Just to be clear, Louis is an OC. Sorry I didn't mention that earlier. Thank you and I hope you enjoy this chapter.


- Chapter 9 -

And I'm Here

And I'm here just

just like I used to be

We were here in old days

with you with me

All my fears have gone

when you whisper to me

No matter how

near or far apart apart

When you feel so lonely

Have you completely erased me


In New York City, it poured down on the busy yellow taxi streets and the million pedestrians rushing to go about their day. It was lunchtime and one man found refuge in a coffee shop. He had ordered his coffee black and sat at a two people table, using the other chair for his laptop case. His laptop was out on the table and he was checking some email. Then he ventured onto the free wifi and started to read his favorite blog. Her blog.

He knew about it. She had tried to keep it a secret but he found out when she started back in her college days.

He had met Madeline Williams when she first started college. The small college mainly revolved around liberal arts and technical skills and he was a senior aiming for a fine arts degree when she was an incoming freshman. Yeah, he didn't think he would go after a freshman of all people but he did. All because she stood out from the rest of the preppy girls with lots of makeup and poorly dyed hair.

They shared everything together. Used to. Now she should be a distant memory. But he can't stop thinking about her.

He admits he did wrong. But the relationship had gone south. To him at least and he had shared a bed many times with Diana. She was charming and he just wanted another soul to talk to about his feelings. She listened to him and he even fell in love with her for a short period of time. That is, until he proposed to Madeline. Perhaps he wanted to tie her down and make sure no other man could see the purity of her soul and colors.

She was a lot of 'firsts' to him. First woman he moved in with, first person to give flowers to that wasn't on a holiday, the one girl he shared his food with even when she didn't get anything from the late night fast food run, and the first love of his life to ever walk out on him.

Louis sipped his coffee as he read the recent blog post. She had been doing well. The blog has taken off with popularity and he's sure she would get the attention of advertisers who will pay her generously.

He was happy for her.

His ringtone went off and he touched the bluetooth in his ear. "What do you want?" he asked terse into the speaker. A scoff was his answer.

"Is that anyway to answer your baby momma? Your kid wants to see you, you heartless bastard." It was Diana and he knew before he answered the phone she would be calling. After Maddie left him, full of grief and regret for letting her go, he cut off ties with Diana and she ended up being pregnant with his kid. Now he has child support to pay and joint custody. It's not a bad thing, but this woman gets on his last nerve.

"I will come see him this weekend." he said in a blunt voice making the woman on the phone growl.

"You better. How the hell am I supposed to have fun with this brat around, huh? Take him already!" Louis sighed. What a horrible mother.

"Fine, I will pick him up. Don't come crying to me again when you get a drunk emotional wreck saying you miss your baby and want him back." he said in an uncaring tone and the woman cursed at him loudly to the point he hung up on her. Louis rubbed his temple and looked at the computer screen, reading the cute username of his ex-fiancee. A deep wrenching feeling entered his gut. It's a feeling he has had plenty of times throughout the years.

Regret.

He missed Madeline.

She was the one who got away and he lives with the regret every day.

Maybe...he can try and send her an email?

He just needed someone to talk to and maybe, she can help him?

Without further ado, he looked at her 'about' page trying to find a business email. After finding one, luckily, he immediately pulled up his mail page and began his composition. He will not remain anonymous. In fact, he will tell her everything.


The Plains of Abraham. The hill overlooking the Chateau Frontenac, the main scene used in Goblin where the main characters Eun Tak, the goblin's bride, and Kim Shin, the goblin, met again is where the two friends stood at. They watched the sun touch the water and they both had wide smiles on their faces as they enjoyed the breathtaking scenery. They had finished the tour after looking at the Christmas store, the streets, the park, and all of the places Maddie could find on her phone through a blog about the locations. They even went to the hotel where Gilbert admitted it was where he was staying with his other companions and they ended up getting a nice early dinner together with Ludwig and Feliciano. From what they could see, the two boys liked Maddie and that made her happy and accepted.

The wind was blowing gently, families were walking around enjoying the weather, dogs were running on the ground below them and the end of the tour couldn't be any better. It was beautiful.

"Today was fun." Maddie said breaking the comfortable silence between them. She glanced up at his face and her heart started to race at his smile.

"I'll never forget it." Sitting down on the grass, Gilbert patted the spot next to him and she joined him, pulling her legs to her chest as she rested her head on her knees. Her eyes never left Gilbert, and he felt the lingering stare so he met her gaze, his smile growing bigger, "Whatcha lookin at?" he grinned and she chuckled.

"You, silly." she smiled small, her eyes moving to the grass. "I was lucky to have met you." she mumbled, Gilbert raising his brow as he leaned back on his arms.

"You sound like we are not going to see each other ever again. It's ruining the mood." he watched her and concern flashed across her face for a second but he caught it. Something's wrong.

"You will be going home soon." There it was. All the fun together, drinking and watching shows, rocking out to music, reading books and taking long afternoon naps under the warm sun, cracked and reality hit him. He is going to be leaving this magnificent woman who he is proud to call his friend. He wanted to continue learning about her. Watching her become more confident in herself, make herself more open to him, talk about their worries, the good, the bad, and everything in between. Soon, it will end.

He will return to make his videos, go to interviews, take pictures, and do tours. But nothing will ever be the same if Maddie was not there along for the ride.

She won't be. She lives here in the beautiful city of Quebec and he will return home to Germany, to the busy and bustling streets of Berlin.

Without her.

No laughing, no crying, no worrying. Nothing.

He's going to leave behind the best woman he's ever met.

"Hey, we can still talk to each other you know?" He looked away. But it wasn't the same. Talking through a computer screen is not the same at all.

Maddie smiled though it was tough to do so. "You have me on Instapic so we can message from there, like we have been doing." she smiled. "Your international phone won't be on when you get your regular phone back."

"Ah, you're right." he scratched his head. He did tell her that he shuts his phone that he uses abroad off when he is back in Germany to save money. "What are you going to do now? You gonna try Buzznet again?"

She ended up telling him why she was out alone on that rainy night. She had lost her opportunity to work at her dream job and he had done his best to cheer her up. Although he failed miserably at comforting her, he did get her some ice cream and they ended up having a heart to heart which came easily for the both of them. You can say, on that dreary rainy night which was supposed to be symbolic for the worst day of their lives, turned out to be the best bonding moment.

"I might, or try the local news station. Maybe they need a writer." she looked out to the water again and smiled. "I don't want to be a waitress forever. It's time to have a change of pace."

"That Russian guy will refuse." Gilbert snorted. Ivan was a character, for sure. He met the tall bastard after picking Maddie up one day from the cafe and he was intimidating like a father. The big chested woman, Katyusha he thinks, was the mother while the creepy Natalia girl was a sister. Stalkerish yandere sister. He shivered thinking about he weird siblings.

"Ah, I think he will understand." Maddie said. "Like my brother said, it's time for a change in scenery." Although her brother specified it was Gilbert who will change it for her, she had not the slightest clue on what that meant. It is like he wanted her to pack up and move with him.

She blushed at the thought. How can she do that?! She can't run away from her life and move to a foreign country and start over!

Then she paused. Oh. Her eyes downcasted and she felt hypocritical.

That's what she did when she left Louis. Packed up and moved to Canada. But that was a legitimate reason! He broke his trust and slept with another woman. That's why she left. She never wanted to see him again. She was scared. She was afraid of seeing him again and falling back into his arms, loving him with all of her heart and forgiving him for his mistakes. There was no man she was leaving behind if she moved again. Nor is there an emotional attachment to the place she currently lives at. There are no important memories here. Except…

The game. Meeting her savior, running from him, and him coming back full force into her life and making himself known to her that he wants to be friends with her and hang around her weak presence while others barely knew who she was in this giant city.

She wanted to get back into meeting guys and maybe having a chance at romance. It has been too long since she has been haunted by Louis. Meeting Gilbert, fate was giving her a rough push. Snap out of your depresion! Here's a handsome devil who will care for you and worry about you when you are sad, make you happy when you tell a bad joke and he laughs at how horrible it is, who cries with you when your favorite couple finally get together cause he was rooting for them as well.

To find the perfect guy is impossible. But she may have found the perfect guy for her.

Her eyes widened at the revelation she had while thinking about it. Then she smiled. Her brother is dumb, but she loves him. It's basically his way of saying start over with what makes her happy. The thing, or person, that makes her happy in her lonely life at the time is the German man sitting next to her. It is the reason why he said Gilbert.

"Meet Gilbert? You already know all his legal records." Maddie twitched as she talked on the phone with Alfred. It was a few days ago and Gilbert had to spend time with his family and tour the big city. She was invited but denied, giving him time alone with his brother who he abandoned the whole trip.

"But Maddie! He has to meet me or I won't approve of him dating you!" Alfred yelled in her ear, again. Like usual. Nothing brings the jolly man down, Ever. Well, except Arthur.

"We are friends Al!"

"Friends don't hang out and flirt every day!" he yelled back making his sister twitch at his foolish remark.

"For the last time, we don't flirt with each other. I am his friend!" she huffed as she pulled out her cream soda from the fridge and bumped the door with her hip, closing it.

"Aw, why do you lie to your brother? I never took you as the kind to do that." he sniffed.

How agitating, Maddie thought as she moved to the living room. "He is a friend. I told you how I met him." Though she did leave out the part where she almost died, because that's a whole can of worms she doesn't want to spill out.

"It's fate Mads. Get him a plane ticket and bring him down here." He said it with so much seriousness that it scared her a little. What is he planning?

"He has to go home soon." she said sitting down on the couch and sipping her drink.

"To Germany." he clicked his tongue. "He can make a detour for a day or two."

"I'm hanging up." she sighed and she was about to end the call when her brother stopped her by yelling incessantly at her. Which she reluctantly put her phone back to her ear, "What?"

Then she heard him laugh, "It's nice to have you back to your normal self. You aren't holding back anymore." he said and she placed her drink down, "He's good for you."

"Al…" she mumbled and then he said his quick goodbye, saying he is expecting good news from her and hung up.
Maddie stared at her phone. Her brother is so weird.

"...ddie, Maddie, yo, Earth to space cadet." a hand waved in front of her face and she blinked, snapping out of her reverie and looked at the red eyes staring at hers. "You okay?" Gilbert asked and she blushed bright. How long has she been spaced out!

"I'm sorry! I got lost in thinking and, and I am sorry!" she hid her face in embarrassment and the man only sighed, smiling at her cute act.

"You thinking about me?" He grinned sheepishly and she squeaked. Shaking her head in denial. Although he could tell she was lying. "I know, I am beyond awesome." he laughed and Maddie peered up. Her heart beating uncontrollably when his hand placed itself on her shoulder, playing a little with her long strands of blonde mess atop her head.

Gilbert Beilschmidt is her change of scenery.

This is dangerous.

Falling in love again...is impossible. So for now…It is best that they split ways. Leave each other and live their lives.

This was great while it lasted. She made an everlasting friend. But for her to be romantically involved with him.

This is the line. Her feelings cannot cross over to him.

She slowly moved her hair from his hand and stood up, the man taking it as a queue to get up as well and she looked up to him. "I'm glad I met you." Maddie smiled to him and Gilbert, of course, smiled back.

"Same to you Chickadee. My boring vacation was way more fun!" He smiled and she continued to smile, although her heart was uneasy.

"Let's go before it gets dark. I am hungry." she said and she led him down the sidewalk down the hill. Trying to keep a reasonable distance from him. But he kept closing it. Brushing her hand with his and shoulders were bumping. Making this way harder than it should to let him go. Her brother is rooting for this to work. But he is not Maddie. She needs time. She jumped too quickly into this.

He may be her change of scenery, this man that swooped in and stole her heart, but change is scary.

It's never going to happen. Or she will be heartbroken yet again and she cannot take it.

This man is perfect.

Which makes him dangerous.


It's not going to be that easy. Hope you enjoyed!

~ melody