A/N Thank you so much for all the reviews from last chapter. This is a shorter sadder chapter than usual, I know. I have maybe three or four more chapters of Favors before the sequel. I have some lovely evil things planned so keep favoriting and reviewing please :)
Chapter Nine: The Mission Mattered
Giles had not known what he was thinking bringing Oz here. He feared he had only made things worse. Oz had entered Willow's bedroom hours ago and hadn't emerged yet. Everyone was anxious to find out what had transpired but yet the door hadn't even so much as cracked open.
Faith was perched on the kitchen island, her leather clad legs swinging as she watched Giles worry. "Don't stress yourself out, G Man. Maybe he's turning her straight."
Giles leaned against the counter by the sink. "Faith," he warned.
She held up her hands in surrender. "I'm just messing with ya. You know you missed me."
Spike entered the kitchen with Dawn behind him. "Nibblet is hungry," he announced.
"Can we order pizza while we Willow watch, please?" she begged.
"I'm in," Faith said cheerfully. "I haven't had pizza in ages."
"What? Jail doesn't have pizza?"
"Aren't you like two years old?" Faith replied. "All those annoying baby sister memories had to be made up. There's no way you're that much of a pain in the ass."
Dawn put her hands on her hips. Then her posture relaxed and she extended her hand to the dark haired Slayer. "I'm willing to call a truce."
"Why?" Faith asked wearily.
Dawn shrugged. "Buffy never let me fight with her. Patrol and stuff."
"You want to patrol? You know B would never go for that."
"She's too busy sneaking Spike into her room to notice I'm gone," Dawn said nonchalantly. "Besides I should know how to protect myself. You can teach me."
While Faith shook the young girl's hand in acceptance, Giles was busy cleaning his glasses. "Sneaking who into the what now?" he gasped. "Dear lord I'm starting to sound like her."
Faith hopped off the island and pat a nervous Spike on the shoulder. "Good luck with this one. I'll go check to see if Buffy's hungry."
She found Buffy sitting on the couch in the living room. When Buffy heard Faith enter she put the picture she had been looking at back on the table. "Whatcha looking at?"
Buffy didn't answer. It was an old picture of her , Xander, and Willow from Sunnydale High. Faith picked it up and handed it back to Buffy. She placed it on her lap. "I'm not sure what happens next."
"Well short term...Dawn just spilled the beans about you and Spike to Giles."
Buffy's eyes got wide. "What?"
"Sneaking him into your room like your dirty little secret," Faith teased. "Giles is ripping your boyfriend a new one as we speak."
"He's not my boyfriend," Buffy said immediately. "I mean, we haven't done anything."
"Did you come back blind or something?"
"It's complicated. And we don't have boy talk, Faith."
Faith flopped on the couch next to Buffy. "OK, but I gotta try on this one. Don't be mad at Angel. When he came to tell me about what happened he was really torn up. Said he was going to Sri Lanka or something."
"I'm pretty sure that qualifies as boy talk," Buffy said. But the Faith looked sincere enough that Buffy did feel a pang of guilt. "I'm over it really. It was just a reaction I guess. How about Slayer talk?"
"Ok I can handle that."
"Why do you think the Council has it in for us?"
"My first watcher told me the Council was a bunch of arrogant assholes sending girls to fight their battles. She prepared me to be on my own because I wouldn't really have anyone else. The mission mattered. No friends. No ties to anyone. Don't get me wrong I've always been on survival mode, nature of the beast that is my fucked up life and all but-you were the opposite of all of that. Giles was like a creepy father type. You had people, even a fake sister. I mean the Council has it in for me because I went all rogue Slayer and I was dangerous. Needed to be put down. You though-I never got that one."
"You have people, Faith," Buffy emphasized.
"The mayor was the only person who loved me," Faith admitted softly. Buffy looked at her in surprise then felt a wave of sadness.
"I took that away."
Faith shrugged and bit her lip. "Took me awhile to get it but its cool. He was going to end the world. If I were you I'd have done the same thing. But I don't think we are special. I think we are lucky. We made it this far and pretty much shattered the life expectancy. I mean you grow up. Being a slayer at 16 is different from being a slayer at 20. You see it for what it is and you pick your own battles instead of fighting someone else's."
"I met the first slayer once. In a dream thing with a cheese guy.."
"None of that made sense, B."
"She was angry. I felt it in my bones. She didn't feel human."
"What did she feel like?"
"Familiar. I recognized something inside of her. It connected with me. Primal."
"Sounds hot," Faith joked.
"I miss it," Buffy whispered almost shamefully. "The power. The strength. That primal instinct that there was nothing I couldn't face."
Buffy heard the phone ring and then Dawn was running into the room. Her face was pale and an eerily stoic expression was on her face. "Tara's dead," she choked out. The words were heavy and weighed on Buffy's heart like an anvil.
Then an almost inhuman cry came from the top of the steps. Oz was standing behind a stricken Willow. He went to reach her shaking hand and she shoved him away.
Faith immediately jumped to her feet and started towards Willow. Buffy was behind her and pulled Dawn behind her protectively.
"What happened?" Willow asked in disbelief.
Giles cleared his throat. "The brain swelled. She had a stroke, then an aneurysm."
Spike's eyes met Buffy's hollow ones at his explanation. He already knew all the air had rushed out of her lungs and she was thinking of Joyce.
Willow frantically raced down the steps to find Faith standing between her and the door. "I need to see her."
Faith didn't budge.
"You don't understand. I can bring her back," Willow snarled at her. "I need to. I can fix this."
"Tara would have wanted you to get better. You can't use magic," Giles said as he approached the tense face off.
"Move out of my way," Willow warned Faith.
"I would really like to hit you but I'd prefer not to," Faith sighed.
Buffy stepped in between the two. But her expression wasn't angry or defensive. She had barely made eye contact with Willow in days. She missed her friend underneath everything else and now Willow was moved by the saddest understanding expression in Buffy's eyes. Willow's heart shattered into small pieces and the reality seemed to penetrate her fogged brain. Her determined facade began to crack.
"I know you want to bring her back," Buffy whispered. "Tara loved you. If you want to see her to say goodbye, we will go together. But if you go away now, I don't know how to get you back."
Buffy felt the tears stinging her eyes. She was angry at Willow for what she had done but Buffy had realized there was no normal to get back to if Willow wasn't a part of it. That picture earlier had reminded her of that.
"I killed her," Willow breathed.
Willow's knees gave out and she sunk to the floor as sobs racked her body. Oz started to go towards her but Buffy was already kneeling. She put her arms around Willow who eagerly melted into the embrace.
