Epilogue
Absolution
Kenshin sat alone in the room he shared with Kaoru. His wife had not yet come back from the other dojo and it was more than likely that she would stay there for the night. It was a common occurrence, nothing to worry about. In front of the man, on the tatami, a sheathed sword. His sword. He looked at it, not daring to touch it. How long had it been since he had last yielded it. His sword. Not so anymore for he had given it to Yahiko when the boy had come of age. It was usually displayed in the dojo for all to see, for all to understand that the Kamiya style was to be used to protect life, not take it. Kenshin smiled inwardly. How funny that his and Kaoru's style had met when they should have never. The sakabato had been the key. Without it, Kenshin would have gone on killing and would probably have ensed up like Shishio at the end of the revolution. How many had he killed before the sakabato? He had lost count. Too many, for sure.
Kenshin looked outside. The moon shine brightly, the sky without a cloud. A calm night, perfect for sailing, he thought. Looking back at his sword, he took it in his hands and unsheathed it. The sharp blade reflected the bleak light of the night. Had he yielded it earlier, would he have been able to make Yumiko's life easier? Could he have been a father to his son and daughter? Probably not. It had not been meant to be. Yet, he had been happy to see the girl. What a fair girl, and smart, too. She may be blind, but she saw much. He felt a pang of sadness at the thought of losing her so soon after having found her. Yet, he knew that Yumiko had made the right choice and he didn't resent her decision. Had the two of them stayed around, his peaceful life with Kaoru would have been disturbed beyond repair. The past and the present were not to be reconciled. Kenshin looked at his reflection in the blade then sheathed it with a sharp movement. He would return it to its original position before Kaoru got home.
Kenshin got up and walked to the veranda where he sat, his feet dangling. Then, slowly he leaned back to look at the moon. Before long, images of the day came back dancing in his mind. After Yumiko had told him that they were leaving the same evening, he and she had remained crying silently for a while. He had wanted to ask her many thing, to ask her for their address in the Netherlands, ask her to write to him, to send him pictures of Ai, but he had remained quiet. His heart's desire were not to be voiced. Surely, Yumiko had had similar thoughts but she, too, had remained silent. Kenshin had lost sense of time and when he gotten up to leave, he hadn't been sure how long he had spent sitting on the tatami, lost in thoughts. He and the woman had exchanged polite salutations and wishes of good health. He had seen in her eyes the hurt and a strong will. She had been holding back tears, but something else as well. He couldn't say what but he presumed that it was a desire similar to his own. He had wanted to take her in his arms and hug her. Hug her once last time but also, in a way, for the very first time. But both of them had remained still and so, Kenshin had left without giving her the satisfaction of knowing that he had finally understood her feelings for him. Of Ai, there hadn't been a trace. His daughter had probably left with her future husband.
Kenshin had wandered the streets of Tokyo aimlessly for a while, not wanting to go back home with his red eyes and his grief stricken face. Before he knew it, he had found himself at the Senso-ji. The place bustled with people and yet, he felt completely alone and anonymous. After walking here and there without really looking where he was going, he had found a nice bench under a willow tree, away from everything and everyone. There, he had cried. He had cried silently at first, then the sobs had come. He usually would have held them back, but he just hadn't cared. His heart had been heavy as lead and he hadn't wanted to carry this burden anymore, not even a step further. Some people had passed by looked at him with reprieving eyes. A grown man crying alone in public! What a sight he must have been. But what had he cared? He had had nothing to prove to the world. After a while, his tears had dried out and peacefulness had overcome him. Wiping his face with his sleeve and blowing his nose with his handkerchief, he had gotten up and walked away. This time, he had known where he was going. He was going home to his wife and child. Back to the present.
Nevertheless, he had been happy to see that Kaoru wasn't home when he had arrived. His eyes were still quite red and he had a head splitting headache. He had left Kenji in Yahiko's care and had gone to bed to wake up in the middle of the night. And so there he was, gazing at the moon, feeling at peace with himself yet a little melancholic.
What a life he had lived! What life would he live from now on? Only the stars and the moon knew, and they kept their secret oh so very well...
