This chapter is similar to the last one, only this time it's taking you through the two years that passed while the Jonas Brothers were in New York, Miley and Nick being broken up, and as they return to California, as seen in ClaireBear536's "Backwards and Forwards." Enjoy!
X-X-X-X-X ::: Chapter 9: Back to the Future
Late February/Early March of 2011
Miley woke up the next morning, not quite wanting to remember what had happened the day before. Her eyes were swollen and puffy from so much crying, but her tears were renewed as she once again recalled the fateful conversation between her and Nick.
"I think we should just hold off...for a while at least," she replied quietly.
"Hold off? Like break up?"
"No...I don't know. I just think we should take a break and just see what happens..."
"If this is really what you want, I guess..."
"It is," she said slowly.
She let out a small sob, grateful that her college roommate Lauren wasn't here to see this. She and Lauren were friends, yes, but things beyond the normal, shallow conversations about classes and school were uncomfortable and uncharted territory. Miley thought to call Kevin - he always made her feel better when it came to Nick - but it was early afternoon in New York, so he was probably busy. She couldn't call Lilly or Oliver, she knew they just wouldn't understand. Miley suddenly regretted not making a few more friends, maybe someone who could understand...Olivia. Miley couldn't believe she hadn't thought of this before - Olivia had gone through almost the exact same thing Miley was going through now, and the girl had ended up being like an older sister to Miley...perhaps she would have some pearls of wisdom.
Miley fought her tears, attempting to pull herself together as she dialed Liv's number. They were pretty good friends - after all, they were next door neighbors, and they were both dating members of the same family. She didn't pause to wonder if Liv was working or in class, she was just so desperate for comfort. This was the sort of thing a mother would help with.
"Hello?" Olivia answered, her voice rendering Miley back to sobs. Olivia made her think of Joe, who made her think of Nick...
"Miley?" she asked in a worried tone. "Honey, what's wrong?"
"I...I...I..." Miley was unable to form the words as a fresh wave of sorrow engulfed her.
"Ok, don't move, babe. I'll be right over - are you at your dorm?" she asked, and Miley could hear her gathering her things.
"Y-y-yea." she stuttered, not bothering to ponder why Liv would be in California instead of New York with Joe...and Nick.
"Ok, give me ten minutes." she said, hanging up before Miley had a chance to respond. Miley was relieved with the silence - maybe now she could compose herself before Liv made it. Exactly ten minutes later, as promised, there was a knock at Miley's door. She opened it without a second thought, her composure flying out the window as Liv quickly wrapped her arms around the younger girl. Miley let everything go, crying freely into Liv's shoulder as the older girl gently scooted inside, closing the door with her foot. Liv slipped her heels off so that she wasn't a good half a foot taller than the other girl.
"Shh, it's ok, hon." she said gently, holding Miley tightly. "It's all ok."
"I-I-I th-think I-"
"Don't worry about explaining right now, just calm down." Liv said softly, moving Miley to her bed, sitting beside her. Miley tried to stop the crying, but it became increasingly harder. Panic gripped her chest as her breathing quickened instead of slowed, her heart beating erratically.
"Hey, hey there. No hyperventalating." Liv said, pushing Miley's shoulders back and her back forward so that she was sitting up strait. "C'mon girl, focus on breathing out for me. Just breathe out..." she continued in the same mollifying voice. Miley was soon able to find a normal pace of breathing, the grip around her heart releasing.
"There we go. Here, munch on this while I make some coffee." Liv said, whipping a half package of cookie dough out of her purse. Miley didn't question, she just took it, picking off small bits without really eating much. Liv was over at the coffee maker, measuring the right amount of water and grounds to make enough for the two of them. She allowed the silence, and Miley was so glad that someone was not forcing her to talk for once. A few minutes later, the two girls were sitting across from each other on the window seat, Liv claiming that sunshine was good for the soul. She never asked Miley what was wrong - she knew that she would say something when she was ready.
"I think I broke up with Nick." Miley said a good half hour after Liv had arrived. Liv hummed, stirring her coffee idly.
"What makes you say 'think'?" she asked, still using that gentle, motherly voice. Miley stared into her own cup, sorting things out in her head.
"I told him that I thought we should take a break." she said slowly, but then suddenly rushed to explain herself. "It was just so difficult on me - he was never available, and I'm trying to get used to not having the Hannah life anymore, and I just really needed him to be physically with me and he wasn't and I just couldn't take it-"
"Shh, babe, it's ok." Liv said, patting Miley's hand. Normally Miley thought it was odd that Liv used pet names on most everyone, not just Joe, but right now it was precisely what she needed. Well, she needed her mother - but Liv was practically the next best thing, besides Mrs. Jonas. "You don't have to justify yourself to me." she added.
Miley let out a long breath she wasn't aware she was holding. "It was just so hard, you know?"
"Yea, yea I know." Liv whispered, looking down at her lap.
"How did you do it?" Miley asked, an almost pained tone in her voice. "How did you and Joe make it work?"
Liv sighed and gave Miley a sad smile. "I can't really help you there." she said apologetically.
"What? Why not?" Miley asked, suddenly getting angry, her emotions seemingly riding a rollercoaster.
"Because it isn't the same situation, darlin'. I'm not you, Joe isn't Nick." Liv explained patiently. "In fact, the only similar thing is that it was a long distance relationship. And it was tough - believe me, it was tough." she paused, shaking her head. "But the reality is, you need to do what you feel you need to do. You're in a huge transitional period of your life - you're no longer overly busy, you've begun college, and your best friend-slash-boyfriend has just moved away while all this is going on. You've got to take this time to -- hold on, sorry." her phone had begun ringing.
"Hello?" she answered.
"OH MY GOD!" Joe yelled.
"Hi to you too, darling." Liv said sarcastically.
"Did you hear about Nick and Miley?!" he asked, and she could tell he was not happy.
"Yes, but I can't talk right now, Joe." she said.
"But-"
"Not now, hon." she said pointedly.
"But Liv-"
"Joe. I will call you back later, ok?" she said shortly. "I'm sorry dear, but I'm right in the middle of something."
"Ugh. Fine." he said frustratedly.
"Love you." she said quickly, hanging up the moment he said "You too." She turned her phone on silent before going back to Miley, who was staring into the sunshine, oblivious. "What was I saying?" Liv asked.
"'You've got to take this time to...'" Miley repeated dutifully.
"Oh, right. You've got to take this time to 'find yourself,' so to speak. Basically, take some time to get to know yourself and how you tick. It's not going to happen quickly, and no matter how much I love Nick like a brother, he knows as well as I do that you're going through a huge change. He wants to be there for you, I'm sure he does - and I'm going to warn you now, he's only human. He's going to want to comfort you - you're the girl he loves!"
"Why does this have to be so hard?!" Miley groaned, putting her head in her hands. "Things were always so easy when we were younger. I just wish we could go back to that."
"We all do. But life is hard, and life is pain - anyone who says differently is selling something. (1)" she said, offering a small smile.
Miley frowned, suddenly not feeling as comforted. "I guess...I just don't know what to do. I didn't want to hurt Nick in any way, but I know he's hurt, and Joe and Kevin probably hate me right about now..."
"You can't worry about them, hon." Liv said urgently, taking Miley's hand. "You've got a lot of growing to do before you're ready to be with Nick again - if you ever decide you are ready to be with him. Nick's a big boy, and he cares a lot about you, so he's going to trust your judgement. He truly loves you, and I believe that you truly love him - it's just not the right timing, that's all." Liv said. Miley nodded; this seemed reasonable.
"And the brothers...?" she asked, the question hanging. Liv gave a soft laugh.
"If Joe gives you any trouble, ever, let me know and it will be dealt with accordingly." she said. "I can't quite speak for Kevin, though. I can call Jess if you want me to."
"No, I never really worried about Kevin. It's just...Joe and I have never had the best relationship." Miley explained. "I've always felt as if he didn't like me."
Liv's face softened. "He does like you, I know he does. I think he's just very protective of Nick, you know? He's seen him go through heartbreak before (2), and he just doesn't want to see it happen again. Well, I'm assuming all of this, he hasn't flat out told me before."
Miley nodded, accepting the answer.
"But seriously," Liv said, looking in her eyes. "he can get a little out of control sometimes - if he hassles you, let me know, cause he shouldn't."
"Got him under your whip, have you?" Miley asked wryly, giving a smile. Liv laughed again, rolling her eyes.
"I wouldn't go that far." she said, getting up. "Now c'mon, let's get you dressed."
"Where are we going? I don't really feel up for going out today..." Miley protested, not moving from the window seat. Liv pulled her up roughly.
"We're just going out for brunch. Now c'mon, put on your favorite dress and the cutest heels you've got. It'll make you feel better - trust me." Liv explained, opening the closet doors.
"What about you?" Miley asked, referring to the simple button down Liv was wearing over her dark jeans.
"Well, you are going to loan me your second favorite dress that matches those shoes." she answered, gesturing to the heels still haphazardly laying by the door. Miley laughed, deciding that maybe going out might not be such a bad idea.
---
Early March
Life had become rather scheduled for Miley as of late. She would go to school, do her work, and go out with friends predictably and periodically. However, life was a different story in New York City.
"Dude, Nick, c'mon - we're gonna go out and get some food." Kevin said as Nick passed him in the hall. Nick lifted his head, looking almost like a shell of his former self.
"Nah, not today, Kev." he said slowly as Joe was exiting his room.
"C'mon, Nickster! We're going to your favorite Chinese place!" Joe said enthusiastically.
"Just not today, ok? Bring me some takeout or something." Nick said defeatedly. Joe and Kevin shook their heads as he walked away - they knew that he wouldn't even eat the takeout.
"Dude, something has got to be done about this." Joe whispered angrily to Kevin. "He won't eat, he won't work - I mean, we had to do the encore by ourselves last night! That isn't right!"
"He isn't sleeping either, he's always up even later than I am." Kevin whispered back. "But I think we should probably just let it run it's course - we don't know the entire story, you know."
"But we know enough!" Joe insisted. "Liv keeps saying that Miley is doing 'just fine'! Why does she get to be just fine when Nick is like that?!"
"Seriously, Joseph, just let it go." Kevin said.
Joe made a noise of frustration. "But what are we supposed to do?!"
"Nothing. This isn't our battle, Joe." Kevin said, his tone holding a warning.
"Kev, we can't just sit here and not do anything - our brother's freaking dying or something!" Joe said, his voice a little above normal volume.
"You've just got too much energy. Let's go play some Guitar Hero and you'll be fine until Olivia comes over." Kevin offered. Joe sighed.
"I'll be there in a little bit." Joe said, walking into his room and closing the door. Kevin shook his head, giving up.
"Just don't do anything you'll regret later!" he yelled through Joe's door - but Joe was already dialing Miley's number.
"C'mon, answer your freaking phone..." he whispered as it rang.
"Hello?" Miley answered, a little bit hesitant.
"What are you doing to my brother?!" Joe had to contain himself from yelling.
"Why Joe, so nice to hear from you." Miley said sarcastically.
"Seriously, Miley. I've never seen him like this and it all leads back to one place - you."
"I can't control that..." she said quietly, which only made Joe more angry.
"Um, yea you can!" he said, his tone mocking. "You could...I don't know...not break his heart!"
"Joe, I don't want to talk about this. It's not any of your business anyway."
"Like frick it isn't my business! I've gotta be around him every day! He's never been this low and I can't take much more of it. It takes me and Kevin almost an hour to get him up in the morning, and even then it's nearly impossible to get him to do something! Do you know how difficult that is when we have a million places to be and a million things to do all at the same time? I mean, we've had to cancel some stuff cause he 'just wasn't up to it'! Last night Kevin and I had to do the freaking encore by ourselves cause we couldn't get him to go back out there!"
"Oh..." was all Miley could say, her breath rushing out of her. How could Nick let this interfere with his career?
"He's too freaking heartbroken to even write songs about heartbreak!" Joe said, his voice raised.
Meanwhile, downstairs, Kevin let Olivia in through the front door.
"Hey Kev, where is he?" she asked brightly. Kevin was unsure whether to send her up, but figured that if Joe was making an unwise decision, it should be brought to his attention.
"He's upstairs in his room." he said with a smile, planting himself back on the couch.
"Ok, thanks!" she said, her heels clicking on the tile floor as she walked across it. She almost jogged up the stairs, but upon reaching the top felt that something was wrong.
"Well aren't you the saddest little girl in the world." she vaguely heard Joe's voice coming through the door, sounding more cruel than she had ever heard him before. She couldn't quite make anything out until she opened the door. His back was to her and he was clearly very upset with someone. She leaned against the doorframe, her anger starting to build as she realized who he must be talking to.
"That's because you have no way of defending yourself." he said, still very angry. "You blew it and you know it!"
Liv heard the other person say something before hanging up, Joe making a frustrated noise and tossing his phone on the bed. He turned around, his angry face quickly changing at the sight of her.
"Hey, you're early!" he said, coming to greet her with a hug. She stood with her arms folded across her chest, her expression unchanged.
"Who was that?" she asked innocently enough - but there was definitely an underlying warning.
"That? Oh, no one, just...uh..." Joe tried to think of a cover story; he didn't want to tell his girlfriend that he had been yelling at one of her friends.
"I'm not stupid, Joe, so don't try and lie to me." she said coldly, closing her eyes and bowing her head. "Why were you yelling at Miley?"
Joe exhaled loudly, a bit of anger ebbing its way back in. "Have you seen Nick lately?" he asked rhetorically.
"Yea, and he's not looking too bueno." Liv said shortly. "So you were yelling at Miley because...?"
"Because she freaking broke my brother's heart! And she's not even sorry about it! She's just over there in California acting all cool and being like 'I'm great! La la la!" Joe said angrily, thinking Olivia would be with him on this. Instead, she began pacing, angrily running her hand through her hair.
"Joe, why would you ever do that?!" she said, trying her best not to raise her voice.
"Me?! Why don't you ask her the same question!" he retorted, this conversation not going like he wanted it to.
"She's trying her best, Joe! She needed some time to herself, it's an honorable thing!"
"'Honorable'?! She's-"
"I wasn't finished yet!" Liv interrupted. "She's going through the biggest transitional period of her life! She needs to be worrying about becoming herself right now, not trying to be what everyone wants her to be!"
"So the new self doesn't include Nick?" Joe asked.
Liv made a noise of frustration. "She...ugh, nevermind, I can't talk about this to you right now." she said, quickly walking out of the room. Joe's heart began racing in fear as he followed her out.
"No, c'mon, tell me what's going on-" he said. She turned around abruptly, stopping him in his tracks.
"I can't handle being around you right now, Joseph." she said, cold and in control. Joe's anger disappeared completely, replaced by remorse and worry. He stood in the hallway, shocked, as Liv angrily walked down the stairs. He didn't start going after her until she was almost to the door - which she closed before he could make it out.
"Oh my God." he said, gripping his head and pacing frantically. "Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my-"
"Dude, shut up, House is on." Kevin said from where he was still watching TV.
"Kevin! Oh my God, dude, you've gotta help me! I have no idea-" Joe ran up to his older brother, but was interrupted by Kevin holding up his hand.
"I can't dig you out of this one, Joe. This one's all you." Kevin said shortly. Joe blinked, staring in disbelief, and suddenly feeling quite alone. He numbly turned and went back up to his room, falling onto his bed and staring at the ceiling, hoping and waiting for the moment when Liv would call. He laid there for hours, late into the night and early in the morning, but he didn't move a muscle. His phone was in his hand - he was ready, and he was sorry.
The lights around him slowly turned off, and even Kevin and Nick had wandered off to bed when his phone finally rang.
"Hello?" he answered eagerly.
"Hi." she said softly, obviously much calmer than when she had left. They were both silent for a minute before she spoke up again. "I just...I couldn't sleep because things aren't okay between us."
"Join the club." Joe said, attempting to say it lightheartedly - but it came out halfheartedly.
"It's just...you weren't there whenever it happened. She was an absolute mess, and I can tell that she really hasn't done a lot since then besides sweep all that mess under the bed so that she appears ok." she explained.
"I'm sorry I yelled at her. Nick's just been so...yea, you've seen him. And it's tough for me to watch my little bro go through that and know I can't do anything to help him." Joe shed light on his side of the story.
"But did you really think that getting mad at Miley was going to help?" she asked softly, and he could tell that she wasn't accusing anymore, she was trying to understand.
"It seemed like a good idea at the time...in retrospect, not so much." he said.
"You've just got to realize that she really has so much going on inside her - she doesn't need the added stress, ok?" Liv said pleadingly.
"Ok, I understand now." Joe said submissively. And he did understand - it was just quite difficult to not be angry with the girl that was making your brother's (and, incidentally, your) life a living hell.
"Alright, well I've got to go to bed now." she said, and Joe jumped in during the pause.
"But we're ok, right? We're still together and all?" he asked, worried.
"Yea, as far as I know. Why wouldn't we be?" she asked, and he could tell that she was a little confused.
"Oh, um...just making sure, I guess." Joe lied, not wanting to tell her how most everyone thought he was going to screw up this relationship sooner or later.
"Ok. Well, I love you." she said, and she meant it.
"I love you too." he responded, also meaning it. They hung up, and Joe drifted off to sleep, phone still in hand.
Back in Liv's apartment, sleep was no where in sight. Actually, she was still on the phone.
"I'm so sorry, dear." Liv told Miley. "He had no right."
"You don't need to apologize for him, Liv." Miley said. "He's a big boy and should take responsibility for his own actions."
"I know, I know." Liv admitted. "But still...are you okay?"
"Yea, I'm okay." she responded. "Still a little shaken, but it's cool. I'll get over it just like every other fight I've had with him."
"I hate to say it, but you fight with my boyfriend like an old married couple." Liv said, and Miley laughed.
"We can't help it." she said. "For some reason, it's like we have to fight. Like, we can get along for a little while, but then something happens and we hate each other all over again!"
Liv laughed appreciatively. "Alright, well if you're okay, then I'll just let you get off to bed. I'll talk to you later?"
"Yep! Bye, Liv."
"Bye, Miles." Click. Now that everyone was appeased and taken care of, Mama Liv was finally able to go to sleep.
---
November, 2012
Joe danced into the house with the rest of the Jonas clan, excited about the deal they had just made.
"We're going back to California!" Kevin sang.
"What!" Nick added.
"Back to California!"
"OH!" Joe put in his two cents, but there was a question lingering in the back of his mind. A couple hours later, Nick had gone for a walk and Kevin was...well, Joe didn't quite know where Kevin was, but he was bound to turn up sooner or later for dinner. Joe took the opportunity of the semi-empty house and called Liv.
"Hey, can you come over?" he asked when she answered. "I've got some news."
"What kind of news?" she asked skeptically.
"Just...news, I guess." Joe responded.
"Ok, well I get off work in ten minutes, so I'll be there in twenty." Liv answered.
"Right-o, sounds good!" Joe said. They exchanged quick goodbyes before Joe began planning what he was going to say.
Twenty-five minutes later, Mrs. Jonas let Olivia in, telling her that Joe was up in his room. She went up, wondering what was going on, only to find him pacing around his room.
"I'm getting deja vu." she said, recalling all those years ago when she had received her acceptance letter to NYU. "What's up?"
"Oh good, you're here." Joe said, kissing her cheek and resuming his pacing. Liv slowly walked in, taking a seat on the edge of his bed.
"What's going on, Joe? You're freaking me out." she said, looking sideways at him.
"It's just..." he tried to start, made a few weird gestures, and finally just took the plunge. "We're switching record labels."
"Ok, that's a good thing, right?" Liv said after a moment.
"Well, yea, but..." he stopped.
"But what?" she asked, getting a little tired of the guessing game.
"It's based back in SoCal." he said bluntly. Liv jerked a little bit, as if she were shocked, but her expression didn't betray any emotion.
"Well that puts a damper on things." she muttered sarcastically to the floor. She moved her startling blue eyes up to his dark ones. "So what are we going to do?"
"Well, I mean, I know what I want to happen." he said quietly, not quite sure he intended for her to hear.
"Ok, tell me." she said, turning to him expectantly as he sat down next to her. He looked back at her, obviously not wanting to. "Oh, come on, I went first last time."
Joe sighed. "Well, honestly...I love you. Like I really honest to God love you, and I don't want to have to separate again." he said seriously, feeling a lot lighter now that it was out in the open.
"Ok, good, we're on the same page." Liv said, her eyes smiling. "But I'm going to say right now, that long distance thing nearly killed me."
"So what do we do about that?" Joe asked slowly, laying back on his bed and rubbing his face with his hands. Liv leaned on her hand, sitting up next to him.
"Well..." she started, playing with a loose thread on his tshirt. "If you're as serious about this as I am and as I think you are...I'll move back to Cali with you."
Joe sat up abruptly. "You would?" he asked, his face happy. He suddenly shook his head. "I mean, uh, what about school, and work and all?"
Liv laughed. "Well, I can transfer to school over there to finish my last year, I can quite my job and get one there, and I can sell the apartment." she said. "It'll take some time, but it can be done. I just need to know that our relationship is serious enough for me to do that."
Joe reached one hand behind her head, leaning forward and kissing her soundly. "When it comes to us," he said, resting his forehead against hers and whispering against her lips. "I am always serious."
Liv smiled, kissing him again. "Well then, I suppose I need to start getting all that in order." she said.
That evening, Joe was even more lighthearted than usual, and more excited than he should have been for their move back to California.
---
Late March, 2013
It took almost four months for Liv to arrange everything to be able to transfer back out to Malibu. Her mom and Tyler were, of course, ecstatic, but no one was more excited than Joe. They day her flight got in, he almost ran to the airport himself because he was so excited, and by March, everything was as it should be. Nick and Miley were back together, Jess and Kevin were getting pretty serious, and Liv had gotten all settled in.
"Lucy, I'm home!(3)" Liv called jokingly as she let herself in to the Jonas' house.
"Hey, I thought I was Ricky?" Joe said, greeting her with a hug and a kiss on the cheek.
"Alright, fine, you can be -- holy moley that's a huge piano!" she said, spotting the big black Steinway in the Jonas' living room. "When did you get that sucker?"
"A couple weeks after we moved in. Took forever to pick one, even if they all look the same." Joe said as Liv lightly touched it.
"It's so pretty." she said with the fascination of a five year old.
"Do you want to play it?" Joe asked, laughing at her childishness. And she said he needed to grow up!
"I don't know how - I was always to busy playing sports to pick up an instrument." she explained.
"Well I'll show you!" Joe said, sliding onto the piano bench. He patted his lap. "Sit here." he said cheekily.
"I'm not so sure I can trust you." she said, looking at him suspiciously. He held up his hands in innocence.
"No ulterior motives, I promise." he said as Liv slid onto his lap. He placed his hands on the keyboard in front of him. "There, now put your hands on top of mine."
Liv hesitantly laid her hands on his so that their fingers lined up perfectly. "Check." she said.
"Alright, ready?"
"Ready, captain!" she said, and Joe began to slowly play the first random song he thought of, her hands following his precise movements.
"See? Not that hard." he said.
"I'm basically a puppet." she quipped, but seemed to enjoy it none the less.
"But a very cute puppet." he said kissing her neck.
"Joseph!" Mrs. Jonas called from the doorway to the living room. "Are you making wise choices in there?"
Olivia started laughing and Joe hung his head.
"Oh, awkward." was all he said.
X-X-X-X-X
(1) - Quote from, of course, "The Princess Bride"
(2) - Supposedly, Nick wrote "S.O.S." from an experience that he had.
(3) - From the TV show "I Love Lucy." Every day her husband Ricky would come home saying "Lucy, I'm home!"
eh, not my fave, but it'll do! as per usual, leave love and anything you wish to see! peace out!
