A/N: So I'm sorry for not updating for a long time. School started up and with marching band sucking away my soul, I ran out of time. Anyway, I managed to find a few spare hours to write this for you. I hope you enjoy it! It's kinda short. Sorry.
Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto, but I do have a bottle of sake!
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"Love potion!" the second Itachi exclaimed as he poured the sake down Sasuke's throat. Sasuke twitched and tried to shove him off, but it was no use.
The first (and real) Itachi sighed and watched. Eventually, the second (and fake) Itachi got off of him and allowed him to stand up.
To Sasuke, however, the world was spinning. Grabbing the couch for support, he turned to the first Itachi. "Yello Hitachi!"
Itachi sighed and turned to his brother. "What happened to you?"
"I hjust ahad sum yummi stuof frum aniii-sannnnnn." He giggled. "Yummmmmy sakeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee."
The first Itachi glanced at him, sighed again, and turned to leave. Suddenly, Sasuke shot forward, grabbing his brother's ponytail. "Hey! ONIISAN! You're an oneesan! You look like a girl! Like this hot Hyuuga with long brown hair!" He giggled again. "I wanna snooooooog yooooooooooooouuuu!" Sasuke fell to the ground, giggling and still holding Itachi's ponytail.
"OW!" Itachi was jerked down by Sasuke. "Just so you know, I'm secretly recording this so you won't be able to deny anything you just said."
"HAHAHAHAHA!" Sasuke fell over, letting go of Itachi's ponytail. "You're recording this. FOR YOU LOVER! Hahaha! Orochimaru! Hahaha!" He hiccuped.
Itachi rolled his eyes. "I told you not to drink."
Sasuke laughed. "I fink Hitachi's dwunk, too!"
Itachi turned to his brother slowly. "Stupid….foolish….little….BROTHER!"
"Oneesan!" Sasuke clung to Itachi again. "My older sister! Okasan! Mother!" He hugged Itachi harder.
"I am neither your sister nor your mother. Try brother." Itachi tried to free himself from Sasuke's grip.
Sasuke snuggled against Itachi. "Whant sum sakkkkkeeeee fwom Neji?"
Itachi glared at him. "No. I don't want to end up like you. Ever."
Sasuke pouted for a second, and then his features lit up. "But you and kissssssssssss…." He trailed off, giggling. "Kisssss…." He laughed again. "Kisssssame! Your LOVBER!"
Itachi shook his head. "Kisame's not my lover. And if you don't stop this now, no more piggy back rides."
Sasuke stopped and gave him a look of horror. "NOOOOOO!" Leaning back, Sasuke fell into a pit of despair.
Itachi watched him fall, a vacant expression on his face.
"I'll gib you rides!" Sasuke said from the pit. "And hugs! It's nbot my fauwlt he gave me sakkkeeeee!" Sasuke pointed at the second Itachi who was standing idly by. "Damn him!" Reaching down to grasp his hand, Sasuke's arm began to errupt with blue, squeaking Chakra.
Itachi watched as Sasuke started a drunken Chidori. "This can't end well." He ran out of the way as Sasuke dashed forward. "GOD DAMMIT, SASUKE! GET A HOLD OF YOURSELF!"
Sasuke stopped and looked at his brother. "What?"
"You're drunk!"
"What?"
"Knock it off!"
"No I'm bnot," Sasuke said defiantly.
"Yes, you are."
"Noooooooooooooooooo!" Sasuke protested like a toddler.
"You said so yourself!" Itachi said. "I think I'm going to ban you from Neji's parties! No more parties."
"NOOOO!" Sasuke whined, looking at Itachi. "I'll do my pouty face! I will! I will!"
"You're drunk, Sasuke." Itachi sighed. "And it'll mess up your life. Why do you think Tobi is the way he is?"
"And you would know a lot about messing up lives," Sasuke said, his face suddenly going dark.
"Yes. I would. Concidering I killed MOTHER AND FATHER!" Itachi yelled, watching Sasuke back down. "I KILLED THEM! KILLED! KILLED! KILLED! SLAUGHTERED!"
"No! No killing!" Sasuke fell to his knees. "NOO! MOTHER! FATHER! NOOO!" He spun around to look at Itachi, his face murderous. Once again, the room filled with the sound of a Chidori as Sasuke powered his up.
"Do you really want to do that?" Itachi asked calmly.
"B….but you killed mother and father," Sasuke reasoned.
"I had to see how strong I was." Itachi wasn't looking at Sasuke anymore.
"SO!? ATTACK AN EFFING MANICAN! NOT THE CLAN!" Sasuke yelled. "Not your own! Kill the Hyuugas if you must! They're easy! In more than one way."
"WHAT??" Now it was Itachi's turn to give a death glare. Sasuke shook his head. "Fine. I forgive you. I still love you, otoutosan." Sasuke turned away. "And I have a mission tomorrow. I'll be back around seven. Alright? I love you!" He kissed Sasuke on the cheek and Sasuke faked vomitting.
"Goodbye, Sasuke." Itachi smiled and disappeared in a puff of smoke.
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A/N: So that was chaotic. Sorry for the random winding down. I just couldn't figure out how to end it. Anyways, the next few chapters will still be a comedy, but I'm realizing it's kind of a drama comedy. What ever.
Reviews are my best friend!
