Chapter 8
"Yes, literally stepped in the room. What the hell did you think I meant?" I asked her, because to be honest, she had lost me.
"Well, I thought you meant you were thinking of him and meant it figuratively or some shit. What the hell was he doing there?" A few more fries lost their sad lives at her hand.
"He said his mom called him and asked him to get Drew's charger cord or some shit. How was I supposed to listen to him when I was naked, sopping wet, a loud assed porn video playing on my laptop, and my vibrator thumping against the floor where I dropped it? Really, it didn't matter if he was there to tell me the world was coming to an end, he was there and that was enough!" I yelled in the loudest whisper quiet voice I could muster.
"Oh no, if he was there to tell you the world was ending then you leave the vibe on the floor and fuck him! I mean, what's the harm then, right?" Her eyes widen as she asked, like this was a real possibility in her mind and she needed clarification.
"Angela, do you smoke crack?" I asked in all seriousness.
"Nah, I gave that shit up years ago." She waved her hand dismissively and ate another fry. This was when my mouth dropped open. It was amazing what you could learn about people you thought you knew for so many years. You find out you don't know them at all. She giggled and now I really wondered if she meant that last comment or not. I shook my head and moved on, there really was no telling with Angela.
"So, now how am I supposed to look him in the eye from now on? I mean, I know we're not married anymore, but I do have to see him…often." I shrugged and really hoped she had advice to offer on the subject.
"Bella, really?" she asked. I nodded and she continued. "He probably rushed home to spank his monkey so fucking hard after catching that, it's not even funny. He'll remember that for his entire life, why the hell are you worried?" I shrugged again. "What did he say when he saw you?" I bit my thumb nail and held it in my mouth, then I worried that this made me look like a fake porn star and dropped it to my lap again.
"He said he was here for the charger and Bumpy. He said he tried to call but I didn't answer. I guess I was in the shower then, who knows. Then I realized that the porn was still playing and slammed my laptop, only to realize that now the vibe thumped loudly on the floor where I dropped it." I slapped my thigh as I said the last part. I was exasperated all over again. "Then he just turned and left. I heard the door slam a few minutes later, so I don't know if he got what he came for or not. I was too embarrassed to go down to see." Angela began to laugh- a full belly laugh.
A laugh that drew the eyes of the entire Bistro…again.
"Angela, first of all, keep it down. Second…what the hell is so funny?" I demanded.
"I told you he went home to spank it, I would bet my entire drawer full of cashmere scarves on it. Come on, bet me." She threw her hand out to me as if I should shake it and actually take the bet. I looked from her hand to her face and back again. "Wait…it was the one with the large dark haired dude with the massive cock, right?" I glanced around and nodded. I didn't need clarification on her comment. I knew she meant the exact porn video I was watching. She had sent me an email with about ten links. "I knew it, the one with the large white couch? I fucking love him. He is so rough and then so sweet the next second. Did you see the third or fourth video I sent, he held that girl while she shook all over as she came? He is amazing." Her last words were drawn out in a sing-song falsetto voice. I needed to leave now, otherwise all of Forks were definitely going to know what I did last night and who witnessed it.
I stood up and gathered my things. "I've got to get back, thanks for…uhm, yeah. See ya." I walked away from her. I knew I left her with the bill, and it gave me some satisfaction, at least a small amount.
"Watch the last one, he's massive and uncut too!" she yelled at me as I pushed the door open and left the Bistro as if she spoke to someone else entirely.
