MERRY (late) CHRISTMAS AND A HAPPY NEW YEAR! I hope each and every one of you had a wonderful winter break with your family and friends, filled with laughter and joy and remembering the celebration of the birth of our Savior! I know it's been a while since I've posted but I've been so busy lately! I'm so thankful for each of you that have waited patiently and haven't given up on me! This chapter will be short and dramatic but this will be the part where the action begins! Thank you all so much! Enjoy this chapter! God bless all of you! :D
What hurts the most was being so close
And having so much to say and watching you walk away
And never knowing what could have been
And not seeing that loving you
Was what I was trying to do
- What Hurts the Most, Rascal Flatts
On the outside, Sonic appeared completely calm.
On the inside, however, he was the complete opposite. His heart was pounding, his hands were trembling, and he was sure that his feet were drenched in his shoes from his sweat. He stood there, staring at Amy. He had just semi-confessed how he felt about her and he was waiting impatiently for her response. He stood there, waiting as calmly as he could be and prepared for her to say or do something, anything at all.
At first she just stood there, with her mouth agape and her eyes wide. Of course he expected her to be surprised but he was not expecting her to just be standing there, looking at him as if he had just been transformed into a goldfish or something unrecognizable. He thought that he was prepared and expected any possible reaction. A waterfall of tears, one of those death-grip hugs of hers, a smile of joy… He had readied himself for all of those.
This blank and eerie silent feedback he was receiving was something he was not expecting.
He counted the seconds going by in his head.
One...
She was still staring at him.
Two...
Her mouth still agape, not saying anything at all.
Three...
She remained unmoving.
Sonic waited for an agonizing twenty-two seconds before Amy's body finally found movement. It was a reaction he was not expecting. She lowered her head, her bangs shielding her eyes and concealing any trace of an expression. Her hands came up and wrapped around her arms, in a gesture of hugging herself. Sonic's hands clenched and unclenched themselves nervously as he stared at her. But even as he stood there, waiting, he saw nothing that he was ready for.
"Sonic," she began at last.
Sonic's heart pounded harder than it was before. This was it! The moment of truth!
Amy looked up at him, her expression changed only slightly. It changed from surprised and was now completely blank; void of all and any emotion. Sonic felt his stomach churn at her expression.
"I'm going to have to…decline."
Sonic blinked at her response and his confidence vanished. He hadn't expected her to decline. If anything, he had expected her to smile that beautiful smile of hers, leap into his arms, and repeat 'yes!' at least one hundred and five times. But she didn't say no, he noted. "Oh," he said quietly, obviously not ready for her rejection. He shifted uncomfortably. "Perhaps another night then?" he asked again, hope rising in his chest again.
Amy shook her head firmly, her eyes burning into his.
"No, Sonic," she replied, her voice tight. "I'm… not going to go out on any dates."
Sonic stared at Amy for a long moment, his eyes scanning her face. Her eyes were known to him for holding many emotions. As she was a very transparent person, her feelings were very apparent in her expressions. But the ones he saw clear were seriousness and regret. It was a strange sight for him to see, especially coming from Amy. She lowered her hands and stood with her back straightened and her fists clenched at her sides. She raised her eyes and stared straight at him. Sonic looked at her carefully. There was something different about her, something he had never noticed before. Was it anger? No it was something else.
"Ames," he began softly. He noticed that when he said her nickname – the name he had given her all those years ago - she outwardly flinched and bit her lip. Closing her eyes, she lowered her head once more and brought a hand up to cover eyes, as if to shield her face from Sonic seeing any of her emotions. Sonic felt accountable for her state. He took a step towards her. Was she trying not to cry?
"Do you remember…?" Amy began, causing Sonic to halt his advances. "What you said to me three days ago?"
Sonic felt his sympathy become replaced with fear as he listened to Amy's tone. It was nothing like he recognized before. There was no joy or laughter in her tone of voice like he had anticipated the entire day. It was deeper, as if she were trying to block any sort of tone out of her voice. He watched her as she refused to meet his gaze. He shifted uncomfortably. He was not expecting this question…
"I said many things, Amy," he began, his mind searching for the right words to say. "You know that I-," Sonic swallowed hard. "That I didn't mean any of it-,"
"Do you remember," Amy repeated, her tone harsher this time. "What you said to me?"
Sonic's mind raced for the words to say to her. Of course he had said things, unforgiving words. But he never meant any of them and he thought that she would know and understand that. Sonic opened his mouth, ready to respond even though he had no correct words to say. All words fell away from Sonic's lips as Amy raised her eyes to meet his. He found no love in them as he had expected, nor any joy, or any spark of happiness. They were narrowed dangerously at the blue hero. Her whole body was now tense as she remained still, as if she were holding herself back from moving physically.
"Since you have trouble remembering," Amy said calmly although her tone was laced with fury. "I will remind you what you said to me. The night that you shattered my heart."
Sonic's chest filled with panic as for a few moments he forgot to breathe.
Oh no.
"You told me that you didn't want a relationship with me."
No.
"You told me that you wanted me to let you go."
Please, no.
"You told me," Amy was now holding back tears, her voice cracking. "You told me not to love you anymore."
Sonic let out the breath he was holding, his chest burning and his chest aching. He knew that what Amy was saying was true and he would be in denial if he had said otherwise. But that did not stop the hurtful words from cutting deep wounds at his heart.
"You just told me," Sonic said, hopeful. "That you forgave me."
Amy let out a bitter laugh as she reached up to wipe a tear away.
"Of course I forgive you, you idiot," she said as her hand returned to holding her other arm. "But that does not mean that what you said to me does not still hurt…" She failed in choking back a heavy sob. "I forgive you, Sonic. But it still hurts so bad…"
It pained Sonic even more to hear it coming from her mouth, from her very lips. He glanced to the side, not bearing to gaze at the broken hedgehog for very long. He knew that he had broken her heart. He was guilty of causing her this pain. But what could he say to her that could make her feel better?
Nothing, he realized.
Not knowing what words to say, he decided to let actions take over.
Sonic reached out and wrapped his arms around the now shaking Amy. He pulled her close to his chest and tightened his hold on her. It was uncomfortable for him, as the only hugs that he and Amy ever shared were always initiated by Amy. In all honesty, he had feared Amy's embraces. As he held her in his arms, as he rested his chin on her head and cradled her against him, his perspective on embraces changed instantaneously. But even as he held her, she was still tense and she did not return his embrace. In fact, her soft almost-sobs had ceased and her breathing was almost unnoticed.
This has to stop, he told himself. We need to sort all of this out and deal with this now.
"Ames?" he asked again. "Will you look at me?" he asked gently.
"I-I can't." Her voice cracked, showing her true feelings although he could not fully see her face. "If I look at you… (hic) I won't be able to…"
Sonic raised an eyebrow.
"You won't be able to what?" he asked softly. When she did not answer, he gently began to rub her back in a comforting gesture. "C'mon, Ames. Tell me."
A small breeze passed through the two hedgehogs. Sonic waited patiently for Amy's reply, expecting her to return his embrace and cry into his chest. He wanted to wait for her as she waited for him all these years. But unexpected shove caused Sonic to fall backwards. Although he was caught by surprise, he managed to find his footing before completely falling on his tail. He had been caught completely off-guard by her forceful shove but what truly made Sonic stand still was Amy's eyes when he saw her.
Her back was straightened once more, as if confidence has suddenly replaced any sort of uncertainty or hurt. Her eyes were narrowed dangerously once more. The sparkles of almost reached delight were replaced with a cold and livid glare and her lips pressed into a very thin line. For the first time in his life, Sonic was truly afraid of Amy's eyes. Sonic's eyes scanned Amy for a moment. This was not the Amy he knew. 'What happened to you, Amy?' He wanted to ask, but Amy had spoken first.
"To do as you asked me," she replied, her voice dead and cold as her eyes. But the tears in her eyes betrayed her angered countenance. "To stop loving you." With that, she turned around and ran away from him.
Sonic was frozen where he stood as he watched her run further away from him. Part of him screamed to run after her, to gather her in his arms and to talk this out. It echoed through every fiber of his being to make things right with her, even to the point of making amends. It wanted to have her, to call her his own. To hold her hand for the first time, to continue holding her, to whisper sweet nothings to her…
The other part of him felt the pain.
The pain that he immediately recognized as he was a causer of it.
The pain immobilized him.
It hurt his heart. The only thing Sonic could compare the pain to was the time when Shadow had shot a Chaos Spear at him at the Space Colony ARK. It was unbearable and relentlessly stung afterward, he remembered. It was hard for him to breathe without his heart clenching mercilessly against his chest. It was real; and it felt more real than when he first realized that he truly liked Amy.
So this is how Amy felt when I screamed at her, Sonic noted bitterly. This is how she felt every single time I told her to let go of me. This is how she felt every single day I ran past her. This is how she felt at every party that she threw that I refused to go to…
"Rejection."
Sonic sat on the bench and buried his face in his hands.
Rejection. Sorrow. Hurt…
"This is how she felt… every single time." Sonic's teeth clenched against each other. Fresh guilt added to the jumbled of mess in his heart. "Every time…"
Something started beeping, jolting Sonic back to reality. He looked at the source of the noise, it being his wrist-watch under his glove. Tails' had made it for him to contact in case of emergencies since Sonic possessed no cell phone. Sonic made no hesitation in answering Tails' call. With his opposite hand he pressed two buttons on each side of the watch. Tails' face appeared on the screen. He gave Sonic a smile.
"Hey Sonic! What are you up to?"
Sonic gave his best buddy a half-hearted smile. "I got rejected, but nothing too big." He replied honestly, adding a weak chuckle.
Tails' countenance became concerned.
"Wait, what?" he asked.
Sonic shook his head. Not the time, he decided. "Never mind about me," he said, pushing his heart issue aside. He would deal with it later. "Somethin' ya need, buddy?"
Concern remained on Tails' features but he nodded firmly.
"Something happened a couple nights ago with Shadow," Tails replied. "And the Master Emerald."
Sonic's ears perked up.
"Did he steal it?" Sonic asked teasingly.
Tails threw Sonic a humored look. "You know that Shadow isn't like that anymore, Sonic," Tails said. The humored look vanished as quickly as it came. "No it's something else that happened."
Sonic's anxiousness grew.
"What is it?"
"We were going to tell you a couple days ago but Shadow didn't wake up til today so we decided to-" Tails explained.
"We?" Sonic cut in. "And Shadow was unconscious for three days?" He knew that he and Shadow weren't exactly friends, but Shadow was not an easy person to fight. He even admitted that Shadow had almost beaten him at times. Almost, not quite. Regardless, he was a tough opponent when it came to fights, even simple sparring. And if someone had taken Shadow down, this meant bad news. "Tails, what's going on?"
Tails paused. "Well, I think it's best if you run by the workshop and see for yourself. We've got some things to talk about."
Sonic debated this for a moment. Should I stay or should I go…?
Chase after Amy.
What?
You told her yourself you wanted to do the chasing now, didn't you? Prove that you're a man of your word! Go chase after her!
Sonic pondered on this thought. More than anything he wanted to chase after Amy and find out some answers. She just said that she forgave him and that everything between them was fine. Then he gives her the one thing she had been asking for as long as he could remember and she flat out turned him down before running away. She didn't even bother to give him a perfectly good explanation as to why she practically tore out his heart. Sonic sat there debating. His heart then turned cold.
No. He decided as he stood to his feet. He turned back to look at his watch, Tails' anticipated face was looking back at him.
"So, see you in a few minutes?" Tails asked.
No! His inner self cried, incredulous. You just told her that you were going to chase her!
I am not going to chase her down and get rejected even more. Sorry, Sonic thought bitterly. He was not going to put his heart on the line more than he already had. I wasted my time, he decided as he stared out in the direction she ran. Thinking that someone like Amy would fall right back into my arms. She's moving on, now. I lost my chance…The blue hero looked down at the screen and gave a nod to his buddy.
"See you there in a few minutes," he said as he reached up and closed the screen. He covered his glove over his wrist watch once more as he turned in the opposite direction, an indignant look spreading across his face. He could hear his inner conscience screaming at him.
Chase after her!
Stubbornness replaced Rejection...
"No…" Sonic replied as he faced in the direction of Mystic Ruins.
Indignation replaced Sorrow…
He shrugged as he threw his arms behind him.
Frustration replaced Hurt…
He sped off, only leaving a blue streak of light behind him.
Anger replaced Love.
"Guess chasing isn't my thing."
*~.:At Amy's Apartment:.~*
Amy threw herself inside of her apartment, slamming the door behind her in the process. She knew she shouldn't have done it but she did not care. She found herself collapsing to the floor, her legs failing to support her crumbling state. She fell to her knees and began rocking herself. She could no longer hold back the tears fighting her eyes and she finally let them fall. She held her hands against her heart and rocked herself back and forth, back and forth. She leaned forward and rested her head against her knees, no longer having the strength to hold herself up anymore.
It hurts…so bad. She thought as she let herself cry against her knees. My heart… it is filled with so much…
"He confessed and you ran away." A voice came from the corner of her apartment. "He told you something you've craved for years and you basically told him you hated him."
Amy already knew who it was she didn't bother to look up.
A scoff followed.
"Guess he knows how you feel, huh? Every time you've been rejected, now he got a taste of his own medicine."
"He didn't confess anything!" Amy screamed out loud, her eyes squeezed shut. She didn't want to hear this from her right now. Couldn't she see how much pain she was in already? Couldn't she at least pity that she rejected the hedgehog she was in love with? "He wanted to give me a chance!" Amy heaved a heavy sob from her chest. It was too much for her. "That's all I ever wanted was a CHANCE with him!"
"That's right," Evelyn replied as she stepped forward towards her sister but made no effort to comfort her. Instead she remained standing with her arms at her sides and her staring down at her crumbled sister. "And you threw that chance away. You threw away the only chance you had at being with the blue hedgehog."
Amy felt the pain intensify. This was the worst feeling she had ever felt before in her life. Evelyn spoke exact truth: her one greatest desire was practically given to her on a silver platter and she had ever opportunity to grab it. Then she threw it back in his face and ran away. And now, her older sister was standing above her, mocking her pain as if it were nothing. Amy reached up with a shaky hand to wipe away the tears that soaked her cheeks.
"Do you know what that means?" Evelyn asked her, her tone softening.
Amy didn't seem to notice as a scoff escaped her lips.
"No, Evelyn," Amy snapped. "I have no idea what it means…"
Amy heard the sound of rustling fabric in front of her. Amy finally opened her eyes to see Evelyn kneeling in front of her, her eyes fixated on Amy. Amy stared at Evelyn for a long moment, as if trying to figure out what she was going to do. She gasped as Evelyn reached out and grabbed Amy's left ear and pinched it, but not to the point of pain.
"It means," Evelyn began, staring at her sister's ear thoughtfully. "That you are ready."
Amy felt her heart stop.
"That I'm ready for what?"
Evelyn's eyes wandered back to Amy's. She said nothing for a long moment. She released her pinch on Amy's ear and let it drop to the floor. She pushed herself to standing on her feet once more but her eyes remained connected to her younger sister's.
"It means that everything that you have done in these past three days to prepare you for this moment has been successful." She stated. "It means that you are ready to come with me and let me show you the wonders of having Neveian blood flow through your veins." Her almost-softened look became hardened once more. "So whaddya say?" Evelyn's unsympathetic tone returned. "Are you ready to get up from your pathetic state on the floor and leave this wretched life behind for something greater?"
Evelyn made herself clear. "I am not going to beg. But I am going to ask you to decide now." She held out her hand to her. "Since you've lost Sonic, you have nothing else to lose, right?"
Amy felt herself frozen for a split second.
This is for real, she told herself as she reached her hand out and grabbed Evelyn's. And everything I will learn… will be worth the loss.
*~.:Elsewhere, time unknown:.~*
A hooded figure sat on thick branch of an apple tree, his back rested against the trunk and his arms rested on his knees. In his hand was a single pink rose. His white fingers twisted the stem, his focused sapphire eyes observing the pale pink petals of the unique flower. He brought the other hand to stroke the soft petals with his fingers. His focused unwavering he raised the petal to his eyes. His ear twitched at the sound of the earth below him being disturbed softly.
"You can join me if you like," he called although his eyes remained on the rose. As he lowered the rose from his gaze, another hooded figure was crouched before him. Although he could not see the figure's face, he gave a nod of his head.
"S'Lan Cyrus ," he acknowledged.
The being called Cyrus nodded his head firmly before taking a more comfortable sitting position before the other hooded person. He lifted his fingers and drew the hood away from his face, revealing a dark green hedgehog with two long braided quills trailing around his face and resting on his cheeks. He was young, not a tree ring older than fourteen years. His amber eyes were gentle but his facial features were hardened.
"This awaiting arrival is becoming a hassle to the others, S'cn'Kan."
"I know this." The hooded hedgehog replied, his gaze remained on Cyrus .
"Then why are more efforts not being made to ensure that they return safely?" Cyrus 's voice rose steadily, worry escaping his stern features. "S'cn'Kan Kaden, what if something happens to them on the way? What if this Amelia cannot-?"
"T'sai Evelyn will protect her." Kaden cut him off, his sapphire eyes flashing up at the younger hedgehog. "Next to me, T'sai Evelyn is the best saik we have. She will not fail this mission." His hand absentmindedly twisted the rose.
A scoff was heard.
"You are so sure that she will protect her?" Cyrus stated, incredulous. "She did not exactly agree to the Council's decision to return T'cn'Rai Amelia back to us, S'cn'Kan. In fact as I am sure you recall, she was the only one amongst us who was firmly against it." Cyrus 's gaze lowered. "It is almost as if she detests the thought of T'cn'Rai Amelia returning to us…"
"Of course T'sai Evelyn detests T'cn'Rai Amelia," Kaden replied casually. "T'cn'Rai Amelia, although tainted with the s'vusalym blood, she is still one of us. She is a threat to T'sai Evelyn because of who their father was." He twisted the rose before him once more and his eyes fell onto it. His voice fell to a whisper. "And we need her now more than ever before… T'cn'Rai Amelia may be our last hope… "
"But T'sai Evelyn-,"
"Regardless if T'sai Evelyn agrees with our decision, she will respect the Council's decision and she will carry out their orders," Kaden snapped angrily, his warm blue eyes turning cold at the younger hedgehog. "The choice is not hers. She is a servant to the Neveians greater will and purpose. That is her duty. If she has an issue with that, she can take it before the Council."
Cyrus lowered his gaze and he was silent. Kaden sighed before placing a hand on his shoulder.
"You are brave, S'Lan Cyrus , and you are strong." His grip tightened. "But no more questions for tonight. Rest, for soon T'cn'Rai Amelia and T'sai Evelyn will return to us and we will discuss preparations for what we shall do next. Make sure their bedchambers are organized and a feast is ready upon their arrival. They will be brought to us, safely and unharmed." He gave a reassuring smile. "I promise."
"How can you be so certain, S'cn'Kan Kaden?"
"Because…" Kaden paused, obviously was caught off guard by his Cyrus 's question. He released Cyrus 's shoulder and rested his back against the trunk once more. He lifted the rose to his eyes, a soft gaze returning to his eyes. He touched the petals softly a smile gracing his soft features. "There is someone who deeply cares about T'cn'Rai Amelia… and needs her to be here with him…"
END OF CHAPTER 9
Glossary (WHOOT!):
T'cn'Rai – Lady, milady
S'cn'Kan – Lord, milord
S'Lan – the appropriate title name for a young Neveian male warrior
T'sai – the appropriate title for a young Neveian female warrior
saik – word for "warrior"
s'vusalym – the distasteful word for "outsiders"
Cyrus - translated as "young" or "far-sighted"
Kaden - translated as "companion" or "fighter"
Song Inspirations for Chapter Nine:
Departure, Rurouni Kenshin OST
Sadness and Sorrow, Naruto OST
What Hurts the Most, Rascal Flatts
Chasing, DesperationBand
Corina: (groans!) "That was the most frustrating chapter I've ever done before!" (headdesk) "Why was it so hard, dangit!"
Sonic: "Don't ask me. Took you over three months to update."
Corina: (buries face in hands) "I used to be on such a roll! The heck happened?"
Tails: "Uh, the end of the semester happened."
Cream: "As well as the banquet."
Rouge: "Not to forget Christmas and the New Year."
Corina: (wails)
Shadow: "Shut up."
Amy: (smiles) "Who was this new mysterious character?"
Kaden: (still wearing his hood) "That's for me to know and you to find out."
Amy: "I wanna see you without your hood!" (tackles Kaden) "Lemme see! Just a peek!"
Kaden: (laughs) "Not yet! You're just going to have to wait!"
Sonic: (jealous glare)
Knuckles: "Spare me. Just do the disclaimer already."
Tikal: "Corina doesn't own any characters except for the very obvious few – (looks at Evelyn) "as well as the plot and storyline."
Corina: "Dang straight!"
Rouge: "Speaking of which, will you ever…you know... reappear?"
Tikal: (cute smile) (holds up finger) "That is a secret!"
Shadow: (rolls eyes) "A secret you just gave away."
Cream: "Remember to review!"
Corina: "God bless!"
