Slamming her bedroom door shut she chucked herself at the bed, silent tears beginning to crawl down her cheeks as she clenched her fists.
She'd been laid there for what seemed like hours before the gentle click of the door closing alerted her to the others presence.

"Shizuma…"

"Go away"

"Shizuma…" a hand gently rested on her shoulder whilst another began to rub circles into her lower back. "He did all he can Shizuma, they can't find her."

"No, someone can find her. Someone must know where she is! Useless detective, I'll just hire another one."

"Shizuma…"

"No! I will find her!" With that she jumped up off the bed and began to run for the door in a desperate attempt to find her phone and further the investigation.
A hand grabbing hold of her wrist stopped her, dragging her back towards the bed.

"You've got to face the facts Shizuma; you aren't going to find her. Even if you do, she's probably moved on. You need to move on as well…"

"No, No, No!" The tears tumbled down her face freely now as she began to shake her head frantically trying to prove her point. "I need her…"

"What about us?" The voice rose slightly. "I need you!" With that a pair of lips crashed against her own as a body pinned her to the bed.

"Stop it! How dare yo-"

"Shizuma! You promised, I need someone to have my child, you know that. My family will disown me if I don't."

Shizuma pushed the man off from atop of her and moved to the other side of the bed, trying to distance the pair.

"Just tell them the truth Daisuke, you're gay."

"You know I can't do that, they'll disown me. At least if I have a child they might…"

"Might what? Love you regardless of your sexuality? They should love you anyway, child or not!" She snapped, irritation taking a hold.

"You can't exactly speak; this marriage is as much of a cover for you as it is for me."

"It was… but I'm fed up lying, I don't need to lie anymore and neither do you!"


A week had passed since Nagisa had told Shizuma to leave and she hadn't heard so much as a squeak from the silver haired goddess she was so enraptured with.

"I guess she finally got the message then" She muttered bitterly, a part of her wishing the elder woman hadn't given up so easily.
'Guess I didn't matter after all… I should probably move on…'

"Nagisa…" The tentative voice drew her back from the pit of self-pity and loathing she now found herself nearly constantly situated in.

"You need to eat something…"

Rolling her eyes she rolled over in bed to face her concerned friend, observing her quietly. She'd been there when Shizuma had left, comforted the crying red head. Then the next thing she remembered her friend's clothes and bags were within the apartment. 'She must have gone back to the hotel whilst I was asleep'

"I'm not hungry" She grumbled before dragging a pillow over her face, attempting to hide from the disapproving eyes she knew would be trained on her every movement.

"Nagisa…"

"Tamao-Chan, please. Don't push me."

An exasperated sigh echoed through the red heads mind whilst she cringed at the pathetic excuse she'd just offered one of her oldest friends.

"I'm just worried about you…"

"Don't be."

She knew she was being harsh to the bluenette but she didn't want to eat at the moment, every time food was mentioned her stomach began to churn.
She was tired, every time she closed her eyes images of the elder woman plagued her mind whilst sleep eluded her.

Stifling a yawn she finally pulled away the pillow and let her gaze return to the worried friend stood at the foot of her bed.
Her eyes were underlined with the ever present knowledge that she wasn't sleeping as she took in the bluenette's stance, then as if on cue her stomach let out a frustrated grumble startling both participants in the room.

"You need to eat, this isn't good for you."

"I don't care." She knew she was being childish in sulking but couldn't bring herself to accept the inevitable; life felt like it was collapsing around her, like she couldn't continue. Yet the reality of the situation was that with time it would get better; the crippling pain would return once more to a dull ache and life would go on. She didn't want to admit that she would once again have to return to a life without the woman she had never truly gotten over.

"Don't say that. Don't you dare say that!"

The sharp impending tone cut through her self-pity like a knife as she visibly flinched; knocking down the walls of bitterness and loathing she built to disguise her pain and vulnerability.
Not once had she expected her friend to speak to her like that and as she raised her face to look at Tamao's pain stricken one, she couldn't hold back the tears any longer.

Guilt washed over her accompanied quite quickly by humiliation, embarrassment and straight out heart ache.

"I'm sorry." She all but mumbled as her breathing became short pants throughout her sobs.
"I'm just… I'm so tired of this, of all of this." She added barely above a whisper.

"I know" with that her friend closed the distance between them and enveloped the red head in a tight embrace, letting her sob into the bluenette's shoulder as her heart took over for her brain.

They sat there for what felt like an age before Nagisa finally began to pull back, observing Tamao's own tear stained face whilst she rubbed at her swollen eyes.
"Thank you…" she croaked out, her voice was crass and scratchy from the crying.

"What for?"

"For this. For everything. For being here for me when I needed you the most."

"Any time."

For the first time since Shizuma had left the red head allowed herself smile, sure it was only a small quirk of the lips, and the pain still coursed through her veins like an unstoppable poison, but it was a start.

"However, don't think that's gotten you off the hook. You still have to eat something."

Smiles were exchanged once more before the bluenette had disappeared back out of the room, reappearing moments later with a bowl of soup.


Note:

Okay, so this is a really short chapter I know that. D: It's sort of a filler though, just a small insight into how Nagisa is dealing with the situation whilst Shizuma gives her some space.
Little does Nagisa know, but Shizuma is up to something.
This is just a quick update before I start back at college and the madness regarding assignments and placement begins again. Next chapter Shizuma's plans are put into action, another secret is revealed and – well you'll just have to wait and see. :P

Thank you to the amazing people who reviewed my last chapter, and anyone who's read 'Looking Towards Tomorrow'. I don't own Strawberry Panic – Again that should be pretty obvious. ;D

Becky. xx