Chapter 9

Carol scooped out some scrambled eggs and bacon onto two plates. She could hear Ed shuffling about the bedroom, and she knew it was only a matter of time before he smelled the food and came staggering into the kitchen still smelling like Axel's barroom.

She decided not to wait on him, so she sat down at the table and began to eat. As soon as that first bite hit her stomach, she realized how hungry she really was and had her plate nearly finished before Ed came walking in.

She eyed him as he scratched himself and walked over to the coffee pot. When he turned to her, pouring some of the hot liquid into a mug, she could see that the bandage had a red spot in the center, but it hadn't completely soaked through.

"You might stop by Dr. Rhee's office and have him take a look," Carol offered.

"Thought you said it was alright?"

"It's fine, but he might want to give you a tetanus shot or something. Who knows what kind of germs got in that wound while you were crawling around that bar floor."

"I'm fine," Ed said with a shrug, sitting down across from her. "Where were you yesterday?"

"Me? I was out with a…friend." She eyed him evenly, trying not to show him that her stomach was coiling up with anxiety at that moment. "While you were out drinking with your buddies, I was with a friend."

"This friend," he said slowly, "I met her?" Carol put her fork down and took a sip of her own coffee.

"You don't know all of my friends," Carol said quietly. "You haven't bothered to pay attention to those kinds of things for a long time." Ed sighed and put his coffee cup down.

"I'm tryin', honey."

"Ed," Carol said quickly, her heart starting to pound in her chest, "I don't think it's worth trying."

"What're you talkin' about?"

"I knew about Tiffani," she pointed out. "Before you even told me." Ed's face froze. "I was surprised the night I came home and you told me everything. Ed, I found out by accident, and I was so angry. I thought you were just trying to throw our marriage away, so I went…I went out looking for revenge." She saw Ed's face pale further, and he nearly choked on his food. He spat into his napkin and put it on the table.

"What're you sayin'?"

"I'm saying that I met someone," she said quietly.

"You tellin' me some other man's had his hands on you?" The anger was rising in Ed's voice, and Carol put a hand up.

"Don't, Ed," she warned. "You don't have the right to be angry here. You're the one that said he was so grief-stricken by his daughter's death that he went and slept with his secretary." She saw the color rising in his cheeks now. "I met someone, and yes, I slept with him. I wanted it to be revenge. I wanted to get back at you." She chose her next words carefully, wanting him to know the truth, but not wanting it to sting too badly, because, after all, neither one of them was entirely innocent here. "The second he touched me, I knew it wasn't revenge. I knew I was moving on from you. From us."

"Carol," he choked out, "you ain't serious. You're my wife."

"Ed," Carol sighed, "I haven't been your wife for a long time, and I think we both know that."

"I don't understand." His voice was low, but the redness in his face showed his confusion and anger.

"I guess I don't expect you to," Carol replied. "We've had problems for a long time, and you know that. If we weren't having problems, you wouldn't have felt the need to go to Tiffani. I was angry when I found out you cheated, and I thought I was angry because I loved you so much." She saw hope flicker in his eyes for a moment before she lowered the boom. "I think I was angry, because I knew it was over, and I felt like maybe I should have been the one to end it first. We haven't been together for a very long time, and you going to Tiffani just proved to me that I don't know you anymore."

"Carol, I still love you."

"I don't think you love me the way you used to." Carol felt a lump rising in her throat. "Ed, it's ok. It's ok that we're different. It's ok that we aren't in that place anymore."

"I don't understand," he grumbled.

"I don't love you like that, Ed. Not anymore. I haven't for a very long time." Her lower lip trembled. "When we lost Sophia, I felt like I was alone. Even when you were here. And over the past couple of years, I've become someone else. I've realized that I'm not the woman I was when we met; when we got married. And that's ok. I like this woman better." Ed's mouth fell open and closed again, and she thought he looked like he might explode at any moment. "This isn't the life I want. I can't pretend things can ever be what they were. I just want to move on. Maybe you should, too."

"You're leavin' me?"

"I have to, Ed. If you still loved me like you loved me when we got married, we wouldn't be sitting here having this conversation, because you never would have slept with your secretary, and we would have found a way to grieve Sophia together. It's just…we aren't who we used to be, and I don't want to pretend that things are going to get better when they're not."

"So you're just gonna throw away all these years?" he asked, standing up now, looming over her. She tensed up but scooted her chair back and stood to face him.

"Daryl, I didn't throw anything away. I don't hate you. I'm not angry with you. I just need to move on." With that, she turned and walked toward the door. She paused and turned back to him. "The house is in your name. I'll stay with Michonne or at a hotel."

"Or with your new boyfriend?" Ed scoffed.

"That's my business, Ed. I'll come back for my things later. You'll see, this is the best thing for both of us. It's over, Ed. It's done." Carol headed upstairs to the bedroom to gather a few things in an overnight bag. As she was about to go back down the stairs, she stepped into Sophia's old bedroom for the first time in years. She sighed and leaned against the door frame, flicking the light on. The baby pink carpet still looked immaculate, save for the old stain where Sophia had spilled her juice once. The butterfly wall decorations were starting to peel off the walls.

Carol sighed softly and knelt down next to Sophia's bed, taking the small pillow into her hands. She held it to her chest and buried her face in it. She could almost still smell the bubblegum shampoo that she used to use on Sophia. She felt tears sting her eyes again, and she put the pillow back down. She spotted the little stuffed bunny rabbit on the foot of the bed and picked it up. It had been Sophia's favorite, one she always cuddled with at night. Carol had gone out and bought it the day she'd found out she was pregnant. Sophia and that bunny had pretty much been inseparable since Sophia's birth.

Without hesitating, Carol tucked the bunny into her overnight bag and left the room, shutting off the light and closing the door behind her. She was met by Ed by the front door, who looked a mix between shaken and angry, his eyes never leaving hers as she moved toward the door.

When her hand wrapped around the door knob, his hand shot out, his fingers curling around her forearm as he stepped between her and the door. She jerked her arm out of his hands, and he jumped like he was shot.

"Carol, I'm sorry, I wasn't…"

"Don't ever put your hands on me again." In all the years they'd been married, he'd never once touched her like that, and the suddenness of it had taken her off guard, frightened her a little. Still, she wouldn't let him stop her.

"I'm sorry. I'm just…I'm sorry, Carol." Carol said nothing. She just stared at him, and finally, he backed down and got out of her way.

"I'll be back for my things," she assured him, opening the door and stepping outside, the fresh morning breeze and a warm sun greeting her, welcoming her out of her past. "Goodbye, Ed." And then she walked to her car without looking back, got in and left, her heart pounding in her chest as she felt the grip of the past few years slowly releasing her from its grasp.

"You did it? Wait, you really did it?" Michonne asked, disbelief thick in her voice.

"Yeah, I really did it," Carol murmured, still in a bit of shock herself as she sprawled out on the hotel mattress.

"Holy shit," Michonne murmured, still a bit in awe. "How'd he take it?"

"Not well, but it could have been worse."

"So, how do you feel?"

"Good," Carol murmured. "I feel good. Better. Ed'll get over it. He doesn't love me. He just thinks he does. I dunno, I kind of get the feeling he thinks I'm supposed to stay with him forever."

"Screw that," Michonne scoffed. "He can't expect you to lie to yourself."

"Like I said, Ed will get over it. He'll be alright." She didn't sound very convinced herself, but she sighed and stretched out on the bed, staring up at the ceiling.

"So, how long did it take before you called Daryl and told him to come get you."

"What?" Carol asked. "I didn't. I haven't talked to him yet."

"What? Carol…what's wrong with you?"

"What?"

"You realize that walking out that door and driving away from that house was your cue to run into the arms of the sex on legs you keep raving about, right?"

"Michonne," Carol laughed. "Stop."

"So when do I get to meet him?"

"What?"

"You have to introduce him sometime, right?" Carol groaned and ran her fingers through her short hair, feeling a little flushed at the idea of introducing her friends to her…her what? Lover? Boyfriend? Sex friend? She didn't exactly know what to call him, but whatever he was to her, it was a good thing, and she felt warm just thinking about him. Carol heard the phone beep faintly in her ear.

"Gotta go, Mich."

"What? No!" Carol hung up and checked her missed calls. She smiled and bit her lip when she saw Daryl's name pop up on her missed call screen. She quickly touched the call back button, and within a moment, his voice was in her ear.

"Hey," he murmured. "Whatcha doin'?"

"Me?" she asked innocently, "oh, I'm just lying naked on a hotel bed."

"Jesus. Fuck, really?" She giggled at the curiosity in his voice.

"Well, not really. I'm lying on a hotel bed, just not naked. I can get that way in three seconds though."

"Fuck, what hotel?"

"What?" she laughed.

"I wanna see you."

"Daryl," she laughed, "what? Aren't you working?"

"C'mon, it's my lunch break. I gotta take an extra hour anyway." Carol licked her lips.

"I'm at the Royal on Hillard street. Room 332." The line went dead, and Carol felt the heat rush through her body at the thought of him rushing to see her. She lay back on the bed, thankful that Glenn had decided to go out of town for a couple of days so the office was closed. The last thing she wanted to do at the moment was go to work and sit around listening to a bunch of people whining about their coughs or their sniffles. She had enough problems going on that she really didn't feel like dealing with a bunch of strangers' maladies.

She rolled over and pulled herself off the bed, moving to the bathroom. She stripped down to nothing and turned the shower on. As she showered, her hands moved over her body, ghosting over the places she yearned for him to touch. She bit her lip and forced herself to control her urges, moaning softly when she imagined his lips all over her breasts and her stomach.

Before she knew it, the water began to run cold, so she quickly shut it off and wrapped a towel around herself. She slipped out of the bathroom and checked her phone. No messages. She paced anxiously, wishing he'd hurry, wishing he was there already. She tossed the towel aside and was about to reach for her clothes when she froze, biting her lip and grinning mischievously. Instead, she grabbed a bathrobe off the back of the bathroom door, and she pulled the belt, hiding herself beneath the soft material.

It wasn't long before she heard a knock at the door, and her heart fluttered in her chest. She moved across the room to the door, peering out the peephole, biting her lip to stifle a giggle at the sight of Daryl leaning against the door frame, face red, hair in his eyes, breathing hard. He must have really gotten there in a hurry. Had he ran there?

"Who is it?" she asked innocently, her hand playing with the door knob.

"Carol," he groaned.

"Sorry, Mister, I don't know any Carols."

"Shit, please, Carol? Open the door." She quickly unlocked the door and threw it open, and he stood there, chest heaving, staring at her in the fluffy white bath robe as beads of water dripped from her hair and down her cleavage, disappearing into the fabric.

"Did you run?" she asked.

"Naw, but I pretty much ran through every yellow light. Almost got pulled over."

"Daryl!" she laughed, as he stepped in and shut the door, grabbing her waist and pulling her close, his lips crashing down on hers. She moaned against his mouth, her laughter giving way to passion, and he turned her around, backing her up against the door, pressing into her, needing to feel her as much as she needed him.

"God, I missed this. Missed you," he murmured as he moved to kiss her neck. She gasped as his hand cupped her breast through the fabric of the bathrobe, and she arched her back, pushing herself into his hand. She was wrapped around him now, walking him backward toward the bed. When his knees hit the mattress, they both went down, her landing on top of him, her mouth attacking his with feverish kisses. She groaned when his hand slipped inside her robe, sliding over her stomach, the action loosening the belt enough for it to untie and the garment to fall open, revealing her naked form to him in all of her glory.

Gripping her hips, he flipped her over onto her back, crawling over her, pressing kisses over her shoulder, neck and jaw. She moaned softly, pulling her arms around his neck, pulling him closer, needing more of him. She knew, in that moment, she'd never get enough.