Hello all. I would like to thank spnlluva, linusfan13, CaptainAckles, Tie-Dyed Broadway and IsabellaFaye11 for the wonderful reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured this story. I love you all.

So here is the next chapter. I hope you like it.

Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural.


Dean entered the coffee shop he had agreed to meet his brother in with nervousness coursing through his veins. He could feel himself jump at the slightest sound and a need to check the room for every exit, just in Case. Hell, if he was being honest he was impressed that he hadn't stopped off at the bar on the way, but he hadn't. The reason being he wanted to prove to Sam that he had changed. Either that or because he had made sure that he didn't leave work until the last possible moment so there was no time to get a fortifying drink in without being late for the meet with Sam.

You see, while he had at his last session believed that Cas wouldn't tell his brother anything personal, the fact that Sam had texted him to arrange this meeting made him wonder if that trust was misplaced. What if Cas had told him? What if this meeting was so Sam could tell him that he didn't want to have anything to do with dirty scum like him? What would he do then? What would he do when he knew whatever he did he would never get his brother back? Well he knew that answer to that one. He would happily drink himself into an early grave, just like their dad had. Though the fact that his brother's opinion was so important to him had, for the first time, started to scare him, to worry him how much he put in Sam's hands. Cos he was starting to think that maybe that wasn't so normal or fair on Sam. What to do about it though, he had no friggin' idea. But right now he was going to meet his brother. When they had talked he would work out what he was going to do. No point counting you chickens before they've hatched and all that.


Sam sat in the corner of the coffee house and watched his brother come through the door. His behaviour shocked him. Because that man, that wasn't the Dean he knew. He was jumpy and… scared? He had no idea why he was being like that, but if he had to guess, it was because whatever drove him to drink was something that he did not want Sam to know. It was then watching his brother's eyes dart to every exit before they settled on the counter that he realised that maybe Dr Novak had had a point. You see, even while he was making his way to this meeting he had thought that maybe he could get his brother to tell him what was the root cause of his problem. But one look at Dean, and Sam knew he couldn't do that to him. No. Right now all he wanted to do was reassure him, like Dean had done for him when he was younger, that everything was going to be alright. With that in mind he raised his hand to gain his brothers attention.


Dean looked around the coffee house, thinking that he was there before Sam, but then he saw the giant of a little brother of his sitting in the corner raising his hand. Damn, how was it Sammy managed to be inconspicuous when he was as tall as he was? But he was just tiring to put his mind from what was to come, just like nodding at his brother and then approaching the counter to get a drink, was just putting off the inevitable. But he needed time. He needed to calm himself before he faced Sammy sober for the first time in years.


Sam sat and waited for Dean to join him with anticipation. Now he had seen his brother he wanted to talk to him, though what about he wasn't completely sure, but hell, they were brothers. Surely they could find some topic to cover. They had never had a problem talking before after all.


Dean approached Sam holding his black coffee in both hands to make sure that there was no sign of shaking, though whether that would have been from nerves or withdrawal he had no idea. But either way he made it. Setting the coffee carefully on the table he sat opposite from his brother and taking a deep breath raised his eyes, ready to take whatever verdict, and punishment, his brother gave him. He deserved nothing less after all.

"Hey Dean. You're looking good." Sam said in lieu of a greeting, smiling at his brother trying to put him at ease.

"Yeah, you too." Dean replied cautiously. Wondering if Sam was just trying to put him at ease before he went for the kill. He deserved that. His brother telling him he didn't want him in his life, didn't want to even breathe the same air as him. That he should have just drank himself to death rather than make the world put up with his sort of scum. That he was a dirty perverted faggot that should have been put to death at birth.

While these thoughts went through Dean's mind Sam sat and watched his brother closely. He had no idea what he was thinking, but he could see that it was torture to his brother. He just had no idea how to make it stop. The doc would he was sure, but he Sam, he had no freaking clue. He was lost on how to help his brother, bring him back to him. Back to the here and now. It was then that Dr Novak's words came back to him. "Talk… reconnect as brothers." It seemed he had knew what he was talking about, more than Sam had thought. As such with that man on his mind he opened his mouth to break the silence that had descended between him and Dean. And hopefully remove that look of pain that he could see in his brothers eyes no matter how hard he tried to hide it.

"So I went to see Dr Novak today." He said as conversationally as he could, trying to make it sound like it was no big deal.

"Yeah, and what did Cas have to say?" Dean replied in a voiced which was obviously forced to sound as casual as his brothers.

"Cas?" Sam asked diverted by the nickname it seemed Dean had given his doctor. Cos let's be honest, only Dean would do that.

"We're informal in my sessions." Dean mumbled in response pushing all thoughts of waking up in the man's bed from his mind. Or at least trying to. Now was not the time or place for those thoughts.

"Right. Well he said you were doing well, really good." Sam responded realising that Dean calling the doctor Cas was just Dean being, well, Dean.

"Well, I'm trying." Dean replied with a small smile yet again pushing away thoughts of that night he failed. It seemed Cas hadn't mentioned any of that thank god. Or anything that he had told him. Cas had kept his promise, and that alone made Dean feel like a million freakin' dollars. He felt the weight of sentence lift from his shoulders. He was free, for now at least. But he wouldn't think of the future, just enjoy this time of peace. Of freedom, for as long as it lasted.

"That's good Dean, hell it's great." Sam replied a genuine smile splitting his face. He was so damn proud of Dean right now. Cos he knew if Dean was trying then he would succeed. That was just who his brother was. He had never failed once when he put his mind to something. It made Sam relax, his brother was going to get better, he knew it now.

"Thanks. So how Jess?" Dean asked turning the conversation quickly from him. He didn't do praise, he didn't deserve it. Plus there was too much he didn't want to talk about thank you very much.

"She's amazing. She wanted me to tell you she says hi and that she hopes to see you round ours soon. She said she'll even make you pie and everything." Sam replied with a smile knowing that Jess would happily make pie for Dean after he told her of well he was doing. Hell, she would do all she could to support Dean, just as he would.

"Awesome. She makes good pies." Dean answered with a smirk, the old Dean starting to come to the fore now that the danger zone had been past.

"Yeah she does." Sam agreed glad to see that look on his brother's face. It was one he hadn't seen in far too long in his mind.

"So umm, congrats again and all that. You guy's set a date yet?" Dean asked keeping the conversation away from him and in a light, happy area. He was having a good time and he did not want that to end.

"Not yet, though we're thinking next summer." Sam replied taking a sip of his coffee as he watched his brother. He was wondering if now was the right time for asking something he had wanted to ask Dean ever since Jess had said yes.

"Cool." Dean responded with a smile for his brother, though inside he was wondering just why Sam was looking at him like that. What had he done to make his brother cautious? Was now the time for the hammer to fall? But whatever was going through his head he made sure he keep his happy mask in place, it was there now, he could kept it there even if it killed him. It was the one that had fooled Sam all his life. And it didn't disappoint him now.

"And well you know, when the time comes, I'm hoping you'll be my best man." Sam finally mumbled out. Hoping that he hadn't made a massive mistake. Because Dean the drunk he did not want at his wedding. But the big brother who had raised him and been there for him for his whole life, he was the one he wanted at his side as he married the woman he loved.

"Course Sammy." Dean replied with a sincerity that caused tears to gather at the corner of Sam's eyes. Because that was the voice he knew from times past meant that Dean would move heaven and earth to get him what he wanted. His brother really was determined to get better. And it was freaking brilliant.

"So what else is happening in your life?" Sam asked before they could slip into what Dean referred to as chick-flick territory. He knew he brother would really not want to go there.

"Not much. Just work really. Kinda boring." Dean replied with a shrug, though he had a small smile on his lips. He knew full well what his brother was doing, and if he wasn't so damn glad that he was, he would take the piss out of him for going all teary.

"So, no new relationship on the horizon or anything?" Sam asked. Cos let's be honest this was Dean -ladies' man- Winchester. When he had known him before, well he seemed to have a different woman hoovering round him each time he saw him.

"Nah, they say you shouldn't change things too much when in the program." Dean replied skirting round the subject as best he could. Cos in all honesty he didn't want to lie to Sam and tell him about his 'latest woman', not anymore. But he also wasn't going to tell him the truth. He had just got his brother back, he wasn't going to throw him away again. Maybe now things could get back to the way they were.

"Right of course." Sam nodded in response. Though mentally he was kicking himself, he knew that for god sake. He had read all the info he could get his hands on about the program Dean had enrolled on.

"Though there is this one-" Dean said trying to make his brother feel better and bring back the relationship they had had just a second ago. He didn't want to lose Sam again. He wanted them to be as they once were. How they were earlier with the casual conversation. He wanted that, and he would get that. Of that he was certain.

"Oh yeah? Why am I not surprised?" Sam replied with a chuckle glad to see that his brother wasn't so changed. Of course he found a woman to flirt with in recovery.

"Cos I'm the awesome Dean Winchester?" Dean replied cheekily. Yes this was him and Sam at their best.

"Jerk." Sam replied in the automatic at his brother's self-assurance.

"Bitch." Dean responded without thought and with a smile. It had been too long since he had said that to his brother. Cos that was their way of say that they loved each other. And by god how that was true.

"So tell me about her." Sam said with a smile on his face that he knew nothing could remove. He was back with his big brother. With his Dean.

"The bluest eyes you'll ever see. And messy curly black hair that is styled in the just got out of bed look." Dean replied searching his mind for someone he could pretend to be interested, though he refused to use pronouns. There were some lies he just couldn't keep up anymore, not after the fear that had gripped him before this meeting, and even if he wasn't telling the truth, at least, in that, he was lying. The only face that came to him was Cas', so hell, he went with that. He just hoped his brother didn't pick up on the resemblance of his 'supposed woman' to his doctor.

"Sounds good. So you going to hook up with her?" Sam asked the description completely bypassing him in its similarities to the doctor Castiel Novak. In his mind Dean was a ladies man through and through. The idea he could have a thing for Castiel never even crossed his mind. Hell it wasn't even in the possibility of his ideas.

"Nah. Not really the time or place you know?" Dean answered with a shrug, breathing out a sigh of relief that Sam didn't pick up on that, or the lack of pronouns.

"Yeah okay. I get that." Sam replied with a nod dismissing the woman from his mind as quickly as she had come to it. This was Dean after all. He no doubt would have a different chick to be chasing next week.

"So how about you? Any new cases on your desk?" Dean asked changing the subject to one he knew his brother couldn't refuse talking about.

"Oh man, there's this one-" And with that Sam slipped easily into a discussion of his work and Dean sitting across from him smiled. This was how it used to be between the two of them. They would met up for a drink and Sam would tell him about what he was working on, not that Dean would listen half the time, but he did love hearing the passion in his brothers voice. He was glad they could do this again. The only difference being that rather than a beer between them there was now coffee, and that was a difference he could deal with. He hoped.