"Did you see him yet?" Conner asked as he leaned over the counter.

"Yep." Sophie replied, staring blankly at the cocktail that her best friend had prepared. The murky swirls of bright blue water were endearingly similar to his eyes. The daunting presence of Josh's very existent romantic life loomed over her thoughts.

Josh.

He had set fire to her fading heart with just one piercing glance, and it was entirely unfair.

"Uh-oh." He muttered out.

"What? What did I say?"

"That's the problem, you didn't say anything." Conner pointed out as he crossed his arms and turned briefly to observe his best friend who was now slinking in her seat. He didn't want to jump to conclusions, but it was pretty clear that Sophie was everything but okay.

Sophie rolled her eyes. Conner always had a tendency to be a little too dramatic. "You want to hear the truth?"

"Every ugly part of it." He confirmed.

"We drove together in complete silence, and he dropped me off without even as so glancing in my direction. It was as if he was rushing me away."

"He might have had other things to take care of?" Conner offered

"That's what's worrying me." She admitted sullenly. "His priorities were always-"

"You?" Conner asked nonchalantly without even looking up from his work.

Sophie blushed ever so slightly. "Did you talk to him when he came in yesterday?"

"I think we might have said a few words to each other when he came down to help me out." He added sarcastically.

Conner was one of the few people who were always strongly against them being together. He himself had a few run in's with 'love' to know that it never stuck around to play. When his two best friends told him that they were together he was happy for them, but that happiness lasted only for a few seconds. After reality sunk in, he had secretly wished that someone would throw him away with their friendship that was already making its way out the window. Breakups eventually happened to even the strongest of couples. Still, it tore him up after seeing how distant his two best friends actually were after the breakup.

"Could he have possibly… I don't know… said anything about me?" She asked as nonchalantly.

Conner raised his eyebrows in amusement. "It might be possible."

Before he knew it, Sophie had climbed over the counter and grabbed him by the collar, a fierce fire in her eyes. "Tell. Me." She gritted through her teeth.

"Down… down girl-"

"Conner. I'm serious. You need to tell me. What did Josh say?"

"I would tell you, but it's kind of hard to say anything right now with you literally breathing down my throat."

Sophie let go of his shirt collar as quickly as possible.

"Thank you." He said as he patted down the ruffles that were made in his uniform. "He asked if you were coming home for the holidays, I told him that I didn't know because I really didn't know. Just on the side note, you should call before you abruptly decide to travel across the country to spend the holidays with us."

"Did he say anything else?"

"There might have been moment where I did kind of question if he was still over you…" Conner's voice was thick with hesitation.

Sophie's eyes widen with excitement as her heart started to flutter with hope.

"There was this party that happened last night. It was supposed to be a party only for the ski lodge guests, but I helped him sneak in."

"You guys sneaked into a party?!" She asked in exasperation.

"Hey! What else was I supposed to do? My best friend was in college and the only relationship that he was in was with his high school niece's best friend. And even that was a pending relationship! With a high school student! She's not even legal yet! Being the righteous friend that I always am to him, I provided him with an opportunity to spread his wings and fly away."

A sunken feeling overtook her. It felt like her insides had bypassed green and was turning black. "So who did he fly away with?"

"See, there were these smoking hot twin blonds who were totally coming on to us, and Josh seemed to be okay with them joining us anyways so I invited them over to our table."

"How?"

"Oh… well they went like this-" He said as he grabbed the counter and did a little shimmy that could never be mistaken as a wave. "And then they did something like this-" He said as he ducked and started to shake his butt.

"No!" She exclaimed in disgust as she covered her eyes. "I mean how did you know that Josh was okay with them?"

"I asked him." He said simply as he got up. "He did that thing with his shoulders; I took that as a yes. I even let him have the better looking of the twins and my boy still couldn't make it to second base!"

"They're twins Conner; they're supposed to be identical."

"Shhh-" He said seriously as he put a finger to her lips as he started to look around. "Don't let Sherrie hear you say that."

She pushed his finger away. "So what happened after that?"

"I don't know. They seemed to be having a good time before I left with Sherrie. I thought they were really going to hit it off but-"

"But-?"

Conner's mind flashed back to a couple of nights before. He really thought that his friend was having a good time. It had been months since he had seen his best friend laugh with a girl like he really meant it. Josh had even seemed okay with Hailey touching his arm while they were talking. That was the reason why he had decided to leave the table; he wanted to give his friend some space to spread his wings and fly away.

That last thing he could ever expect was seeing Josh towards him after only 20 minutes of being alone, shouting that he had to be somewhere else.

"Why?" Sophie asked after hearing his explanation. "Did something happen?"

"The day of the party was December 17th." He said dead set serious.

Oh. A rush of relief hit her hard as she staggered to keep her calm. December 17th was the day, the first day that they said 'I love you' to each other.

It was a Monday, the day that Josh had finally published his story in the school newspaper. The News Crew didn't allow articles written by freshmen to be published in the school newspaper, but apparently Josh's investigative piece on 'The Health Conditions Concerning the School Locker' was a hit. She precisely remembered how proud he was of himself as he came bounding down the halls towards her, the goofy smile she came to love plastered so bluntly on his face. It was an unexpected pleasure when he took her hand and led her to an empty classroom, so ready to tell her his big news.

'You were the first person who came to my mind when I heard the news, so I wanted you to be the first one to know.'

'Me and not Conner? I'm flattered.' She joked.

'I couldn't tell Conner.' He said suddenly serious.

'Why?' She asked even though she knew the answer. She held her breath and his he leaned forward.

'Because I wanted to tell you first. You are always be the first person that comes into my mind.'

They had promised to go back to that exact spot they said those words to each other every year. It was their foolish way of trying to prove to the universe that their relationship was going to last. She didn't keep her end of the promise this year. She couldn't. She was thousands of miles away.

"You need to let him go Sophie. He hasn't been exactly the same ever since you broke things off with him." Conner said suddenly very serious.

"What if I don't want to?" She heard herself say.

Conner hesitated. "What are you trying to say?"

"I want him back Conner. I want my best friend back in my life again."

"You should have thought about that when you broke things off with him! What do you expect him to do? Go back running into your arms once you tell him that you want him back? Because news flash, he's not going to do that." But even as he was saying it, he wasn't so convinced.

It was because he knew Josh and Sophie, he was there to witness the beautiful mess of a relationship they had shared. He was never going to admit it, but he envied what they had shared. He had saw how much they cared for each other, and how perfectly they fit with one another. They shared a past that only strengthened their present and ensured a future. There was no way that his friend could be completely over that so easily.

"I have to try."


Josh left Maya's room in a rush, strangely gulping for air. It was only then did he realize that he was holding in his breath the whole time they were having that conversation. His body, once tense with confused emotions, started to unreel. By some miracle, he managed to find his way into his bedroom in one piece. However, just as he was about to plop down on his bed, a foreign lump that was staring up at him overtook his senses.

"My Brother!"

Corry Matthews said as he peered at him from his bed. Corry was wrapped in blankets with his head and curly brown locks popping from the creases of the blanket.

"Corry!" Josh said as he took a step back from surprise. "What are you doing in my bed?"

"I thought mom and dad told you about the sleeping arrangements. Topanga and I are going to sleep in your room while you are supposed to sleep in-"

"Sleep in?"

Corry burrowed his eyebrows in frustration, "I forgot."

Josh groaned as he sat on the edge of his bed, careful not to sit on top of any parts of his brother. "Great. That's just great."

"I sense that someone's a bit frustrated. What's wrong?" Corry asked attentively.

"What's wrong? Oh, I don't know. Maybe the fact that my ex-girlfriend just comes popping into my life as if our breakup didn't happen might be what's wrong. Oh, no. Wait. That's not it. Geeze, I don't know. Maybe it could be because Riley and her friends think that I'm a jerk for playing Maya and now Maya thinks so too!"

"I'm sure Maya doesn't think that."

Josh groaned as he buried his face in his hands, "You should have seen the way she looked at me when I was talking to her. It was the first time I felt like she wasn't listening to me."

"Did you explain everything to her?"

Josh looked up. Corry's eyes were silently probing his. His big brother might seem childish at certain points, but times like these; Josh could really feel the age gap between them.

"I- I don't know."

"Josh. You're my brother and I'm here for you, but Maya's also like my daughter. I'm going to admit. There are some times when I see her with you and I question-" Corry faltered.

"Question what?"

"Question if you really need to keep her hopes up like that."

Complete silence overtook the room. Josh felt so lost, his intentions so misplaced. It was like he was surrounded my misunderstandings that were threatening to drown him if he made another bad move. It was hard to stop from drowning when all he had left were supposedly "bad moves".

"I- I don't want her in my life. Not right now anyways."

Corry's glance towards him still stood silent and free without judgement. "Is that because of Sophie? Do you still have feelings for her?"

"It's hard not to have any feelings left for your first serious girlfriend. Don't we all?"

Corry let out a small laugh, "Not for me. My first serious girlfriend was the girl I started dating in the second grade. She was the first girl to ever give me half of her peanut butter and jelly sandwich. The only serious feelings I have left for her is curiosity on where she brought her peanut butter from because it was a really good sandwich."

Josh snickered, "Must have been some sandwich."

"Must have been really something, you and Sophie."

"It's over now."

"Then why not Maya? Because of the age difference?" Corry asked.

Josh felt the truth slide into his mouth and fill his mind with temptation. He was so close to the truth, all he had to do was spill it out. It was his sanity that was holding him back. He wasn't going to just spill it out a secret he had worked so hard to keep just because his brother told him some cheesy story about his first serious girlfriend.

Yet. It was a good story…

What the heck. "Because I don't want to make the same mistake I did with Sophie. I don't want her to come into my life when both of us know deep down the timing isn't right. Chances are if we start anything, sooner or later, she's going to go off to college at least a thousand miles away from me and things are going to end. And-"

"And?"

"I'm not even sure what I feel for Maya. Whenever I'm with her, it's like I'm swept up in her whirlwind of emotions. Whatever she's feeling, I'm feeling too. She has the effect on me. How can I be so sure that what I feel for Maya is love?"

Josh felt Corry's hands pat the small of his back in reassurance. "My ignorant little brother, you're never going to know if you continue to pull up your guard whenever she's around. Go with the flow, ride whatever emotional wave she takes you on, and if you like where you both land then-" Corry tossed the rest of his hopeful statement up in the air hoping that his little brother would catch them before they fell.

Josh's eyes widened. "You want me to give Maya a chance? Like a real chance?"

"All I'm saying is that you're never going to know if Maya is the one when you continue to block her out. Let her in, and just see where she positions in your life."

Before Josh could ask anything more, Corry let the room in a hurry at the sound of Topanga calling him from downstairs.