Here, have a chapter. I must be the strangest writer ever. Or, just a very opportunistic one. Since my exams are well spaced out (about 7 in about 6 weeks) I'll have lots of time to work on this story. Study? Who said that? *pelts shoe at person*
Anyway, so, like with Sometimes Heroines Need Heroes, you can expect that you'll get most of the chapters for this story over the next 6 weeks (which, in case you didn't know and weren't following it when it was on-going, most of it was written/posted during exam period May/June—actually, I think that was when it was started, to boot). Not so sure for after that when I'm on vacation. Without stress and the nagging feeling that I should be doing something else, I may have limited juice to write.
Exams are going rather well…not that anyone asked or anything. But, hey, since you guys tell me stuff about yourselves, why not tell you some of my business, right? :D No? You just want the chapter now? Okay. Here you go. Going away now…
Despite the fact that I was running on no sleep, I went to rugby practice and then I got ready for school as usual and endured the whole experience without managing to fall asleep in anyone's class. Typically, when I missed out on sleep, I would skip lunch and sleep through the hour but today I had a mission. I spent my lunch period starting putting the sequins on the skirt. I'd managed to get both the top and the skirt stitched during the night and about half the sequin work on the top. Tonight, I was going to have to get everything else completed. After I made my way from training and rugby practice, I met Stephen at his apartment on the other side of town to bring the stuff down to Thomas' store. After the stuff was safely in his store, Stephen and I went to the park next to school to try to figure out what the grand plan was.
After we straightened out all the details of the plan, he headed home, tired from his band practice that he had just come from prior to my arrival and I headed home as well.
I found dad on the couch playing Halo: Reach.
"Hey, dad."
He paused it and turned to me. "Hey, sweetheart." I approached and kissed his forehead. He gave me a tight hug. "How are you?"
"I want sleep but I've got other things to be doing. But I should be asking you how you're doing. You must be tired."
"No, I slept all day. Why are you tired? What happened?"
"I had to spend all of last night making Tanya's outfit for her show tomorrow."
"Oh. Well at least you can sleep it off tonight."
"Ha. I've still got a lot of sequin work to do tonight. I think I'm going to sleep all day Saturday."
"Aw. Poor baby. I hope Tanya repays you for this."
"It's a labour of love, dad. Besides, I get a free model out of it. Someone's bound to ask her where she got her clothes and then she'll redirect them to me."
"Well, I hope that pans out. Why don't you go grab something to eat and we can multiplayer?"
"Sounds really tempting dad but unfortunately, as once put in a cryptic and dark poem, 'I've got promises to keep and miles to go before I sleep'."
"Robert Frost."
"Very good, dad."
"I was good at Literature once. And then I fell in love with a nurse and switched specialties."
I laughed. "That's not what happened."
"Maybe not, but the part about me being good at Lit is true."
"Alright, dad. See you in some hours."
"Alright, sweetheart. Be safe."
"I'll try."
I went into my room, changed quickly, put my eye mask in my back pocket and started to leave my room. Jason intercepted me in the hall.
"Out again tonight?" he asked.
"Yeah."
"Thought you said you'd be home tonight."
"I said I might."
"Do you have to go out?"
"Are you concerned or just nosy?"
He hesitated before shrugging. "Both."
"Well, I don't have to go out but I should so I will."
"I think you should rest tonight. I know you were up all night."
"You weren't sleeping well last night either," I took in his garb, jeans, leather jacket, tee-shirt, "but you're going out, too. I could hear you tossing and turning from down the hall."
"Why are your ears so sharp?"
"The house was dead quiet. I'm surprised January didn't hear it."
"Yeah, but your sewing machine was going so you shouldn't have heard me tossing and turning."
"Why are your ears so sharp? My sewing machine is one of those ultra-quiet ones that only makes a faint whirring noise."
"I'm a bad guy. I know how to listen for trouble."
"Why are you listening for trouble in our apartment? Were you expecting some?"
"No, but I'm a paranoid nutbag as you once so gracefully put it."
"Where are you going anyway?"
"To see my mom."
"And then you're coming straight home?"
"You still don't trust me?"
"I'd be an idiot not to check up on you. I mean you do still technically work for the other side. We've got to talk about that some time later, by the way. Hey, where's my mom?"
"She went to the store with your sister. You home tomorrow?"
"Nah. I've got plans with mom and Tanya."
"Tanya...That's your new best friend, right? My replacement."
I slapped him on the arm. "Do not call her that. She's not your replacement. It was only a matter of time before we became friends."
"Alright, alright. What time are you coming back in?"
"I'm not sure. But if you're back and up by the time I'm in and you want some company, feel free to come into my room. I could use some motivation to make sure I don't fall asleep."
"No, you don't. You're one of those people who would bulldoze a wall with your fists if it meant keeping a promise. You wouldn't fall asleep because you're too dedicated to making sure you don't break a promise. That's just the kind of girl you are. You're so dependable that it might be dangerous for your health."
I shrugged. "The way I see it, that's a complement."
"It is." He started to walk off and after I pulled my door closed, I followed.
"Later, dad."
"Bye, sweetheart," he replied, not looking away from his game. I shut the door behind us and turned in the direction of the ascending staircase, heading off.
"Hy." I turned.
"Yeah."
"About your boyfriend."
"Ex."
"Yeah, ex. How long were you guys together?"
I scoffed. "Nosy or concerned?"
"Both."
"Like, five months."
"Wow. No wonder it tore you up when things fell apart."
"Okay, firstly, I wouldn't say it tore me apart but it made me feel really bad, and secondly, things didn't really fall apart. I think."
"Sounds like you're missing answers."
"I am."
"Why don't you ask him?"
"I'd rather not bring it up. And, the kind of relationship we have—or had, depends on how you want to look at it—when we wanted to tell each other something, we did. He didn't so I guess it just wasn't something he wanted to say to me, for whatever reason."
"That's bullshit, you know. You shouldn't accept that. He's a stupid bastard for throwing you away like that and a bigger dumbshit for letting you go—"
"You're not in any position to talk about him like that."
He stared at me in silence for a moment then shook his head. "My God, you're in love with him, aren't you?"
I rolled my eyes. "So just because I don't let you trash talk him, I'm in love with him?"
"No, your whole approach to this screams 'love'. You're too accepting and too interested in making him comfortable when you should be feeling angry and rejected and animosity towards him for it to be anything but love."
"Hey, I do feel rejected. I just won't stress myself out feeling those other things that will just poison me from the inside out."
"Anyway, like I was saying before you cut me off, it's bullshit for you to accept whatever lack of an explanation and damn respect he left you with. This relationship wasn't just about him. It was about both of you and he hurt you so you should at least get a straight answer as to why he did it—Hold on. This just occurred to me. I remember you jumped in front of Red Arrow when Cheshire threw a dart at him. Is that it? Were you dating Red Arrow?"
I half-smirked. "Nah, I wasn't dating Red Arrow. We're just...comrades."
"I see. What is wrong with you? You don't just jump in front of people randomly—"
"That's what heroes do, Jason. We risk our lives for the safety of someone else. Anyway, there's a funny explanation for that one. Maybe I'll tell you sometime."
"Sure, but what I really want to know is who the hell you were dating."
I chuckled. "It doesn't matter, Jason. Trust me, it doesn't matter."
"Of course it matters. I'm mad that he hurt you enough that you changed into a girl who loves silence and is all clinical and busy all the time. And I'm mad that he was there for your birthday and for prom and for whatever else you got to experience in the five months that you were together and I was miles away being an asshole and losing you to someone who couldn't appreciate you."
Jason was practically starting a whole sap fest in front of my apartment door and I didn't know how to react. He was practically telling me that he was upset that it was Robin there at my side, in my embrace, kissing me, and not him. I wasn't too sure if I fully believed that Jason loved me in the way my parents loved each other, but I knew that he had always seriously cared about me and I suspected that he was clinging to the crush he had on me when we were younger. Or perhaps now that we were around each other again, it was being revamped by the new us being around each other.
"You should get to the hospital. Visiting hours tend to be rigid and some of the nurses aren't very accommodating to latecomers."
He chuckled. "Fine, brush aside my admission and change the subject. The Hyacinth I knew dealt with things head on. This isn't over."
He started walking away first and I stayed where I was for a moment, wondering if I should have just tried to say something else to him. I sounded like a coward for changing the subject on him like that—it didn't even remotely sound like I didn't want him to miss seeing his mom. It would have sounded that way if we were talking about what we should get for dinner or something else just as inconsequential but this was one of the rare moments when Jason was being straight up, honest and serious with me and I just blanked him.
I shook my head and started up to the roof. I would deal with him later. If he said it wasn't over, that meant there would probably be another time for me to try to deal with the situation better.
In the middle of my usual run, Batman's voice patched through my communicator, calling us all to base. I changed my course and ran there as fast as I could. When I got there, I was amazed at the fact that I was not on the verge of collapsing. All the training and rugby had been working. I was more agile that I had ever dreamed I'd be. And I'd lost about an inch or so, too. That part, I wasn't so hot about. I liked my size just the way it was. I also would have hated to need to get new clothes.
After grabbing myself a glass of water, I assembled with the others who were making their way in and received the briefing. The mission was simple. We had a little recon to do around a warehouse in Fawcett City where Sportsmaster was spotted, and Captain Marvel was going with us since he was familiar with the city.
Our trip was pretty much in silence and I passed the time looking out the window at all the city lights and by going over in my mind what I had left to do with Tanya's outfit. I was lost in a reverie of random thought of which I was not too sure its composition. My mind just thought things as my eyes looked at the trees and the parks and the people and the lights and the buildings everywhere.
"Hyacinth!"
"Huh?" I replied, whipping my head towards Kaldur who had just called me. Based on the volume of his call, he'd been trying to get my attention for a while but I'd been too lost in thought to hear him. "Sorry."
"What is with you lately? You seem very...pensive."
"Have I been giving off that pensive vibe a lot?"
"Yes."
"No wonder he noticed," I muttered to myself.
"Who?"
I shook my head. "Uh, what were you saying when you were trying to get my attention?"
"I was asking what the situation with Jason looks like."
"Um, well, he's been seeing his mother a lot, which is to say he's still in Happy Harbour, but I'm not too sure what his plans will be like afterwards. So far, I don't think he's been doing anything suspicious so it's looking good."
"You have been seeing him a lot?"
"Yeah, everyday," I half-mumbled, rolling my eyes. "I'll talk to him tonight and let you guys know what's going down."
"Alright."
"It would probably be a good idea to call him instead of going where he is. It's getting kind of late," Robin commented.
I snickered humourlessly. "Oh, yeah, don't worry about that." I wondered if I should mention to them that he was staying with us but I just shrugged and decided that it wasn't yet necessary information.
When we got there, Kaldur divided us up into pairs and sent us off to explore the warehouse. In my estimation, the mission seemed utterly boring and it felt as if Batman had sent us on the mission for no other reason than to just send us somewhere to do something. Robin and I were put together as usual. I wasn't going to make a problem of something that was tactically sound. There was just something about our fighting styles and tactics that just meshed well.
We were outside, on the roof on the lookout to make sure that there was no trouble. To make sure the perimeter was well watched, we split the roof in half and patrolled a half each, leaving barely any window at all for there to be any incomers that we didn't notice. Conner, Captain Marvel and Kid Flash were outside, on the ground, checking the area and Artemis, Kaldur and Megan were handling the inside. The warehouse being rather small in perimeter helped a great deal but Kaldur had informed us that there were five floors inside non-inclusive of the roof so there was a lot to search. I wondered how long we would actually be there. I needed to get home in time to finish off Tanya's outfit because I needed to do any last minute adjustments at lunch. Whenever she had a show, she would leave either during or after lunch to get in some extra practice, make sure her costumes were well arranged and fitting and that she had everything she needed. Therefore, I had to get it to her before she left because after school our schedules got extra-busy. I had already told my rugby guys that I would have to miss practice tomorrow but training with the team wasn't something I thought I could afford to miss, especially after I had been out of the country for three weeks.
The silence of the night was tainted by all the city noises but it was charming in a way. It was reminiscent of the fact that civilisation was a noise-maker in and of itself because civilisation meant progress and striving towards that goal which meant hard work and noise. The noise wasn't always bad. Sometimes, it just got a little irritating because there was so damn much of it.
"Hey, you look like you're a million light-years away when you should be here. What's up?" Robin asked.
"I'm tired, is all. And when I get tired, it's like I'm on some kind of drugs. I start thinking all kinds of crazy thoughts that aren't really crazy. And the moment I stop doing something or thinking about something, I crash. Which, given our present circumstances, I can't afford to do."
"Were you sleeping when Kaldur called?"
"No, I was out on patrol."
"Maybe you should have had a rest instead."
"No can do. Got things to attend to."
"Like?"
"This, plus I've got to finish an outfit for Tanya for tomorrow."
"How come?"
"She's got a show tomorrow and she decided that instead of going to the mall and buying a new dress, she would get her best friend to make her something absolutely fantastic, free of charge."
"Isn't that bad business to be doing things like that pro bono?"
"Yeah, but that's only when you're already in the business. For now, I'm using her to advertise. At least one person's got to ask who did her clothes and then she'll refer 'em to me and I may get a customer."
"Good strategy, I guess, but still a little extreme for advertising."
"Yeah, I know, but it goes a long way to have someone wearing your clothes well. Someday, I want to make a gown for Wonder Woman to attend some sort of auspicious function. That would be the crème-de-la-crème of advertising. Amongst all the super elite wealthy, she would catch jealous eyes and get me so much business that I'd practically die of happiness. And even though I find it kind of extremely stupid that those people buy these thousand dollar dresses that they never wear again, it would still be spectacular to make a dress for these people. Their dresses are often so extravagant and daring and I love that about high fashion and it pays so well that I think I'd be able to stifle my horror that they'd only see the world once. But, since these people are the higher ups, I take comfort in the fact that when they're seen, their clothes will get a lot of attention, too."
"Sounds like you're trying to get an awful lot of attention."
"That's what fashion is about. And I want to strike the right balance among the different facets of fashion. I want to make clothes for the everyday girl going to school and the businessman who needs to be comfortable in his suit all day long and the movie star going to her premiere and the guy going on his first real date. I want to make the clothes that are affordable on the average person's salary and the gowns that have four or more zeros attached to them. I know the only way I'll be able to do that is to get attached to a famous design company which is why I'd love to get the attention of Giovanni Perchaine. In some ways he's like my idol but I think these days he needs to revamp his works and I can do that for him." I looked over at him and noticed the somewhat amused, somewhat concentrating look on his face. "And, crap, I'm rambling again."
"Nah, I wouldn't say it's rambling. You just know what you want."
"You could call it that. Very P.C."
"It's not politically correct. You were actually talking about something, not just mouthing off on whatever comes to your head. You've got this very clear cut vision and it's beautiful. I kind of wish I knew if things would work out in ten years for you."
"I'd like to do it in four if I can."
"Well, there ya go. You've got focus and it's admirable."
"Thanks."
There was some silence for the next two cycles on the roof. It occurred to me that we were back to this place where I told him everything about myself and got almost nothing in return.
"Hey, Cin, I want to ask you something."
"Yeah?"
He seemed to hesitate for a moment but he got past it. "How have things been since Jason came back into town?"
That was a question I wasn't expecting him to ask so my brain blanked out for a second. I pursed my lips briefly. "What do you mean?"
"Like, I knew he had told you how he felt about you and I imagine it must have made things a little bit awkward between the two of you."
Somehow, it felt as if the conversation that Jason was trying to have with me earlier was coming back to haunt me. What was it about these two particular guys that just got to the heart of whatever it was that I didn't want to have to handle and threw it in my face? How come they always seemed to ask the right combination of questions that were so difficult to try to skirt around?
"Well, it's not as awkward as you imagine."
"You're getting comfortable around him again, aren't you?"
I shrugged, trying not to feel like I was guilty of whatever his accusation might have been, if there even was one. "It's kind of hard not to. I've tried holding a grudge but it occurred to me that I'm the only one who's going to die faster if I do that. He's explained himself to me and, while I'm not saying that he was right to do what he did, I don't think I have any right to completely condemn him anymore. He's here. He's agreeing to become our spy. He's really trying to turn things around and well, that's more like the overall good guy I knew he was, even if he was a little bit delinquent back then and still is now. And since I'm around him so often, the idea that he's really not someone who belongs in the villain column keeps getting reinforced. For me, he's just...so easy to be around."
"Yeah, how come you see him so often? Is he always at the hospital or something? Then again, you're never at the hospital, really. Is he staying near to you guys?"
"Yeah, real close."
"Where?"
Oh, he was getting real curious. I kind of wondered why he needed to know all the fine details but it occurred to me that Jason was one we needed to keep tabs on and I couldn't blame them for wanting to know so much about him. He was still technically the mob's tactician. I grimaced at no one and nothing in particular. "With us."
"In your apartment?"
"Yes."
"Your mother's letting him stay there with you guys?"
"Don't be so shocked. She would let you stay over if you wanted. Remember, she knows Jason for a long time and it wasn't uncommon that he stayed over. When his mom had to work late, he would stay with us and that was usually once a month. That was just the way things were between our families: he would stay over by us and I'd stay over by them, even if we were right next door to each other. We were so close, like, I think a lot of couples weren't as close as we were. He's my mom's son as much as you are. No, much more than you are, but only because she's had years to get to know him. In a time like this where he hasn't got any place to stay, really, and while he's not with his mom, she wouldn't just let him fend for himself. She takes care of people. That's what she is."
"Yeah, but are you okay with having him so close?"
"I'll get back to you on that."
"Not sure yet?"
"It's...complicated."
"I thought you said life is only complicated because you make it that way."
I glared at him. "Must you pay such close attention to the things that I say?"
He chuckled. "Yes. It's fun to put you on the spot. And speaking of spot..." He gestured with his head and I looked in that direction.
"Uh-oh. We've got company." I touched my comm. "Cin to team. Incoming, nine o' clock."
I was expecting Kaldur to give us some further instruction but before he had time to even respond, I noticed something bright and noisy headed in our general direction.
"Look out," I shouted as I threw myself on Robin to shove us both into a corner where we would be less likely to get roasted or dismembered by the RPG headed in our direction. It exploded with a big boom. I could feel the bruise forming where my side had contacted with the concrete of the roof's wall.
"Mother—"
"Robin to team, taking fire up here. They brought RPGs with them."
"Acknowledged," responded Aqualad. "Make your way down to us. Artemis and Miss Martian are still inside searching so we've got to hold them off."
"Jason to team."
I froze for a second, wondering where, why, what. He had a communicator so I already knew the how.
"We're kind of busy," I responded.
"Then I don't need to tell you that there are guys coming your way."
"You sent them? They're freaking RPGing our asses!"
"They just called me and told me that they found someone interfering with one of our warehouses and I told them to go check it out. I didn't know that they were that close and what they were packing. Sorry for trying to save your lives by telling you."
"Warn us earlier next time!"
"I only just sent off the order five minutes ago!"
"Like I said, warn us earlier!" Robin nudged me, signalling that we needed to get off this roof now. "Look, I'll kick your ass later. Right now, we have to humanely dispatch your friends."
"We're not friends—"
I cut the connection and Robin took me by the waist and we jumped off the roof and headed down a rope through the window on the fifth floor. Artemis was at a window, helping Superboy, KF and Aqualad and Captain Marvel on the ground outside to deal with our company with RPGs. Robin and I split up to continue searching the grounds. It seemed like there weren't many guys outside but they were just packing some heavy artillery.
As I was searching a cabinet marked 'Hospital Files' caught my attention. I immediately thought of the hospital where Aunt Laila was being kept prior to her secret transfer. The drawer was locked so I quickly rectified the situation by using one of my needles to coax the lock free. Originally, my lock-picking skills had been limited to doors but recently, in my attempts to occupy my life enough to forget how much I missed and loved what I could not have, I had spent an awful lot of time researching how to pick all kinds of locks. The scary thing was that I found so many online sources. Learning to pick a file cabinet was one of those things I had learnt online. It was the first time I was trying it and I frowned when it worked. The Internet was a dangerous place with lots of knowledge on it that shouldn't even be public.
I quickly perused the tabs attached to the files until I found one with the name of the hospital attached to it. I grabbed the file which was relatively large and tried to figure out how I would manage to sneak out of there with the file, assuming that I would have to fight at some point.
"Aqualad to team. We got one of their men but once he was captured, the others made a run for it. It would be best to retreat before they return with reinforcements. Head to the Bioship."
I did a quick sweep around the room with my eyes for anything that looked like it would be noteworthy at all and found nothing which looked very obviously important. There were an awful lot of files in the cabinet but a lot of them seemed to be profiles on people and files on their group's past missions which would probably not be of any help to us at the point we were at. I met Robin in the halls and we started out of the building together. On the ground floor, I noticed that there was a rather large space cleared, as if it were for something they were planning to move into there. I wondered if the RPGs that they had spent their time firing at us were originally supposed to have gone into storage, which would have explained why they were so close to the warehouse in the first place and how they managed to get here so quickly after realising that it wasn't the cleaners in the warehouse.
We got into the Bioship and were away in moments. Perhaps it was because we had been forced to pull out so quickly, but all the members of the team were very quiet on the way back to Happy Harbour. I pulled out the folder from where I had stashed it in the waistband of my pants and started to read through the file. I hadn't read very much but already, the gist of the information seemed to confirm what Batman and I were both suspicious of. The hospital that we had relocated Laila Francine Guerreton from was mob-owed and a racket operation. Everything about what happened to Aunt Laila and Jason since their move had been planned.
It occurred to me that we were playing with some seriously smart bastards here. Whoever it was running the League of Shadows was a force to be reckoned with. I shuddered. I wondered if his intelligence level was on par with or even surpassed Batman's. Either way, it made what we were fighting look even more daunting.
After the quick debriefing with Batman, I handed the folder over to him. The knowledge would be better handled by the League. In my hands, it just made me mad.
By the time I was ready to head home, it was eleven thirty and I was exhausted and the bruise given to me by the wall I encountered trying to not encounter the RPG throbbed in tandem with the bruises and muscle sores that rugby had given me earlier that afternoon. My body longed so very much for sleep but I knew I had to suck it up and fight it because for all the bad guys I fought every week, I just could stand to let Tanya down. Since I was still in my suit, I had to enter my apartment building from the roof and then go down to my home. It was very, very quiet and dark. Everyone was in bed already. I was expecting Jason at least to be awake but when I peeked into his room, he was already asleep bareback on the bed. I smiled. Defenceless in sleep, he was the guy I used to know again, the one whom I had once had a very big crush on. But he was gone and we both knew that. And the me who had ever had any sort of romantic feelings for him had moved on as well, becoming as defunct as the girl I had been when I was five years old.
Doing sequin work when you were exhausted, in pain and your mind was in a congealed, warped mess was difficult. I persisted, motivated by the end. Tanya was going to be on the receiving end of some very bad words later on in the day for not having warned me sooner that she had wanted an outfit and for choosing such a labour intensive design. As Courage The Cowardly Dog so aptly put it, "The things we do for love".
