Chapter 9: Feelings
I quickly run back to my locker and grab my textbooks. Arriving at class, I see some girls gossiping in the corner of the room. As I walk in, they cock their heads and give me a weird look, then quickly turn back and resume their conversation. I can only assume they're talking about Sayori and I. Yeah, I couldn't care less.
I take my seat and begin to write my poem. It's short and not as good as my last one, but it'll do.
As I finish up, the teacher walks into the class. He instructs us to pull out our textbooks. Putting my poem in my bag, I do as I'm told.
A couple hours later...
The bell rings and the teacher dismisses class. Without hesitation, I grab my stuff and head for the clubroom. Opening the door, I find I'm the first one here. Fine by me. Walking over to my usual desk, I slump down and pull out my earbuds, again. Today, I put on "There's No Secrets This Year" by Silversun Pickups, the opener for their album Swoon. I intend to just let whole album play itself. I pull out Dante's Inferno and start reading.
Monika is the first to arrive. I give her a wave and she walks over to me. Her eyebrows are furrowed out of anger. I take out my left earbud.
"What exactly are you doing?" Monika asks. I can hear the rage in her voice.
"Reading?" I say.
"Don't play dumb, you know what I'm talking about." Monika snaps.
I let out a long sigh. "You'll know in due time." I reply coldly.
Monika grimaces and clenches her fist.
"You're horrible." Monika says through her teeth.
"You say that now." I retort.
"What's that supposed to mean?" Monika questions.
I open my mouth to answer, but Natsuki walks in before I can speak. She raises an eyebrow when she sees Monika standing over me.
"Oh, hi Natsuki! We were just finishing up our conversation." Monika steps away from the desk and adjusts her hair.
"... Alright" Natsuki says awkwardly.
Monika walks to the front of the room and begins to work on her poster. The rest of the girls continue to funnel in and do their own things. Sayori helps Monika with the poster while Yuri and Natsuki read their books. As I continue to read, I occasionally look up and see the girls glancing at me. I notice Natsuki looks a bit uneasy, like she has something on her mind. She glances at me expectantly, but doesn't make a move.
The music continues to play in order, from the melancholic vocals in "Growing Old Is Getting Old" to the upbeat drumming and electronic riff in "Sort Of". I like "Sort Of", the lyrics are similar to mine in a way.
Do you think, I'm sort of, alive?
I hum to myself as Sayori walks over to me. I see her approach and take out one of my earbuds expectantly.
"Hey Sayori."
"Hi Nathan!~" Sayori beams.
"So, Monika asked me to go and get some supplies to make posters, and I was wondering if you wanted to come with!"
"Eh, sure. Why not?"
"Yay!" Sayori does a little jump. This girl is too cute…
"Ah, are you going with Nathan to get the supplies?" Monika interrupts my thoughts. "There's no need to trouble yourself."
"I'd be happy to go with him." Monika smiles at me.
I'm torn between continuing my conversation with Monika and spending time with Sayori. Wait a minute, shouldn't they be watching?
While Sayori and Monika continue to argue, I secretly double tap my right temple.
"Nathan, go with Sayori. Monika knows too much." Lewis says, clearly annoyed.
I nod my head and end the connection. Monika and Sayori seemingly came to a conclusion. Sayori heads for the door and motions for me to follow. I trail behind her as we walk through the halls. Sayori skips from side to side, humming to herself.
I play dumb. "So Sayori, what exactly are we doing for the festival?"
Sayori slows down as gets by my side.
"Oh, you didn't here? We're doing a poetry performance!"
"Really? That sounds like fun."
"I know! We're making posters to advertise it so people can bring their own poems and perform them!" Sayori exclaims.
"That's a really good idea."
"I came up with it." Sayori stops and puts her hands on her hips and stands proud.
"Well, as expected from the cutest member of the literature club." I flirt with a smirk on my face.
Sayori blushes and looks away. I can hear her stammering to come up with a retort, but she doesn't say anything. Suddenly, she stops and points to a classroom door.
"This one!" She says, opening the door.
We walk inside and immediately head for the closet. Sayori is the first one inside, while I wait near the closet door.
"Lets see what we have in here….Crayons!" Sayori exclaims.
"Good find. Alright, now let me get the poster paper." I say, moving into the closet.
"Wait, I'm looking for my favorite color!" Sayori whines.
"Ah, I dropped one by accide-KYAA!"
Sayori smacks her forehead against the shelf. She falls to the ground.
"Owowowow-My forehead!" Sayori clutches her head.
Sayori's sitting on the floor, so I grab her by the waist and drag her out of the closet.
"Here, let me look at it." I sigh. "You have to move your hands, Sayori."
"But it hurts…" Sayori whines.
"Just for a little bit, okay?"
Sayori slowly moves her hands. I see a huge red bump in the middle of her forehead.
"That's gonna swell up. I should get you some ice or something."
"No, that's not necessary! I'm fine with…"
"...Looking like a unicorn" Sayori lets out a smile.
"Oh, don't be ridiculous. I'll be right back."
I get up from the floor and head outside the classroom. I take a look around the hallways to make sure I'm alone. Once it's secure, I look at the linoleum tiled ground. I imagine a cold bottle of apple juice, sitting righting in front of me.
"Execute"
A bright lights appears in front of me, manifesting itself into the apple juice. Once it's done, I pick up the bottle and head towards the classroom. Sayori is still sitting on the floor, attempting to pick up the spilled crayons.
"At least they were already in the wrong spots when I found them." Sayori says to herself.
"Here, for your head." I say, handing the bottle to Sayori.
"Ooo, apple juice!~" Sayori exclaims. She begins to pop the cap off, but stops herself and places it on her head.
"Ehehe~"
We sit in silence for a bit.
"Hey Nathan, this kind of reminds you of growing up, doesn't it?"
"Yeah, in a way." I chuckle.
"It's like when we were kids. You and I would always go off and play outside. I tried to keep up with you, but I usually fell behind and had trouble climbing on the things you did."
"And sometimes, I would end up getting myself hurt. I would start crying…"
"And you always would immediately come over and try to get me to stop crying. You've always taken care of me. Even now, when I was just being stupid, you took care of me."
Sayori has a slight glimmer in her eye.
"You're really a sweetheart, Nathan~"
I blush and Sayori giggles.
"Thanks Sayori. It means a lot coming from you." I lean down next to Sayori.
I take a deep breath.
"Sayori, you and I have known each other for a long time. We know each other better than anyone else in the world. You're my closest friend."
Sayori looks at me blissfully.
"Yet, even though I know you better than anyone, I didn't realize you had depression. I'm sorry for that."
"Nathan…"
"But, now I know. And now I'm going to help you through it. I am going to stay by your side forever Sayori, because...I…."
"I love you."
Sayori gasps and looks at me with a tear in her eye.
"Nathan...I-I" Sayori stammers and barely manages to contain her emotions. Finally, she gives in.
"I love you too!~" Sayori says as she breaks down and begins to cry. I wrap my arms around her.
We sit there, Sayori crying into my shoulder, for about a minute before she speaks through her sobs.
"T-this is the h-happiest moment of m-my life!~"
I hold Sayori tighter and whisper into her ear.
"Mine too."
After a little bit, Sayori calms down and we end our embrace. I reach my hand out and help Sayori stand up.
"Is your head going to be okay?" I ask concerningly.
"Yeah, I think I'll be fine."
Sayori and I begin to walk towards the door. Suddenly, she stops and looks at me.
"Thank you for being there for me, Nathan. You said you were going to be by my side forever. Do you mean that?"
"Of course, Sayori. Anything for you.~"
"That makes me really happy. Thank you…"
"...my love."
The sun shines through the windows and illuminates our faces as we share our first kiss in the doorway.
