A/N: 1) Spidey has been on the Avengers for six months now.
2) There's a bit of swearing and some sexual references.
Dammit, I'm gonna be late! He thought with a start as he heard the first ring of the giant bell. He webbed up the last criminal before jumping into the air and launching a line of webbing towards the nearest skyscraper. It's gonna take me at least ten minutes to get there at top speed. And with my luck, there's gonna be another mugging I have to stop. I so need a sidekick. I could call them Spider-lad or Spider-Lass! That'd confuse the hell out of people, seeing as me and Spider-woman aren't related in any respect and the tabloids still think we're husband and wife or something.
He smiled internally as he thought back to how much easier his career as Spider-man was now that he wasn't being hunted like a criminal by the police. Although I wouldn't mind it if Ms Marvel came looking for me again and...his train of thought was cut off by the sight of yet another distraction, this one a bank robbery. And as he neared, he realized one of the men was wearing a cheap Halloween Spider-man mask. Now JJ's gonna pin this one on me. "THAT VILE MISCREANT HAS REDUCED HIMSELF TO ROBBING BANKS OF YOUR HARD-EARNED MONEY!" I really should wring his neck sometime, he thought as he webbed the fleeing robbers mid-swing.
"I'm gonna sue you for copyright infringement!" Peter shouted as he turned a corner. Right after I figure out how to, without revealing my identity to the world. He smirked as he increased the pace of his swinging. Within minutes, the shining pillar of justice known to the public as Avengers Tower came into sight.
The gaping hole that had been created in the side of the building during the fight with Morlun had been repaired within less than a week. Vision required major overhaul that took a little under a month to complete. Fortunately, there had been no casualties, and the worst injury had been Hawkeye's lacerations to the neck. Those had needed three months to fully heal. Although the marksman was up and beating everybody at darts in less than a week.
With one final swing, Peter propelled himself onto one of the outer decks and slid inside. Ironically, he entered the same hall in which he had managed to pin Morlun. And I don't think I'll ever get that image out of my head, he mused before he remembered the look that he had gotten from Ms Marvel banished the happy thoughts from his mind temporarily.
During his time as an Avenger, he had gotten to know her a little better. As was the protocol, he had learned her name, Carol Danvers. And with a little digging, he had managed to squeeze a few facts about her life. A jack-of-all-trades woman, she had been a model, reporter and C.I.A at one point before being assigned to a satellite installation that later came under attack by the Kree, an alien race of warriors. An explosion of one of their bombs infused her with their D.N.A, giving her superpowers.
Kind of makes getting bit by a genetically-altered spider seem kind of lame. No aliens, no secret government programs or kidnapping plots. And I'm definitely not a god with a magic hammer. But I am late for an important...meeting. He thought as he pumped his legs and literally ran into the main lounge of the Avengers Mansion, finding it filled with six bodies.
In one corner stood a towering Luke Cage, and beside him was the lean Iron Fist. Sitting on the couch was Tony Stark, a glass of expensive wine in his hand and deep in conversation with Spider-woman, also known as Jessica Jones. Sitting on a chair opposite them was Captain America, Steve Rodgers.
Thor, the thunder god was boasting loudly about a recent battle he had in Asgard, complete with a large mug in his hand and deep in conversation with Hawkeye, who also ha d a mug in hand. Sitting slightly apart from them was Ms Marvel, holding a simple glass of water in her hand.
"You'd find more cheer in a graveyard," Peter announced as he strode into the room, earning a series of mild groans in response from everyone except Ms Marvel, who stayed quiet, and Thor, who riased his mug and bellowed.
"Thou dost speak truely! Bring forth more ale and fine women!" he bellowed as he brought his mug down on the table with a crash.
"Oi!" Spider-woman snapped as she turned her head to face the Norse figure. "Right here!"
"About time you showed up web-head!" Hawkeye remarked, "you really need to get a watch!"
"And you need to get a new designer," Peter shot back sarcastically. "Purple is not your colour. It clashes with your eyes."
"Why you little..." Hawkeye grunted as he got to his feet. Luckily, Captain America stepped in between him and Peter before things got nasty.
"We have a schedule for a reason, Spider-man," Captain America said sternly as he crossed his arms. "Two Avengers stationed in the mansion at any and all times, ready to respond to a threat. Four more on call as a reserve team. If you can't be relied upon to show up..."
"Hey, I got caught up with a few muggings and a robbery. Next time I'll ask the bad guys to forward me their timetable so I can plan my but-kicking ahead, K?" Peter said with a smug shrug and a weak smile, hoping to avoid the rest of the lecture.
He was successful, but only barely, based on Captain America's tightened and contorting jaw.
"We'll you're on night shift with Carol," Stark said as he got off the couch and began to make his way towards the door, wobbling slightly with every step. "Do me a favour and don't call me. I've got a movie premier in the morning and I'd like to be somewhat awake for that."
"Then what are those LMD's for?" Wasp smirked lightly as she followed him to the door. "Hank once tried to use one to take me on our date night."
"Tried?" Peter asked.
"It's voice sounded way to human to be Hank," Wasp said fleetingly as she slipped out the door.
"And I gotta be somewhere," Cage said as he checked his watch. "Jess'll kill me if I don't relieve the babysitter on time. Rand, you coming?"
"I have to," Iron Fist replied, "It's my car." Peter let out a small laugh at Iron Fist's comment as the two of them passed through the door. Captain America and Hawkeye followed them, and Thor brought up the rear, mumbling about something called 'bifrost.'
"Gee," Peter smirked as he flopped down on one of the couches, "I really can clear a room, can't I? Do my feet stink that much?"
"Cap was just busting your balls 'cause he can," Spider-woman chirped up. "He thinks keeping things in order means having control. He's been like that since before I joined up. And he'll be like that until the day he dies. Still wouldn't hurt to show up on time though."
"Like I said," Peter replied briskly, "I had a few muggings and robberies to stop on my way here."
"Even with the workload here?" Spider-woman asked, "man, you must be beat when the day's done. Let the cops handle the small time stuff. Stark say's we've got bigger fish to fry like Doom and AIM."
"I'm not just gonna ignore a crime because it's below the attention of the likes of Stark," Peter snapped briskly as he folded his arms across his chest. "When was the last time you broke up a mugging?" he asked, with a hint of a challenge in his voice.
"I never really got into that stuff," she answered. "I joined S.H.I.E.L.D right after busting out of HYDRA. Maybe the occasional robbery, but I've always been more focused on the bigger threats like Doom and Modok. How 'bout you, Ms M?"
"Hm?" Ms Marvel replied, coming out of her daze for the first time since Peter arrived. "What...?"
"Web-head thinks we don't put enough time into keeping the streets safe from the average Joe criminal. When was the last time you broke up a robbery or something?" Spider-woman asked.
"Dunno," Ms Marvel said with a slight shrug. "Unless you count the ones who just run as I fly overhead, it's probably been a year at least."
"My point exactly," Peter said triumphantly. "Three store robberies, six muggings, a rape, five purse thieves and a hostage situation."
"This year?" Spider-woman said, a slight stutter in her voice.
"Today."
...
Night fell and left with the first traces of early morning. Peter entertained himself during the long hours by idly flipping through channels on the Avenger's large-screen television. Of course, since he had all this time to himself, there was nothing good on any of the nine hundred channels. Boring, boring, seen it, boring, lame, do I even wanna know, boring, he thought as he passed by each channel, discovering nothing of any interest until finally...
"Hello Spider-man." The channel changed all on it's own, showing a three dimensional rendering of what looked like a butler's head. "There is an incoming transmission from Charles Xavier's Institute for Gifted Youngsters. Please stand by while I secure the tranmission." The screen filled with snow.
"Umm..." Peter muttered, looking around for some assistance, as he had no idea what was going on, "A little help..?" he asked nobody as a bald man's head appeared on the screen. Unlike the butler's head, this man was real.
"Anthony we..." The man said, but stopped himself and cleared his throat. Peter recognized the man immediately. It was Charles Xavier, a leading expert in the world of genetic mutations and founder of a supposed 'mutant school.' The only reason he knew this was because he had dated a mutant in high school. "I'm sorry," Xavier said as he collected himself, "I don't believe we have been formally introduced. My name is..."
"Charles Xavier," Peter said coolly, doing his best not to have a miniature freak-out. "Leading name in genetic mutations. I'm Thor, by the way."
"My boy, one of my students here used to have her room covered with your posters. I know for a fact that you are Spider-man, not Thor, who I have had the pleasure of meeting." Xavier said with a smile. "But enough of this. The Brotherhood member named Mesmero has taken over the mind of one of my X-men and sent her on a path towards New York. I cannot scramble a team in time and need assistance, as she could prove to be a..."
"Name," Ms Marvel's powerful voice said as she glided into the room.
"Miss Danvers," Xavier said warmly, "what a pleasant.."
"Is it her?" Ms Marvel stated questioningly.
"I.." Xavier began.
"Is it her?" she repeated angrily, "is it Rogue!?"
"Yes." Xavier replied in a defeated tone.
"I'm on my way to intercept," Ms Marvel grunted before turning and shooting out the room so fast that Peter barely had time to register what direction she was headed in. He did his best to follow her, only taking the time to warn Spider-woman about what was going on before sprinting towards the main exit.
As soon as he was outside, he realized his mistake. There was no way he would be able to actually catch up with Ms Marvel, even if she went at a slower pace. But he still had to try. He swung at full speed in the direction he thought she had gone. forty minutes later, he was about to give up and turn back when two bodies crashed into a parking garage.
He launched himself towards the hole in the side of the building as he heard a woman's savage roar of pain.
"GGGGAAAAHHHHH!"
"You took away my life!"
"Unnnggg!"
"My memories!"
"I'm sorr..."
"My identity!" He heard Ms Marvel shout as a woman's body was thrown towards him. He ducked under it and rushed to the woman's side, ready to check for injuries. The first thing he noticed was the woman's dark brown hair with a single streak of white. The second was the gloves. He was forced to abandon his examination as the woman got to her feet and shot over his shoulder.
"Ms marvel, can't hold on to anything in her life can...get outta ma head Mesmer...the drunken...OUT!...super-slut...It's ma life!...wears that outfit to get some attention..."
"Shut up!" Ms Marvel shouted as she charged forward and her fist connected with the woman's jaw hard. Peter winced at the supersonic impact sound, understanding that if he had been hit that hard, he would be dead, and that told him he was in a very dangerous situation as the woman punched Ms Marvel back, creating the same sound.
Peter's eyes shot past the duelling femme fatale's and to the horrified-looking family of four huddled in a corner. His eyes widened as Ms Marvel sent an energy-charged fist strait towards the woman, who dodged, and the blow impacted the wall behind her.
"Stop!" Peter shouted as Ms marvel thrust another punch forward. Again the blow was dodged and it impacted the wall, causing small pieces of rubble to fall to the ground around them as he rushed over to the crouched family. "K folks," he said in a hurried voice, "nothing to see here, just your everyday...whoa!" He pushed all four bodies out of the way as Ms Marvel was thrown into the wall where they had been standing.
"Get outta ma head creep!" the woman shouted as she hovered in midair. "How's Mar-vel? Still dead?" Peter watched as Ms Marvel got to her feet and charged her opponent once more, causing a seismic shock-wave to blast outwards and send more chunks of rubble to the ground.
"Move!" Peter shouted as a large piece of concrete fell to the floor. "Go! Go!" He shouted as the family bolted for the nearest exit. Meanwhile, He attempted to break the two of them apart, only to receive an elbow to the face in return. He sprawled on the ground and spat out three teeth before getting to his feet once more. He reared his fist, ready to attack, but pain lanced up his arm, informing him that it was broken at the very least. Crap, he thought as he assessed the situation. There was no way he could match either of them in a fair fight, so he searched for an alternative way of beating them.
Deciding to use his brains this time, he shot several lines of webbing towards both women, hoping to pin them apart. Unfortunately, they where both so strong that either they ripped chunks of wall loose or pieces of fabric from their clothing. As he had tried to restrain their hands, both women lost their gloves as they continued to brawl.
The woman launched a particularly powerful blow to Ms Marvel's face, which sent her to the ground. In less than a second, the woman was on top of her once more, pounding away. Peter could see a change in the fight. Ms Marvel was moving slower with each landed blow, while the woman was moving faster and seemed to be hitting harder. Knowing he had to do something, he mustered all his strength and struck the woman in her temple with a single blow that did little more than appear to phase her on the surface.
But Peter also noticed a change in her expression. One second she looked angry, and the next she looked scared.
"Ah...no.." was all she said before shooting out the side of the building. Not giving the fleeing woman a second thought as he re-adjusted his injured arm and stumbled over to where Ms Marvel lay.
"Where's the bitch..." Ms Marvel muttered as her eyes fluttered open and she attempted to get to her feet.
"Easy," he said as he placed a hand on her shoulder, stopping her. Surprisingly, she offered up relatively little resistance, confirming two of his theories. The fight had somehow drained her of her strength. "As much as I'd like to see you tear up your costume more in a babe-on-babe fight, Avengers vs X-men sounds like a corny comic book title."
"Not in the...mood," Ms Marvel said as she started to sway on her feet. The only thing keeping her upright was Peter's arm. "I've gotta..."
"Get some rest," he said sternly. "Then you can finish demolishing the city. Can you fly?"
"I..." she muttered as she straitened herself. With a simple pump of her legs she hopped upwards and remained in the air for a second before crashing down. "That...that bitch..she..."
"'K," he said as he wrapped his injured arm under her shoulders. "We're gonna try this. I dunno how far I'll be able to go with my bum arm and all but..."
"How far out are we from headquarters...?" she asked, still in a slight daze.
"About forty minutes by swinging. And that's just me with two good arms," He replied as he guided her to the edge of the building and prepared to swing.
"Shit..." she said, "are you gonna...?"
"I'll never make it there," he said, "It'd take me at least an hour. And that's assuming I don't pass out from the pain." He finished with a grunt as he prepared to swing, "my apartment's not far from here. We'll stop there and I'll call HQ and get someone to pick us up. Hope you don't get motion sickness." He finished as he jumped into the air and began to swing. Almost immediately intense pain shot through his body with each flex of every muscle. Out of the corner of his eye he watched as Ms Marvel passed into unconsciousness as the sun's first rays struck her golden hair.
He winced every time he shot out a new web-line, and the added weight of the woman he was carrying didn't help at all. And to top it all off, he heard a woman's scream coming from below. Cursing inside, he changed course, heading for the source of the scream.
He came to a halt on a rooftop and set Ms Marvel down, whispering, "I'll be back in a sec," to her sleeping form before crawling to the edge of the roof. Below him was an alley with three people in it, two men and a young woman. One of the men held a knife while the other held a crowbar.
"Just give us the fuckin' bag lady," the crowbar wielding man demanded.
"An' we ain't gonna hurt cha," the knife wielder finished with a grin.
"Right," Peter shouted as he jumped down from the roof and landed between the men and the woman. "So you won't mind if she takes everything of value out first and stuff's it in her pockets?" He said with a weak smirk. Despite his injuries, he was fairly certain he could handle two petty purse-snatchers.
"I'm gonna bust you up, bug," the man with the crowbar said as he tapped his open palm with the iron bar.
"Ohh," Peter said mockingly, causing pain to shoot up his ribs, "I'm scared. Looks like Ock and Gobbie have got some stiff competition. Gliders and tentacles have got nothing on a punk with a run-of-the-mill hardware store crowbar..." he laughed as blood trickled out of the side of his mouth.
"Looks like someone beat cha too it Frank," the knife man said with a smile. "What's the matter, bug? Run into a windshield wiper or sumthin' like that?"
"Something," he said with a grin as the two men stepped forward. Before they could do anything else, they where both struck by a blast of yellow energy from behind and above.
"You idiot..." Ms Marvel grunted as she slumped down on the roof and the intended victim ran past him. He crawled up the wall as Ms marvel continued. "couldn't leave it to the cops, could you?" she finished as she passed into unconsciousness once more.
"Wouldn't be very heroic-like of me," he said to no one as he shot into the air again. It took him another five minutes to reach his apartment. He crouched low and pulled up the roof access hatch that led to his apartment. He had discovered it long before he moved in, and had requested that specific one when he rented it.
The apartment was small, only four rooms. One bedroom with a double bed in it, a bathroom, kitchen and living room that where all connected by a single hallway. He set the still out-cold Ms Marvel down on the bed and did a quick change of his own clothing in the bathroom. Even though he was not a virgin, he didn't think Ms marvel would like the idea of waking up to the sight of his manhood hanging out in front of her face. Might just get me killed, he mused as he heard a slight rustle from behind him.
"..the hell am I..?" Ms Marvel asked groggily, "did we make it back to.."
"No," he smiled, "you're in my apartment. There was no way I'd have made it back while carrying you. See if anything of mine'll fit you. I don't think you want to go flying around with that much skin exposed," he said, indicating to the large tear across her back. "And I'll call HQ and arrange a ride." He finished as he slipped out of the room and into the kitchen, where the landline was located. He quickly dialled the secret Avengers number he had been given.
"Hello?" the voice of Spider-woman answered, "who is..."
"Your male counterpart," he replied wittily.
"Spidey!" she half-shouted. "What happened? Where's Carol? I thought you'd be back or something by now!"
"We're both here, at my apartment," he replied, "there was a little throw-down and Ms M's not able to fly for some reason. And I think I busted my arm, so I couldn't make it all the way back. Can we get a Quinjet to come pick us up?"
"No-go," Spider-woman said, "Doom made a move for Wakanda half an hour ago. I scrambled Cage, Fist and DD for that. And the other one's still busted from the crash last month. I'll see if the F4 can..." Peter quickly put the phone on the hook as he heard the click of a key being slid into the lock of his door.
...
My head... Carol thought as she opened her eyes. She found herself surrounded by unfamiliar walls as she sat up. To her relief, she was still wearing her clothes. She was sitting on a bed in a small apartment, and there was a light on in the bathroom across the hall. The last thing she remembered was blasting two thugs in the middle of the street who where in the midst of a standoff with Spider-man. She tried to stand and succeeded, but only barely. She wobbled on the spot for a few seconds.
"...the hell am I...?" she pondered out loud, "did we make it back to..."
"No," a man said as he stepped out of the bathroom, dressed in a white t-shirt and worn jeans. "My apartment. There was no way I'd have made it back while carrying you. See if anything of mine'll fit you. I don't think you want to go flying around with that much skin exposed," Carol blinked in astonishment. Why was this strange man helping her? It took her a few minutes to even properly place his voice. Spider-man.. she thought as she stumbled to the dresser and pulled open one of the drawers.
No...not Spider-man...she thought as she struggled to remember his civilian identity. Despite the Avenger's rule of revealing one's identity to the entire team in order to avoid imposters, people still referred to each other by codename most often. Peter, I think it was...Peter Perman? no...Perchant? She continued as she pulled out a pair of grey sweatpants from his drawer.
One of the downsides to her half Kree DNA was that she was taller and broader than most normal women, and even most men, standing as 6'8. That made finding clothes a huge problem for her. She slipped off her tattered uniform and into the sweatpants, finding them a perfect fit. Another minute of searching and she found an old, very large t-shirt that she managed to cover her DD+ sized breasts with relative comfort, which was another rare occurrence for her. She smiled at this stroke of luck as she looked about the room, finding a series of plaques and pictures.
One plaque read: 'Midtown High-school highest grade average award 2003' and underneath the bold writing was the name 'Peter Parker.' She moved on to the next as she heard the dialling of a phone in the kitchen. She found herself looking at a picture of a ten year-old boy sitting in a boat with an older man in his forties. Though the photo was faded, she could see that thee boy had sandy brown hair and was wearing an 'iron man' shirt, and that he was very happy. She shifted her attention to the man, who was dressed in a fisher's hat and jacket. He wore worn out khaki pants, and underneath his jacket Carol could make out a familiar design on the shirt, she just couldn't place it in her memory.
"Aunt May!" she jumped slightly as she heard Peter call out, "what...what are you doing here? You...I mean...um..."
"That's the thing about family dear," a older woman's voice replied, "they sometimes like to show up unannounced! I called you last night, but you didn't answer, so I thought I'd drop in for a little visit!"
"I...umm..." she heard Peter stutter through the open door.
"Absolutely speechless, aren't you Peter?" the woman said merrily from the hall, "I'll just set my bags down in your room and we'll go out for some breakfast, okay?"
"No, wait Aunt May! I..." Peter stammered as shadows appeared in the hall. Carol thought about making a break for the window, but she was unsure if she could open it in time without making a sound. And she wasn't sure if there was something for her to stand on, seeing as her flight capabilities weren't working right.
"Relax Peter," the woman said as her shadow got even closer, "there's nothing in your room that would surprise me, you did live in my house for eleven years, remember?" Her shadow disappeared as her actual form appeared in the doorway, facing away from it. "It'll take a lot for you to surprise this old...oh!" The woman stopped as soon as she turned into the room, staring at Carol, who did her best to smile weakly at the humour of the situation. The woman appeared to be in her late seventies or early eighties with short, grey hair and wrinkled skin. She wore a long brown synthetic fur coat and carried a black purse in one hand.
"Um...Hello?" Carol offered as she tentatively reached out a hand, which the woman shook gently as Peter entered the room, looking extremely flustered. She couldn't blame him. Although her superhero identity was technically not a secret, she still preferred not to tell people. She guessed that Peter was in a similar position. Why aren't I thinking of him as Spider-man? She thought briefly.
"Aunt May this is..." He began to say, but choked on his words.
"My name's Carol," Carol said with a weak smile, "Carol Danvers. I'm a friend of Peter's from..."
"The Bugle," Peter cut in, "Carol's one of the new columnist's Jameson hired a few months ago and um..."
"Oh," Peter's Aunt said with a warm smile. "Peter, I believe I left the door open and unlocked, could you check it please?"
"Um.. sure," Peter said as he slipped out of the room. The woman's expression changed from a warm one to a frightening one as her grip on Carol's hand tightened. Nothing compared to what she could do, but the gesture was clear with intention.
"Listen good," his Aunt said with a threatening whisper. "My nephew has been hurt to many times to count, sometimes by those he trusts. If I find out you've hurt him, or are using him in any way, you're a dead woman walking. Understand?"
