Steven ran down the stairs when he caught a whiff of syrup and milk. "Ohhhh yes! Pancake fest!" he cheered as he hopped up onto the banister and slid down the slick railing. "Steven smells pancakes!"
Pearl was at the stove and she made a face at the overpowering scent wafting from the sizzling cakes. "Oh, the syrup is even more intense then the cakes themselves. Steven, how can you eat this stuff?"
The boy ran into the kitchen, and stars sprung to his eyes when he saw the unenthusiastic forms leaned against the counter. One Homeworld gem was turning dials on the stove to figure out what they were, one was checking out the fridge, and the largest one was biting at the pancake box.
"Jasper!" Pearl hissed. "You're getting powder all over the counters." She huffed and brushed at some of the flour on her arms. "What's in the pan is what you're supposed to eat."
Garnet was reading the paper. "Don't be too hard on her Pearl. We can always use a back up garbage disposal." She looked over as Amethyst bit a plate. "In case the Amethyst gets broken."
"Oh man!" Steven ran over to the table, practically bouncing. "You're all out of your rooms! Yay, it's a mega together breakfast! This is SO awesome!"
"This is so...boring," Jasper drawled, her face wrinkled in disdain. She wanted to be out on the battle field, or at least mutilating something. "You all just sit around ingesting things?" She hoped they tasted better then the cardboard. From the corner of her eye she spotted Peridot curiously leaning in to the burners on the stove and tugged her back by her collar. "Whoa there, Peridork. Don't touch the unknown earth crap."
"We mostly cook these things for Steven," Pearl said as she served the large group the pancakes. She made a face as Amethyst smashed her face into the syrup and made a slurping sound. "And...Amethyst."
Steven shook a bottle of whipped cream and topped Peridot and Jasper's pancakes with it, sprinkling on some cut strawberries. "This is whipped cream and it was created by the milk god to make everything ten times more delicious."
Peridot looked over at Garnet. "You have a deity that supplies you with dairy products?" She lifted the paper higher over her eyes. Jasper shovelled an entire pancake into her mouth and chewed thoughtfully, white foam around her mouth.
"Not terrible..." Her tongue played at some of the cream in her mouth. "Strange textures. This white stuff feels like a cloud." Steven giggled. She smacked her lips together and gave a crooked smile. "It's good. Hey water princess, try it out."
Lapis's eyes were hard enough to cut glass and she daintily popped a piece of the cake into her mouth. The next one she dipped in syrup. It was like that for a while; the soft chewing of pancake and steely glares—and the occasional grabbing Peridot before she dismantled all of their appliances.
"Sooo...what are we all going to do today?" Steven broke the silence, grinning from gem to gem. They all looked at each other. Jasper had Peridot trapped in her lap. Garnet put down the paper.
"Actually, Pearl, Amethyst and I are going on a mission." Steven's eyes sparkled but she shot him down instantly. "Unfortunately, Steven, we can't allow you to accompany us on this one. I know you hate when we do this to you, but it's too dangerous."
"We're going on a hunt for a gem monster that we've been on the hunt for since before you were born!" Amethyst grinned. "The thing only rears its head up every hundred years. It's one of the big ones we haven't managed to catch yet."
Steven looked disappointed but Jasper immediately sprung up. "Wait, monsters?! Oh yeah!" She laughed and pumped her fists in the air. "Something to kill? Sign me up!"
"No." Garnet shook her head. "Not this time. Perhaps in the future you four can assist us. Besides, I'm sure Steven wants to show you around town."
Jasper's face fell into the ugliest scowl. "Great..." She slumped heavily into her arms as the gems rose and put their dishes away, starting to the warp pad.
"We're going to leave them with Steven?" Pearl whispered to Garnet, her eyes wide. Garnet nodded. She looked over at Lapis. Lapis's devotion to protect Steven was just as strong as their own. If the other two even thought of trying anything, it would be pointless. "Steven can handle it. Steven, we'll try to be back for dinner." They disappeared and Jasper kicked over the table.
"Uhhh..." Steven giggled nervously. "Hey, I bet we can put that violence to good use in some video games!" Jasper kept glaring at him. "You get to kill stuff!" The gem's face lit up like a kid on Christmas.
"Alright, I'm game for that." The three remaining gems followed the child up the stairs, nothing else to do. They watched, confused as Steven went over to a strange box-like contraption, and then pressed a button on an even smaller box-like contraption. The screen flickered. There were stars and a little pixelated space ship.
"A ship!" Peridot shouted. "Is this some sort of communication contraption? Are you trying to get in contact with another ship?"
"Are we gonna destroy it?" Jasper asked gleefully. Steven sighed.
"No guys—it's just a video game! It's meant for fun. It's, you know, a way you can beat things up without actually beating anything up." Jasper did not look impressed, but the graphics and tech was enough to interest a technology addicted gem like Peridot.
"Interesting. So it's a sort of simulator then?" She mashed at buttons. A smile lit up her face when she caused the floating meteors to explode as she struck them. "Success!" She gave a crazed laugh. "You minerals are no match for my advanced weaponry! What else can I do? What else can I destroy?" She kept firing at the asteroids and hissed as one of the computers booted up, giving her an extra opponent. "FOOLS! Do you think I fear you? Die, die die!"
Lapis was searching through Steven's set of games. She pulled up Animal Railroads. "I like the look of this one." There was an octopus character. "We saw these often as Malachite. Can we play this next?"
This was too much for Jasper and she gave an angry roar as she stormed down the steps, ripped off the hinges of the door and stalked outside. Peridot was far too intrigued with the video game to notice, ad Lapis of course didn't care. So it was Steven that ran outside.
"Hey Jasper, wait up! Umm, the stores are gonna be open soon and when they are I can take you!" Jasper didn't slow down, so neither did Steven. "Wanna swim? Trust me, it's a lot more fun when you...uh, aren't a prisoner at the bottom of the sea." She still didn't stop, and Steven ran up and grabbed her arm. "Or hey, we can-"
Jasper smacked him off, and the force of it really stung. He cradled his pinkened hand as he fell in the sand. "Just LEAVE ME ALONE!"
Steven was taken aback and he just stared at her. "I was just..."
"Well don't 'just!'" Jasper mocked. "Except to just—leave me alone! Why don't you go play with your stupid human friends or go play that stupid game with Peridot and BUG OFF?!"
Steven rubbed his hand, lower lip trembling. He climbed to his feet and when he did, he was glaring. "Don't call my friends stupid! Why do you have to keep being so mean? Especially to me? All I've ever done is try to help you! I saved you!"
"I didn't ASK to be SAVED!" Jasper screamed. There was a hint of pain to her voice. "Why do you think I released the damn fusions and destroyed the panel?! I knew I was going to die, I wanted to die! That was the point! I just wanted to get Peridot out of there—and I spared you! You could have thanked me by giving me what I WANTED!"
"But why'd you come back then?!" Steven demanded. "You coulda stayed in your gem but you said you came back for Peridot 'cause she needs you! And she definitely does! She almost electrocuted herself trying to play with the toaster and see how it works!"
"If she's alive then that's all that matters to me!" Jasper snarled. She kept stalking away. This time Steven skidded in front of her, and the gem bristled like a furious tiger. "I've got a lot of violence built up in me, brat! Get out of my way before I TAKE IT OUT ON YOUR FACE!"
"But you can't just leave her!" Steven cried. "How would she feel if you did that? You're all she's got now! And—and your fusions! What about them? They're in your gem somewhere! How would they feel if you just give up?"
"Probably relieved because they finally don't have to SUFFER as me!" Jasper snarled and felt her eyes threaten to brim. She bared her teeth and fought the tears back, trying to get past the child—but he darted in front of her at every chance he could.
"It's okay to be upset Jasper!" Steven cried, still trying to reason with her. "I don't blame you! You have every reason to be! You found out they lied to you and now you're on a planet that's new and scary!"
"It's not scary!" Jasper snapped. "It's just pathetic!"
"But there are healthier ways to release your anger!" Steven told her. "And better then just giving up! There's nothing wrong with being sad, and nothing wrong with crying." Jasper's face screwed up with hate and disgust. "You can let yourself feel sadness!"
"I don't get sad," Jasper hissed. "I get ANGRY and destroy things! If you don't want it to be you then step aside! I've got nothing to lose if those gems go after me..."
"Why are you so afraid to cry?!" Steven demanded. "This isn't Homeworld! You're able to cry here without being judged!"
"I don't cry!" Jasper snarled. "Weaklings cry! Warriors do not cry!"
"I'm a warrior!" Steven stomped his foot. "And I cry!"
"You're no warrior," Jasper sneered. "You're a pathetic little pod of flesh that your mother was stupid to give herself up for." The child stared at her with wide eyes and stepped back as if someone had slapped him in the face.
"I..." Large tears brimmed and his mouth began to violently tremble. "I'm not..." The sobs took him and there was a brief flash of concern before she snarled and shoved the kid aside in the sand, beginning to storm off.
She could hear his wails as she stormed down the beach. She was feeling everything at once. Rage, rage overpowered it all, but she did feel it, hidden under all the self loathing...sadness. So much sadness. Frustration, fear—it all collided.
Jasper paced in the sand, flinging up dirt and rocks as she growled and raged and finally gave a roar of fury as she pounded several rocks into dust. Her back heaved and bristled like a wild animal, and suddenly all at once, voices began to echo through her head.
"How could you say such a thing?" Red hissed. "The child did not deserve that, he was simply trying to help!"
Orange's sneering voice answered, "The brat keeps sticking his nose in where it doesn't belong. I'm glad we finally got to put him in his place!"
"But how could we be so mean?" Yellow crooned sadly, a sniffle to her voice. "He's just a baby... Oh, we made him cry!"
"Good."
"Orange, I have had it with your attitude!" Red snapped. "I get it, you're frustrated. We all are! None of us like to be cooped up in here, and I'm tired of you taking it out on everyone that you can! Just because you can! And now we just made a poor, defenceless little boy cry! That's awful! I'm sick of the way you treat others, and the way you treat us!"
"Well if you don't like it brat, then you can just beat it!"
"You know I would if I could!" Red yelled.
Jasper held her head with a groan, the separate disembodied voices making her head spin. It pounded, everything hurt. She cried out in pain as it felt like something was stabbing her head violently with several needles. "Arrrghhh! It all hurts!"
Suddenly there was a white flash as three small forms tumbled to the ground, into the sand. Red winced and pushed herself up onto her knees with her one arm, staring around. Her crimson eyes went wide in shock. "We're...out."
Yellow reached around and felt the sand between her small fingers. She held Red's arm for leverage. "But how is it possible?"
"It's not supposed to be." Red pulled her up, face etched with fear. "This isn't something we should be rejoicing over. I don't imagine we'll last too long out here." She looked over at Orange, who up until this point, had been silent. "Orange, let's all try to fuse."
"No."
Red and Yellow just stared. "What?" Red asked. "Orange, don't you realize that we'll all die out here? Our gems aren't functional enough to be on our own, that's why we were made into Jasper. We need to get her back! If we don't we won't survive."
Finally Orange turned to them. Her golden eyes glinted with hate and fury. "Good." Red and Yellow just stared. "Then I'll finally be free of you all! ALL of you! Your stupid kernels of wisdom-" She shoved a finger towards Yellow. "Your whines and bawling, and the shameless display we're forced to look at every day!"
The only arm that Red had clutched Yellow close, crimson eyes just staring and trying to see if she heard right. "Orange, we...we've been together for thousands of years! We're all a part of each other—how-how can you not CARE about us? About Jasper?"
"I was never with any of you idiots by choice!" Orange yelled. "All I ever wanted was to just—get away! And now I finally can!"
"But we're going to die!" Red cried, despaired. "If we die there will be nothing left of us to show to the world! It will be like we never existed! You'd do that to us, and Jasper?"
Orange didn't answer. She was too busy running away, small feet pounding up the sand to the only kind of freedom they had. And she didn't care how short lived it was, it was something she was going to revel in for as long as she could.
"Orange, come back!" Red scooped up Yellow, following as fast as she could. Her steps were slowed as more and more pressure was put on their gems, and they both began to darken a slight black. Red's dress made it nearly impossible to run, but she knew they had to get to Steven.
"Red, my chest is hurting," Yellow mumbled, transparent eyes seeming to become dimmer and dimmer. Red clutched her closer with a whimper. "Quartz!" she shouted.
Steven was still at the spot Jasper had left him, sobbing into his knees. He looked up when he heard a voice he didn't recognize, and his tearful eyes widened to the sizes of dinner plates. "Wh—what?" He scrambled up. "Are you gems?!" Then...he took a closer look. "Are you...Jasper?"
Red gave a smile and a curtsy. "It's nice to meet you Quartz boy. I'm Red and this is Yellow. We don't have much time for pleasantries though-"
"Oh man!" Steven's eyes sparkled. "I can't believe I'm meeting Jasper's fusion! This is so cool! You...you're so nice." He rose an eyebrow. "Are you really a part of Jasper? How can that be? She's, uh, not so nice."
"Yes I know," Red said. She stroked the hair on Yellow's head. "Orange is the most dominant part of Jasper. Her feelings, her loathing...it's too intense that it overpowers us most times. It's all Jasper can feel. Orange hates the situation so much, but Jasper never knew that she was a fusion. So all of her anger was always misguided, and misdirected. All she had was pent up rage because of Orange."
"We were upset too," Yellow said quietly. "No one likes to be imprisoned, but we learned to accept it. Orange never did." Suddenly, Red buckled and she fell to the ground in pain.
"What's going on?!" Steven cried. He tried to help the injured gems up but they were so weak they could hardly even stand.
"We're...defected gems," Red gasped softly. "We aren't functional enough to exist on our own. That's why we were made into...Jasper. We can't exist in the physical world like you...c-can..." The alarming tinge of black on their gems was growing darker.
"W-well I can help that!" Steven cried. "I have my mom's healing powers! I can make your gems work!"
Red shook her head. "No Quartz child... It isn't the matter of healing our gems. We aren't cracked. We aren't injured. We were harvested this way. We...we were harvested deformed. You can heal cracked gems...y...yes, because all of the pieces...are there! You can't repair pieces that are missing."
Yellow was face down in the sand, but her soft voice spoke. "Just like...you can't complete a jigsaw puzzle if you're missing the last...piece."
Steven's eyes filled with tears again. "Well I gotta do something! I can't just—let you guys die! I can't let Jasper die! What do I do? How can I help?!"
"We need Orange..." Red said meekly, her voice fading. "We need to become Jasper. If we don't...we won't survive and neither will she."
"Orange, got it. So, we gotta find the mini Jasper still running around. She can't be far, especially if you guys are this sickly." He looked them over, biting his lip. "I need a way to carry you. J...just stay put, okay?! I'll get some help!"
Steven bolted towards the temple and through the destroyed doorway. "Lapis, Peridot! Come quick!"
Peridot waved her hand dismissively. "Not right now, Quartz child! I'm trying to beat the Lapis Lazuli's high score!"
"Jasper is in trouble!" That was all that needed to be said for Peridot to hurl the controller to the floor and bolt down the stairs with a horrified shriek. Lapis however was far more hesitant and stood by the bed, eyes steely.
"Please Lapis..." Tears filled Steven's eyes. "I really need your help." Her eyes softened and after a moment of internal conflict her wings spread, fluttering down next to the child. He gave her a quick hug and pulled her out the door.
"Where is she?!" Peridot was looking everywhere. "Where's Jasper?!" She ignored the pile of sprawled colors in the corner of her vision, until Steven pointed to it.
"That's what's Jasper right now."
Peridot's eyes went wide with terror and she staggered, stunned. "Is that...Red and Yellow?" She ran to them. Long red hair...Jasper's features. Pale yellow skin, a white head of hair. "Wh...where is the other one? Where is Orange?!"
"That's what we need to do!" Steven said, trying to lift the sickly gems. "We have to find her! If we don't then they're all gonna die and we'll never see Jasper again! I—I need help looking and carrying them!"
Lapis and Peridot carefully picked up a gem each. Red was nearly limp in Lapis's arms and Yellow snuggled slightly into Peridot. "W-we don't have much time," Peridot whispered, feeling tears fill her eyes. "Their gems are nearly black."
"We have to start looking," Steven agreed. "And we gotta find her fast." He broke into a run across the sand while Lapis dove into the water to search. "No one came in the temple, right? Did you see her?"
"No," Peridot responded, shaking her head. "We would have heard." She looked down at the blind gem in her arms and tried not to let a tear fall.
"Don't worry," Yellow said softly. "When she talks about how annoying your nerdyness is she actually likes it." Peridot's face went a dark hue of green.
Peridot's face went an even darker green until the jade skin was almost like moss. "Sh—she what? I don't understand."
"And when she yells at you when you cry it's really because she can't stand to see you cry."
Peridot said nothing but she clutched the yellow gem closer and caught up with Steven as he made it to a small cave near the rocky cliffs. Among the darkness, they saw a bright tinge of orange in the dirt, motionless.
"Orange!" Steven shouted. He ran up to the small gem, trying to pick her up. She swatted him away angrily.
"Bug off kid! I thought Jasper made that clear to you...s...she doesn't want...your help!" She raised her voice. "I DON'T...WANT YOUR HELP! Go...away!" The gem shard on her face blackened more. There was hardly a tinge of orange left to the stone.
"Orange please!" Steven pleaded. "You're gonna die if you don't come with us! You'll die...in this cave! I don't want you to die! Neither does Peridot! Or Red!"
"Or me," Yellow whimpered. Peridot set her gently on the ground, but the dying creature fell to her hands and knees.
"Steven!" Lapis came to the entrance, holding Red tightly in her arms. "Did you find her?" She gasped and looked down at the fading gems. Red's flickering eyes filled with tears. "Orange...Yellow..."
"She's right here, but...but she won't fuse." Steven sniffled. "Orange...if you don't fuse then...Jasper is gonna die."
Her eyes were tired, having trouble staying open...but they still narrowed in hate. "I want Jasper to die."
Suddenly it became even colder in the cave as tension hung over them all like a cloud. It was deathly silent as Steven's feet shuffled in the sand. He stood over the small gem and his eyes sharpened in rage. A furious scowl rippled his face as he almost snarled. "DON'T YOU DARE SAY THAT ABOUT HER!"
It was as if a switch went off in the dying gem's head. Orange's golden eyes suddenly snapped wide open in fear. The type that Steven had never seen in Jasper's eyes. Her eyes filled with tears and she suddenly cowered against the ground, holding her arms above her head as coverage. "N-no!" She started hyperventilating and Steven stepped back. "No! Don't hurt me! Y-Yellow Diamond, please don't—don't HURT ME!"
Steven gaped. "What?!" He felt a huge wave of guilt for having screamed at the gem, and when he tried to get closer to her, she desperately tried to drag herself away. "W-wait! Orange, I...I'm not gonna hurt you." Was this what was wrong with Orange? Psychological trauma far deeper then eyes could even see? "I promise I won't hurt you." He bent down next to her and put a hand on her arm. "I'm sorry I yelled. I just...I'm really scared." He sniffled. "I'm scared I'm gonna lose her and...I've hardly even gotten a chance to know her."
Orange stopped shivering against the ground and looked up at him, sniffling. "You don't want to know us. We're a walking monster. We're a living example of how awful our planet can be." She sobbed. "You don't want to know me..."
"That's not true Orange," Red whispered. "We've been with you...for thousands of years. Even though we all resent our predicament...not a day passes that we resent you. Or her."
"I know it's really terrible what you've been through." Steven sniffled. "I can't imagine it. You lived your whole life as a lie, trapped in your own mind where no one could even hear you scream. And I know that's why you're so angry. And why Jasper is so angry... You never had anyone but Peridot." He looked over to the trembling green gem. "It was just you and her against all those horrors, but...you guys were never really alone. You all had each other."
They all looked at each other and he smiled. "You had all three of you, together. And you had Peridot! And now that you're here, you can have even more friends! The crystal gems are all a family." He reached out his hand to Orange, a gentle smile on his face. "Won't you be a part of it...?"
Orange didn't take it. She buried her face in her hands. "You all must hate me." Somehow, with their last reserve of strength the two dying gems crawled over to Orange. They each took a hand.
"We don't hate you," Red said softly as Yellow nuzzled up next to Orange. "We could never hate you... We know you're angry. We understand, and we know you're sad." She squeezed Orange's hand. "But stop pushing us away. We're all one...we should all deal with these feelings...together."
"Besides..." Yellow said quietly. "How are we gonna kick Homeworld's butt if Jasper doesn't exist anymore? Let's be a real fusion. Let's be...Jasper."
Orange didn't say anything, but after a moment, she pulled the two close. Red wrapped her only arm around Orange and Yellow pulled them all close. They started to glow, and the three gems began to form together as one.
Jasper landed on the ground, the stone on her face as strong and together as always.
Peridot and Steven's face broke into large grins and even Lapis gave a small smile. Jasper didn't say anything until Peridot came and stood next to her. She was as smug as a cat.
"So I was told that you apparently like my...'nerdiness?'"
"Shut up."
Steven gave Jasper space the rest of the day, and so did Peridot and Lapis. They knew the gem needed it. She was finally starting to reach the stage of acceptance. It wasn't a process that could be rushed. She wasn't blindly angry anymore and she didn't even pace. She did a lot of sitting by herself though and staring up at the sky and the ocean beyond. Steven spent the day with Peridot and Lapis, showing them all of his video games. The tech was enough to amuse Peridot for several hours, and Steven managed to keep any more catastrophes from happening until the gems got home.
Steven sat on the couch, eating some soup that Pearl had prepared for him (and Amethyst), while he darted his eyes over to the porch. Jasper was just standing there, in the dark. The black sky and silver moon cast on her just made her look even more lonely. Maybe she'd like some company...
"Hey..." Steven said as he creaked open the door. "Garnet fixed the door. Um, I told her it was a mutant seagull. I don't think she believed me."
Jasper didn't turn but she let out a small snort. "Future vision, brat...and that story is just ridiculous."
He came up beside her. "...Are you okay?"
"I don't know," she mumbled. "I guess... better then I was. I feel...like things are a little more clear. I guess I'm...just trying to look at things in a new perspective. It's hard when you've had just one mindset your entire life."
Steven nodded, his head hanging slightly. "I guess...I didn't get that. I thought I was helping, but...I didn't realize how bad you were hurting. And this wasn't something I could ever understand. I'm sorry...I acted like I did. What you said earlier...you were right." His mouth trembled. He was trying valiantly not to cry and failing miserably, as the tears leaked down the sides of his face. "My Mom was the greatest warrior that was ever known. She was so strong, she was so perfect...and I'm just this weak pod of flesh. I can't even do half of the things that are expected of me."
Jasper looked down at the child silently and didn't say a word.
"I'm...worthless." The moment those words left his lips, the world blurred upwards as he was suddenly yanked so violently that his head almost snapped back as his teeth rattled. And he found himself face to face with Jasper. Her golden eyes bored into his soul, so intense that Steven instantly shut his mouth.
"Don't ever..." Jasper began, in a tone very quiet. "...Say that about yourself." Steven just stared at her. "There's a lot of things you are, Quartz kid... I've probably only seen half of them, but worthless is not one of them."
"But..." His voice was meek. "But you said earlier-"
"Forget what I said earlier," Jasper snapped. "I was angry and it wasn't aimed at you. It shouldn't have been. I..." She grunted and her face screwed up in disgust, the words clearly painful to say. "I'm...sorry."
He stared at her, eyes as wide as an owl's. Jasper grunted and dropped him. "Don't lean too far into it." A large smile broke out over Steven's face and he clambered to try and climb into the railing. After watching him struggle for a moment Jasper grabbed him by the pants and plopped him beside her.
"I don't know how you do it." Steven looked at her, and she looked back down at him, face scrutinizing his features. "I don't know how you can be...this. You're so annoyingly cheerful, it's sickening. You just want to be anyone's friend. I tried to kill you!"
Steven shrugged. "Yeah that's okay, the gems accidentally almost kill me all the time. Besides, you're not anymore!" The smile remained on his face, blissful as always. And Jasper just stared at him.
"I think I know why I've hated you." Steven looked stricken and hurt. Jasper's eyes narrowed bitterly. "I used to be your age, but I didn't get a chance to have the innocence that you do. I saw too much, even the first day of my harvest. So much pain, so much devastation. So much...sadness, and loss. You never saw any of that. I hate you because I envy you."
Steven smiled and lowered his head. There was pain in his eyes, of a boy that had seen too much to retain as much innocence as she thought. "You're wrong. I-I...might not have been in war yet, but I've still seen a lot. I've seen a lot of sadness and loss. I...see it every day actually."
Jasper leaned her cheek into her hand, surprisingly attentive.
"Garnet goes off to fight on her own because that way she doesn't have to show the pain. I think that's why she wears her visor sometimes, so no one can see her eyes. Amethyst stays in her room, in a pile of garbage. And she just...eats and sleeps 'cause I think it's the only thing that makes the pain feel a little better. Dad says it helps to fill a hole in her heart. And I bet that hole just got bigger when my mom left." Jasper kept watching him, her expression was less intense. It was...almost gentle.
"Pearl acts like she's okay, but I hear her talking to my mom sometimes through her room. And outside. She uses a hologram to do it. She thinks no one knows, but...we all do. And sometimes when I'm at my Dad's I hear him singing the songs he made for her when I'm supposed to be sleeping. I know they all love me, but they blame me too. They take care of me, but they'll never stop thinking of the person that was supposed to have this gem. ...And doesn't because I'm here."
Jasper was at a loss, and just stared at the child with tears in his eyes and a smile on his face.
Steven wiped his eyes, not realizing they had filled with tears. "I guess I'm always smiling 'cause the gems need me to be happy. They're really broken, and someone has to be strong for them."
Jasper's eyebrows creased in concern and she frowned. "But you're just...a kid. That shouldn't be expected of you. You can't just carry other people's happiness, brat. That's too much on you. You're allowed to be...weak."
Steven looked at her. "I thought you said that weak was useless and stupid."
"It is, but...I think you've gone through enough to be allowed it."
Steven smiled and inched closer. "You have too." He hesitantly rest his head against her side, and after a moment of consideration, Jasper let him.
(A/N: Not much to say here. It's four in the morning and I am tired. I love my baby jaspers so much that I just had to show them again! Personally I feel that the gems would never leave Steven alone with just Peridot and Jasper yet but they know the lengths that Lapis is willing to go for Steven...and they also know their little boy can handle it. ;) I'm aware there's been a horrific lack of city people and especially CONNIE! But that will be remedied soon. As always, thanks for the love!)
