AUTHORS NOTE – thanks for all the reviews. Please keep them coming as I don't want to have to demand them again.
Beneath the water
that's falling from my eyes
lays a soul I've left behind
the edge of sorrow was reached but now I'm fine
I've filled the hole I had inside
I'll pray it doesn't scream my name
so I light a flame and let it breathe
the air that kills the shame
I'm up
I'm down
like a rollercoaster racing through my life
I've erased the past again
The Past - Sevendust
I don't breathe properly until I'm pulling back into the garage, as I do I see Aunt Gemma staring at me her hands on her hips and I know I'm about to get a right grilling. As I park my bike I think of what lie to tell. As I pull off my helmet placing it on my mirror Aunt Gemma walks over.
"I know I gave you the day off but that doesn't mean you can run off and not tell anyone where you are" she berates
"Sorry" I smile "I went to look at some houses as I talked to my boss and it doesn't look like he's going to need me any time soon"
"Oh okay" she nods "Any luck"
"Not really no" I sigh climbing off my bike to stand next to her
"Well why don't I help you tomorrow" She suggests
"Yeah okay" I nod
I begin heading to the clubhouse but stop as her voice rings out again, I turn to look at her
"The guys are heading back" She calls
"That's early" I reply
"Yeah something went wrong"
I nod and carry on walking towards the clubhouse trying to keep my breathing regular, once in the safety of my room I let out a big breathe and look down at my trembling hands and head straight to the bathroom to get a shower. I turn off the hot water and begin pulling off my clothes, cursing as I see my top has blood splatter on it.
"I liked that one too" I pout but hide it at the bottom of my hamper with a mental note to burn it in the morning.
I finish stripping myself of my clothes, noticing that my jeans have blood on them too and wonder how the hell Aunt Gemma didn't notice and place them with my shirt. I step under the warm spray of the water and let my tense muscles relax.
Today was a day I don't really want to live again, I mean twice I was nearly caught by the sons and no matter how good I can lie my dad would have seen right through me and it wouldn't have taken them long to figure out I'd killed that man, hell I killed him in my signature way so only a fool wouldn't know it was me.
It was times like this when the guilt set so deep into my bones I felt like I'd aged five years in five minutes, plenty a time I had to catch myself from spilling my guts to my dad or Happy. Catch myself from telling them that not only had I betrayed them by joining their enemy but I was there to rat on them for said enemy.
"Baby" A voice calls and I snap my head to the side, thankful that the water was on my face to cover the tears that were falling.
"Shower" I call back
I watch with hooded eyes as Happy walks into the bathroom, a smirk covering his face as he looks at me in the shower. How he can see through the steam I'll never know but the question dies on my tongue as he begins stripping off and comes into the shower with me.
"Now there's a sight I like to see" He murmurs his voice low
"What me all wet" I purr
His smirk grows before his hands shoot out and grab my hips lifting me up against the shower wall, I wrap my legs around his waist and pull him in closer as his lips attach to mine in a sort of gentle way, a change from how we normally kiss, all teeth and blood. I hiss as he pumps his fill length inside me in one stroke, I throw my head back as his lips drop lower towards my neck his lips ghosting over some of the marks he's left their, some days old and some from just last night. He'd learnt his lesson about leaving a big ring of bruises and instead he just as he calls it 'marks his territory'.
I grip hold of his shoulder tightly my nails causing crescent mood dips in his skin as his pumps become faster and faster, small gasps leave my lips as I try to catch my breath and fail, my moans and hiss growing more stoked as the fire in my stomach growls into an inferno.
"Come on baby" Happy hisses in my ear "Let me feel you release all over my dick"
As though my body was waiting for his order my release hits hard and fast, my body quivering and jerking and my eyes roll into the back of my head as all breathe leaves my body, Happy follows soon after his head burying in my shoulder and my name slipping past his lips like a prayer.
He lets me down onto shaky feet and I bury my head in his chest, his arms coming around my shoulders to hold me closer. I place a chaste kiss against his snake tattoo before pulling back, my fingers tracing all his smiley faces.
"Bad day" I ask, quietly but load enough to be heard over the spray of the water
He nods and I sigh, hoping he would just open up to me. God knows I can handle it.
"What happened" I press hoping it doesn't back fire
He sighs and runs a hand over his bald head and down his face, his eyes staring into mine and I stare right back not backing down.
"The reapers got there first" I look at him confused, playing the part of a confused outsider "The Hell's reapers" he clarifies
I nod and he turns off the shower and steps out grabbing a towel and another handing it to me. I wrap it around my body and look back at him.
"They sent fucking Chaos for the guy. We must have only been five minutes behind her but she got to the guy first and fucking killed him"
I blink at the venom in his voice as he says Chaos and the guilt sets back in as I realize that he hates me, well not this me but the other me. Okay I just confused myself I look back at him and sigh.
"But you guys were going to kill him won't you?" I ask as I follow him back into the room
"No" he replies digging into his drawers before throwing a shirt at me "We needed him alive to do this deal but the fucking reapers have just shit on that again"
"Again" I ask trembling slightly, this was a bit more truth then I wanted but I hold out listening as he talks. Hell it's the most I've ever gotten him to talk in the last two months.
He points the bed and I finish drying my hair as best I can and climb in, watching as he throws my smokes at me and passes me the ashtray before climbing in himself. I light a smoke up and turn to look at him.
"We were meant to do this protection run last week but the reapers got in the way and ended up becoming a major shootout"
"Juice and my dad got shot" I murmur remembering last week when I had to help pull the bullets out their shoulder and clean them up
"For some reasons the reapers have stepped up their hate for us" he sighs pulling me into his side and I lift my arm making sure my cigarette doesn't burn him
"So what happens now" I whisper
"You don't go anywhere without a prospect with you, do you hear me" He growls and I nod "If something happened to you" He stops and I kiss his chest
"Anyway what did you do today" he asks changing the subject and I allow him to, he's not one to talk about his feelings and I'm fine with that, I'm not a big emotional speaker myself.
I tell him the same lie I told Aunt Gemma and the squeeze on my ass lets me know he's in total agreement with me getting my own place. I finish my smoke and place the ashtray on his side of the bed seeing as I'm next to the wall and climb up his body throwing my legs over his hips. I lean down and place my lips against his hoping to distract him so I don't have to tell anymore lies or hear anymore truths I don't want to hear.
And from the bulge growing near my ass I'd say he was okay with my distraction.
0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0-0
I sigh as I follow Aunt Gemma and the estate agent into the fifth house of the day, my gun rubbing against the back of my trousers, the only reason I'm carrying it is me and Gemma had strict orders from Clay to carry them. I smirk as I remember when they found out I carried one and knew how to shoot, my dad looked as though he'd just swallowed a mouth full of bleach until I managed to say I carried It because there were bad people where I lived. I was thankful that I had bought a house in a shitty neighbourhood, but never lived there, so when Juice went digging it confirmed what I said.
I look at the outside of the house and smile, it's large patio housed a swing that I could see myself sitting on with a beer, maybe curled into Happy's side, maybe watching our kids running around the large garden. I stop myself at that image, I shouldn't be thinking about a future with Happy, there was no way that it would happen as sooner or later the truth will come out and the guys will be forced to kill me. I shake my head and follow Aunt Gemma as she continues to criticize the house like she had done the last four.
"The house has four bedrooms, five bathrooms, a large front garden as you saw but the back garden is larger with a patio a hot tub as well as a shed in the back. The garage can fill up to five cars and the kitchen comes complete with an extension for a big table" The estate agent reels off as we follow her into the kitchen and I smirk as I see the large table.
"It's as big as yours Aunt Gem" I smirk looking at it
"Works for big family dinners" she agrees
We follow the estate agent around the house, it was fully furnished and Aunt Gemma seemed to like the furniture present as she didn't criticize it too much, only the decorating. Once we enter the master bedroom I smirk as I see a large four poster bed in black and smirk at all the images that come filtering into my head, I turn to the estate agent to see her looking apprehensive.
"I'll take it"
She lets out a sigh and says she'll go get the paperwork as me and Aunt Gem finish looking around.
"Remind me to be nowhere near this house when you and Happy christen it" she smirks and I look at her weird to be met with a laugh "Nikki baby he hasn't left you alone since you two started sleeping together two months ago. He isn't going to let you be in a big house on your own now is he"
"Probably not" I shrug
She shakes her head and tells me to go fill out my paperwork whilst she writes a list of all the stuff I need and also the shopping list we're going to need. As apparently I'm holding the family dinner tomorrow. Awesome.
End Note – Just a little question – Should Happy make Nikki his old lady and make her get the crow. Or all that come in the sequel – YES THERE IS GOING TO BE A SEQUEL. I already have some of it planned out. Let me know. AND PLEASE REVIEW.
