Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, nor any of the characters and I will not make any money out of this!
A/N: First HP Fanfic, hope you enjoy ^^. M for content later on, Slash DM/HP. Contains references to Self-Harm/Eating Disorders *could be triggering* Please keep yourself safe while reading, or skip if something is too much :)
This is Harry's POV :)
I had paced around this room so many times in the past few days that I was surprised I hadn't worn a hole in the floorboards... That dream had been so, so- real! It had felt real anyway, and it had made me happy... The conversation I had had with Hermione the night before kept jutting in my mind. I could hear her words; "You should tell him... It might do him some good."
My stomach growled loudly, reminding me that I hadn't eaten dinner the night before, and interrupting my train of thought; I hadn't eaten for over twelve hours and I was really hungry... I decided that I should probably go down and get myself something to eat.
Ron was sat at the table in the kitchen, I was slightly surprised to see him up and (supposedly) working so early in the morning, but he had a sandwich in front of him, which I half expected.
"Morning," He said, he sounded unexpectedly cheery and something about that made me stand frozen to the spot, unnerved. "Want a sandwich?"
"Yeah, alright." I agreed and he stood up to make one. I got the impression that there was something he wanted to talk to me about, but it might take some time to wheedle it out of him. I flicked my wand at the kettle to begin making tea for both of us and turned over two mugs. We remained in silence until Ron had finished making the sandwich and I had two cups of tea, and I sat myself down across the table from him. I took a bite of my sandwich, waiting for him to speak. After quite a considerable pause he spoke:
"Hermione said something odd last night..." He was trying very hard to sound light and conversational, but I knew we had come to what he really wanted to talk about.
"Really? What was that then?" I replied, taking another bite of sandwich but my heart was hammering so hard in my throat that I couldn't swallow.
"She said that you like someone." He was definitely sounding interested now; I swallowed my bite with some difficulty and gave a non-committal shrug. "So you do! Who is it? Do we know them?" I took a sip of tea to delay having to answer this; I wanted to do it in the best way possible.
"You know them... but you don't really like them." I said, trying to be as tactful as I could, Ron's brow knit together as he thought as he thought about this.
"It's not Lavender, is it?" He asked suddenly with his eyes wide, I had just taken another drink and spluttered into my cup.
"No, no it's not Lavender." I had to suppress the urge to laugh; Ron had never quite gotten over his fear of Lavender since they split up in sixth year.
"Good." He answered, stuffing half of his sandwich in his mouth. He didn't seem to have anything else to say, that was all he wanted to know.
I spent the morning pacing about the house, thinking about things that I probably should be doing. I should really be re-writing my submission letter, for the auror training course that I had been planning to apply for, now that Hermione had looked over it. The only problem was that I couldn't be bothered, I felt apathetic about the whole situation. Even if I did get into it (as I didn't have any N.E.W.T results) I wasn't sure if I wanted to go back into a life of constant and disciplined study and work. I didn't really have many other options, I hadn't considered a career as anything else in all my time throughout the school, and even if I did think of something else to do if I didn't have any exam results so I had very little chance of getting any other kind of job, not even one within the muggle world.
I spent almost an hour considering what I should do about the submission letter, thinking whether I should get it and re-write it. It came as a start when I realised I hadn't thought about Malfoy for a whole hour. I then scowled, why did I keep coming back to Malfoy? There was absolutely no connection between the Auror training course and Malfoy... But, somehow in my mind, there was a link – both Malfoy and the auror training course seemed to somehow, inexplicably, be joined together by one thing. My future...
A/N: Ooooooohhhhhhh- have I left you wanting the next chapter now? :D If I have, please, please, please review! (I'm on my knees begging)
Depending on the reaction and reviews I will post more up later tonight/early tomorrow… or later... Lovage xx
