Oh I am mean! Nightmares, memories, diaries and friendliness. Okay, the first three are bad, the last one (at the end :D) are good. I have asked my good friend Deana (guilt trips for when she reads) to read this... and as usual Afroza-IX and XTimeGirlX (: When Dodgy comes back she gets a shoutout too! (And I so just gave her a shoutout anyway) Please like this chapter, it's probably the only one that will be at a reasonable time from now on. (Hey, being an insomniac has its benefits)

Martha pulled back first, her heartbeat racing in her chest and suddenly her rational shields snapped down. She could not allow her emotions to rule her any more so she shut down completely. She dithered in front of him, wanting nothing more than to fall back into his arms and cry her heart out on his shoulder, cry so that he listened to how she felt. But she didn't; instead, she turned and walked briskly into her room, tears pouring down her face as if she were standing in a rainfall. She reached her room and shut the door, leaning her back against it and sliding down, resting her forehead against her knees. She wrapped her arms around her legs so that she was in an upright foetal position. There was a slight tap on the door and she jolted.

'Martha? Are you alright?' She was aware that she had made a noise when she had leaned against the door and she stifled a sigh.

'I'm fine. Goodnight.' Tears were pouring ever faster down her face and she pressed all her weight (which wasn't much) against the door as he pushed the handle down. 'Shouldn't you knock first? I might be changing.' There was silence on the other side.

'Sorry.' He walked away; she could hear his footsteps going down the short corridor and into the adjoining room. Her eyes closed fractionally and she wiped her tears away with her sleeves, hoping that this would be the last time she would cry. She crawled to the bed and changed into the thin pyjamas John had taken from her room in her own house and curled up on the covers. She lifted her diary from under the pillow where she had placed it earlier and looked it over, fingers tracing the thin, spidery handwriting on the inside cover. It was from her mother on the last year of her life, when the cancer had spread through her body and she could barely breathe on her own. She had handed it to Martha on her last day in the hospital, the leather book bound with a coil of gold ribbon. Martha had taken it, her eyes springing with tears and her mother had closed her hands over Martha's, her eyes closing. Then there was a long beep as the heart monitor flat lined. Tears sprang in her eyes as she ran from the room to her boyfriend at the time. She shook her head, clearing the muzzy fog of memories in her brain and looking at the plain white wall in front of her. She picked up the biro she'd been writing with and started scribbling furiously on the page.

John read my diary. He said he didn't but he did. There are some marks on the pages from tears that aren't mine. He had no right but at the same time I'm not angry with him. I know I should but I'm not, I don't blame him even though it's irrational not to. I should have been honest with him, told him the truth from day one… maybe this would have never happened if I had. He really cares and the hardest part for me is understanding why and believing he does. I haven't had anyone for years, not since mum died… A tear dropped onto the page and she wiped it away with her fingers. I need someone like him to be my friend, but this stupid attraction for him is not going away which is, I guess, why I'm so closed and cautious around him. I want to stay in control around him; I don't want him to see me cry even though he already has. I don't want him to see me being pathetic. I'm his boss for Christ's sakes. It could have been anyone else who found me… but it was him. I guess he cares. I don't know what to believe though. Damn it… I just want answers. Maybe find out about him too, find out what makes John Bloom (if that is his real name) tick.

Sometimes though… I just wish my head and heart would agree with each other.

She closed her diary and sighed, tucking it under her pillow and laying down, covering herself with the thick duvet. Her insomnia wasn't troubling her that night, so she fell asleep quickly.

She was dreaming, but it was so vivid, so real. She was floating in the open ocean, the salty water rising up and covering her as she tried to stay above the water. Her hands were numb and the clothes she was wearing were dragging her under, despite her desperate efforts to keep her head in the air. Something brushed past her leg and her nerves instantly snapped, her pulse sprinting and her senses heightening. She tried to look around but the constant battering of water was pulling her further down into the icy, inky water. Something tugged at her foot this time and she ducked under the water, terrified of what she would see. There was nothing, but when she surfaced she saw something that made her blood freeze. A fin. The night was still. The silvery stars bright in the sky. Somewhere, in this serene landscape, she was going to die. The fin disappeared underwater and something tugged at her foot, this time dragging her under. She tried to scream but water rushed in. She tried again with what remained of her breath.

Screaming…

Then Bloom's hands were on her, and her arms were around his neck, breathing heavily, taking comfort in his familiar scent.

'Shh… Martha it's okay, I'm here, shh…' He soothed her, stroking her sweaty hair with his hand and holding her as she shook. 'Shh…' She let herself, just for once, let her guard down and kept a hold of him, her entire body trembling. 'It was just a nightmare, you're okay.' He told her, as if he were soothing a young child.

'I was so scared.' She whispered, resting her head on his shoulder and letting him hold her steady. 'It was so scary…' He was holding her tight and she slowly took her arms away from his neck, instead placing them around him. After a few minutes, the reality of what they were doing seemed to sink in and they both let go, Martha curling up in a ball on the bed.

'You gonna be alright?' She nodded and he leaned down and placed a gentle kiss on her forehead. 'Goodnight Martha.'

'Yeah.' She said, her voice shaking as he left. 'Night John.'

Review and feed the plot bunnies... Just a lot of good old fluff here xD Please enjoy (: