.

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With those hopeless thoughts Barbara went straight to bed and tried to sleep but the illuminated digits on her stupid travel alarm clock counted down the minutes to midnight deathly slow and even when it showed 00:01 and she had rolled onto the other side so she would not have to see the time she still could not find sleep.

It felt like half an hour had gone by but when she dared to take another look it only was 00:02. Then she suddenly heard the three middle part stairs creaking and she froze. A soft knock was heard at her door and it opened before she could call him in.

"Barbara?" he whispered into the dark that was moments later lit by a flickering orange light coming from a candle he had brought with him.

"What?" She sounded tired, but not sleepy.

"Can I come in?" His intonation sounded careful but his voice was close to her bed already.

"You're already standing at my b..." Speaking Barbara had turned. When she saw Tommy holding a bowl with a candle in it she stopped. "Oh."

Tommy smiled. "I'm sorry if I woke y-"

"You haven't." Barbara quickly said cutting him short. Then she sat up and moved back against the headboard. She turned on the little light on the most dimmed level so she could at least see better, what he was holding. In a nice cereal bowl there was some dark ice cream topped with white chocolate sprinkles and a candle from the dinner table simply was poked into the slowly melting mass. She had to snort a laugh. It looked too cute.

Tommy shrugged. "I'm sorry it doesn't look very... impressive. I hadn't planned it like that but I couldn't really buy you a cake at the superstore, could I? You would have seen it, at the latest when we had met at the cashier. And then I've found this in the freezer."

"You know I love chocolate ice cream, Sir."

"I know." With a bright smile he held the bowl out to her. Her heart was melting like its contents. "Happy birthday, Barbara."

"Thank you, Tommy." Her voice was soft and it sent a shiver down his spine. The accidental touch to his hands when she took the bowl made her heart make an additional beat. Tommy also handed her a teaspoon. "Sit down. I'll share it with you."

"I had hoped so." Tommy waved a second teaspoon. It made her grin.

Barbara was so glad that it was still quite dark in the room so he could not see her blush.


Fortunately he was not sitting down on the edge of her bed but carried one of the armchairs to her side. Her eyes had followed him and when he sat Barbara blew out the candle.

"Did you make a wish?" he asked.

"Of course." she chuckled and kept it to herself of course although he cocked his head in a pretty cute curious way.

Tommy had to laugh out loud when Barbara cringed about the taste of candle wax with chocolate ice cream. Her funny face when she had licked it off took all other naughty thoughts from his mind. She shuddered before she placed the candle on her bedside table. "Ugh. Disgusting!"

The chocolate ice cream though was all but disgusting.

"Mh. I have to admit that I thought you forgot it." Barbara mumbled after two dainty bits.

"Forgot it?" Tommy asked and raised his eyebrows the way she loved it. She quickly looked into the ice cream again.

"Well, yes. That it's my birthday today." she explained. "You haven't mentioned it with one single word from the moment you've called me on my way to work."

"How could I, Barbara?" he smiled. "In fact I must confess that I've had it on my mind all the time."

His smile was so disarming that it made her nervously tuck in more of the fantastic ice cream.

In fact it was the best ice cream Barbara ever had tasted. It was so much darker than all the cheap stuff she usually had from the supermarket. It really was delicious. And the way Tommy was licking his spoon brought up thoughts into her mind that were unmentionable. And the intense way he suddenly looked at her made her quickly stop nibbling at her own spoon that had become quite clean while she had watched him.

Clearing her throat she dug the spoon into the bowl again.

When they had consumed it completely Tommy put the empty bowl on the night stand and leant back in his chair. A conversation about good and bad ice cream had turned into a light discussion about prices, supermarkets and delicatessen shops until Barbara accused him of not going grocery shopping on his own. Tommy laughed and lifted his legs.

"And how do you think the food gets into my freezer?" He had placed his feet in socks onto her bed. Barbara grinned. "By magic?"

"You surely have your servants."

"Oh, Barbara, you know I haven't."

Pensively she nodded. They had been to the supermarket several times when they had gone home to finish work at his or sometimes her home. Still she loved to tease him. Especially when he seemed so relaxed to lounge like that in the armchair while she still was confused to have him next to her while she was sitting in bed.


Eventually she forgot the tension. They were talking leisurely about the shopping trip with Deb and Simon, the house, Kent and how far they have come together even though there still were so many differences between them. Differences that did not seem to matter, less and less over all those years. What had been a clash of everything they were, with their radically differing backgrounds and opinions, had turned into a complementing partnership that nobody ever had expected. And it was a strong partnership that slowly also had crept into their private lives. Throughout the years they had discovered numerous unexpected similarities and right now they were very at ease with each other. Right now at the moment even more.

Unrecognised by neither of them they had begun to talk about very personal things, discovered and revealed secrets and eventually told each other what they liked. Barbara praised him for not flying off the handle as quickly as he had the tendency to years ago and that he had become less elitist, no matter how stupid his comments sometimes still were. A fact she had realised not very long ago and finally found the courage to tell him tonight. It made Tommy smile, a bit proud and a bit soft, with eyes trying to tell her that he thought it was her influence. Then he told her. He also told her that he loved seeing her becoming less harsh and that nowadays she knew she could trust the people that are with her.

"You let them in. Finally." he softly said and smiled at her.

"Do I?" Barbara murmured picking at an invisible thread on her bed cover.

"Of course you do." Tommy leant over and covered her hand with his. She stopped fidgeting with a deep sigh. "And I'm glad you've let me in."

Barbara looked up to try to decipher the expression on his face. He smiled uninterpretable. She looked away again.

"Well, and I'm glad you do listen to me from time to time." she said.

Tommy gave a soft laugh. "You've made me a better person."


"Nah..." Now it was her turn to laugh.

"Yes." he firmly stated. "I was an arrogant idiot. I think, I still am when I'm... Well, you're my safe outlet and I really bark at you too often."

"Ah... I'm enduring you. Everyone has to rant from time to time. I do understand that. Who would, if not me?" They laughed together. "I mean, I'm the inventor of ranting, right?"

"I endure you." When their laughs had ebbed he smiled at her without restrictions. "Really, I don't just endure you. I enjoy every moment we spend together being honestly open to each other."

"Yah, I enjoy it too." she confessed.

"And therefore I'd like to apologise again for my stupid elitist comment from earlier. I shouldn't have said that."

"Well, there's a tiny truth in your words, Sir."

"Don't!"

"What?"

"Don't call me Sir." He looked pleading. "At least in private you should call me by my given name. Constantly."

"I did."

"Indeed. But only once or twice." Tommy knew exactly how often she did it and he remembered every situation. "I'd love to hear you say it more often. It would mean so much to me."

"Okay, I will." Barbara yawned and caught the sight of her alarm clock. It was shortly after one o'clock. "Oh, gosh, it's late, Tommy!"

"Well, I had hoped to hear you say my name differently and not as a bouncer," Tommy chuckled. "but yes, I should leave you alone now and let you sleep." Tommy got up and put away the armchair. When he returned he sat down at the edge of Barbara's bed. "Can I give you a good night kiss or will you slap my face?"

She rolled her eyes. "I won't. I have forgiven you for kidnapping me." Only then she realised what she had allowed him to do but he already leaned over before she was able to overthink it. In fact she even moved her head towards his.

Softly touching her lips with his Tommy gave her a brief good night kiss. Barbara was surprised because she had expected him to give her a simple peck on the cheek. She had to swallow hard and forced herself to breathe again.

"Sleep well, Barbara."

"Good night, Tommy."

He took the empty bowl with him when he left her room.


The memories of the soft pressure of his lips on hers kept Barbara awake for almost two more hours wondering what he was thinking about her response to the brief kiss. The confusion only slowly vanished but when she finally fell asleep a happy smile had emerged on her face.

Tommy also was thinking a lot. Her unexpected reaction made him toss and turn in his bed for almost two more hours before he forced himself to just treasure the memory, keep it and let it be a nice trigger for a wonderful dream. And tomorrow he planned to explore it all further.

They had not exactly done what Deborah thought they would but for all the inhibitions they still had it had come very close.


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