This set of rules has been written from observation and influence of the acts and behaviors of the lieutenants of the Thirteen Court Guard Squads. They shall be held as such, no matter the situation. They shall be followed at all times and updated when deemed necessary.

Disclaimer- I do not own Bleach, but I do own the random Lieutenant Shihoin that I put in here.


The Handbook of Central 46

156) Painting on fake battle wounds and pretending to die won't get you out of your duties as a lieutenant, nor will it fool anybody. Especially if we can see the paint tubes scattered at your feet.

157) Kotetsu, no one cares about your superior l33t skills.

158) Stop using that weird language from the world of the living. There's nothing more annoying than looking through a mission report and seeing 'Zomg! That hollow fight was a major 3PIC PH4IL, since I couldn't even use my badass bankai and ish. Smh. We still kicked ass though, real talk. Soul reapers FTW!

159) The suffix -izzle, is hereby banned from Seireitei. So no Shihoin, you can't say 'Fo shizzle my nizzle where the hizzle at?'

160) The saying that you all have come with 'When in doubt, blame the alcohol' has been banned. You all know that alcohol is not the reason for why you do the things you do.

161) Once again, stop stalking Aizen-taicho. He is not apart of one of your conspiracy theories.

162) Hole punchers are to stay 500 yards away from Ichimaru-taicho at all times. We don't need a repeat of his induction ceremony.

163) Omaeda, don't encourage wild and crazy mud wrestling cat fights between Kotetsu-fukutaicho and Matsumoto-fukutaicho.

164) And stop charging those exorbitant prices at the door…

165) Cosplaying conventions shall not take place in the main courtyard. We're still trying to clean up from that fight between those blonde fox demons and avenging emo people.

166) Female lieutenants, stop exclaiming your fictional literary crushes out to the world. They do not exist here in the Seireitei so leave it be.

167) Matsumoto and Shihoin, stop trying to convince Ukitake-taicho to pose for the centerfold of 'Sexy Seireitei: Ladies' Night.

168) Kira, stop trying to auction your taicho off as a sex slave.

169)You should've already known not to stand that close to Kurotsuchi-taicho, Abarai.

170) The show from the world of the living called 'South Park' is banned from the Seireitei in every way, shape and form.


AN: I have decided to put myself on a schedule and now this story shall be updated monthly, not whenever. But I'll add something at the end of the month called 'A Creepy Guy Interlude.' Stay with me for that one :)