A/N:
Disclaimer: Only my overactive imagination belongs to me!
--
"Kelli, why don't you go see who's at the door?" I call from the master bedroom of our hotel room.
"Okay, Mom," I look out into the living room as she slides off the couch and runs for the door. "Who is it?" she calls, dragging a chair to the door.
"It's Dad," I hear Elliot say from the other side. Kelli climbs up on the chair and looks through the peephole.
"It's Daddy!" she calls back to me.
"Well let him in!" I laugh.
She drags the chair back away from the door and flips the lock to open the door and let Elliot in.
"Hi Kelli," he says.
"Hi Daddy!" she replies, reaching up to wrap her arms around his waist. He reaches down and picks her up, walking into the bedroom.
"How's my girl?" he asks her, kissing my cheek.
"I'm good. Mom says maybe you'll want to go to Chuck E. Cheese! I've only been one time in my whole life, Daddy. Please?" she begs, as if six years is far too long to go with only one trip to the pukiest place on earth.
Elliot raises an eyebrow at me. "Oh your mom knows how I love that overgrown rat," he mutters at me.
I smile innocently at him. "I know," I say.
"So can we GO?!" Kelli asks.
"Of course," Elliot replies. He's always been a sucker for his daughters. I'm not surprised to see that this one is no different.
"Mom! Let's go," my daughter implores.
"Okay, okay!" I laugh, sliding my feet into my slip on sneakers and heading for the door, Elliot right on my heels, Kelli still securely in his arms.
--
The whole drive to the pizza place, I'm sneaking glances over at Elliot. He finally catches me and asks me what I'm staring at with a smile. I blush and shake my head. "I just can't believe we're really here," I say.
"You are," he replies, reaching over to take my hand. "And I want to talk to you more about how long you might be staying," he says, seriously.
"Elliot," I begin.
"Not right now," he interrupts. "But we do have to talk about it eventually, Liv. I need to be with my daughter. We have a lot of lost time to make up for."
"I know," I whisper guiltily.
"We can talk about it later. Let's just have some fun with our kid tonight, okay?" he says with a smile.
"Okay," I nod and fake a smile.
I feel a thud in the pit of my stomach. The other shoe just dropped.
--
I giggled for about the millionth time as Kelli mugged a silly face for her dad who was snapping pictures of her climbing all over the jungle gym at Chuck E. Cheese.
Elliot slides into the booth across from me, a bright smile on his face. "I forgot what it was like to have one this little," he says.
"She's a handful sometimes, El. It's not always like this," I remind him.
He nods. "I know. I did raise 4 other fairly normal children," he says defensively.
"I'm not trying to start a fight, Elliot. I'm just saying."
"You've been on edge all night, Liv. What's up?" he asks.
I shrug. "Nothing."
"Olivia. Seriously. You can't lie to me and you know it. What's going on?"
"I… what do you expect to happen, exactly, Elliot? We just move back here and become one big happy family?"
Elliot straightens his shoulders in a way I've come to know means I'm in for a fight. "Well as nice as that would be, Olivia," he says sarcastically, "I'm not expecting the pieces to just fall into place, no."
"Elliot, I'm not trying to be a bitch, I promise. I just need to know what you expect."
"I expect to get to see my daughter, Liv!" he's getting exasperated with me.
"And I have no intention of keeping you from her. But we don't exactly need to move back to New York."
"What do you mean you don't need to come back here?" he asks.
"Exactly what I said, Elliot. You can visit whenever you want. I agree, it is important for you to see Kelli. But they do have airplanes, now. And believe it or not, Montana has airports."
"She needs her Dad in her life, Liv. Every day, not when my work schedule allows."
"Elliot, we've done fine without you for six years. We'll be fine now."
"LIKE I HAD ANY CHOICE ABOUT THAT!"
"Elliot, calm down."
"Mommy?" Kelli comes over to the table, rubbing her little fist over her eyes.
"What, princess?" I ask, trying to keep my voice from cracking from the tears that are about to overflow.
"I'm sleepy," she says.
"Okay. Let's go back to the hotel, hmm?" I ask, picking her up and putting her on my hip.
She pushes back from me and holds her arms out to Elliot. "Daddy can you carry me?"
"Sure, honey," Elliot says, taking her out of my arms. I give him a look that I hope conveys my message.
Don't think that means this discussion is over. Because it's not. By a long shot.
--
Half an hour later, after a car ride of complete silence save for the tiny baby snores coming from the back seat, we're back at the hotel. Elliot picks Kelli up and we head inside to the elevator. The ride up to the room is complete silence, just like it had been the day before, only for different reasons this time. I don't… I don't know what to do. I really am in love with Elliot. I feel like I could move back here in a heartbeat, but I just can't see the benefit of taking Kelli away from everything she's familiar with. Still, he's right. It would be nice for her to be able to see him every day and get to know him. Augh! What am I supposed to do?
We enter the hotel room, Kelli out like a light, draped across her daddy's chest, her face snuggled into his neck. He takes her into the bedroom and pulls off her little shoes, dropping them on the floor next to the bed. I grab a nightgown out of her suitcase as Elliot pulls off her jeans and tee shirt. I hand him the nightgown and he slips it over her head, pushing her arms through the sleeves. Amazingly, she sleeps through the whole thing. He looks up at me. "Socks on or off?" he asks.
"Off. She'll take them off in her sleep anyway," I respond automatically.
"Strips in her sleep, huh? Sounds like someone else I know," he teases.
I crack a small smile. "Yeah, well."
He bends down and pulls the comforter up to her chin, kissing her forehead. I tuck the covers in around her. "Snug as a bug in a rug," I say, kissing her cheek. We walk to the door and I start to pull it almost all the way shut, so she can still see a sliver of light from the living room. "Love you, Kelli," I whisper to her sleeping form.
"Love you Momma," she whispers back. "Love you Daddy."
I roll my eyes. "Goodnight, Kelli Serena. You faker."
She giggles softly.
"Love you Kellibean," Elliot says quietly, his hand resting on top of mine on the doorknob.
"Thanks for letting me do that," he says once we're seated in the living room.
I nod. "Elliot, it isn't my goal to keep you from doing daddy daughter stuff with her. Even though I'm sure that's what it seems like I'm doing," I finish quietly.
"Well… it… Olivia, why didn't you tell me about her?"
"I don't know," I whisper, and honestly, I have forgotten. They're so natural together; I have no idea why I was even the slightest bit worried. Maybe I was scared for me, but in hindsight I have no idea why. I loved Elliot Stabler with every fiber of my being. Why would I let him go? "You left," I whisper. Oh yeah. That.
"Liv. Lizzie and Richard were still in high school. They… needed me."
"You could have come back. They've been in college for four years."
"By that time…" he trails off.
"It was just too hard?" I ask.
He nods. "I guess. Yeah. I guess you're right."
"Now you know how I feel. Montana is home for us. It's all Kelli's ever known. Like how New York is home for you."
He sighs, putting his head in his hands. "I didn't… when she was missing… I didn't think this would be so hard. Two days ago, I didn't know she existed. And you… you were like this great memory I had. The happiest memory," he looks up at me and smiles. "And now you're both here… and I don't want to miss any more time… with either of you."
I smile, thinking about how he always knows just what to say to get to me. "So what do we do?" I ask. "I don't want to come rushing back out here, and do you honestly think you could be happy in small-town Montana?" I played the card that I knew would win me the hand. He'd been miserable in Jackson the whole two years we'd been there. He'd always whined about how there wasn't enough to do. "Seriously, Elliot. You would have come back, I know you would. But you hated Montana more than you loved me."
His face falls. "I guess I always hoped that you loved New York as much as you loved me and that you'd come back."
"I did, Elliot. But you leaving and not coming back… it left a pretty clear message in my mind."
He nods. "I can see your point, I guess. So… what about a trial? The rest of the semester in Montana, and then you guys come here. Kelli goes to school out here and we leave it up to her. Let her decide which she likes better and that's where we'll land."
I grin at him. "Ever let a six-year-old make a life decision for you?"
He laughs. "Judging by the smile on your face I'd say not as often as you have."
I nod. "I left it up to her whether or not we would come out here."
"You're the mom. You have the final decision. I'm glad you made the one you did," he says, covering my hand softly. I sit there for a moment, trying to decide if I think his proposition is worth agreeing to or not. Time slows to a crawl as his fingers trace over the back of my hand and he bores holes into me with those big blue eyes.
"C'mon, Livvie," he pleads.
"I hate when you call me Livvie."
"Only because you can't resist me," he says with a mile-wide grin.
I roll my eyes. Dammit. It's so true. "Fine," I concede. His smile brightens (if that's even possible at this point) as he pulls me into his arms.
"So. What about us?" he asks.
I roll my eyes. "One relationship at a time, Stabler. Let's just let "us" happen how it happens, and you work on getting to know your daughter, okay?" I smile.
"You aren't any fun anymore, you know that?" he teases.
"I know. I'm sorry. I'm a mom. We're the un-funnest ever," I smile.
"Seriously though, how long are you guys going to stay before you head back? How long does Kelli have off from school?"
"We'll probably stay until after John's trial. Then we'll go back. She's got another two days off from school, but it won't be that hard to get a couple more."
Elliot nods. "Well, I guess. I better get back to the house…" he trails off, hinting heavily that he'd like an invitation to stay, but I know if I don't issue one, he'll go.
"Do you want to stay?" I ask with an eye roll.
"Jeez, Liv. Don't sound so excited."
"Please, Elliot. Please stay," I deadpan.
"Well if you insist," he smiles.
--
A/N: Hmmm. I wonder what the next chapter is going to be? R&R! XO, Kinsey Jo
