Okay, a few things: First, I still don't own anything or anybody - unfortunately!

Second, I am back to work, which means updates will come at much longer intervals now, please bear with me, I am not going to abandon this story or my loyal readers and reviewers, I am already working on the next chapter, but I do not know yet when it will be ready for posting, hopefully in a few days.

Third, thank you all for your support, I do not know what I would do without you!

Anyway, as some of you have already suspected, the romance is not progressing as smoothly as Christine might have hoped, complication number two is rearing its ugly head, and yes, I do feel bad for making you wait a few days till you can learn more about Erik's plans or Christine's reaction, but unfortunately my job once again will occupy most of my time.

Chapter 9 – Flight

Slightly over three weeks had passed since Erik had regained consciousness. Physically he was making good progress. His wound had pretty much healed, he did not have to wear his arm in the sling anymore, he was back to eating normal food and he was out of bed again. He was strong enough to walk around the house, but he still tired easily.

Erik's emotional well-being was a different problem, though. He had to admit that he could not have asked for a more devoted and loving nurse than Christine. She was always there when he needed something, at first she had fed him, when he had still been too weak to hold a spoon, then she had read to him, sung him to sleep, later on, when he had made his first uneasy steps again, it had been her shoulder to support him and her arm wrapped around his waist to guide him. If there had not been their back story of betrayal, of her love for the handsome young Vicomte, he would have almost believed in the sincerity of her feelings. But despite her open show of affection he could not convince himself that she had really chosen him and preferred him to that de Chagny boy. Even though the Vicomte was never mentioned in his presence Erik had overheard a few words between the three ladies and knew that the latter was still counting on marrying Christine. To Erik that was proof enough that the Vicomte was still certain of her love. Surely, he would not endure the problems this unsuitable marriage to a performer would cause him in society, if the woman in question did not really want him? No, Erik understood perfectly. Christine loved the Vicomte, but pitied him, her poor, sick Angel.

That was not to say, though, that he did not enjoy her attention. Quite the contrary. Erik basked in Christine's affection, he drank in every word of love, relished every caress, every physical contact, every smile, every loving gaze of her wondrous brown eyes. He realized that he was getting used to being showered with love by her. He would miss that once she was gone. This time losing her would be even harder, since he had now had a taste of heaven, he now knew how it felt to have a loving companion at his side. His solitude would be even greater now. Every day passed under her loving administrations made it harder to imagine life without her again. He would have to let go of her pretty soon or he would not be able to do it anymore. He would have to get out of her life once and for all so that she could go back to her fiancé and marry that young boy. But where would he go? He was not yet quite strong enough to live on his own. He could not yet go back to his lair. Suddenly an idea struck him. There was one place he could go to – now there was such a place again.

Xxx

Mme. Giry had a light sleep. When she woke around two in the morning, she was certain she had heard a sound, like footsteps in the hallway, that had caused her to wake up. She silently put on her robe, opened her door and carefully looked out. She gasped. There was a shadow standing in front of the door to Christine's bedroom. Thoughts of a break-in, of robbers looking for valuables, of the Vicomte sending his men to abduct an unwilling Christine, and similar scenarios chased each other in her mind, when her eyes finally adjusted to the darkness and she recognized Erik. To her surprise he was fully clothed and wearing the mask that Meg had brought back with her the night of the fire.

"Erik, what are you doing out in the hallway at this time of the night?" she whispered. There was no point in waking Christine and Meg as well. Erik seemed embarrassed and at a loss of words. He cursed inwardly. He had not expected anybody to hear him. He was so out of practice! Before his illness nobody would have heard him sneak around at night! Mme. Giry was aware of his unease. Had he tried to enter Christine's bedroom? If so, why? She was absolutely certain he had not been planning anything – indecent. He had always treated Christine with utmost respect and she knew that no matter how much he loved Christine, he would not touch her unless they were properly married. But Erik definitely behaved as if he had been caught doing something that was not quite right. She now realized that he was holding something in his hand, something small and white – a letter?

"Erik, you'd better go back to bed now," she admonished him. "You can give that to Christine tomorrow. There is no point in waking her right now." Erik suddenly seemed to decide on what to do. "Antoinette, please, I need your help. You will let me leave your home now. And you will give this letter to Christine tomorrow. It will explain everything." Mme. Giry was confused. What was going on here? Why did he want to leave? Did it have something to do with Christine? If so, she could not imagine what. To her the two had seemed like they were perfectly happy together. And where was he planning to go anyway? Did he not remember what living in the streets for ten days had done to him recently?

"Erik, are you out of your mind?" she hissed at him. "What do you think you are doing? Why do you want to leave?" Only after having spoken those words, did she remember that the two girls were sleeping and that it would not help to wake them as well. "Come down to the parlor with me," she told Erik more calmly. "We have to talk, but I do not want to wake Meg and Christine." Erik nodded and followed her downstairs.

Once they were both seated in the parlor, Mme. Giry faced Erik. "So, now you can tell me what this is all about. Start at the beginning. At this time of the night I am not good at solving riddles or making logical conclusions," she began.

Erik looked at her, he was obviously ill at ease and not quite sure how to start. "It's Christine," he finally blurted out. "She is treating me so well, she is so kind to me, she caresses me and smiles at me... and I am so getting used to her display of affection." Mme. Giry shook her head. Surely that was not a problem? She smiled at him. "Erik, I know that her feelings for you have changed and that you enjoy her attention. I have seen the two of you together over the past few weeks, and things are going well between you and Christine. It would be rather strange if you felt differently about her. Unless, of course, you do not love her anymore."

He looked at her in shock. "You know that that will never happen. She was my first love and she will be my last one. There will never be anybody else in my heart." Mme. Giry squeezed his hand reassuringly. "Of course, I do know that Erik. So, where is the problem? You love her, she loves you, you are happy about her affection – to tell you the truth, Meg and I have been waiting for an engagement for a few days now." A tortured look crossed Erik's expressive eyes. "That is exactly the problem. I cannot propose to her again, I love her too much. In her current mood she might even accept and make us both unhappy. I know the Vicomte is waiting for her. No, don't deny it, Antoinette, I have heard you and the two young ladies talking, when you thought me in my room. I know that deep down it is him she loves. She may think right now that she loves me," he continued, "but she doesn't". God, she certainly acted as if she did, but he knew better. He had seen her on that rooftop last fall.

Mme. Giry was beginning to understand. Obviously his inferiority complex was getting the better of him again, he was considering himself somehow unworthy of Christine's love and therefore doubted the sincerity of her feelings. And he also seemed to have no trust in Christine. She had to admit that considering Christine's earlier indecision and her "betrayal" - the fact that she had unmasked him in front of the whole audience – she could understand – sort of - that he had lost his trust in her. She had hoped, though, that he would be able to forgive Christine and trust her again, because she had also seen how Christine had lavished him with attention and proofs of her love, how she had never tired during his long convalescence and always been there for him. If that had not convinced him of Christine's true feelings for him, what would?

"Erik, I think I understand your problem now," her voice was very composed and she tried to put a lot of weight into every single word. "I can see why you feel like you have to doubt Christine's feelings for you. With all your back story this is to be expected. But you have to believe me, she really does love you, only you. You should have seen her, when that smug Vicomte told us his people had shot you and that you were as good as dead. She was livid at him – and worried sick at the same time. She was afraid that she had discovered her true feelings too late, that she would not be able to tell you anymore how much she loves you." Erik interrupted her. "That is exactly the problem. She felt guilty for what had happened to me. She felt responsible. After all, her young man would not have had his people shoot at me, had it not been for her. Because he feared I might get between them again and he wanted her to himself. Even though I had promised to leave them alone... Anyway, she felt guilty and she pitied me. She saw me as the victim of her boy's jealousy. Yes, she may also have been angry with him – I do seem to remember that she hates violence – so in her anger she probably decided that she would turn to me now. Maybe she has even convinced herself that it is me she loves. But I know that all she can ever feel for somebody like me is pity." Mme. Giry was at a loss what to say. She had the feeling that nothing would convince him. That this doubt was deeply rooted in his mind and that he was determined to leave.

"Erik, why don't you give the two of you some time?" she suggested. "Christine does deserve a second chance with you. I know, if you leave her now she will be devastated. She is waiting for your proposal." She saw the pained look on his face and sighed. "I understand that with your doubt and your lack of trust in her you do not feel like asking her again to marry you. But why do you want to leave? Why do you not wait and see if your lost trust in her cannot be reestablished?" God, what would Christine say, when she woke up tomorrow morning and Erik was gone? The girl would be heart-broken, and worried about him, to boot. Though he was much better, he was not fully recovered yet. Who knew how he would be doing on his own under these circumstances? She needed to make him stay, but how? She sighed. She did not know for which of the two she was more sorry right now – for the girl who had lost her beloved's trust or for the man who was plagued with doubts regarding his woman's love. The two were so obviously very deeply in love with each other, and yet right now it seemed as if their relationship was doomed.

Erik shook his head. Desperation was creeping into his voice. "I cannot, Antoinette," he stammered. "If I stay any longer I will never be able to release her. It may already be too late. I am getting so used to having her around, of her to surround me with this semblance of affection. It tortures me to think she will realize soon that she is in error about her feelings and that she wants to return to her boy. I have to go while I am still able to bear losing her and her affection. Before it will become impossible for me to be without her after the heavenly dream I have been living for the past few weeks." He was pleading with her now, tears welling in his expressive, blue eyes. "Please, Antoinette. If I don't go now I will never find the strength to leave, but I owe it to Christine to set her free. If I stayed I would lose all self-respect."

Mme. Giry sighed in frustration. He was not going to listen to her. She tried a different approach. "Erik, you know that I cannot let you go. You are much stronger now, but you still need some rest. Where would you go? Back to the Opera and your lair? You must consider the possibility that it is still guarded, that the Vicomte has laid a trap for you there. It may also be uninhabitable. We do not know how badly the fire and the mob have damaged it. You are probably also aware of the fact that you cannot go to an inn or hotel either. You would be recognized immediately. As to going back to live in the streets... it may be warmer outside now, but you are still coughing a bit, your lungs have not quite healed. You would kill yourself."

Erik looked her in the eyes. "Do not worry about that, Antoinette," he said. "I have considered every option. I do have a place I can go to. I will even be able to rest there. I will be fine." As if he could be fine without Christine, he thought glumly.

Mme. Giry surrendered. He was not going to stay. Unless he got some irrefutable proof that Christine's heart truly belonged to him, he would not be able to trust her again. Since that was the way things were, it was probably really for the best if he left. Maybe a short period of separation would help him realize what a fool he was. If he saw how Christine remained faithful to him even if he was gone, that might tell him something about her true feelings. Christine would suffer, though, it would hurt her to know that Erik did not trust her anymore. But unlike Erik, at least Christine knew that she was loved. One last thought crossed her mind. "Erik, what did you tell Christine in that letter you want to leave for her? Be gentle with her, it will hit her hard to learn that you left because you do not believe in her love. She will be heartbroken in the morning," she said.

"Antoinette, you know that I could never hurt Christine. I told her that I love her with all my heart and that therefore I am doing what is best for her, allowing her to live the happy life she has always wanted with her Vicomte." Mme. Giry thought that he might well never hurt Christine intentionally, but the content of this letter would break her heart nevertheless. At least he said he had mentioned that he loved Christine. That would have to make do for the moment. Erik hesitated. "And give her this as well," he said, removing the ring from his neck. "It was her boy's engagement gift to her. I took it from her by force at the masquerade, I told her that her chains were still mine. They are not anymore. I am releasing her. I am returning her to her rightful fiancé." Mme. Giry promised to give Christine that message. She knew Christine would love to have that ring back – not for the reasons Erik assumed, though. For Christine that ring had long ceased having any connection to her first engagement. It had turned into the symbol of her second engagement, the only one she considered valid now. The one engagement for which she had actually worn the ring on her finger as is fitting for an engagement ring.

"Erik, please promise me to stay in touch," she asked of him. "Christine will want to know that you are doing fine. I am still not convinced that you have to go, I do know that Christine's love for you is strong and deep and will overcome any adversity. I do hope that sooner or later you will learn to accept that fact, even though right now you cannot. I will pray for the two of you. You belong together, and," she smiled at him, "I am still thinking that sooner or later I will be able to attend your wedding." Erik just looked down. He obviously had no such hopes.

"Since you are determined to go, you might as well leave while it is still dark," she continued. "It will be safer for you." Erik nodded and rose. "Take care of Christine for me, Antoinette," he whispered, fighting back tears. "Tell her, I want her to be happy. That is all that matters to me, because I love her." Mme. Giry thought that he was right now doing his best to make Christine unhappy, and himself as well, but she smiled at him nevertheless. "She knows that, Erik. And it makes her very happy." He made his way to the front door and she let him out. She sighed. This was a complicated case. But she knew beyond any doubt that both, Erik and Christine, were very much in love with each other, and she was still convinced, that no matter what, love would find its way. Somehow, some day, these two would find happiness together. She only hoped for both their sakes it would be sooner rather than later.