Nothing.

No signs.

No omens.

No prophecies.

Nothing.

Is this the darkness we've been waiting for?


I make good progress, sleeping peacefully in the hollow of a tree just outside of RiverClan territory. The full moon lights my way, waking me up before dawn to continue my journey.

Ever since I left RiverClan, I've been feeling lighter on my paws. I've been feeling more alive. I can only hope and trust in myself and StarClan that I will know the way.

I know I have somewhere out there that I am meant to be. And I will find it, even if I have to sacrifice everything to get there.

No. I wouldn't sacrifice my sister. Not for anything.

I think, after a moon, I realised that the worst thing about my exile was not that Shadewhisper had betrayed me. It was that I could never go back.

I might never see her again - not even in death. But StarClan are still with me, I'm sure.

I hope.

The sun begins to rise as I reach the clearing that was once our temporary camp. We would lie in the sun over by the ferns and share prey on the shade of the holly bush. I remember the tunnel under the brambles that we discovered when Flame got stuck, her red fur tangled in the thorns.

But I also remember the kittypet, striding towards where we stood. And then the small white tom - the reason I'm here now.

He can't have appeared out of nothing, even if that is what it appeared to be. There must be some sign of him - some scent, some track or some trail. A piece of white fur caught on a thorn, or a used path that he could have come from.

But as I search, I begin to doubt it.

There's no scent and no tracks. There's no white fur caught on a thorn. No path that he could have sprang from or place he could have been.

Eventually, I give up. There's nothing here. I can't waste time and energy searching for it. My heart feels heavy, and bitter disappointment fills me. Does this mean my quest is over before it's even started?

It's almost as if he never existed, I think, my thoughts dull. Maybe-

My thoughts are interrupted by an amused purr from behind me. Instinctively I spin, dropping into a defensive crouch with my claws unsheathed.

Then I stop.

It's the white tom.

He's here?

There's a cocky grin on his maw and a twinkle in his eyes - a rare blue, I note, taking in the stranger. He's small, but strong, and seemingly light on his paws. When he speaks, moons of wisdom echo in his voice, but he doesn't look any older than me.

"Hey, Fallenbreeze."

Surprise freezes me for a moment, then I regain control. "How do you know my name?" I ask sharply, without sheathing my claws.

His answer is more confusing, not less. "How would I not?"

I won't let him waste my time with questions, so I say the first thing that comes to mind. Flame. "You saved her life."

He lashes his tail once, and I see anger flash across his eyes. "Yes, I saved her. I saved her, and I saved you."

I frown. "Me?"

"I would do it again," he meows, his voice gentle. "I would do it a thousand times over - after all, I have nothing to lose."

"There's always something to lose," I mew bitterly. "Always."

He has no reply.

When, minutes later, he turns, I only hesitate for a moment before I follow. Away from the barn, and the mountains, and the clans, and my past, and towards the shadows of the unknown.

We pad in silence, unanswered questions still hanging in the air between us. The moment I open my mouth to speak, he disappears, and I have to run to find him again. The sun is low in the sky by the time he stops, and even then it's just to hunt. He takes no food, no matter what I say to try and persuade him. I can only guess why.

"You will know where to go," he tells me when we reach the edge of the trees. Ahead of us lies a meadow of long grass and pretty flowers that I cannot name, stretching as far as my eyes can see.

"Follow the sunset and you will not fail."

He turns, and I can tell he will disappear - perhaps forever.

"Wait!" I call. There's so much he hasn't told me - and more that I would never dare to ask. "Tell me your name, at least!"

"Snow," he whispers. And then, like he appeared, he is gone.

He's left me, now. I have a choice. I can either go forward or turn back. I step into the meadow, but not without sparing a thought for all the cats I left behind.

There was Froststar, and Lightningfoot, two cats I will never be able to forgive. And my brother, the third, the newborn kits - one of which I could and would have mentored - Brackencloud and Mapletree, Featherfall of ShadowClan and Gorseshadow, her brother, Lichenstar, Rushingreed, Tinderfur - and Flame, beautiful, sweet Flame, everything she could have had taken from her and she never once complained.

Rowanlily. Strong, brave, proud and free, but never seeking power. Learning from the mistakes she makes instead of hiding them. Willing to pay any price as long as it was her who did. And being there for me. Always being there for me when I needed her, whatever the cost.

If only I could speak to her now. If only we could be together. If only I could know she was safe, and well, and happy.

I have so much to tell her. I have so much that I never had the chance to say.

But our fates are a journey we will have to face alone.

Somewhere out there, there is a tom who would be willing to save me thousands of times over just to keep me safe. Somewhere out there, there is a purpose for me. Somewhere out there, I will have a chance to be the warrior that I never got to be.

One chance is all it takes.


I sit, dazed, alone. I hardly dare to look around; the fear from what I might see is too strong.

I can't be dead.

I can't.

The pain is too much. I don't know what to do. I can do nothing - nothing, but pad towards the only hope I may or may not have.

My paws lead me towards where the moon's light reaches the ground. Shadows fall across my face, and I am as I always have been. One half in darkness, one half in light.

But after everything, I can no longer tell which is which.

Bitter anger swells up inside me, but not for Brightpaw. Not for the badger. Not for Shadewhisper.

This is nobody's fault but mine.

How could I be so stupid? How could I be so cruel? How could I possibly do everything that I have, and not know?

I have killed Brightpaw's heart, and taken everything away from her. I defended my sister with words, when I should have defended her with everything I had. I shunned Shadewhisper, never talking, never forgetting, knowing that it could lead to this.

I let Froststar down, and Lightningfoot, too. I turned my back on StarClan. I left my clan and everything, everything I'd sworn to protect. I promised. I made a promise that day, when my mentor said I was ready. And now I've broken it.

I don't deserve to go to StarClan.

I never will.

The beauty of the sunrise is something I'll never forget. When I turn, I see the forest I've always known, the place I grew up in, as a kit, an apprentice, a warrior, mentor, deputy - the place I could never abandon. And I see it with two eyes, two shining, golden eyes that cannot believe what they are seeing.

I don't know what has happened. I don't understand.

And I don't care.

I run towards the forest without hesitation. I thought I had lost everything. I thought I had lost everything that I had, but I was wrong.

I'm not foolish. I know everything comes with a price.

If I'm the one who pays, then I will.

Home.

You only truly know what it means when you lose it. Fallenbreeze would know that, and now, so do I. And I promise, I swear to StarClan on my life and home - if she ever comes back into my life, I will never let her go.

I promised.

And I won't forget.

Maybe I don't deserve to go to StarClan, but I do deserve to die. I deserve to be forgotten. I deserve to watch my friends walk without me. I deserve it.

But I'm here.

Nothing is ever fair. Nothing is ever simple. But I have lived.

My paws are as light as the sun and I reach the camp in what feels like nothing. My heart is soaring in the clouds, and I don't think anything could take me down.

I am wrong.

Before I reach the camp, I spot a flash of white in the corner of my eye. Turning, I see the shape of cat behind the bracken.

"Who is it?" I call. "It's me, Rowanlily!"

She steps into the open, and I grin.

"It's really you?" Brightpaw asks, wonder in her voice. "I- I thought you were dead!"

So did I. But I'm not. And now I truly understand joy.

But all I do is nod. "It's really me."

"I thought you were dead, Rowanlily. Never, and I mean never, do that to me again."

"I won't, Brightpaw," I meow softly. "Never again - I promise."

She presses her fur against mine, and she's warm, beautifully warm, and I breath in her scent, and nothing could be better in the whole world. And for just a moment, we stand together, mentor and apprentice as one, facing the wrath of the rising storm.

But the moment won't last.

"You're cold," she says, drawing back from me. "And your scent-"

"What?" I ask, curiousity changing to confusion and then fear. "What's wrong with my scent?"

"Your eye!" With a yowl of horror, she leaps away from me. "You- your eye- it can't be you- I knew it couldn't be-"

"Wait!" I call, surprised by the terror in my own voice. "I-"

"You're not Rowanlily," she hisses, and I take a step back. Her gaze hardens, and she snarls, sunlight glinting off her unsheathed claws. "You can't fool me."

Shock freezes me to the ground. I forgot about my injuries - and now my own apprentice doesn't recognise me. She doesn't recognise me.

"Go from our territory, rogue," she yowls, and there is no trace in her voice of the Brightpaw I know and love. "Now, before it's too late!"


Rowanlily has died, but she still lives. Fallenbreeze has made her choice to keep moving forward instead of turning back. Doefall's prophecied darkness has come, and there is no one to save them.

Now the story can truly begin.

So, what did you think of chapter 8? Snow? Rowanlily's miraculous (or not, as she'll find later) recovery? Brightpaw?

Thanks for reading,

~ Fire & Bright ~