"No, Sargent Space! Please! Don't sacrifice yourself for me!" Cries Shades on screen. Sargent Space merely looks away, eyes wet.
"Sacrifice yourself, Sargent Stupid. You must, it's not like there are any other glaringly obvious solutions." Izaya drawls at the TV. Shizuo snorts in his sleep beside him, drooling onto his pillow.
"Lovely..." He sighs dramatically, scooting away a little. He acts disgusted, but a little voice in his head sounding suspiciously like Namie reminds him he doesn't have to be sitting with the beast and watching TV. He has his own hospitals bed two feet away, after all.
"There is no other option! If I don't go, he'll kill you!" Sargent Space cries, backing away from Shades.
"What WHAT? He's not holding a weapon! And your cheesy powers have never been able to kill anyone! Stab him with that fancy staff you're always carrying but never use." Izaya says, in a completely sane way of course, to the television.
"Noooo, Sargent! Can't love find a way?" Shades asks, voice deep and sultry enough to be ridiculous. He's sure his sisters would be swooning, were they here.
"Yeah, a way to make me puke."
Sargent space sobs, and the villain is starting to look annoyed. Izaya feels him. He grabs Sargent by the arm, tugs them away from the ever so manly and dramatic Shades. 'What a cool name for someone who looks like a glorified bartender.' He thinks, cringing.
"Shut up, all of you! I am taking Sargent Space for myself! We'll make quite the pair, won't we Spacey?"
"I see no other option..." Sargent space mumbles, looking down tearfully.
"I take it back," Izaya sighs yet again, considering turning the channel. "Now I want him to stab our good hero."
"Wait!" Suddenly, her two side kicks appear. Yay. "You CAN'T take the Sargent as your partner!" Triumphantly yells Yang, the lieutenant of the night.
"They are already married." Elaborates Yin, the lieutenant of the day.
"T-that was just a prank you two pulled!" Sargent Space gasps, blushing.
"It's legal, though! You signed the papers!" That's Yang, smirking and holding up a marriage certificate.
"And said 'I do.'" Yin tosses the couple their rings.
"Ooohhh nooo!" The villain cries. "Darn you, Sargent Space! I'll get you next time!" He cries, running off into the night. The lieutenant's high five each other, and the movie ends with a proper wedding between Sargent Space and Shades.
"Wait..." Izaya frowns at the TV. "The bad guy was perfectly fine with stealing Sargent Space, enslaving them as forced partner, taking them away from their family, but he crosses the line at doing this to a married woman? THAT'S what stops him? Ugh..." He groans, completely unsatisfied.
Izaya flips through the channels, until something catches his eye. Men running around in white uniforms, excited cheers, and the loud pop of balls hit by bats. Baseball.
"Baseball, huh?" He sighs. He flips through some more channels. There are some cartoons on that he'd normally be interested in, but Sargent Space put him in a sour mood. He flipped back to baseball, sliding down further under the covers and being careful not to rip anything out of Shizuo when their sides press together.
It's warm, comforting, and the fresh sheets and light covers feel nice paired with Shizuo's body heat. He shifts him, so that Shizuo is slightly on his side and facing izaya instead of leaning against the bed railing. Izaya smirks to himself a little, because his bed doesn't have railing. 'If that's so important then why aren't you in your own bed?' Thats Namie's voice again.
'Shut up.' He thinks back to himself. 'I'm messing with Shizu-chan, that's all.'
'Really? When he has no idea what's going on and won't ever be aware any of this happened?'
'He'll wake up, he'll get so annoyed he'll wake up just to kill me.'
'You know he's never waking up.'
His breath hitches, teeth gritting. That's not true, Shizuo will wake up! He's not going to lay in this bed forever, no matter what. Izaya won't let this monster be peaceful, he won't let Shizuo live in a fantasy where he gets to brutalize Izaya at will and torment both a fake him and real him. It won't happen.
And it's this determination that gives him an idea.
