Author's Notes: Feed my ego, do more reviews. I'm not going to do the whole "do 5-10 reviews and I'll update a new chapter" bit because I write to unravel a story. Sure, I make this stuff up as I go but it is fun.
Anyways, this chapter is gonna take a while to write. Damn mental blocks. Maybe more inspiration will come through dreams, I don't know. I hope you Rei fans enjoy that I've actually gave Rei a role in this chapter. I'll think about making her part of the cast later.
I know I set a standard for myself the first couple of days when I churned out 7 chapters easily, but these chapters are getting pretty hefty now and I'm finding myself with less free time. It's funny how I originally envisioned this as a dialogue-driven fic, but now it looks more description. No worries, imagery is always fun. It's nice when you can envision the whole scene actually taking place in your head.
Just for this chapter, CAPS are instant messages. I also fail at making up creative usernames.
Disclaimer: I don't own Neon Genesis Evangelion and am writing this fanfic for pure enjoyment.
CHAPTER 9: THE RAIN
It had been a quiet walk to school. It worried Asuka for it to be this quiet. She hated the silence. She always wanted it to be loud and distracting around her. People gossiping about her and she basking in all the attention. She didn't care. Just as long as there was noise. She enjoyed it to the point that she would purposely put on loud music while she read to drown out the construction noises that filtered into her window at home. She couldn't rationalize why she hated the silence sometimes. Maybe it was to really distract her from her self-destructive thoughts. She had started to feel a warm feeling when she was close to baka-Shinji, but ever since that incident with Yahiko, she missed that feeling more and more as he became more withdrawn from the world.
Asuka: At least, he's a friend enough to walk with me to school. Or it maybe he's just doing out of sympathy.
Asuka had once told Shinji how much she hated being alone. That's why they walked together to school for so many years. Even though they usually didn't say much during the walk, she felt comforted that Shinji cared. Shinji cared when her mother didn't care. It was the same with Shinji. His parents didn't have the time to drop him off at school either.
Asuka glanced over at her walking companion. He seemed lost in his thoughts. It was the same for the past week. They would walk in the uneasy silence. Whenever she would look at him, he would have his head down, lost completely to another world. She was impressed that he was even able to avoid the traffic and poles.
In an act of boldness, she brushed her hand up against his, the one that dangled so lifelessly. Her hand tingled like the sensation of electricity, but Shinji didn't react. He didn't even blink. He just continued forward in silence. Asuka was frustrated at her inability to cheer up Shinji. Usually when she wanted something, she could always manipulate the situation to her liking. Right now what she wanted more than anything was to see a smile on her childhood friend. Friend? Was that even the right word? Asuka sighed quietly and relinquished herself to being a zombie like Shinji.
Asuka and Shinji stumbled into their homeroom and instinctively went straight to their seats. As if they were on autopilot, they dropped their backpacks on the floor and slumped into the chair, satisfied to just stare off into space.
Kensuke and Touji looked at the two that had just walked into the class. To even the casual observer, it looked like they were both lost in deep thought. Kensuke and Touji looked at each other and nodded, knowing what they needed to do.
"Yo, Shinji." Touji waved his hand in front of Shinji's face. Shinji blinked but didn't react. Touji tried shaking Shinji's shoulder, hoping that it would snap Shinji out of his trance. Eventually, Touji was able to succeed but not until shaking Shinji as if he were in a seizure.
"What!" yelled a Shinji obviously annoyed with the intrusion into his private thinking time.
"You're doing that dark brooding thing again. Sure, it's cute for the girls once in a while, but if you do it for a week, it becomes pathetic," explained Touji, feeling that he was well versed in the psychology of girls. Shinji didn't respond, choosing to ignore Touji rather than explain what was bothering him. Touji frowned at his friend, upset that he couldn't even get into the head of his best friend. Annoyed by it all, he figured the only way to get through to Shinji was to say something that was so outrageous that it would irritate him.
"Did you and the demon do it and it sucked?" joked Touji. Shinji didn't respond, but Asuka had overheard the conversation and stood up in fury to respond to the baseless accusation.
"WHAT? I would never do something like that with the dumpkoff over there. Look at him! He looks like a wimp, cowering in the corner. If I were naked, he would be so nervous that he would just run away." Asuka was shocked at the words that came out of her mouth. It was a week of frustration in the making, and the insults poured out of her like an open dam. The rest of the class were equally shocked but for different reasons. Many of the girls in the class had heard about the conflict between Asuka and Keiko, during which Asuka had informed Keiko that Shinji was off-limits. As the shock wore off, the class burst into a commotion as girls argued for their right to ask out Shinji. While Shinji wasn't the handsomest boy at the high school, he was by far the nicest. It didn't help that he had many privileges just by being affiliated with NERV.
It was not surprising that most of the class had not noticed that Sensei Fuyutsuki had walked in, dismayed at the commotion. Hikari had noticed and strolled towards the front of the class to do her routine.
"Rise. Bow. Sit." The start of the morning routine had informed the rest of the class that it was time for class, and the conversations died down immediately.
The sensei made a few announcements and then allowed Hikari to mention a few things that she had heard from the weekly representative meeting that she attended every Sunday.
"To celebrate the start of school, the representative committee has decided to host a dance. The dance will be held on school grounds this coming Saturday starting at 5 PM. I encourage all the new students to Tokyo-3 to attend as it will give you the chance to mingle and meet other students." With that announcement out of the way, Hikari made a few mentions of other upcoming events, flashed a smile to the class, and promptly returned to her seat. Out of the corner of his eye, Shinji could see Touji grinning, knowing that the smile was really meant for him. The sensei thanked Hikari and dismissed the class from homeroom early.
Again, the room burst into a cacophony of sounds. The shuffling of seats as people got up was the main contributor, but the talk amongst everyone was the dance. Who were they going bring? Who were their friends going to bring? What should they wear? While the dance wasn't for just couples, many people felt awkward to just go and stand on the sidelines, hoping to be asked for a dance. They'd rather go with someone comfortable or someone they secretly liked, hoping the prospect of going with them to the dance would give them the courage to express their repressed feelings.
Shinji was getting ready to leave for his locker when a hand grabbed his shoulder and pulled him back.
Shinji: Now who could it be?
Shinji spun around, almost knocking over a familiar girl with short blue hair and peculiar red eyes.
Shinji: Who is she? She looks familiar... uh... panties. No wait. Oh god, I can't believe that's the first thing I thought of. No wonder Asuka calls me perverted.
"Uh... Ayanami, right?" Shinji said as he put on a fake smile and scratched the back of his head, hoping that it would help his memory.
Rei nodded in acknowledgement and looked up at a confused Shinji. Shinji was much taller than she was, and she was straining her neck just to look up at him.
"Um... so... I was wondering... you see, we didn't get off to a good start. I, sort of, misjudged you. So... uh, are you going to the dance? I was hoping... to you, know," said Rei as she stumbled over the words, unsure of what to say after misappropriately accusing Shinji on her first day of looking at her panties.
"Get to know me better?" said Shinji, completing her sentence. He smiled, excited that Rei would change her opinion about him. Rei nodded, agreeing to Shinji's statement.
"So... would you go to the dance with me?" Shinji glanced at Rei, taking in the sight of Rei and etching it into his memory. Shinji loved to marvel at the beauty of girls but not in a sexual way. He just enjoyed seeing how beautiful the features on some girls could be. While in his opinion, Asuka was the most beautiful girl at Tokyo-3 High, there was something different about Rei. Asuka's beauty fueled desire within Shinji, something he worked to suppress around her so she wouldn't think that he's perverted. Her radiant red hair looked ready to set his heart on fire, while her cool blue eyes seduced him. Rei looked more like an angel. She looked so fragile yet so perfect. Shinji felt like if he could just hug her, some of her perfection would rub off on him.
"Sure. How could I refuse?" Rei smiled again, flattered by Shinji's comment, knowing that he was being truthful and sincere.
"Do you want to walk me to history?" Shinji hadn't realized that she was in his history class. The first few days of class, he was preoccupied with talking to Asuka, something he had been doing a lot since their shared summer. He spent the next week thinking about the incident with Yahiko. Shinji scanned the room for any signs of a red-headed girl. Asuka had already left for her lockers, unwilling to walk to history with a silent Shinji and choosing the company of Hikari instead.
"Sure. Let me just get my books from the locker." Rei nodded and followed him towards the lockers. Along the way, they talked about their shared history class. Shinji joked about how the teacher never remembered where he was in the lecture material and always seemed to fallback to his backup topic whenever he couldn't remember. Rei listened, excited to hear Shinji's opinion of their class. She came to Tokyo-3 so late in the last semester that she was unable to make any real friends. Even so, it was difficult for her to make friends. Many people found her blue hair and red eyes weird and stayed away from her. The few friends that she had weren't in any of her classes and only talked to her during lunch because they didn't have anything better to do. For once, Rei was excited to talk to someone in such a casual and laidback manner. Shinji wasn't disturbed at all by her blue hair and red eyes. It seemed like he didn't even notice and was treating her like she was a... friend?
As Rei and Shinji passed Asuka in the hallway, Rei noticed the surprise on Asuka's face seeing Shinji talk to her and then noticed a glare directed at her. Rei shrugged it off. She knew that Asuka didn't like her from day one, and she didn't expect someone as stubborn as Asuka to change. Rei turned to continue watching Asuka storm off towards their history classroom. She could make out that Asuka's hands were trembling, clutching the history textbook in her hands.
"Hey, so what are your classes?" asked Shinji, hoping to get something more out of Rei than a very attentive listener.
"Uh... what? Oh. Um. Math, Japanese, History, PE, Biology, and... um..." Rei's voice trailed off as she suddenly forgot what her last class was, but soon her face brightened up as she remembered. "Oh yeah and Music Theory."
"Music Theory?" Shinji's face brightened too as he heard that Rei was interested in music. It felt like it was something that he could share and talk about with Rei without sounding too awkward. Rei smiled as she observed Shinji's reaction to her last class. It seemed that her music class was of some interest to Shinji.
"Do you listen to a lot of music? What kind?" Rei gave Shinji her curious face, happy to find something besides school to talk to him about. Shinji shut his locker door rather loudly causing Rei to jump a little. He gave her an apologetic look and motioned for her to follow him to class.
"Well, mostly classical..." Shinji paused, wondering whether he should share his love for playing his cello with Rei. Shinji had never liked playing for audience, except for maybe Asuka. If he told people, he knew that they would push him to play for them, but he wasn't really comfortable with people hearing him pour his heart out when he played his cello. His cello was the way for him to communicate to the world in a different set of tones. It was his heart singing out loud. For some reason as he looked at the angelic figure next to him, he felt that it was okay to tell her about it.
"But that's because I play the cello." Rei was not surprised that Shinji played a musical instrument. It seemed like all the reserved people did it. Maybe they all used it as a channel to empty their emotions.
"Oh? I play the violin." Rei made the motion of her violin to further convey her point. "Maybe we should play a duet sometime," Rei jokingly suggested, but she was really serious. She would love for them to play something together sometime. It seemed only appropriate for people like them to use music to communicate to each other.
They stepped into their history class, still chatting away about their musical interests, when they noticed the invisible daggers shooting out of their sensei's eyes. They were late, and the history teacher wasn't one who tolerated students being late.
"Ayanami. Ikari. You're both late."
"We're sorry, sensei," they both said in unison.
"Just don't do it again. Please sit." It seemed like the sensei had a soft spot for Rei because she was always so attentive and punctual. It didn't seem right to punish her for a one-time thing, and it didn't seem right to punish her companion either or else it would seem unfair.
Shinji and Rei quietly took their seats and prepared for a long lecture on World War II. It seemed the sensei had already forgotten the topic for the day and had already reverted to her backup topic. It was going to be a long class.
Thankfully for Shinji, his laptop was on the school network. Maybe, he could just entertain himself by browsing his favorite sites. Or not. It seemed that there was nothing relevant at the moment that interested him. The only thing on his mind was how Rei might sound with her violin. He imagined how visually and aurally pleasing she would be. He let his eyes wander around the room in boredom and eventually settled on the back of a girl. A back that was barely touched by her wispy light blue hair.
Asuka also sat in the class bored. She had spent most of the class talking to Hikari about various things like what they were going to do over the weekend. Eventually Hikari gave into her excitement, telling Asuka that Touji had asked her to the dance. Hikari and Touji had been in the same classes forever. Well, maybe not forever, but as long as she could remember her and Shinji being in the same class. Ever since they became close friends, Hikari would talk about her dreams of being with Touji some day. It seemed like that day was coming soon.
Asuka: I wonder if I'll find someone like that for me to be with... Ah... Kaji...
HEHEKARI: So are you going to the dance?
RED124: maybe
HEHEKARI: Why not?
RED124: noone to go with
HEHEKARI: Why not ask him?
RED124: who
Asuka knew fully well who Hikari was talking about. That was probably why Hikari was her friend. She could read Asuka like an open book. Not even him, dumpkoff, could do that.
HEHEKARI: Shinji
RED124: sure i guess but i was hoping he would ask me first
HEHEKARI: How would he know that you want to go? You've never liked to go to social gatherings before.
RED124: i dunno he IS an idiot
HEHEKARI: Well, you better hurry up, I hear that a lot of people are interested.
RED124: wait A LOT OF PEOPLE?! interested in that DUMPKOFF!?
RED124: like who?
HEHEKARI: Keiko
RED124: thats obvious ill kick her ass
HEHEKARI: Mitsuki, Ai, Nanako, Reina, Sakura, Misaki, Chihiro, Hina, Kana, Saki
Asuka couldn't believe that that baka-Shinji had garnered such a huge fan club of girls. Girls who were interested in him. Girls who threatened to steal her baka-Shinji from her.
Asuka: I'll win. Because I'm Asuka Soryu Langley!
Asuka grinned when she thought about all the grim situations from which she won in the end. Winning Shinji was just the same.
HEHEKARI: Should I name more?
RED124: i get it ok? ill ask him afterschool
Asuka had a feeling that everything was going to be alright. She would ask him after school. He would say yes, and they would have a fun time on Saturday like any other Saturday when they hung out. It was easy to say for her because Asuka knew that Shinji had rejected all those girls before, hoping not to get into a Mitsuki situation again. She grinned. Maybe dances weren't so bad after all.
She looked to her left to see what Shinji was up to. She had hoped that he would be in a better mood when he walked into the class talking very excitedly to Rei.
Asuka: Why was he talking to Ayanami anyways? I thought she hated him.
Shinji seemed to be staring off into space. Asuka just couldn't seem to figure out what the hell was so interesting about the left wall when she realized something.
Asuka: He's not staring at the wall. He's staring at Ayanami. What the hell is going on?
Hoping to distract Shinji and maybe figure out whether he was in a better mood, she fired off a quick message to him.
RED124: baka what are you doing
The light beep on Shinji's laptop went off to notify Shinji of a new message. It was quiet enough so that only Shinji and those close enough to him could hear it so he could message without drawing the attention of the teacher. He looked at the corner of his screen to see who it was from. It was Asuka. He just wasn't up to the task to talking to Asuka. What if she wanted to talk about the incident again? Or wonder why he was being like this? No, this was something he needed to deal with by himself. Deciding to ignore Asuka, Shinji closed his laptop and decided to stare at the clock, hoping that he had the ability the turn the clock forward another 6 minutes so that the class would end.
He felt his stomach growl again. He forgot to eat breakfast again, and his stomach was threatening to beat him up for it. He stared at the clock again. It hadn't even moved 15 seconds. Resigning himself to the fate that he just didn't have superpowers, Shinji hid his head behind the history textbook, hoping to enjoy maybe 6 minutes of sleep. He was already drowsy from hearing the droning of his history teacher so it wasn't surprising that he collapsed into his dreamland so easily.
Still chatting to Hikari, Asuka had finally realized that Shinji was taking an awful long time to respond her. She had expected a message from SHINJI within the minute that she sent the message. He was usually a quick responder, just not the best at picking a creative username. She looked to her left and frowned. She hadn't expected Shinji to just close the laptop and sleep. Usually in his depressing moods, he would at least respond with something out of respect, but today, he didn't even bother.
Asuka looked up at the clock and sighed. There was still another 5 minutes until class was over. Until she could get out of the hellhole called history class.
Asuka trudged towards her locker. It had been a long day especially after the droning history lecture put her in a bad mood. Normally she was excited to go to Physics Lab, but today, she found it even more difficult than usual to work with Shinji. It was like his depression was rubbing off on her.
Asuka: If he was even more depressing, it would rain in the classroom.
And then there was Computer Science. She had spent the whole class doing the assignments for the next month. She couldn't see how it was that difficult to grasp the concept of recursion. Yet, the sensei found it necessary to spend the whole week's lectures on it. If there was one thing that she looked forward at the end of the day, it was to see Shinji lighten up at the prospect of going to the dance with her.
Asuka: Of course, he'd be happy. He's going with the most beautiful girl in all of Tokyo-3.
Asuka rounded the corner that came up to her locker. Shinji was already there placing his books into his locker. His locker that was just right next to hers. She stopped in front of Shinji and looked at him. His face held no expression. No expression at all.
"Shinji?"
"Yeah?" His voice didn't exactly drip of enthusiasm, the way it did when she usually talked to him.
"So I felt it appropriate for you to take me to the dance. So let's go together on Saturday, okay?" Asuka had found it appropriate to get it out in the open so that Shinji wouldn't have to muck around her usual round-about way of talking.
"I can't." Again, coldly.
"Why not? You can't make it to the dance?" Asuka was puzzled. It wasn't often that Shinji rejected the chance to hang out with her, let alone the chance for him to go to the dance with her.
"I'm going with Ayanami." Shinji pulled out an umbrella from his locker. It had just started to pour outside, and he always kept an umbrella in his locker just in case. He always claimed that weather could be very spontaneous so it was good to be prepared.
"Oh." Asuka couldn't bear to look at Shinji anymore. She felt so empty for some reason. And that void seemed to expand, pushing her away from Shinji. She turned away from Shinji and ran off. Shinji felt bad for rejecting Asuka, but he felt he couldn't go back on his acceptance to go with Rei.
Shinji: She doesn't like these things anyways.
Shinji watched the flair of red hair disappear around the corner, assuming that her running away meant he didn't need to walk her home today. He felt weird about it because it seemed to be the first time that he had walked home alone while it was raining. Asuka, in the past, had always walked home with him when it rained because she never brought an umbrella. It was too clunky she claimed. He turned and headed towards the entrance of the school but stopped at the entrance as he noticed a familiar girl standing in front of the door. It was Rei, and it seemed like she didn't have an umbrella.
"Hey, don't lean so far out, you'll get wet," said Shinji as he moved to shield Rei from the rain.
"Thanks, Ikari."
"Shinji's fine. Do you want me to walk you home?" Shinji asked, motioning at the umbrella in his hand.
"Thanks, Shinji," said Rei as she looked up at Shinji and smiled, acknowledging his generous gesture.
Asuka felt pain shoot up her shoulder as she collided into an object in the hallway.
Asuka: No, wait, it's a person.
It was Hikari.
"Hey Asuka, did you ask him yet?" Hikari never mentioned Shinji by name to Asuka out of respect. Hikari knew that Asuka cherished her reputation, and if people overheard Hikari asking Asuka whether she had asked the boy that she frequently belittled to a social gathering for couples, her reputation as the red-headed demon would be tarnished.
Hikari examined Asuka's face, noticing that she was staring at the entrance to the school. She followed Asuka's example and turned to see her object of interest. It was Shinji, walking out of school while holding an umbrella over Rei. Hikari realized why Asuka had a look of pain on her face. They were silent for a while as they watched Shinji disappear out of view. She then reached out to comfort Asuka when Asuka suddenly burst into a full sprint out of the school, turning only to yell back at Hikari.
"Sorry, Hikari. I'll see you tomorrow." Hikari could do nothing but watch as her hurt friend ran off into the rain. The cold and depressing rain.
Asuka thought that if she ran through the rain, it would metaphorically wash away her sorrow. It only seemed to add to it. She could feel her eyes well up with tears but she couldn't tell whether they were actually flowing as the rain intermingled with the potential tears on her face, threatening to obscure her vision.
End Notes: This was actually going to be a long chapter, but I realized that the next part would be just as long so rather than making a super-sized chapter, I think I'd rather release this angst bit for now. This chapter was originally called "The Dance," but I felt it was inappropriate after the proofread since the dance never actually occurred in this chapter.
