Summary: Edward runs into Bella and Jacob while he's with Esme, which leads to questioning from his family and an epiphany of his own.

Rating: T, for language, snarky attitudes and maybe a little inappropriateness.

Word Count: Almost 4k. Yay, a shorter chapter! I'm saved from carpal tunnel…for now! :D

DISCLAIMER: Don't own Twilight, sorry.

WARNING: There is Bella bashing in this chapter so don't go complaining in a review if you don't like it.

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She's so jealous! Rosalie was mentally shrieking in joy.

Edward had been his siblings chauffeur around most of town and usually just waited in the car. That day, he had brought them to the mall in Seattle, where the girls went off shopping and the boys went to Best Buy. Apparently Bella had also chosen this day to go as well, and it hadn't been pretty.

Against his will, Edward saw all that had happened when they girls had been in a DSW store, though why they thought they needed more shoes he didn't know. Alice had decided she wanted Lyra in their lives as much as possible, so they had met up. They had been trying on some shoes, showing them off and all that girly stuff, when Bella had walked past holding a box of tennis shoes.

Bella froze the moment she saw them. She would have ignored them, had Lyra not popped up from behind on of the shoe-organizing half-walls. The minute they saw each other, all the laughing stopped. An awkward moment had passed with them just staring at each other, and then Bella's eyes narrowed and her lips tightened.

Even Edward, from an outside view, could tell she was jealous. Rosalie took great pride in this fact, and the whole way home it was mildly grating on his nerves. But something else was distracting him as he wove down the empty road to their house.

That memory had been the first time Edward had seen Bella since he had looked through Carlisle's eyes the time she had come to the house to apologize. It had been like a hit to his gut from Emmett; it didn't hurt, with his granite skin, but it ached slightly. His breathing hitched quietly at first but quickly returned to normal.

For the first time, thinking of Bella didn't make him angry or sad. It made him feel embarrassed. Not only because of how he had fawned over her and what other people thought of their relationship, but also because she was jealous of her friend because of him and his family. He was used to human jealousy, mostly; all the girls at school that fantasized about him and his brothers were envious because they could never have them, whatever the reason. They were lucky none of them appealed to any of his family members.

They all clambered out of his Volvo and dashed off to their own devices, like normal. Even in bleak, rainy Forks, they had to be careful in the summer; believe it or not, the sun actually shone a few times.

But his day was to be ruined, because Esme decided they needed mother-son time. Which apparently meant going to the grocery store. Together.

Edward wasn't fussy about his activities, especially if it pleased his mother-figure, but this was one thing he hated, one of the few things that made him act like a common teenage boy. He knew they had to do it, but he really didn't want to.

As they strolled through the aisles, getting human necessities they didn't need, Edward felt his phone vibrate. He expected it to be from Lyra, since she was the only one who ever texted him, but it was from Alice.

Beware, that shopping trip is going to get nasty, was all it said. He was about to ask why, but the moment he looked up, he knew. The screaming thoughts 20 feet away didn't help.

Because there, across the fruit section, stood Bella and Jacob, hand in hand. Jacob had seen, or probably smelled him, and was glaring; Bella on the other hand hadn't noticed, but he guessed from Alice's message that she was about to.

"Esme," he ground out between lips that were pressed together, trying to be discreet in his warning. Of course she looked up at him curiously; it was times like these that he wished the non-gifted members of his family knew how to hold a silent conversation.

She looked over his shoulder as her gaze wandered habitually and froze, making Edward wince as he saw his mother's and Bella's eye contact through the thoughts of the vampire in front of him.

Crap.

"Oh lord," Esme whispered under her breath. Bella was marching over to them and Alice's message was clear: Bella was going to start something. How unattractive.

"Edward," she greeted curtly.

"Bella, Jacob," he replied coolly, shifting so he was partially in front of his tiny mother-figure.

"What are you doing here?" Her and Jacob both crossed their arms at the same time in an eerie mirror image.

"I would have thought that was obvious." He found it easy to be terse with her now; the thought of Bella no longer held any appeal or emotion for him, except maybe a slight twinge of pain for his family or anger now and again.

Jacob's eyes narrowed at his tone.

"Really? That seems like a waste now doesn't it? But I guess you do like to spend your money," she replied snottily. Everybody's eyes, except Bella's, widened. She had never, ever cared about anything like that, even before they had been together. He knew from the slightly smug look on her face that she could tell what he was thinking.

"Well, unlike some people, we're responsible." He looked shortly at Jacob, then back to her. He had heard of the 'bear' sightings all around town and down in the surrounding areas. He also meant it for Bella, in reference to Lyra. "How's Lyra by the way? Or have you even bothered to talk to her since you found your mutt?" he hissed. Jacob's thoughts were getting protective and Esme's were getting worried. She was just as mad at Bella as he was, but didn't want to show it.

"You tell me. You two seem to be awfully friendly."

"Maybe that's because she needs someone, and her best friend wasn't there to do the job."

"Well, if you're mad about that, why don't you tell your bitch of a sister to leave her alone. She'll be safer that way right?" Bella mocked. Now everybody was shocked, even Jacob.

Bella had never been one for language or derision, but here she was, out in public, saying it in front of her boyfriend to her ex-boyfriend and his gentle-as-a-feather mother.

"You should know, you're the masochist." He sneered. Esme's thoughts were half scolding and half worried. She didn't like his language or tone, even though she felt nearly the same way. And they were starting to attract attention.

"Really? What happened to being the stupid little lamb?"

"It's more like the dumb sheep now, since a wolf's come into play."

"Stop it! Both of you!" Esme nearly shouted. Edward was glad too; they had been bickering like children, yet he hadn't wanted to stop. He wanted to make her feel all the pain she had caused him and his family. "You're acting like children. Edward, you shouldn't talk to someone like that and Bella, you have no right to accuse him of anything when you're the one who ruined your relationship with him and us!"

Bella stared, star-eyed shocked, at Esme. She didn't know Esme very much, but she knew that this wasn't like her. The pain and hurt shone brightly in Esme's eyes and she marched away with their shopping cart. Even Jacob looked sympathetic toward Edward's mother.

"I hope you're finally happy," he snapped at her and marched away after his upset mom, leaving Bella behind.

Hopefully, it would be the last time he ever saw her.

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Silence filled the house as everybody listened and watched as Esme deftly put the useless groceries away. They all could tell something was wrong, but only Edward and Alice knew firsthand.

What happened? Why is Esme so upset? Jasper asked him, feeling upset as well because of the heavy waves of distress their mother was radiating.

Edward just nodded his head.

"I'm going hunting. Edward, will you come with me?" Her tone told him it wasn't optional.

They ran 30 miles toward the Canadian border, until Esme finally stopped. She took down two deer and a small black bear before she finally turned to look at him as he watched silently.

"Edward," she started, but he held up his hand. He knew what she was going to say, it was clear as day on her face.

"Esme, wait. I'm sorry I acted the way I did; I know it was inexcusable to say those things and that it embarrassed you in public. It won't happen again. I just…I wanted Bella to know the pain she had caused all of us, because I know it wasn't the only one that was hurt. It killed all of us to see you sad because she left," he explained desperately; Esme was the one person he could not stand to see in any margin of grief.

"I've just never seen you act that way," she breathed sadly. "I know this recent chain of events had changed you, but I never expected that. The worst I've ever heard you say is when you swear at Rosalie under your breath whenever she makes you mad. I understand your feelings, all of us do, and I wish I could do something about it, but putting someone down with harsh words is never the answer." Carlisle's philosophy spewed from her lips as if she were a therapist or counselor for juveniles.

"I don't know what came over me."

"Were you jealous? Of Jacob?" The distaste was obvious in her voice, even though she used his name, which made Edward laugh.

"No, I wasn't. In fact, I'm fairly certain I'm…past this whole thing. Maybe not completely, but mostly. I was blind to the side of Bella that could come out sometimes, the one that would hurt people, intentionally or not. I feel like a fool." The way he had fawned and hovered over her every second they were together…for once he shared Mike Newton's disdain for his previous relationship.

"You're most certainly not a fool Edward, don't ever think that. I just want you to promise me that that was the last time you'll ever speak that way to anyone. No one deserves that, even if someone thinks they do."

"I know. I'm sorry and I promise." He walked over and kissed her cheek. "Anything for you."

She smiled, and suddenly her grin was devious.

"Speaking of girls you know," she started. Oh God. "Lyra seems to be popping up more and more." He groaned and she laughed loudly, teasingly.

"Why does everybody keep asking me that?"

"Well darling, she's a girl, you're a boy and you're both spending time with each other. You used to ignore humans as if they were just dust floating by your head. Now all of a sudden you're talking to one that would be irrelevant otherwise. We've all noticed."

"Look Esme," he trailed off for a few seconds, exasperated by his family's nosiness. "You're right, I probably wouldn't be friends with her," Esme's grin widened at the mention of 'friends'. "But I met her through Bella and now Bella is gone, but Lyra needed help. Just because a certain person was out of the picture, doesn't mean I would just completely isolate myself. I couldn't; I couldn't just turn away when she needed my help. Besides, if you want someone to blame, talk to Rosalie. She's the one who started bringing her over."

His mother stared at him, her giant smile downsizing until it was a happy upturn of her lips.

"All right, I won't bug you. We all just want you to be happy Edward. Besides; you've fallen in love with a human before, anything is possible." She brushed by him and touched his shoulder affectionately before running back toward the house.

He waited until he could no longer hear the sounds of her running to follow, so she wouldn't see his uncertain eyes.

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When they arrived home, Edward had nearly an identical conversation with Carlisle. Damn vampire hearing; all of his siblings were teasing him now, though this time around Rosalie wasn't shouting profanities at him in her head.

After an hour of taking crap from his family, he decided to go for a much needed run. It let him get away from his family, and it gave him time to think.

Pretty soon, he found himself sitting by the ponds again.

The thing Edward hated the most about his family was this; sometimes they were just too 'in his business' and he had to take a break. Every time he had tried to have Bella over, his brothers would hoot and holler loud enough for her to hear every time they kissed or something like that. They drove him out of the house at least once or twice a week at least, and he wouldn't be able to go back without facing them again.

As he sat there, watching the light reflect off the shimmering water and the skies dimmed, embarrassment filled his thoughts.

All of his family had been pestering him about Lyra this and Lyra that; even humans had started questioning if something was going on between them. Is that what it looked like? He knew he hadn't been that social before and after Bella, but really, it wasn't that big a story. They were friends, so what. He didn't have any feelings for her…right?

Sure, Lyra was extremely smart, talented and was funny without having to make jokes all the time. And it wasn't like he was unaware of her physical attractiveness too; she was beautiful, exotically so, and thanks to all the hormone driven boys at their school, he had noticed how her flowing dresses and pretty skirts accented her shape. But that wasn't the kind of attraction he felt for her. They were friends, at least to him…

Edward fisted his hands in his hair and groaned, tugging on the strands of bronze. Human emotions were something he had discovered again only recently, with Bella, and he was not used to this. All of those feelings had been directed at her, and the ones he was experiencing right now were so different he didn't know how to handle them.

This was where the embarrassment came in; he didn't want people asking him how he felt because he wasn't sure. He wasn't sure if he liked her or not, or what was in store for them. All these people asking him questions about it was flustering him, making feel like an awkward teenage boy instead of a seasoned, century-old vampire.

Suddenly he jumped, the vibration from his phone scaring him. He pulled it out to see another text from the girl he was just warring over.

Skupa, tova ne oznachava, mozhete da go napravite! …What?

What? I don't speak Bulgarian. He replied curiously.

Oh whoops! Sorry I was supposed to send that to my cousin. I'm surprised you're still up!

Edward looked at his watch and was surprised to see that it was nearly 1 o'clock in the morning.

I guess I lost track of time, he replied when he uncurled himself from his fetal position.

I'd think that's hard to do at 1 am.

Yeah. He replied simply. As he was running, putting himself on auto-pilot, he found himself going not in the direction of home, but toward the girl he was talking to. In a matter of minutes, he was in the same tree as before, out of sight, staring at the balcony off of her room.

Lyra was walking around her room, speaking hurriedly to someone on the phone with an angry look on her face.

"Tryabva da znaete, che ne e nared! Vie ste…"

As she conversed with the person on the other line, he watched her move around. She pressed her lips together when she was mad, and fidgeted with things around her room. Finally she punched the disconnect button and fell down onto her bed as if she were exhausted. He found this interesting.

Sighing, she went over to her desk and typed something into the computer, then grabbed something from the dresser and went off somewhere into the house. He heard the shower start moments later.

Curiosity plagued his mind; he found himself wanting to go look through her window, to see what she was doing on the computer. He wanted to know what she had been saying on the phone, what she said in her text, why she was angry, why she was up so late. Questions that he couldn't ask flooded through his mind and the urge to jump onto her balcony became even greater. He wanted to know everything about her.

Then he realized it was Bella all over again: the nagging questions, confusing emotions, stalker-like tree viewing. Except this time he wanted to know because of her; not her blood or silent thoughts. He was intrigued by her and her alone.

And that was how he knew his family was right.

Contrary to what his brothers thought, he wasn't completely clueless when it came to women and attraction. He had never experienced it before Bella, but from all the human and non-human thoughts he had heard, he knew what the signs were. And now that they were all staring him in the face, he didn't know what to do. The concept of being with someone, a human, scared him just like it had with Bella. He was a super strong and speedy vampire who could easily kill practically anything on this earth.

As Lyra walked back into her room (in a towel wrapped around her torso, so he averted his eyes), another reason for caution creeped into his mind. One that made these feelings of his nearly invalid.

No matter what she said, she was a European girl that would follow what her parents wanted her to do. She would finish school then probably get married before she was twenty and have some kids. It wasn't in her lifestyle or culture to be with someone like him, an American, even if she was interested. She was dutiful and selfless, so she would please her family before herself, despite their possessive attitude toward her; like she was some kind of property to be owned.

So what was he to do?

The light in his peripheral vision was cut off, so he looked back to see her shifting underneath her quilt, getting comfortable. Concentrating, he listened carefully until her breathing evened out. Then he was on her balcony.

Now he really felt like a peeping tom. With Bella he had been curious, unaware of his feelings, when he had first gone into her room. Now he was looking, eager and excited at the thought of finding out any morsel of information on his new object of concern. Not that his feelings mattered in this case. She could never return them.

But before he could go any further, his damn phone rattled in his pocket. Cursing, he flipped it open to see a message from…Jasper?

Where are you?

Why? He replied. But after a few minutes of waiting motionlessly, there was no answer.

So he jumped off the little terrace and sped off, his breath hitching as he heard Lyra stir in her room. She was a light sleeper apparently, so he would have to be careful. God, he was sick.

As he was entering the door, Jasper appeared behind him and motioned quietly for Edward to follow. For the third time that day, he ran with someone out of hearing range from his family.

"What?" he asked curtly. He didn't want to be pulled away when he had things to do; like seeing what bookstores in the area had Bulgarian dictionaries.

"I just wanted to ask you something." Jasper stated calmly. Edward asked him 'what' again.

What's going on with you? Every time I see you, there's confliction in your eyes and uncertainty rolling off you in waves. Alice is getting frustrated with me because you've been affecting me so much. Then Edward saw that this was mostly for Jasper's benefit, not the genuine concern he had thought it was.

"It's nothing," Edward replied curtly. He didn't want to have this conversation, again, with someone who didn't even care.

Is that annoyance I'm getting?

"Yes, now get to your point."

I already did. I'm just curious why you've been such an emotional roller coaster these last few weeks. I heard Esme talking to Carlisle in the study; does it have something to do with the human girl?

"…Yes," Edward sighed, giving up. "Is that all?"

I guess. But Edward, please just listen. I know what you're feeling, as you know, so you can always talk to me if you want. I know it's annoying when everybody's always asking you questions, but you're obviously all confused and stuff, so if you want to spill the beans, go ahead.

"I'm fine Jasper."

"That's not what I'm getting from you." His blonde brother countered. "Before tonight you were all mopey and confused…but now you're determined with a little confliction," Jasper explained, like he was a brewer talking about wine flavors.

"I just…" Jasper leaned forward, curiosity getting the best of him. "Before I go on, I feel obligated to inform you that I will kill you like a dog if you ever repeat what I'm going to say." His sibling just smirked at the threat and crossed his arms patiently.

"I went to Lyra's today…and had a little emotional epiphany. I feel like an idiot, but I guess all of you guys were right: I do like her. But I feel weird about it, like I don't know how to handle this, like I don't want to. I've never felt this before." Jasper was still before he answered.

"Edward…I may be wrong, but I think that wrong feeling you have is because of Bella."

"Bella? What does she have to do with this?"

"Edward…I know you're confused, because you were in a relationship with a human, not a vampire, so the principles were different. But Lyra is different than Bella, yet every time you talk about her, you make a comparison. You have to let Bella go; she's not in this anymore. She's the past, and if you want Lyra in your future, you have to forget about her."

They both stood still as Edward absorbed this. Now that he thought about it, that feeling he felt was a different kind of awkwardness than the social kind he had experienced so far. True, the two girls were different, but Bella was the only reference he had, so how could he not make comparisons?

"Oh…I guess that makes sense…" Jasper snorted at his ignorance.

You have a lot to learn about women my friend. Just take it slow; she'd be pretty stupid to ignore you anyway, so it'll all work out. Jasper sent waves of confidence around them and Edward laughed.

As they ran back to the house, racing and trying to trip each other, Edward distractedly tried to face the difficult truth, for the second time in his eternal life.

He was falling: hard.

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In Midnight Sun, Edward felt similar to this when he realized his feelings for Bella, so I thought it would be funny if it happened again. Gosh, he's so clueless!

R&R

-cally (^o^)