Disclaimer: I don't own DA:O or any of its characters.

A/N: I owe my readers a couple of apologies concerning the last chapter. First and foremost, I apologize for not posting a warning about the love scene between Clarissa and Leliana. It wasn't until a reviewer posted about it that I realized my mistake. Secondly, apologies for my slip regarding the litany. In my zeal to post a new chapter, I had accidentally written that Clarissa was reciting the litany. Obviously that's not possible if she's mute. I went back and edited, but for those that read before the edit, my sincerest apologies. Thanks to klarabella for pointing it out.


9. Morrigan, Alistair & Clarissa

Mother had said that this would not be an easy task. It was proving to be all the more difficult since the arrival of the meddlesome Chantry twit. I had fully expected the templar to confess that he had discovered Clarissa's true identity, especially since I was the one to advise against it. Twas a surprise indeed when he heeded my so-called advice and kept his knowledge under wraps. Perhaps another course of action is in order.

I watch them from my campsite. The bard is plucking at her lute, singing about the Chant of Light or some other ridiculous Chantry tripe. The templar is watching Clarissa, his gaze never faltering. Clarissa reads by the fire, her nose buried in a book that she had retrieved in the Tower. I am tempted to approach her and convince her to confess to Alistair, but I know this will only raise her suspicions. No, it would be best if he 'found out' by accident, despite his already knowing. I mull over several possible scenarios. So deep am I in thought that I don't notice Clarissa's approach until she is standing right in front of me.

"What comes, my friend?" I ask pleasantly enough. She smiles widely and places the book she'd been reading into my hands. I recognize it immediately. "What, you found Flemeth's Grimoire?" I am astounded. How did she know to look for it? I did not have a chance to tell her to keep an eye out for it while she was at the Circle of Magi.

"Do you think you can use it?" she asks after casting a glance over her shoulder, ensuring that no one is within earshot.

"I can certainly try. I will not squander this opportunity. I will let you know what I find," I reply.

"Good," she tilts her head to one side. "I wasn't sure what it was at first, that's why I was looking through it. Don't worry though, it made no sense to me. I only knew that you would want it because she had marked her name down several times. Otherwise I wouldn't have known to give it to you."

"Thank you," I say sincerely. She takes a step forward, then seems to think better of it and simply nods in reply.

"No problem. I'll be by the lake in case you need me. I need to think some things over," she says.

I watch her disappear into the brush surrounding our camp. I occupy myself by making several health poultices. It isn't long before I see the templar move in the direction that Clarissa had headed. Perhaps he has mustered the courage to confront her after all. If not, I can always put my plan into action. Either way, the truth will be revealed very shortly.


When I approach her, she's gazing up at the sky. Her back is pressed up against a large conifer, one knee pulled up to her chest. She seems to be lost in thought. I wonder if she's thinking about her family. I feel guilty about disturbing her when she obviously wants to be alone, but these opportunities to be together alone are so rare.

"Hi," I say tentatively. "I'm sorry to bother you…" I'm standing over her, and she glances up at me, her expression surprisingly serene. She smiles, patting the ground next to her. I sit down. Her desire is my command, after all. "I wanted to talk to you about what happened at Redcliffe." She tilts her head. "I just need to say thank you. You saved the Arl's family, even though it would have been easier to sacrifice Isolde, or slay Connor…I owe the Arl a lot, and the fact that we were able to spare his family…I just really appreciate everything you've done." She turns her gaze back to the stars, her fingers lacing around her knee. I watch her for a time out of the corner of my eye. The silence that has settled upon us is strangely comforting. Which is why I'm surprised when she breaks it. Well, sort of. She reaches into one of her pockets and extracts an amulet. She presses it into my hand.

"This…this was my mother's amulet. But why isn't it broken? Where did you find it?" I ask. She points in the direction of Redcliffe castle. "The Arl's castle? But why…" She gives me a knowing smile. "I guess he kept it this whole time. I'll have to ask him if – when he gets better. Did you remember me telling you about it? Wow. I'm used to people not paying attention when I talk about things." She loops an arm around my shoulders, squeezing me to her gently. "Is this where we break into dance? Because I'm game. Where's the minstrels?" She slaps my leg playfully and that's when it hits me. I look into her eyes, and I realize that I've completely fallen for this woman. Her cheeks turn an attractive shade of pink and she quickly glances away. I wonder if she could ever feel the same way about me. I know that she and Leliana have some sort of relationship. She had also mentioned that she had been involved with an elven girl before her family had been killed. Perhaps men don't interest her…But I swear I've caught her staring at me when she thinks I'm not looking. Andraste's blood, women are confusing!


"Wait, don't kill him," Leliana orders. I give her a look. We'd been travelling for quite some time, on our way to the Brecilian forest, when a group of bandits had attacked us out of nowhere. "These are no ordinary bandits," she explains. She turns to the man who appears to be the lead bandit. "You know what I'm talking about, don't you?"

"We were told to take care of the little red-headed girl, that's all," the man chokes out. My heart speeds up to a sickening pace. They were hunting for a red haired girl? Could Howe have possibly discovered my existence? "I don't know who hired us, but we were told to look for a red-headed Orlesian girl." I feel a pang of guilt at the relief that flows through me. They were searching for Leliana.

"Me? Why are you looking for me?" she asks, clearly shocked.

"I don't rightly know," the man replies. "But I can tell you where we were supposed to go once we finished the job." He tells us about the contact in Denerim. We let him go, even though I'm quite tempted to kick the guy repeatedly in the teeth. Leliana pulls me away from the group.

"It's Marjolaine, it has to be," she murmurs.

"Why now?" I whisper.

"Maybe she found out that I'm here. I would like to go to this contact if we are ever in Denerim. Would that be possible?" she asks. I nod and we head back to the group. Looks like we'll need to make a brief stopover in Denerim.


It had taken everything in my power not to pounce on Goldanna and cut out her tongue. The nerve of her, blaming Alistair for his mother's death! I can understand her being bitter about living a life of poverty, but it's not like Alistair had it easy. I clench my fists. Open and shut. Open and shut. He tries to explain himself, he apologizes profusely. She makes another scathing remark. He's crestfallen. My fists clench. Open and shut. Open and shut. We leave the house, and he's understandably upset.

"That's the family I've been looking for? That shrew of a woman is my sister?" he shakes his head. "That's not what I expected, to put it lightly. I guess I thought that she'd welcome me with open arms, I don't know. I suppose that's silly, isn't it?"

What do I tell him? I want to be kind and supportive, but I also feel like he needs to understand that there are cruel people in this world. I take out my trusty quill and vellum and write out my thoughts in one simple sentence.

Everyone is out for themselves, you should learn that.

"I guess you're right. Anyways, thanks for being there for me. It means a lot, even if she was a complete and utter bitch," he frowns. I pat his shoulder reassuringly. I almost don't see the knight stalking towards us. His jaw is set, and he's reaching for his dagger. My eyes widen and Alistair turns to see what has caught my attention. It's too late. The knight buries the dagger into Alistair's chest all the way to the hilt. I scream out his name as he falls to my knees.