moves slowly around her, towards the man who stands just beyond the doorway. He is taller, thicker in stature, but his eyes, they are the exact same.

"Roland?"

His arm wraps around his son's broad shoulders, tears freely falling as he hugs his child tight. "Oh my boy."

The End.

I'll write an epilogue.