Hello! Again here's the next chapter I promised.

Finally

K- I was wondering when you would grow a pair. Brian said you had something to say to me so talk.

T-How was your date with Ray?

K- Are you serious? That's all you wanted to say? It was great if you really must know. If that's all you can go now.

T- Relax. I was just making conversation.

K-Well I'm not really in a conversing mood right now.

T- Kai I just—

K- Go away Tala.

T- No. I need to say something and I need to say it now before I punk out again.

K- Tala, I'm tired.

T- Oh really. I wonder if it has anything to do with your extracurricular activities last night.

K- No stupid, you really don't get it. I'm tired of waiting for you. I'm tired of hoping that today is the day that you come to your senses. I'm sick of thinking that maybe I was the one who did something wrong. I'm am tired of loving you when its clear you don't love me back. I'm just…he takes a deep breath…really, really tired Tala. So please just go away.

T- No. I won't go away. I can't because if I do now, I may not have another chance. I swear I'm not going to leave you again. I know you're tired of my stupidity and I know I would be too if things were the other way around but please let me just say what I came to say. I promise you won't have to wait any more. But if you still want me to leave when I'm done I promise I will and I won't come back but please just let me talk first.

K- You can say what you came to say but I can't promise you anything.

T-Kai I love you. More than you know and I always have and I always will. I know you didn't just up and leave us. I saw them take you and I didn't do anything. I figured it was just like every other night they experimented on us. But that morning you didn't come back. No one would tell us anything. The guards just acted like you never existed and then Boris finally told us that you were dead. I couldn't move. I couldn't breathe. It felt like I was the one that died. The first year you were gone I blamed myself and I guess I still do. I kept telling myself that if I had said something then, if I begged them to leave you alone, they would have taken me instead. I would be the one dead and you would still have a chance to make it out alive. Eventually, I just couldn't take it anymore. I couldn't take the guilt and I tried to kill myself for the first time. Naturally, Boris didn't take kindly to one of his experiments causing so much trouble.

K- Tala….He reached out to Tala trying to think of something else to say but Tala was already off in his own little world, trapped by his haunting memories.

T-…the next few months were such a blur, I can barely remember them. But I do remember being confused. I kept trying to kill myself and I couldn't figure out why Boris insisted on keeping me alive. I guess he got fed up having to revive me at least once a week so after about a year of that he told me that Voltaire had taken you back because he wanted to make amends with his family. He told me that you told him to tell us that you were dead so we wouldn't be jealous. Trust me I wanted to believe him. You have no idea how bad I wished that you were happy somewhere with your family because I couldn't take knowing that I would never see you again and it was all my fault. But I always knew you weren't. I knew you wouldn't abandon us like that. But then you showed up at the tournament in Russia. I was torn. I was so happy that you were alive and okay but at the same time I hated you. I thought that Boris was right. You left us so that you could go on with your life. That first time I tried to talk to you, you didn't even remember me. You didn't remember any of us. Seeing you again and knowing that you didn't care about me enough to remember me hurt so bad. It felt like my heart was shattered all over again. That was the last time I tried to kill myself. It wasn't like the other times I tried to kill myself though. Before I guess I was just trying to make the pain go away but I always prayed there was a way for us to be together again but that was first time I truly wished to die. There was almost nothing that could save me then. If Boris hadn't done that weird infusion thing on me I would be dead.

K- Tala I didn't know.

T- I know you didn't know and I know that you would never willingly forget us or leave us. I know that you weren't whisked off to some magical life or anything. I just didn't know how to say all this until just now. I still don't know if what I'm saying makes sense. I guess the most important thing I'm trying to say is I'm sorry. For everything. For not helping you, for doubting you, for what I said to you before, for pushing you to Ray, for everything I've ever done that hurt you.

K- What am I supposed to say to that? That I forgive you? You know I do and you know I never blamed you for anything. Had you tried to do something then you would have ended up dead or worse yet, stuck with me. At least we all made it out alive and intact for the most part. And I love you more than my own life, you know that too. But do you just expect me to welcome you back with open arms and forget all about Ray? I can't do that to him. Especially not after last night. Do you know what that would do to him? He would think I was only with him for sex.

T- Why were you with him in the first place?

K- You know me better than anyone else. You should know the answer to that. Ray was one of my first real friends outside of the Abbey that had nothing to do with either Boris or Voltaire. The only reason I agreed to go out with him is because I really, really like him. That being said, I can't hurt him like that.

T- I know you don't want to and I'm not asking you to. I just thought it was time that I told you how I feel. The only thing I really need to know is do you love him as much as you love me?

K- No. Not even close.

T- That's all I need to know. That's more than enough to keep me happy until you decide who you want to be with.

K- But what if that's not enough for me?

He kisses Tala

K- What if I don't want you to go?

He kisses him again

T- I don't want to go either.

This time Tala leans in first

T- I need you.

K- So stay with me.

T- But what about Ray?

K- I don't know. I'll deal with that later but for right now let's not think about that. Just love me.

T- I do love you.

K- And I love you too but you know that that's not what I meant.

This kiss was longer and deeper and lasted way longer…

TBC

A/n: this is not the last you've heard of me mwuhahaha. No seriously I have at least 2 or 3 more chapters to go.