I'm
everything you've wanted. I am the one who's haunting you, I am the
eyes inside of you, stare back at you
There's nothing left to
lose, There's nothing left to prove. Surrender your love, it's all
you can do...Yeah!
What you got, what you want, what you need?
Gonna be your Savior. Everything's gonna crash and break
But I
know, yeah I know. What you got, what you want, what you need? Gonna
be your Savior. Everything's gonna crash and break. Your Savior
It's
time to redefine your deophobic mind, Don't hesitate, no escape, From
secrets on the inside
There's nothing left to lose, There's
nothing left to prove, Surrender your love, it's all you can
do..Yeah!
What you got, what you want, what you need? Gonna be
your Savior. Everything's gonna crash and break
But I know, yeah I
know. What you got, what you want, what you need? Gonna be your
Savior. Everything's gonna crash and break. Your Savior
I am the
eyes inside staring back at you, I am the eyes inside staring back at
you, You need, You need….Me..yeah!
What you got, what you need?
Everythings gonna crash and break. What you got, what you need?
Everythings gonna crash and break.
What you got, what you want,
what you need? Gonna be your Savior, Everything's gonna crash and
break
But I know, yeah I know. What you got, what you want, what
you need? Gonna be your Savior, Everything's gonna crash and break.
Your Savior
I'm watching you,
Cause you need...
yeah,
yeah,
Cause you need me...
Yeah I'm watching you...
…………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….
Edward's POV
"NO!!!" I screamed and rushed toward her. "BREATHE DAMNIT BREATHE!!" I yelled as Emmett and Jasper held me back away from her. "BELLA!!!" I started screaming over and over. I just found the love of my life, I couldn't loose her now. "Make the call Edward. We don't have much time. Do you want to change her or not?!" Carlisle demanded. "Fuck…" I dry sobbed, I rarely said that word. But shit just hit the fan, everything seemed to be crashing all around me and I was unable to stop it. "Do it Carlisle. I cant live without her." I whispered and let my body go limp in my brothers arms. I closed my eyes and consintrated on my breathing even though I didn't need to. I watched what Carlisle was doing through his mind, I was so intent on his I didn't hear any one elses.
He didn't want to do this, but he wanted to save her and he could think of no other way. He bit into her neck, and two seconds after he did that her heart started pounding and the screaming started. At least she was breathing again, even though she wouldn't make it out of this one alive, not fully alive. She would be the walking dead, always ruled by the thirst, and if she decided to stay with our coven, she would never fully be satisfied. Carlisle moved Bella to the basement, which had a bed and couches for such emergencies, and I was carried down there by Jasper. I was so dejected I couldn't figure out how to move my legs. I couldn't believe I was letting Carlisle let me be so selfish.
I cradled Bella in my lap while she writhed around and screamed for three whole days. "Im sorry, im so sorry." I dry sobbed over and over. Sometimes she responded to me, sometimes she just kept her eyes closed and tried to not make any noise. Carlisle explained to me what he thought had happened to her. He believed that she had multiple sleeping disorders that no one knew about, cause most likely by her traumatic experience. He believed she probably had Narcolepsy, Cataplexy, Night Terrors, Parasomnias, and Sleep Apnea.
Narcolepsy is a chronic sleep disorder characterized by overwhelming drowsiness and sudden attacks of sleep. The condition is most characterized by excessive daytime sleepiness in which a person experiences extreme tiredness and possibly falls asleep during inappropriate times, such as at work or school. A narcoleptic will most probably experience disturbed nocturnal sleep, which is often confused with insomnia, and disorder of REM or rapid eye movement sleep.
Cataplexy, a sudden muscular weakness brought on by strong emotions, is a medical condition which may also affect narcoleptics. Often manifesting as muscular weaknesses ranging from a barely perceptible slackening of the facial muscles to the dropping of the jaw or head, weakness at the knees, or a total collapse. Usually only speech is slurred, vision is impaired (double vision, inability to focus), but hearing and awareness remain normal. In some rare cases, an individual's body becomes paralyzed and muscles will become stiff.
A night terror, is a Parasomnias disorder characterized by extreme terror and a temporary inability to regain full consciousness. The subject wakes abruptly from slow-wave sleep, with waking usually accompanied by gasping, moaning, or screaming. It is often impossible to fully awaken the person, and after the episode the subject normally settles back to sleep without waking. A night terror can rarely be recalled by the subject. They typically occur during non-rapid eye movement sleep.
Parasomnias are a category of sleep disorders that involve abnormal and unnatural movements, behaviors, emotions, perceptions, and dreams that occur while falling asleep, sleeping, between sleep stages, or arousal from sleep. Most Parasomnias are dissociated sleep states which are partial arousals during the transitions between wakefulness and NREM sleep, or wakefulness and REM sleep
Sleep apnea is a sleep disorder characterized by pauses in breathing during sleep. Each episode, called an apnea lasts long enough so that one or more breaths are missed, and such episodes occur repeatedly throughout sleep.
This could possibly explain why she stopped breathing and why I couldn't wake her up. Since she never had a diagnosis, and wasn't taking medications for it, we caught it to late and she would have died from it. Carlisle said it felt like when she arched back she snapped her spine, but I was too lost in what I thought was right to do to hear it snap. Which, that too, I could also believe. It was all so hard to believe that something like this could happen to my Bella. She was an angel, she didn't deserve any of this. i sighed as I waited for her to wake up a vampire. I didn't know what was going to be done. We would have to move, that was almost certain.
Bella couldn't be allowed to be near people. We needed to be more secluded now. I sighed. I brought this on all of us, on my family, on Bella and her family. I was a monster. But I loved her so much… I couldn't even bare the thought to lose her. Im a selfish creature. I shouldn't be allowed to excist. Carlisle should have let me die during the Spanish Influenza.
I listened for Bella's last heart beat, one I would imprint on my memory forever, because it was the last one id ever hear again. She must be getting close to being fully turned by now. Its been three days. My whole family was surrounding us now in case she had a fit. With new borns, it was hard to tell how they would react when they woke up. I looked down at Bella's face. She had her eyes closed, her face was twisted in pain, and had tear stains all along it. Her hair had turned more red, her skin impossibly paler, her lips got fuller and more red. Her curves were more evened out, but still there. She still looked like Bella.
Suddenly her back arched up, she let out a piercing scream, and her heart thudded for the last time, then she fell down onto the bed and held her breath while keeping her eyes closed.
"Bella?" I asked. I was vaguely aware of my family moving closer. She gasped and opened her eyes. "I thought I was in hell." She said with a voice so seductive I wanted to just lean in and kiss her right then. She looked at me surprised, then she smiled, "Edward." She whispered and placed her hand on the side of my face. Her dark red eyes pierced mine "Bella." I smiled down at her. "Welcome to the family!" Emmett boomed from the other side of the room. She turned around and smiled toward him. "Thank you Em." She said with a slight laugh.
"So… what happened?" she asked. I took a deep breath. I so didn't want to tell her all of this.
……………………………………………………………………………………………………………….
Bella's POV
I listened to him and Carlisle as they told me everything they thought happened to me. I wasn't even aware I had a sleeping disorder. I was shocked, but I felt great. I wasn't thirsty at all like Edward said I should be. I felt stronger than usual, and my brain seemed to have so much more room in them. I felt like I really wasn't seeing before, everything was so much more clear now. I could see the dust motes. I almost giggled when that thought registered, but I refrained from doing so.
I wouldn't be allowed to see my dad, or my mom, ever again. This made me slightly depressed, but I could handle it as long as Edward stayed at my side. I was elated that I couldn't sleep, I would never have a nightmare again. Alice had somewhat taken care of Charlie. He thought that I ran away somehow, and that when she went into town this morning there were posters with my picture up all over the place, along with pictures of Jacob Black.
I don't know why Jacob would disappear but apparently he did the same night I did. Everyone thought he had kidnapped me. I shuddered at the thought. He was big enough, he could have done it. But he didn't, and I was great full for that.
