A/N-this chapter kind of got away from me but I think that given the circumstances of the characters, it was the only way to go. Please tell me if I am right.

The 19th Hunger Games – You Reap What You Sow

Part VIIII - Let the Games Begin

The Present

Rachel feels the blades of three knives and large axe that are currently strapped to her back, cut into her flesh. But she knows she cannot move, not unless she wants to be blown to bits. The pouches of food and other supplies strapped to her sides acting like a counter balance as she stands on the small metal plate knowing she cannot step off until one of the tributes takes her place or manages to deactivate the mine beneath it. There are small knives and some food scattered away from her but Rachel knows that she is the focus or rather what she has with her.

She sees them all looking at her, eyes squinting in the sun even as some try to figure out how to get to her or to get to the supplies she's currently carrying. Her own outfit seemingly much more elaborate than any of theirs. All they're wearing are pants and a t-shirt while she's decked out with a jacket, a utility belt and cargo pants with zippers and compartments.

So that when the two lines of tributes look at her, all they see are supplies and a better chance at survival but not a person who herself wants to live. No one else allowed to carry anything in the Games except for her. She was to become their pack horse, hence, to access the supplies, they needed her to stay alive because if dead, her body and whatever she's carrying would be taken away.

She had listen to the prep team as they dressed her, understanding that all of it was connected to her in some way, steeling herself against the pain as they inserted wires into her flesh, linking her to the weapons and ensuring that all the supplies were controlled only by her. As long as her heart continued to beat, she would be able to open each compartment and give access.

The only part she didn't get was when the Head of the Prep Team held on to her hand before injecting her with a capsule between her thumb and pointer finger. The pain taking her by surprise but not as much as the woman's whispered words. "Your father sends his love." Rachel had been too shocked to process the words much less their meaning but she recognised the woman's eyes even if she cannot bring herself to acknowledge anything else.

But even if Rachel had wanted to question her, it seemed like she had imagined it as Shelby started explaining the one new rule of this year's Games. The rule that would keep her alive up until the supplies ran out or someone decided that she wasn't useful any longer.

Rachel stares defiantly back now, at all the twenty three tributes staring right at her. She does it mainly because she wants to catch Quinn's eyes, to say that one last goodbye but the blonde does not look at her and Rachel knows that it's all her own damned fault.

Only she knows that having Quinn hate her was better than having Quinn dead and even if her heart ached so much that she actually feels like stepping off the platform and ending everything, she doesn't move. Her eyes finally settling on the blonde at the end of the tribute line to her left, who is looking down at her feet.

Rachel needs just one more reminder to carry her through these last days as she sends up a prayer to Quinn's God, she needs to see hazel eyes just one more time and it would have to be enough. She already felt like she was dying so she knows the real thing wouldn't be so bad.

And as if by some miracle, she finally sees Quinn finally raise her head and meet her eyes. And she wishes she sees hate in them and hoped that she would see love but all that is reflected back is hurt such that she almost staggers off the plate only to catch herself. Her throat is dry and she really can't form words so she does the one thing she knows Quinn will understand.

She forms an L with her fingers and puts it over her heart. And when the whistle blows and she sees the rush of a number of tributes in her direction, all she can see is Quinn looking at her one last time before running towards the forest, away from her.

48 hours Earlier

"Are you ok?" Will's voice startles Emma as she drops the brush she'd been washing for the past ten minutes. She turns to look at him, her eyes wide and brimming with tears as she shakes her head.

"They're all going to…oh my god.." She covers her mouth and runs towards the bathroom and Will knows exactly what she feels like but he does not follow her because he cannot give her any comfort since he knows he has a hand in all their deaths. Instead he looks for Shelby. The message she left him was cryptic and he wonders what she wants with him now, their relationship already stalled before it actually began but still they remained friends. And he knows she wants to tell him something but hasn't built up the courage as yet.

"Will." He hears his name and sees her beckoning him towards her private room in the back. He's more than surprised to see a few sketches scattered around, that she tries to gather before he can get a good look only to realize they're of the mayor's daughter from District 1. He used to be able to call them tributes, distancing himself but just not this year.

"What are these?" He snatches one away and it hits him. The similarities he sees in the drawing to Shelby and her reaction is almost visceral as she looks at him, stricken. "Who is she to you?"

"I can't let her die, Will." Hiram's anxious tear filled voice already ringing in her ears. She had wanted to avoid the call but relented because he was her brother and she owed him her life. But hearing his devastating news and his plea for help was almost too much and even now, she knows there was little she could do but she would still try regardless.

And as soon as he realizes what she's asking of him, Will shakes his head, almost wanting to laugh. His own words making her go pale. "She's already dead, most of them are except for maybe the boys from 10 or 2."

"Please, there must be something, she's my…she's my daughter." She has never said those words out loud but saying them now makes her finally realize what she's already lost and that strong impetus to not lose Rachel. "I'll do anything." She grabs his arm, her words promising anything and Will knows that he can take advantage if he so chooses, only he cannot imagine what it must be like to lose someone in the Games.

All he knows is his own hand in their deaths and that feeling like he's drowning and the only thing that he can do is drink to forget. "There's nothing to be done." But even as he says the words and sees the effect they have on Shelby, he thinks that maybe, maybe they could do something because if he didn't, he wouldn't be able to last the year.

"They're.." He stops to correct himself. "We're going to keep her alive…at least for the first few days." They had asked Santana to design a special outfit for Rachel Berry. That had been Sue's brilliant idea. Initially, they were just going to make her carry a pack but Sue wanted more drama and insisted that the weapons and food be as much a part of Rachel as they could manage.

The tributes would have to learn to use Rachel to kill as much as to survive. It was devious and so very like Sue to think of it. But Will knew that it could be used as well.

"Your team is going to make the outfit. Ensure that the weapons are attached and the food strapped to her, only available bit by bit. Each compartment only allowed to be opened one at a time." He looks straight at Shelby, hoping she understands exactly what he's saying.

"We're having the inventory sent up in a few hours." He really does not know what Shelby can do in that short span of time but it's really all he can do here.

"She will have access to all of it?" Shelby's question at least giving him some indication that she has maybe an idea of what she could do.

"In time, yes." 'if she survives' He does not verbalize that thought even though he sees that Shelby understands.

And when she nods at him as if grateful, he really hopes that she really does manage to do something because he's pretty sure that he won't be here this time next year.

24 Hours Earlier

All she knows is that she will die and so will the girl currently in her arms. That only thought so prominent in her mind such that she let's herself react to whatever she's feeling even if what she knows and what she feels in her heart are so diametrically opposite. Such that Quinn feels pulled in two directions, her heart and soul anchored with the girl kissing her but her mind still stuck on the fact that the Capitol and her father's religion would deny them and she would die for this.

She cannot reconcile how something that feels so right, so good can be wrong and after that first kiss, when she had pulled back and looked into Rachel's eyes, the choice in her head was so simple. Her faith was built on love and acceptance and there was no denying that she finally understands fully what that means right here, right now.

So when Rachel looked back at her with some trepidation, as if she was afraid and did not know what to do next, Quinn leaned forward, her hand gently going to Rachel's neck as she pulled the girl forward to resume the kiss.

It's all so new to her and somehow, she knows that it's new to Rachel as well, like they've been two halves of a whole but never realizing it until this very moment. Somehow, recognizing in the other something undefinable, a gravitational pull towards each other that felt right even if everything else around them was so fucking wrong.

So Quinn gives herself fully, not holding back as her hands roam Rachel's body, finally giving in to the need to feel as close to the girl as possible as she allows Rachel to pull off her shirt. Her own breath lost when Rachel removes her clothes.

The kisses are feather light but she feels each and every one of them mark her, their imprint burned into her skin and all she feels is this sense of being loved. It's a feeling so obscure in her mind that she has trouble identifying it at first only to finally understand that what she feels for the brunette currently kissing her is pure love.

Quinn's hands roam Rachel's body, finally cupping small breasts as Rachel nips at her neck and every sensation is new and almost unbearable because she knows it cannot last, that what she's found will disappear tomorrow and she cannot do anything about it except to fully experience it now.

The kiss Rachel bestows on her is different form the others, not as urgent but still demanding. "Don't think of it, not of the Games or any of it." Rachel's whispered words pleading in her ear and she tries her best to acquiesce.

She feels Rachel's fingers roam downwards as she arches her back, knowing what is coming and wondering if she would feel the same sensations again, that feeling of being powerless and still in control at the same time, of connecting body and soul with someone if only for that instant but to have that instant expand in time because it's a connection forged of love.

Quinn's going by instinct and need, not really understanding what's driving this but feeling such a strong pull to Rachel that she does not second guess her reactions. That first kiss initiated by Rachel opening a floodgate of emotions so strong, that all she accepts is the singular impetus to know Rachel inside and out, to taste and explore the brunette and captures that essence she had seen that first time she laid eyes on her.

"Oh God, Rachel.." She literally sees stars, her vision blotting out as soon as Rachel's fingers enter her and she buries her head in the crook of Rachel's neck, their bodies pressed together such that Quinn can feel Rachel's heartbeat even as she taste the salty sweetness of Rachel's skin.

"It's ok, I'm here, I have you, I'm here." And all Quinn can feel is Rachel there with her, surrounding her, making her feel safe and warm and loved. Everything else that occurred up to this point in her life had been difficult if not outright bad but if that was what was needed in order to get to this second, then Quinn doesn't regret any of it.

She blinks open her eyes to see Rachel staring at her. "You're an angel." She makes an L with her fingers and holds them over her heart. A symbol of love from her District that she knows Rachel won't understand but it's the only thing she can do.

The blush it elicits from the brunette is making her feel things that she knows will lead to other things and it just spurs her to kiss Rachel in that one spot that makes her moan her name in that beautiful voice of hers.

Each kiss now preceded by a word." You are my Angel." This connection she feels is so strong such that her next words are to be expected even if Rachel feels completely blindsided.

"I'll protect you. During the Games, no one's going to hurt you. I promise. I'll tell Sam. You'll be safe." The kiss Quinn bestows on her on that last word is so sweet even if it feels like ashes to Rachel.

Because even if those words were the one that she knows she wants to hear it wasn't supposed to be like this. It made this thing between them seem tainted, it made her feel like she'd planned this.

"No." Her voice is strained as her hand goes to cup Quinn's cheek. "No, that's not how it works." She knows her eyes are tearing because all she feels is this need to touch Quinn, to make the blonde feel all these emotions that she has within her.

"I don't care." Quinn reaches for Rachel hand, pulling it towards her and kissing her palm. "You're going to be safe."

And Rachel knows that Quinn means it, no matter how impossible it was to do. She was going to do everything in her power to protect her which meant she wouldn't be protecting herself which would lead to her being an easy target. And one word suddenly becomes so crystal clear in her mind that she has to bite her tongue from saying it out loud.

'Lie'

Her father was right. She really was so good at it that it colored all her decisions and even if she knows deep down she wanted this from the second she had looked in Quinn's eyes, Rachel knows what she does not want is to have Quinn's death on her hands.

Even before she says the words, she can feel her heart constrict but she says them regardless. "This never happened."

She keeps eye contact even as she pulls her hand out of Quinn's grasp, just to see her words take effect. How Quinn puts them together in her head and looks at her askance because she does not understand.

Rachel actually feels physically ill and it's a wonder that she can actually articulate anything but she does even if she feels pieces of her heart slice off each time she says another word. "Don't you get it?"

She focuses on the crack in the far wall and not on Hazel eyes brimming with tears. "This never happened and I'm going to get dressed and walk out that door and while you were….good." She sees Quinn shudder on that word and it almost breaks her resolve but she knows she has to be stronger than that.

"That's all it's ever going to be. It's in the past because we have no future." Her voice is so damn fucking calm even if all she wants to do is to reach out and never let Quinn go. But she stays perfectly still and it's Quinn who finally moves.

No words or eye contact as Quinn gets dressed and its only when she reaches the door, her hand on the handle does she angle her body towards Rachel but still does not look at her. "I…I won't ever forget this." The words so softly spoken that Rachel has to strain to hear them over the noise of the boilers. And even when she does, Rachel does not know what to make of them.

She had broken Quinn's heart and Rachel knows that it's something that no one could forget even if deep down, she wishes Quinn was talking about their love and not the heartbreak.

1 Hour earlier

They had been transported in batches, divided into 2 teams each dressed in the same color. The twelve of them dressed in blue while the team of tributes that left before them were in red.

She sees Finn staring at her even as Sam tries to stare him down. And the Tributes from District 2 looking ready for a fight, while the ones from District 3 not making any eye contact and it surprises and scares her that Rachel is not there. Even if to a certain degree, Quinn is glad for that.

She didn't think that her heart could take seeing the brunette and never being able to touch her in a way to show that she was special or acknowledging that they had shared something special. Rachel had been clear about their encounter. Not wanting to acknowledge it at all, wanting to forget even if Quinn won't ever be able to do so.

However, its only when the Gamemaker with them mentions Rachel's name does she finally understand how this year's Game is to be played. How the arbitrary teams they created were all going to have to fight each other while trying to get to Rachel. Every single tribute there would want Rachel alive and with them because she had what they needed. To every other tribute, it would be weapons and supplies but to Quinn, Rachel had her heart.

And Quinn hates that she feels relief at that but she does and it's the only thing she thinks about the entire time until she's standing on the plate, her eyes looking at her feet. She feels Rachel's eyes on her and only when she figures out what she needs to do, does she finally make eye contact.

Quinn won't hide her hurt but when she sees Rachel lift her fingers to her heart, she understands completely what she wants to do and just waits for the whistle to blow.

End Part VIIII