A/N: Steve calls a meeting the day after the previous chapter.
The Opposite of Hero-Worship
"I want to apologize to all of you," Steve Rogers told his friends, who were all outlaws because of his actions — except for King T'Challa, of course.
"Cap, I mean, Steve, we're grown adults. We knew what we were getting into," Clint Barton said firmly.
"Yeah, you told me from the start we were outside the law," Scott Lang confirmed. "I've been there before. I knew the risks."
Sam Wilson just shrugged. "I still believe you were right."
"I think you should can the pity party, Rogers," Natasha Romanoff said. "I signed, and I still chose you over the Accords when push came to shove. I'm a big girl. I knew what I was doing when I tased the Black Panther. No offense, your majesty," she said with a smirk.
"None taken," the king answered with a smile. "Knowing what I know now, perhaps I would tase myself. Do you truly regret not signing?" he asked Steve.
Steve thought about it, then shook his head. "No. The last time I had oversight, I ended up with Insight. That's why I have trust issues," he said, giving Natasha a wink. She and Sam both smiled.
"I can't believe Stark went for it," Natasha said in disgust. "Talk about trust issues! The man has trust issues coming out of his ears!"
"I was surprised you signed," Clint told his longtime partner.
Natasha dropped her eyes. "Well," she sighed. "I could see the Accords were a fait accompli, with or without me signing. I thought maybe I could keep one hand on the steering wheel, but I was wrong. Maybe if Tony hadn't signed, we could have held strong together, but the man who told the Senate to take a hike, was the first to sign."
"He let his guilt control him," Wanda Maximoff said quietly. "I did not try to read anyone's thoughts, but everyone was so upset, you projected at me. I sensed Stark's fear, his overwhelming guilt, and his pain was multiplied because Ms. Potts had left him. He wanted to not be in charge any more. He wanted to hand over responsibility to someone else. He was … tired and sick at heart."
"I wasn't in a good place, either," Steve confessed sadly. "I'd just lost Peggy. I couldn't … I couldn't lose Bucky, too. He was all I had left."
Sam nudged Steve with a sharp elbow. "Hey, what are we, chopped liver?" he joked, trying to lighten the mood and receiving a warm smile from Steve in return.
"You're a good friend, Sam. You all are. I regret dragging you all down with me." Steve sighed. "Maybe I should have signed. I almost did," he confessed. "After I failed to protect Bucky, after we were arrested, Tony almost talked me into signing, to make Sam's actions and mine retroactively legal. I was this close." He held up two fingers with hardly a hair's worth of space between them. "And then he told me he had Wanda under house arrest. She hadn't refused to sign. She hadn't taken any illegal actions, but still she was too dangerous to allow loose. I could see that those of us who were enhanced would be virtual prisoners under the Accords. It would have been concentration camps and internment camps all over again. I couldn't give Captain America's approval to that."
Wanda sighed. "I would have signed if you signed," she confessed. "Because I trust you far more than I will ever trust Tony Stark."
"Still holding a grudge?" Sam asked neutrally, in a nonjudgmental tone of voice.
Wanda made a face at him, recognizing Counselor Sam.
"No, I no longer blame him for what his weapons did to my parents — because I know now that was Obadiah Stane's doing, not his. I do not trust Tony Stark because he is driven by his demons. He sincerely believed that the Accords were the right path, but he believed the same thing about Ultron."
"Do you still hate him?" Clint asked.
"No, I understand him better now. I feel his pain and I am ashamed that I contributed to it. I found the place where his mind was fragile and I used it against him. Against all the Avengers. The thing he feared most was losing all his friends — and now he has."
Everyone was sadly silent, remembering moments of friendship with Tony Stark.
"He hasn't lost us. He's just mislaid us for awhile," Sam offered in encouraging tones.
"I think you all blame yourselves for too much," T'Challa said thoughtfully. "This may be destiny at work — with assistance from Baron Zemo."
"How do you mean?" Clint asked.
"The Avengers' success led to this," T'Challa said, waving his hand at the group. "Zemo hated the Avengers for the loss of his family in Sokovia. And he had the training to bring his vengeance to life."
"He said he had been studying us," Steve said. "He knew Tony would support me if I really needed help, despite the Accords. He knew the Winter Soldier had killed Tony's parents. He knew Tony would hate him for it. And he knew I would protect Bucky, even if it meant fighting Tony. He knew just how far our friendships would stretch."
"He knew you had two touchstones from your past, Peggy Carter and Bucky Barnes. Carter's funeral on the day the Accords were signed was fortuitous for him, but he probably knew she was failing. He knew you would protect your old friend Barnes — whether you signed the Accords or not!" T'Challa said with deep significance. "Whether you signed or not, you would have protected Barnes and been in violation of the Accords. It is your nature to protect."
"If I'd signed, maybe they would have let me try to bring Bucky in," Steve argued, just to see where T'Challa was going.
Natasha immediately shook her head. "They would have thought you were too close."
"And if you had persuaded him to surrender, that would not have stopped me from seeking revenge," T'Challa said. "But with or without our battle in the tunnels, we still would have ended up at the headquarters."
"Where Zemo was waiting," Natasha said. "And when Barnes broke out, you wouldn't have been able to stop yourself from helping him."
"So we would have ended up in conflict again," Steve realized.
Clint nodded. "And if everyone had listened when you told them about more Winter Soldiers in Siberia. Then all the Avengers would have gone to Siberia."
"And when Tony found out about his parents, he would have attacked with deadly force, unlike at the airport," Natasha said.
"Avengers would have died," Wanda said, swallowing the desire to vomit.
"Which would have pleased Zemo mightily," T'Challa said grimly.
"So, really, by getting captured and put in prison, we actually foiled the bad guy's scheme?" Scott asked, rhetorically and sardonically. "Yay, us."
"We did foil him," Sam insisted. "We're all alive and we're all free. The Avengers exist, even if we are scattered. So you can stop blaming yourself, Steve," he finished firmly.
"This isn't on you and it isn't on Stark," Natasha said.
"The Avengers created jealousy and fear and hate, through no fault of their own," T'Challa said.
"Some fault," Wanda corrected in a quiet voice.
"Small fault of their own," T'Challa amended. "Baron Zemo is just a single example of world opinion. Fear, envy, anger led to the creation of the Accords. Men of power cannot stand to see people with more power than they have. And so they created the Accords to bring that power under their control. I believe my father hoped to be a moderating influence when the details of oversight were worked out.
"The longer I ponder this, the more certain I am that, whether you signed or not, it was inevitable that you would run afoul of the Accords. None of you could stand idly by when danger or injustice threatened. You would act, and, signee or not, you would violate the Accords. You proved that, Agent Romanoff."
"And Tony, too," Steve realized. Tony had gone to Siberia to help, without Ross' authorization.
"And even you, your majesty," Natasha said.
"Even I."
Sharon Carter chuckled. "I wasn't even asked to sign and I'm still a fugitive," she pointed out. "T'Challa's right. Signing or not signing made no difference."
"So we were doomed, because we were heroes," Sam said, including Sharon in the sweep of his hand.
"Not doomed," T'Challa corrected. "One hundred and seventeen countries were afraid and Baron Zemo hated. These enemies have brought the Avengers low, but have not destroyed them."
"When the world needs us, we will be there," Steve vowed.
"But will they want us?" Clint sighed. "What's the opposite of hero-worship, anyway?"
A/N: I know this has been featuring Team Cap a lot, but I'm working on some heavy Tony angst, too. I'm an equal opportunity angster.
