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Chapter 9: Getting to First and Second Base

by lightpathetic

"ABOUT THE BALL..."

Kaname looked up at Commander Souen after he'd finished signing the correspondence she'd brought for him. He recognised the tone: too subtle to be called censure but still letting him know that there was a question mark in her mind on the advisability of the action. He'd grown to tolerate it over the years as he valued her input, but for some reason he felt it was an unwarranted intrusion into his private life and became testy.

"It shouldn't concern you, Commander. Shizuka is taking care of everything."

"Sir."

Kaname leaned back in the chair in resignation and waited for her to speak.

"Sir, the recent offensive has been a success…"

"Hence the ball." Kaname stated this proudly. It would be "white tie" and everything – he wanted the best despite the trials with the suit fittings. It would be a real chance to show off everything the Monoliths were capable of. Shizuka even suggested a brief military parade and manoeuvres and some fireworks afterward. All fit for inspection by the Supreme Leader, herself. It seems Shizuka did think she would attend…

"We have extended the Monolith holdings into several surrounding countries. This base is becoming inconvenient…"

"I do not agree. I have kept all of my commitments."

"There is an estate in … that is four times the size of…"

"It's not the size, Commander…"

"Sir, if I may speak plainly."

"Go on." Kaname took up his pen so he can focus on it and not his rising irritation.

"I have it on very good authority that the Supreme Leader is scrutinizing your recent actions very carefully. Word has gotten back to Her Eminence that you are harbouring these former elites…"

"They are not a threat, Commander. I have personally assured Her Eminence of that."

"Sir, the Supreme Leader is aware that these elites can only be described as barely tolerant of you at best. Now you are throwing a ball..."

"All it is, is a formal party…"

"It's part of the excess that our people has viewed with suspicion. While our children starved, they were wearing thousands of dollars in clothes and jewellery, and dancing…"

"Spare me, Commander." Kaname stood and walked over to the window. It was nearly six o'clock but at this time of year the sun still illuminated the verdant Palace garden below him. It had been a long day in a long month he'd been away from the estate and he was not in the mood for the party line. He'd spent half that time in travelling alone, moving to and from the new Monolith holdings in the South and East, carrying out personal inspections. What Souen was suggesting about relocating made sense, especially as he'd always known that the larger Southern countries had impressive infrastructure. He'd relished the challenge and had conquered it. But, tellingly, instead of taking the spoils, he'd remained here. He'd said it was closest to home but no-one was buying it. The Supreme Leader was not buying it. He travelled home far less than he did for work purposes. He had no surviving family and his marriage did not require the usual maintenance. He'd never tried to get his wife to understand what he needed in the estate and its occupants because, if she saw its importance to him, she'd probably try to use it against him. Or worse, decide he was being derailed from the Monoliths' "vision" and confiscate it or hand his position to someone else she's found favour with. She'd as much as hinted this to him in their last conversation. He'd thought that it had been just an attempt to keep him in line but if he was being lectured by an inferior officer he gathered that she had been ordered to echo the censure he'd heard from Her Eminence herself. Kaname pressed his lips together in distaste but realised he had no choice in the matter. The Supreme Leader was stranded in the homeland trying to keep her country together and all she understood, no doubt, was that he was associating with the enemy, holding balls and was steadily being corrupted, becoming those they despised. It didn't take much to require or prepare a scapegoat for the masses. Kaname realised he needed to negotiate this matter carefully. It was clear that his "little project" – her words, not his – could cost him more than he'd ever intended.

This was so unfair. After everything he did, all he'd accomplished, he couldn't have one little thing? So many people were allowed their foibles as long as it didn't compromise their work, the vision of the Party. However, given his reluctance to move upward, to let the populace see "their" success by his revelling in it, he could see the Kiriyuus were already compromising his judgment. No doubt she noticed this as well. He should get rid of them. He should…

"Where… did you say this place was?"

"In … It is about an hour from the capital. But your convoy can do it in half that."

"It sounds suitable."

Commander Souen saw his turmoil and had some idea of the cause. She knew he'd grown attached to the estate and… to the family there. He did allude to his "home" when he was tired and he often broke security protocol to call the estate with regard to this "ball" or simply to chat with one of them about what they were doing, as if he didn't get reports. Even the rude one. He was peculiarly smitten with it, with them and it could only lead to disaster. For him as well as herself. After all, her star was hitched to his.

"You have every right to be proud of the progress we've made. We've accomplished much in a short amount of time. But this is because we've always look forward. Maybe you will be allowed to keep this estate but it will pale in comparison to what lies ahead. You'll soon wonder why you bothered with it."

Commander Souen was proud of her speech. It had always worked before. She'd been assigned to the Second Leader for almost four years now and was aware that Kaname Kuran was hungrier for progress than anyone around him. He became impatient with delays and lost ground and often insisted on accountability if this occurred. She knew the weight of the duty upon him. She'd witnessed his tears when he'd first realised that their people would finally know something better in this life, that they could be housed and fed to surplus. She believed in their cause and the Supreme Leader but more importantly to her, she believed in him. His leniency and… obsession with these "dangerous elites" had been baffling but, more importantly, it would pass. She was sure. He just needed to get away from their corruption. As such, she was surprised when he finally responded.

"I am looking forward, Commander," Kaname replied, staring ahead at nothing in particular. "I know… there is more to this life than war. We can't take over the world. We are stretched to capacity as it is with this war on two fronts and the Supreme Leader is still demanding we cross the channel to silence the posturing of that buffoon against us… At some point the costs will begin to outweigh the benefits and our people will have to be pacified with all that they have accomplished. What then? The time will come for people like me to give away to diplomats, teachers, farmers, craftsmen and engineers. Builders rather than destroyers. Isn't that why we're doing this? So our children will never have to survive by holding a gun? We have to learn how to build and honour alliances. Develop trade. That is how you earn the respect of the world. That is how all of this will last."

"Sir! They have nothing we want or we will take it! We have strength! All we needed was a fair chance! The Supreme Leader…"

"Is a blunt instrument and she knows it, Commander. She still has to figure out how to stay relevant in this new world."

"Sir?" He didn't just say something against…

"Never mind, Commander. I'm just…"

"I think you need to go 'home' and get some rest. I'll tell Her Eminence…"

"Tell her, Commander, that the ball is a part of my plan, so there is no need for concern. Once it is completed in a few days I will begin preparations to move on to …"

"Sir!"

"And that will be all you tell her."

"Yes, Sir."

KANAME marched into the household to find a single place setting at the dinner table. He did his best to hide his disappointment as he looked from it to the attendant personnel. There was no lack of people at the manor. Kaname, who tended to notice these things, realised that Shizuka had hired many more people since he'd come to live there. They were all eventually vetted, of course, even beyond the subtle grilling he'd subjected her to. Apparently they were various persons who had come looking for work, who'd at one point lived on nearby estates that had been assimilated by the Regime. Kaname did feel some concern at the added expense and lack of privacy… but realised what she was doing and decided to say nothing. To keep her happy and, perversely, he found he liked her the more for trying. They were impeccably trained and unobtrusive anyway. He hardly realised they were there, except when they were required. Hell, he even had a "gentlemen's servant", who, he had to admit, was damned convenient on occasion.

"…Imogen?"

"Sir?"

"Did I miss dinner?"

"No, Sir. The Madam and the Masters are down by the pond. They decided to take their meal with them. It's the heat, Sir."

"I see."

Kaname looked at the single place setting in the large formal dining area and instantly felt left out. He knew they would have no way of knowing he would be returning today – he never informed them of his movements, he'd say, for security reasons. Still, he disliked that they were away when he needed them. Irrational, he knew. But with his last few weeks be felt he could be a bit irrational. Especially as the thought of having to leave them – or worse - weighed heavily on his mind. He found the empty dinner placements an omen he needed to get away from.

"How long ago did they leave?"

Imogen hesitated but the question was not really for her.

"Sir! About two hours, Sir," volunteered a guard from beside one of three exits to the room.

Kaname looked at the crispy, breaded piece of stuffed chicken, bed of cooked vegetables and glass of wine and stood, feeling none of his appetite.

"Have someone bring this for me. I'm going down to the pond."

"Yes, Sir!"

IT WAS still bright out even though it was after seven o'clock in the evening. The Kiriyuus enjoyed popping down to the pond whenever they fell the heat of the day, including this close to bedtime. What made you sleep better than a nice swim in sun-heated water?

As well as the pond on the edge of the property near the tunnel there was a fairly sizeable groundwater-fed irrigation pond about fifteen minutes' walk behind the house to the east, down a slight incline. It couldn't be seen from the house because of the awkward angle, the tree cover and its situation in a rocky basin, which suited them fine as the Kiriyuus enjoyed skinny dipping on occasion. But not today. The family was enjoying a fairly competitive race that one guard was officiating over when the Second Leader arrived and caused the said guard to lose all his progress thus far on Ichiru's run.

However, about an hour later, after the race results were finalised – the Kiriyuus were noticeably grateful when the Second Leader allowed the guard – Sachin - to be at ease so he could officiate properly – they all settled around the picnic table for a late dinner by torchlight. They were a competitive bunch and didn't let a small thing like Kaname's arrival erase the good luck Shizuka was having. In fact, Kaname - once he realised it was as easy as a timed exercise of swimming out to an overhanging tree, placing or removing a T-shirt on a particular branch two metres over the water and returning to hit a rocky outcropping by Sachin's feet – couldn't resist getting undressed and giving it a go. They all thought it was disgusting how he even swam with evident competence: smoothly and quickly. And… even Ichiru found his mouth watering by the figure he cut as a drenched, barely clothed, panting and glistening virile male specimen. However, aside from the moment Sachin trembled and dropped his watch when he had to tell his commanding officer he was almost five seconds off Mrs Kiriyuu's time, they all could say they were having the best time they'd had in a long time.

"I'm not used to this environment…" Kaname began, a bit chagrined to be beaten by a woman almost twice his age in front of his men. After three attempts.

"That's nonsense, Kaname. Experience trumps youth, obviously!" Shizuka clapped, enjoying the sight of the three uncomfortable men around her.

"She's skinny. It could just be hydrodynamics," Sachin tried to offer helpfully, feeling the need to placate his boss before he was transferred to the Eastern front.

The Kiriyuus dissolved into laughter at this as Kaname coloured further in embarrassment.

"You are relieved, soldier," he muttered, waving him away from his side.

"Yes, Sachin! Thank you!" Shizuka exclaimed, getting up to kiss him on the cheek but was thwarted by a quick bow before he practically ran away up the hill. Shizuka eyed Kaname in an obvious threat.

"I had better see Sachin in the morning, Mr Kuran."

"I'll consider it, Mrs Kiriyuu."

Shizuka sat back on her seat and continued her meal. She was hungry, relaxed and enjoying the evening. It was a stark contrast to two months ago but so much had happened in the meantime.

She was ashamed of herself. She was. But… sometimes you adapted despite it all. Despite the bad situation. Especially when someone went out of their way to be kind.

They'd been working closely on the preparations. She did remember there was a war on and strove to be slightly conservative but Kaname wouldn't hear of it. Once he understood the difference between the occasions, he'd insisted on "white tie". He had people to impress. From then on he became like a little boy with a new toy, calling her often while he was away. He had a vision of what this ball would achieve and part of it seemed to be acceptance. Shizuka got the idea that Kaname was still trying to prove himself. Even to her. It was maddening sometimes. Especially as… she kept finding herself responding…

"Have you been practicing while I've been away?"

Shizuka quirked an eyebrow at his back-handed way of letting her know, in front of the guards that he had been practicing. As if they were fooled one little bit.

"Every day. Considering how completely hopeless I am."

It was Kaname's turn to give her a look of warning. He obviously knew that Shizuka was a very good dancer. She'd been teaching him before he'd left for his tour, or at least showing him the rudiments. He'd been rather disdainful of the simple way in which the elite danced… until she'd stepped to him and demonstrated a few moves. That he'd finally been allowed to touch her without her flinching soon made him gain a bit of respect for the "silly stiff pacing". That and the tango demonstration. She was in no doubt about how he felt about her afterwards.

"Good," Kaname responded, amused by the way Shizuka avoided his gaze as if she too recalled his… enthusiasm. "We'll have a look at your progress tomorrow. Then begin your tutorial on the 'fox-march'."

Ichiru nearly choked on his carrots at this, while Zero and Shizuka merely smiled and nodded. She'll correct him tomorrow, in private.

"How was your trip? It seems it was at least restful?"

Kaname knew they knew he wouldn't discuss his work but he hated it even more when they didn't acknowledge his absence. He thought of his usual vague response but then remembered what he needed to discuss. The indulgent smile left his face as he thought about how to broach it.

"Kaname?"

Kaname looked up at Zero's concerned expression then down at the hand that touched his left wrist. Had he been doing something alarming? He couldn't remember…

"Leave us."

The remaining two guards saluted and retreated up the hill followed by the wait staff, leaving Kaname alone with the Kiriyuus. They began to become nervous, Shizuka even abandoning her meal with her appetite.

"What is it?" Ichiru asked, when it seemed there would be continuing silence.

"I don't know how to say this but… I need you to hear me out."

"We're listening, Kaname," Shizuka assured, trying not to scream. Her boys eyed each other uneasily, already feeling guilty for how happy they'd been earlier. They shouldn't ever forget about the war. Or…

"I have to move further south, into … We've made significant inroads into the country and the Supreme Leader wants a new base of operations set up there."

"So you're leaving?" Shizuka asked gently, unable to take the suspense.

"I'll have to give up this place. Yes. Maybe I can still maintain it but I cannot guarantee it, as it would be difficult to justify holding onto it when I don't need it. Excess is frowned upon by the…"

"Is someone else coming here?" Ichiru quizzed urgently, not interested in the propaganda.

"No. I don't know," Kaname returned testily, not understanding why they were so matter-of-fact about his leaving. "What I want is... for you all to come with me."

"That's easy. No."

"Ichiru!" Zero chastised as his brother folded his arms and glared at the madman at the other end of the picnic table.

"Are you listening, Zero? He wants us to leave our home and go God knows where. With him…!"

"You were going to leave it anyway, in case you had forgotten," Kaname snapped, already annoyed this wasn't going well and, he'd reminded himself of this fact earlier as a point in his favour.

"That was different. It was that or our lives!"

"The choice is the same now, Ichiru. If I go…"

"Who are you kidding? All you have to do is say we're off limits!"

"Why? Why would I do that?"

"Excuse me?!" Ichiru was aghast. He'd actually been polite to this… this…

"You don't understand, obviously. Why would I justify saving you when so many of your countrymen have seen the wrong end of a firing squad?"

"What was all this if you don't care…?"

"This isn't about me, Ichiru. In case you didn't realise this; I don't want to leave. I love it here. I l… like you all. I was the one enduring the lengthy commutes to and from here to carry out my duties. I was the one justifying to the Supreme Leader why I needed to keep this place and had spared you to take care of it. But I can't anymore. I can't. I have to leave and I am asking you to come with me, not only because I like you but because it is the only way your lives will be saved. You have to be useful to me or…"

"We understand," Zero interrupted, looking pointedly at his brother.

Kaname remained silent as it seeped into the others that their lives would change. Drastically. Even Ichiru seemed affected by the import.

"It… the new location… is lovely, I'm told…" Kaname eventually offered awkwardly.

"How long?" Ichiru interrupted.

"You have until after the ball."

"That's two weeks," Shizuka observed quietly. Kaname looked over at Shizuka as she said this but her eyes were on her sons.

"Yes. I couldn't… It makes no sense for me to stay here. If I delay any further… the decision could be made for me."

"Do you mean… the Supreme Leader will come here?" Zero asked, a little too hopefully Ichiru thought.

"No. She rarely leaves the Fort. But she could give the order that my men will have to follow. One… which she thinks will remove any obstacle she perceives to our progress. Including me."

"You fucking bastard."

"Ichiru, please underst…"

"I hate you so much. Do you know how long our family's been here? How much we have sacrificed for this place? You parasites won't stop until you rob us of everything, will you?"

At this Ichiru rose and stormed up the hill to the house. The others were too struck to stop him. They were still trying to grasp it, the fact that they may have to leave the Kiriyuu estate: the carefully bred stock, the painstakingly managed farm, the recently restored house, all the people they'd tried so hard to support. It seemed as though the last months of hell had been for nothing.

To now leave everything and everyone to their fate to go with him… was practically suicide. It was over. Their lives and their legacy was over. Their only hope… was if she came...

"I'll go talk to him," Shizuka eventually said, more to escape than anything else. Kaname let them both go, only staring at the remains on his plate listlessly. What if he had to give the order to…?

"Why not just let us go? If there is nothing left…"

"Is that what you really want, Zero? To be homeless and foraging like everyone else? Or worse? I can still protect you…"

"What you wanted was a haven. The status quo. You lived whatever fantasy you needed to but now it is over. The estate is gone. There is nothing more to manage. We have tried to accommodate you. We were kind to you despite the circumstances. Why not do us the courtesy and let us…?"

"Was it so unpleasant being here with me? Is that what you're saying?"

"Of course not. This is our home. It was why you wanted us to stay in the first place. Because we knew how to take care of it. But now you are taking us away to live somewhere else, which doesn't make sense. How would you even explain to the Supreme Leader taking us with you, Kaname?"

He couldn't.

"Leave that to me. Once I follow orders the few things that make me happy are negligible in comparison."

Zero pulled his chair closer to the unbearably stoic brunette. He knew enough about the other to see the turmoil within. Despite how careful he was to try to keep them at arm's length, he did like them. Maybe enough to let them go? Zero wondered at this. He knew that he and Ichiru wanted to make some progress against the Monoliths but they'd begun to wonder about their naivety. Kaname was extremely careful, even around them. Especially around them. He divulged very little and never allowed any officer besides the guards onto the estate. And worse, he never overstepped any boundaries with them. Ichiru was beyond exasperated. Even he was unsure what use the Second Leader could be to them…

"What is it you want from us, Kaname? I can't figure it out."

Kaname looked from his plate to the hand that gently clasped his hand. They were alone. No guards snapped to attention at the possible threat to distract him from the heat of the boy's body. Kaname's eyes travelled from the lightly tanned fingers and up the length of bare arm to Zero's torso. Zero was still in his swimming trunks. Both boys had simply left the water and walked over to the picnic table as was their custom, enjoying the cooling effect of the warm breeze. He'd replaced his shirt, rolling up the sleeves a little, if only to cover the inevitable reaction of his treacherous body.

"Isn't it obvious by now? I want…"

"We'd want more than that to follow you, Kaname. At least we had our… home…"

Kaname pulled away and stood. He couldn't believe…

"So what are you saying, Zero? That you'd prefer the camps?"

"Just let us go! You move and we get lost in the relocation. Simple…!"

"No! I won't allow it."

"Why?! Why not? You can simply move on to the next family…"

"God, I can't believe… Is that what you think of me? All this. Today… meant nothing…?"

"I'm saying you can make a haven anywhere. You don't need us. Just let us…!"

"No! I'd rather…!" Kaname stopped shouting as he realised what he was about to say. Zero stood and walked to him as he lingered there speechlessly. Zero was being reasonable. Perfectly reasonable. Why did he need to take them? What was making him nuts about the thought of leaving them here?

"There is no reason not to, Kaname. So why not, between friends…?"

"What do want to hear from me, Zero? Whatever it is I will say it. I'm not good at this, saying what I feel. All I know is I can't leave you behind and still function meaningfully. Do you understand? I don't know what it is. What afflicts me but leaving you all behind is not an option. Especially as… I can't guarantee I will ever see you again. I mean, what do you take me for? I know you think I am heartless. That I have no feelings. But some part of you must understand that I would never have done any of this if that were true…"

"Kaname…"

Before Kaname realised it he was in Zero's arms. He must have been… What …? Kaname reached up to find there were tears on his face. His throat was burning. Maybe he'd been… No. He'd rather die than admit that.

But then, eventually, he realised Zero was pressed to him. His own lips were pressed into the boy's bare left shoulder and his scent, sweaty but pleasant, wafted into his nostrils. A hand was stroking his clothed back, fingers coming to knead the nape of his neck, his shoulder, his scalp with confident strokes. Kaname allowed himself to relax closing his eyes and leaning against the broad expanse of warm muscle, letting himself finally take what he'd often yearned for but told himself he couldn't have. His hands began to slide up Zero's back, almost of their own volition, as he caressed his sensitive lips along the salty, golden skin. So opportunistic. Feeling the smooth muscled contours he'd only been able to appreciate from afar. As fingernails gently raked his scalp, Kaname felt the urge to sink his teeth into the firm flesh of the youth's shoulder as his body came alive to all the possibilities…

Zero began to realise his shoulder was being kissed but made no reaction until the sensation travelled to his neck, until a soft grunt broke the rhythm of their harsh breaths and a tongue began to roughly lick his left ear. Zero finally stopped his gentle massage as he was crushed to Kaname's hard body and his lips sought his out impatiently. To devour him. Zero moaned as a tongue shoved itself past his defences and inside to explore his moist heat all while his body, his mind adjusted to the taste, to the fact that Kaname was…

Who was he kidding? As if he hadn't thought of this moment for weeks. Removing the crisp uniform and making that stiff military bearing disappear as he kissed him...

Zero slid his hands under Kaname's shirt, trailing them restlessly over his torso, then down to cup him confidently. Kaname was already hard, the moisture even allowing Zero to rub him firmly, all while his other hand reached for one pert cheek and squeezed, moaning at the thought of finally…

Kaname broke the kiss, emitting a tortured groan as his body nearly… He grabbed Zero's hands to still them, looking in confusion into the boy's fevered gaze.

"What is it?"

Kaname pushed away from Zero and walked away. He began to shove his fingers into his hair in such anguish that it made Zero follow him but…

"No! Don't… touch me."

Zero stopped and waited, watching the brunette stare out over the water still bathed in the dusky glow of late evening. It must be after nine o'clock, Zero thought as he ran his hands over his arms. It was getting cold.

"Kaname…"

"I'm sorry."

"What for?"

"For subjecting you to that. I'm usually in better control of…"

"What are you talking about, Kaname?"

"What you must think I was trying to…"

This last was interrupted as Zero had had just about enough of where this conversation was going. He walked over to Kaname and shoved his left shoulder fairly violently until he faced him. Kaname did think he'd be killed.

"You're blaming yourself for my trying to get into your pants?!"

"I wasn't mys…"

Zero cupped Kaname's face and grabbed him into another kiss. Then another. He took over, leaving Kaname in no doubt about what he wanted. He was gratified to feel rather than hear the groan of capitulation before he reached and cruelly twisted the silly little briefs he and Ichiru had dying to remove the moment he'd strip down to them earlier…

RIP!

Kaname gasped and backed away at the violence of the act but Zero followed, pulling him to him again. He wasn't a fucking child. He knew what he wanted. He knew what he was capable of taking. He pushed Kaname back against the picnic table and onto it, sweeping the dishes back as he dipped to kiss him again. Then he moved lower to kiss, lick, nibble Kaname's nipples, ribs, taut stomach, losing his mind on his taste even before he got to...

"Ooonnngghhh…" Kaname groaned loudly, his legs scoring the air as Zero's mouth closed over his achingly hard…

"Oh…!"

It was a decidedly feminine yell and then the clatter of a dropped tray. Zero wanted to ignore it but Kaname was already pushing him away and getting off the table.

"Kanam…"

"Come out. Now!" Kaname ordered hoarsely, admirably recovering the fastest, pulling his hiked shirt down over his throbbing erection.

There was a bit of suspense before the two housemaids came out from behind the tree line. One was straightening her clothing, dusting off her skirt. It was obvious she'd fallen.

"We're sorry, Sir. We were coming to clean up and Imogen lost her footing…"

"How long were you there?" Kaname demanded, evidently concerned about doing damage control. The two women seemed puzzled by the question.

"Sir?"

"That's fine, Julia. Go ahead and clean up. We were just leaving. Come on, Kaname."

"But…"

"Leave it. You're just embarrassing them and us, Kaname," Zero whispered into his ear as he passed to collect their clothing. He elucidated as he handed the brunette his clothes. "They've seen a lot more and worse. Trust me."

"But…" The last thing he wanted were witnesses.

Zero winked at Julia as he led Kaname past them and up the slope. Zero had every intention of continuing this back at the house especially as he'd had the tantalising sample of his taste before they'd been interrupted, the smooth head just hitting the back of his throat…

"I can't…"

"What?"

Kaname had pulled his hand from Zero's just as they were headed toward the house.

"I can't do this."

"Don't start that again. You and I both know there is no reason on this earth why I shouldn't finish sucking the hell out of your cock."

"Don't…" Kaname was blushing at the boy's language and he'd shared lodgings with all sorts of men.

"Why?" Zero asked, all while slowly closing in on him, waiting for just one opportunity to kiss him again.

Kaname shoved his fingers into his hair and turned away. Now that the blood was returning to his head he had a chance to think about the situation objectively. He was walking with his clothes clasped to middle as his briefs were in shreds on the shore of the pond… Fuck! They were going to see them…!

Zero swooped in, hooking his head to kiss him again but Kaname checked him, pushing him away and putting more distance between them…

"What is it? What?!"

"You were quite willing to leave me before…"

"You want to discuss that now…?!"

Kaname turned back and met Zero's eyes with such anger and hurt the youth looked away.

"I can't believe you're taking this personally…"

"How else should I take it?"

"Kaname… You have the chance to save us. You say you care. All I was saying…"

"I want you. I want you all with me. I won't leave you to God knows what…"

"Isn't that what being with you would be like? You as much as admitted your wife could remove the 'obstacles' in your life…"

"I won't let that happen…"

"You can't… guarantee that!" Zero shouted, completely losing his cool. God he was dense! And, standing there with moist, swollen lips and just a shirt on playing hard to get, a worse infraction in Zero's books.

Kaname turned away and took a deep breath. He was feeling vulnerable. He was aroused. Zero had been close to… well. He realised he was behaving like he'd ceded power to Zero's tongue – a very talented tongue, he had to admit - and not like the seasoned campaigner he was.

"Kaname. It's silly our standing out here like this…"

"I agree. I'm… going to bed."

"What?!"

"I'm exhausted. I've been travelling non-stop for a month," Kaname elucidated, thrusting his legs into his trousers.

"What about…?"

"What? This? We fuck and then I let you go out of what? Gratefulness?"

"No! We fuck because we've been circling each other for months! Because you melt when I kiss you. Because," Zero closed in and lowered his voice intimately, "you really want to feel what it's like to come out of your mind while fucking my throat. Dammit, Kaname. Do you think either of us will get any sleep tonight if you walk away from me?"

Kaname was robbed of some crucial momentum being described this way but he recovered quickly as Zero surged forward again, evidently with the intent to prove it. Kaname decided to retreat quickly, unwilling to take the risk.

"Kaname!" Zero cried, desperately disappointed to have grabbed air instead of the sexily blushing brunette and feeling more than silly to be chasing him about on the lawn like this but unable to stop himself. "Come here and let me kiss me you...!"

"No! Stay away from me. I'm not interested… in whatever you think this is. You have a decision to make."

"Are you kidding?! You think being able to fuck you is a bargaining position?"

"I think… I am not doing this if there is no future."

"You're insane if you think I'm gonna reconsider getting my family out of harm's way because of a bit of tail…"

"Then," Kaname returned, a smug twist to his lips as his eyes slowly lowered to the juncture of Zero's thighs. "Your decision will be easy. Good night."

KANAME walked resolutely away from Zero and toward the house. His calm demeanour belying the tumult inside of him at this crazy evening. He'd kissed Zero. Kissed him! They'd almost… Oh God…

Kaname reached his room and closed the door behind him and leant on it, all before sinking to the floor like a swooning damsel. He was still hard. His dick still burned from the brief taste Zero had taken. What was he doing walking away? Why? He'd finally be able to sleep without the odd yearning that always assailed him in the dark, knowing they were only a few doors away. They were all a few doors away.

Kaname closed his eyes and hit the door behind him with his head. It was only Zero's calm acceptance, his unabashed desire and comfort, that had made Kaname even begin to cope with having failed himself so miserably. He was unused to not fighting himself, to ceding control to such wanton desire. Yet there he was using himself as a bribe. Kaname hit his head on the door again. What had possessed him? It had to be more than the sense that it would work? More than the boy's flushed visage, dilated eyes and obvious need…

But what was really depraved, what was really crazy, was that he had been looking forward to holding Shizuka in his arms again. To seeing her smile, the scent of her hair. That had been the plan he'd allowed himself to plot. Doing everything in his power to make her see him with something better that revulsion. He'd wanted to win her over. Win her. And he knew he could. He'd known since the time she'd stayed in his arms that much longer after realising he wanted her, the subtle caress, testing the muscles of his shoulders and arms before… she excused herself. He'd left this place with the scent of victory in his nostrils. What had happened? Knowing what was possible with Zero had suddenly made it all so confusing!

Kaname eventually came to think that his being on the floor like this was beneath him and pushed himself to his feet. The world hadn't ended. He'd allowed himself to sink his teeth into the muscles of Zero's shoulder and, aside from his body thrumming with delicious sensation at his prize, pressed as it was against Zero's thigh… there had been no consequences. He was still here. He was still thinking about the raid on those rebels in …, still planning a request for personnel for his Intelligence Division, still plotting the next set of offensives to the East. What did change… was how wonderful he felt. How desirable. How… accepted. It was just that his personal life was suddenly careering violently off course. That's all.

Fuck.

Kaname put his shower to good use, sinking his teeth into the crook of his elbow, muffling the strained groan as he came hard onto the white marble of the cubicle, pretending he was back on the shore and Zero had finished what he'd started. Next he prepared for bed and the day tomorrow. He would see them all in the morning. No doubt the night's occurrences would be discussed amongst themselves and they would reach a decision. The right decision.

This meant… he should resign himself to losing all progress with Shizuka, knowing, with what he'd done, to her son, any woman would… not understand. But he loathed to do so. His feelings for her hadn't changed. The way he saw it, he had two sides. They were both equally a part of him. He understood what he needed from both and usually nurtured, was content with the "normal" one… but the other side sometimes made itself hard to ignore, despite his control. Like when it made him do all he could to make the Kiriyuus stay with him, knowing he shouldn't. He'd thought just seeing them would be enough. Just having them would be enough. But that side wasn't content with just that, apparently. Not anymore. Especially, not since Zero's kiss. And he'd already been dealing with an ugly, irrational jealousy of this "Kaien Cross" person.

With his head somewhat clearer he did realise all he'd done was place himself on the bargaining table in a way that could make him vulnerable to them, despite how careful he'd been before. He suspected they would try to use his… particular need for them, to their advantage. He wondered briefly about their trying to blackmail him but discarded the possibility. They were too smart for that. It would be something else they'd want, no doubt. Definitely the estate. Maybe that was it…

Kaname again began to think of the way Zero had taken him over, pushing him onto the picnic table and… shivered deliciously. He decided, maybe, their "taking advantage" of him would not necessarily be a bad thing.

He was definitely looking forward to it.

to be continued

lightpathetic wrote this but these are not my characters. They belong to Vampire Knight.