A/N: So allow me to introduce myself. I'm Whispering Ember and I used to be on this site all the time. But then I became an adult and it really sucked. This story taunts me… It keeps running through my mind knowing full well I don't have time to write it down. DAMN YOU CREATIVITY YOU NEVER COME TO ME WHEN I NEED YOU! But anyway here's chapter nine.
Bella had soon fallen asleep, rolling over and pushing me away slightly with her foot. I smiled as I brushed a piece of hair out of my face. I let my hand wander down her body and rest on her waist. There I saw faint bruises my hands had left. My happy aura seemed to dim a slightly as I traced the black and blue blemishes as my self-loathing set in. Some things never changed. But there was no way I could leave her again. It was very clear that that had done neither of us good. And now it was more than just get and I in the equation. Now there was Alainya.
My eyes wandered to her arm. Her skin seemed to glow in the moonlight shining through the window. I furrowed my brow as I looked at her arm. Not certain that what I was seeing was real I gently lifted her arm to examine it. Several bright white scars revealed themselves to me. My fingers traced across each of them. I had thought I couldn't hate myself more. Every second that passed it was becoming more apparent that me leaving her was the worst thing I could have ever done.
Out of the corner of my eye I saw my cell phone light up. As gently as possible I disentangled myself from Bella and pulled my cell phone out of my pants pocket.
"Hi, Alice."
"So are you with Bella right now?" She asked.
Holding the phone between my shoulder and ear I pulled my pants on and walked out of the room, "I would think you'd know what happened."
She detected the slight playful tone in my voice and sighed, "I would think so too, but I can't see her."
I cocked my head to the side, "Wait, what? But you saw her just the other day."
"I know, but she has completely disappeared from me."
"Is that… good or bad." I heard the bed creak in Bella's bedroom and heard her shuffle from one side of the room to the other. I silently slipped into the hallway.
"Well I can still sense she is there, but I can't see her. Anything she does… nothing." I shook my head not sure how to respond, "So I take it you are with her now?"
"Yes."
"What happened? Is what we thought true?"
"Yes, and no."
Alice was silent for a moment, "Now I don't understand."
"Do you remember a year ago when I disappeared for two days? And you couldn't make sense of anything I was doing?"
"Yeah, right before you insisted we leave Forks." She replied bluntly.
I was silent for a moment, "…Yes." I sighed, "I followed some of Carlisle's notes. He had studied rumors about a witch that would change reality. But his studies never lead anywhere." I hesitated, "Well the rumors turned out to be true."
"Edward… What did you do?" Alice's voice was low, wary.
"A lot of is a blur now. But she had made me human for one day." I took a deep breath waited for her response, "… Are you still there?" I asked when she said nothing.
"Continue."
"Well, Bella and I spent the day together, and I got to experience things through her eyes… so to speak." I swallowed, "Because we were both human and human emotions were new to me… Or renewed either way you want to look at it. But one thing led to another and uh… We had sex." Alice was silent, "She got pregnant Alice."
"Oh my god." I could almost hear her mind working as she processed this information, "Why is she in New Hampshire?"
"She couldn't stand being in Forks so she picked up her things and just left. Ended up here. That's when she found out she was pregnant."
"Did she have it?"
I smiled slightly, "Yeah… It's a girl. She named her Alainya."
Alice giggled, "I'm an Aunt?"
"Yeah…"
"You're a Father?" She squealed.
This time I just chuckled I could almost see her jumping up and down, "When do we get to see her? Do we get to see her? Who does she look more like?..." Alice's questions continued on and on and the more she asked the quicker her voice became. As I waited for her to take a breath I heard bare feet pad across the floor and the patio door open and then shut.
"Alice, I can answer all of those when I get back home, but I'm not one hundred percent sure on what's going on yet, but I have to go."
"Edward, what..."
"Alice, I will fill you in later." I pressed end on my phone and silently slipped back into the apartment. Outside I saw Bella leaning against the railing, her back to me, a cloud of smoke surrounding her. She had donned her flannel pajamas again and a black tank top.
I walked up behind her, placing my hands on her hips as she stood up straight. I leaned down until my lips touched her hair and kissed her lightly. Her entire body went ridged. Slowly I stood up straight. Slowly my hands fell from her hips. She looked down and took another drag of her cigarette.
"Bella?"
"I think you should go."
The wind whipped around us as silence filled the air.
"What?"
"I have to get to sleep, Alainya will be up at 8:30 on the dot and I need to get some sleep." She tossed the butt of her cigarette over the ledge and then turned and walked passed me inside. I stood there a moment, trying to process her sudden change in mood, then followed her inside. She stood at the refrigerator, poking through the different beverages.
"What's…"
"Edward what do you think is going on here?" She turned to me, slamming the door, "Did you really think that you could walk back in here and I would open my arms proclaiming how much I miss you and what not?" I didn't reply, "That Bella you knew is gone, Edward. I have a child now. I'm taking classes so I can support her. I still have to work tomorrow night. Though you've just strutted back into my life, it doesn't stop for you." She crossed her arms and looked away from me.
"Bella, I can't just…"
"I don't need anything from you." She said bluntly, "I have supported myself and my child and I will carry on in just the same way."
"Bella you're floundering."
Her head whipped around her eyes narrowing, "Excuse me?"
I sighed taking a step toward her, "You can't be happy with the type of environment that you are raising Alainya in. During the nights you are gone, during the day you are tired and cold pushing everyone one away. Why are you over here in New Hampshire? Why isn't Charlie a part of your life right now?" I watched her face turn red but not with the embarrassment but with anger, "I just want what's best for you and Alainya."
"Don't you dare, don't you dare tell me what is and is not best. You've already proven you don't know shit. You may not agree with my decisions, but you can tell me I am not there for my child, and I purposefully say my child."
"Well, Alainya isn't just you're child, she's mine as well. I can't just walk away from you." I stepped closer to her.
"I don't need you."
"But I need you!" Grabbing the back of her neck, almost roughly, I pulled her to me. Her eyes flew open with shock. Shaking her slightly to reinforce my statement I said softly, "I need you." I pressed my forehead against hers and took a shuddering breath, calming myself down, "God Bella, please stop pushing me away. I hate myself for what I did. I regret nothing more than what I did to you. I need you."
Her hard shield shattered. Her lip starting to quiver, her eyes closing as her head tilted towards the ground. Slowly she raised her hand to place it on top of mind as she looked back up at me, "Please," she whispered softly, "just go…"
Looking into her eyes I realized that this night, I wouldn't get through to her. So slowly I pulled my hands away.
The next moment I was in the dark hallway, my back pressed against the wall. I felt drained, empty, not like my heart was ripped out, but as if it were never there, and the hole ached. From her door I heard to the soft thud as she leaned against the wall and the soft scraping as she slid to the floor. Her soft cries filled the air, only heard by my ears.
A/N: So I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter. To be honest, during New Moon I thought Bella let Edward off the hook too easily. I'm sorry Eddy, but you done fucked up and I personally would have been really… REALLY bitter. So that's that. See you guys in another six months for chapter ten o.O *Dodges computer chairs*
