Chapter 8
Christmas Morning 1989
She should have been happy. Rachel saw her parents arrive back together at the mansion late the night before. They had been giggling and holding hands looking like a couple of love-struck teenagers. Their happiness radiated off them so strongly. One didn't need to be a telepath to realize they'd finally taken the next step in their relationship. The turn of events probably just ensured she'd at least be born.
So why wasn't she happy? She sat at the top of the stairs watching her parents say goodbye to each other. "Call me when you get to your parents' place," Scott said, handing Jean her bag.
"Of course. I'm going to miss you… Next year, you're coming with me," Jean said, kissing Scott. Rachel couldn't help but smile, noticing the two not bothering to hide their new relationship status.
"Absolutely. And I'll miss you too, but we'll see each other before New Year's Eve, right?" Scott asked.
"You bet your cute butt we will!" Jean said, laughing.
Scott laughed too. "Will you be telling your parents about me… about us?" Scott asked.
"I want you to be there when I do, like we did with your parents last night. How about we have dinner with my folks on New Year's Day?" Jean suggested.
"Sounds like a plan!" Scott said.
"How are your ribs feeling?" Jean asked, concern evident in her voice.
"Much better. Really, don't worry about it. Enjoy your time with your parents, you rarely see them these days."
"If you're sure," Jean said, a bit reluctantly. The two embraced one last time and Jean got in her car and drove off. Scott stood by the door watching her drive off, a silly grin plastered to his face. When Jean was out of sight, he walked back up the stairs and saw Rachel sitting at the top.
"I guess you saw that?" Scott asked Rachel, smiling.
Rachel just smiled back. "Come on, Scott… You can say it, 'Rachel you were riiii…'-"
"Right. Yes, Rachel you were right," Scott said, laughing, obviously being a good sport.
"You going back to your folks' place?" Rachel asked.
"Yeah, I'm just heading back up to my room to grab my bag and head on out. I just wanted to see Jean off first," Scott said, moving past Rachel. "What about you? What are your plans?"
Rachel answered, "Oh umm… just hanging around here. Probably watch some Christmas specials on television."
"But you'll be here all by yourself," Scott said. "Everyone's leaving to visit family. Even the professor is spending the next few days with Moira."
"I don't mind. I'll have the mansion all to myself. I wouldn't mind the quiet." Rachel tried her best to put on a happy façade.
"Why don't you come have Christmas dinner with my family?" Scott asked. Jean had actually asked Rachel that same thing a few days ago. As much as she would have loved to, that would have been impossible. She didn't know what the consequences were if her parents' parents saw her before the right time.
"No, thank you. I really wanted to get some things done and I was looking forward to some quiet time. Don't worry about me," Rachel said.
"Are you sure? No one should be alone on Christmas," Scott said.
"I'm absolutely sure. Now go on, you need to get an early start," Rachel said, encouraging Scott to leave her.
"Okay…" Scott said, reluctantly. "If you change your mind, here's the number to my folks' place."
"Thanks," Rachel said, taking the slip of paper that Scott used to jot down his parents' number. With that, Scott ran upstairs.
Left with nothing but her thoughts, Rachel had to fight hard not to let her sadness overwhelm her. She once read somewhere that suicides were particularly high during Christmas time. She could now understand why. Yes, her parents in this time were now together, and she was definitely happy about that… But she still felt this deep melancholy. She was also worried about how her time in the past has affected her future. Had she changed how her parents got together? If so, what would the consequences be?
She wished she'd asked them more questions about their early years together when she was younger. It never even occurred to her to do so. They just always looked like they'd been together forever. She took it for granted. She sat there realizing that she took a lot of things for granted. Although her heart warmed at the thought that her parents in this time were having a wonderful Christmas, she felt so alone because she wasn't a part of their lives. Not in the way that she should have been.
She thought of her father and brother. Were they having Christmas too at that moment? She could only imagine how terrible their Christmas would be. Her mother was gone in her time. Rachel would be missing to them. She regretted not telling her brother, Nathan what she had planned to do. But he would have insisted in going with her and she couldn't have had that.
She thought back to her last Christmas. The memory was still so vivid in her mind. "Jean, honey, hurry up, we're about to open presents!" her father said, calling her mother.
"I'm coming, I just went to grab the camera," her mother said, bounding down the stairs with the new Nikon DSLR camera Rachel got her for her birthday.
Rachel had already been twenty years old at the time, and acted like she was too cool for presents. However, she had still secretly opened and rewrapped all the presents with her name on it a few nights before. She chuckled remembering how guilty she felt, but also how disappointed she was with the presents she thought her parents had gotten her.
Little did she know that her mom had been one step ahead of her. Her mom had put all the wrong names on the Christmas presents so Rachel wouldn't know which ones were actually hers. She hadn't realized until Christmas morning that the gifts she had secretly opened were her father's and brother's. Mom one – Rachel zero.
"Here is your real present, sweetheart. It's from your dad and I," Jean had said, handing Rachel a tiny blue box.
"Thanks, mom." Rachel opened the box and inside was a key. She had to do a double take to realize the key had a Mazda emblem on it. "No way! OH MY GOD!" Rachel wasted no time and ran outside to see a blue Mazda CX5 SUV with a big bow on it.
"I take it you like it?" Her dad asked.
"I love it!" Rachel almost squealed.
"Good, because your father and I hated that Smart Car you bought. I get anxiety every time you take that little toy out for a drive. Now you've got a bigger vehicle which will be safer for you," her mom said, giving her a hug. "Now promise me you'll sell that piece of -"
"I will, I will!" Rachel said, laughing.
Later that evening after dinner, she and her dad had some time alone, just the two of them in the family room. She noticed her dad just watching her mom in the kitchen baking cupcakes with Nathan. The last few years as she'd gotten older she wondered more and more about what made her parents' marriage so successful when most relationships around them fell apart. Perhaps that was what compelled her to ask her father that night, "Dad, do you think mom's pretty?"
"No…"
"Oh…" Rachel thought her father meant not anymore. But she looked at her mother and thought she was still gorgeous.
"Well… do you still want to be with her forever?"
"No…" her father said, not taking his eyes off her mother.
"Ummm… would you at least cry if she left you?" Rachel asked, getting really annoyed with her father's answers.
"No…"
"If yours and mom's lives hung in the balance, would you pick her life or yours?"
"Mine…"
"But I always thought you'd do anything for her!" Rachel said, throwing her hands up in the air.
"Nope…"
"Oh my god! That's awful, and to think…" Rachel couldn't even find the words to express her disappointment with her father. She got up and was about to walk away, when her father grabbed her hand and pulled her down beside him.
"Sweetheart, I don't think your mother's pretty, she is beautiful. I don't want to be with her forever, I need to be with her forever. I wouldn't cry if she left me, I'd just die. The reason why I wouldn't do anything for her, is because I'd do everything for her… And the reason why I would choose my life is because she is my life."
Rachel kept going back to those words in the days after her mother died. Her father hadn't lied. He did die when her mother did. Perhaps not in the physical sense. But in every other sense, he had ceased to live. In many ways, Rachel going back to the past wasn't just trying to save her mother, it was trying to save her father as well.
It was memories like those that Rachel kept close to her heart. But it was those same memories that weighed her heart down with immense sadness. In such a short amount of time, she had lost everything.
She was glad that she had things to do there in the past. Her work as a teacher at the school kept her busy and her loneliness at bay for the most part. But spending so much time with people she was so close to, and not having the same relationships was taking its toll. Back in her time, it used to annoy her when her many "aunts" and "uncles" treated her like their little niece instead of a grown woman; a member of the X-Men.
Rachel supposed it's true what they said, be careful what you wish for. She missed her Aunt Ororo, her Uncle Kurt, Uncle Peter and Uncle Hank. And although this time's Hank knew who she really was, it still wasn't the same. Here, she was Rachel, the new teacher. She wasn't the Rachel they all had a hand in helping raise along with her parents. Here, she wasn't her father's little girl. She wasn't her mother's baby. She was… a friend. And although it was quite the experience being friends with one's own parents, it was a poor substitute for what her heart craved.
So, she found herself wandering the mansion all alone, replaying past Christmases in her mind. She looked out the window and watched Scott get in his car and drive away. Rachel sighed, it was going to be a long, lonely day.
Later that evening
Jean drove up to the mansion and parked her car in her usual parking spot. She had meant to stay for a few days at her parents' house and come back just before New Year's Eve. But she couldn't stop thinking about Rachel spending Christmas all alone. So, she kissed her parents goodbye, told them she'd be back the following evening and that she wanted to spend the last few hours of Christmas with her friend.
Aside from Scott, she couldn't recall a time when she got so close to a friend so quickly. She'd only known Rachel for a few months, but she felt a connection with her. And although she'd never read Rachel's mind, and would never do so without permission, she'd always felt the woman's sadness. It was always there, like a cloud hovering over her. Oh, she would always put on a happy smile and most people were fooled by it, but Jean wasn't. And she knew it wasn't just the Christmas season. It had been there from the day she met her.
Jean wasn't stupid. She knew there was more to Rachel than she was letting on. With how much affection she spoke of her family, Jean couldn't believe that something as little as distance could keep her away from them for Christmas.
Things just didn't add up with her friend. Interestingly enough, it just occurred to Jean that she'd never caught any stray thoughts from Rachel. Not even once. That has never happened with anyone before. People in general had a tendency to think loudly.
Even the professor has let a frivolous thought slip out every now and again even if it was something as mundane as 'damn'. But not Rachel. She wondered if Rachel went out of her way to be extra careful around Jean. In a way, Jean was a little hurt by it. It meant Rachel didn't fully trust her. But she also had no idea what Rachel had been through in her young life, and everyone's entitled to their privacy.
Jean let herself into the mansion and went straight to the main living room. Before she even got there, she could hear Julie Andrews' familiar soprano singing 'My Favorite Things'. She stood by the door and saw Rachel watching The Sound of Music on television. Funny that, she would have been doing the exact same thing at her parents' house had she not left.
"That's one of my favorite films, you know," Jean said.
Rachel turned around, a surprised look on her face. "Jean! Oh my god, you scared me! I was so absorbed in the movie I didn't detect you telepathically. What are you doing here?" Rachel asked.
"It's a good thing I'm not a bad guy," Jean said. She had to suppress a laugh at the look on Rachel's face when she realized she wasn't alone. She knew as a telepath that Rachel was mentally kicking herself for letting her guard down.
"Yeah, I'd be dead now if you were," Rachel said. "You umm… didn't answer my question. What are you doing here? Shouldn't you be with your parents?"
"I spent the day with them, and I'm going back tomorrow morning. But I didn't want you to be alone on Christmas," Jean said, sitting next to her.
"You don't have to feel sorry for me, Jean. I'm okay. As you can see, Julie Andrews is doing a fine job of keeping me company," Rachel said, pointing at the television for emphasis.
"I didn't come back because I felt sorry for you -" Jean started. Rachel just gave her a raised eye-brow as if to say "liar". "Okay, maybe a little. But you know what? It isn't a chore for me to be here. I really enjoy your company. You're like a sister to me."
"Ummm… thanks… I guess," Rachel said, a bit awkwardly. Jean hugged Rachel to bring her point across even more. After a few moments, Jean changed the subject. "Rachel, if you don't mind my asking… You're very smart and beautiful, I find it hard to believe you don't have a boyfriend. I mean, I know you mentioned that your mom just passed away and that your family is far, but what about a significant other?"
"Well, there have been guys that have come and gone. But none really stuck around. My dad was a bit overprotective and most just got too intimidated to keep trying," Rachel said shrugging.
Jean laughed. "Wow, that's quite the dad you have. What did he do to scare them?"
"Hmm… Let's just say… his looks could kill," Rachel answered wryly.
"Ahhh, one of those huh? But you did mention you were his only daughter, right?"
"Yeah, he was always more protective of me than my brother. It used to bother me. With my powers, I couldn't really get taken advantage of… but now, I would give anything to have my dad back, his annoying self and all," Rachel said.
"How about your mom, was she overprotective too?" Jean asked.
"Not with the boys, no. My mom knew well enough that the only hurt I would suffer would be the emotional kind. No, she was more practical, worrying about things like how small my car was… if I were to get into an accident, that sort of thing. Yeah, my mom and dad, they balanced each other out."
"It sounds like you had great parents," Jean said.
"The best…" Rachel whispered.
Rachel and Jean turned towards the television and watched a little more of The Sound of Music. Just after the Do Re Mi song ended, Rachel turned to Jean and said, "You know, since you're here, I guess I could give you your present now." Rachel went across the room where the Christmas tree was and grabbed a red gift-wrapped present under the tree.
"I hope you like it," Rachel said, handing the gift to Jean.
"Thanks, you didn't have to get me anything." Jean proceeded to open the gift and gasped when she saw it. It was a first edition of A Christmas Carol by Charles Dickens, published in 1843. It was in excellent condition considering how old it was. "My god, Rachel. How in the world did you get your hands on a copy?"
Rachel shrugged. "I know of this rare bookstore in Manhattan. I wasn't actually looking for a present for you at the time, but I came across it while I was shopping and thought of you."
"But this must have cost a fortune!" Jean exclaimed, still not believing she had an original copy of her favorite book in her hands.
"That's not important. And think of it this way, you can read the book to your children in the future, continue the tradition your dad started," Rachel said. Jean hugged Rachel, tears brimming in her eyes.
"Thank you… I'll cherish this book forever," Jean said.
Jean and Rachel were jolted from their hug when a deep masculine voice said from the doorway, "Jean? What are you doing here?"
"Scott?" Jean and Rachel said in unison. They looked at each other and cringed. Two telepaths both missed Scott come in. **Well, good thing he wasn't a villain otherwise we'd both be toast,** Rachel said to Jean telepathically.
"What are you doing here, Scott?" Jean asked.
"I just asked you the same thing," Scott said, leaning down to kiss Jean. "I didn't want Rachel to be alone for Christmas, so I told my folks I'd be back tomorrow."
"I guess we were on the same page," Jean said, getting up and hugging Scott. Jean then proceeded to gush about her new present to Scott and showing him the book.
"Wow, Rachel, it's a good thing I gave Jean her present this morning because I definitely couldn't have lived up to yours!" Scott said, laughing.
"A small piece of advice, Scott…" Rachel said, "Always remember everything she says… it'll make gift giving that much easier."
"I'll keep that in mind," Scott said.
"Well, since you're here, I've got a little something for you too," Rachel said, getting up from the couch and picking a green gift-wrapped present under the tree.
"Here you go, Scott. Merry Christmas," Rachel said, handing him her gift.
Scott immediately ripped the gift wrap off and opened the box. It was a Tom and Jerry hand-painted ceramic figurine. It had Jerry running with a piece of cheese in his hands and Tom chasing right behind him. The craftsmanship of the piece was exquisite. "My god, thank you, Rachel!" Scott said, handing the figurine to Jean while he gave Rachel a hug.
"I hope you like it," Rachel said.
"I love it… I can't believe you even remembered our conversation about my brother," Scott said.
"We telepaths have a good memory… just ask Jean," Rachel said, laughing.
Jean added, "I'm gonna have to agree with Scott. I'm glad I gave him his present this morning, I definitely couldn't have lived up to this!" The three of them just laughed.
It was funny, Jean thought. Had it been any other woman who gave Scott such a thoughtful gift, she probably would have gotten jealous. But she couldn't muster up the feeling when it came to Rachel. She really did feel like Rachel was her sister. She had no idea why she felt that way, but she did.
"Anyway, since The Sound of Music is already playing, why don't I run to the kitchen and make us some popcorn. It seems there's still about an hour and a half left of the movie," Scott said.
"You sure you want to spend the night watching a chick flick, Scott?" Jean asked.
"Hon, if it means I get to cuddle with you all night long, I'd sit through a dozen of them," Scott said, kissing Jean on the cheek and running out of the room.
"Extra butter on mine, Scott!" Rachel yelled after him.
Scott came back just in time to watch the Lonely Goatherd scene. The three of them sat on the couch, Jean in the middle. They were completely engrossed in the movie. Halfway through, the three of them started singing along and laughed out loud each time one of them would get the words wrong. At that moment, Jean couldn't remember having had a more joyful Christmas.
To be continued…
