Chapter 9

Jo found Dean sitting at the table with Kevin and Cas researching. Dean glanced up to see Sam enter the room behind Jo. He turned away, clearing his throat. "So what are we going to do about the angels after us? They are not going to make healing Sam and getting Cas' grace back easy," Dean said.

Dean's question sparked a hint of a memory for Jo. She poked and prodded at it until she had a better picture. A grin spread across her face as she jumped up from the table. She disappeared for a moment before coming back with her backpack. Dean and Sam watched her rifle through it before pulling out a wooden box. She removed a padded object from the box and handed it to Kevin. Kevin unwrapped it to find a stone tablet the size of a CD.

"I think this might help. The light gave it to me; I have been carrying it around since then. The light said I would remember the instructions when it was needed; it said this would restore Sam and Castiel," she informed Kevin.

"But you came back before Sam even started the trials," Dean argued.

"Whoever or whatever was in the light knew you would need it eventually and that you would find me at the right time," Jo retorted.

Kevin looked at Sam, Cas and finally Dean.

"It isn't very big; I think I could translate this one fairly quickly. It is worth a shot," he said with a shrug.

"Great. Dean, there is something going on in a library about twenty miles from here, most likely just a poltergeist. I think you and Jo could take care of it pretty quickly. Cas and I can help Kevin with other research while you go," Sam said.

Dean sighed, slightly shaking his head.

"I don't think …" he started.

"Then don't. Just go," Sam glared at his brother.

"Cas, will you make sure Sam takes the potion ingredients I left? He has to take them every eight hours, but he sometimes losses track of time," Jo asked Cas. Dean thought he saw Jo smile and steal a glance at Sam as she spoke. Sam smiled at her remarks.

"I will be honored to ensure his health is a priority," Cas replied.

Thirty minutes later Jo and Dean were sitting in the Impala in an awkward silence. Dean wanted to tell her so many things, but he didn't want to interfere with anything that might be beginning with Jo and Sam. Jo turned on the radio, singing along softly as she looked out the window. Dean would occasionally sing along as well, but that was the closest they came to talking.

The library was easy find. It didn't take them long to figure out why there was a poltergeist. They had the whole job taken care of and were on their way back in a matter of hours. They had only spoke about anything directly related to the job, nothing else. Jo steeled herself for another awkward ride. At last she couldn't take it any more.

"You finally upgraded the radio. I always thought you were a purist," she teased.

"I didn't, Sam did," he replied stiffly.

"Oh."

Dean glanced at her.

"So, um, speaking of Sam," he said. "Thanks for taking care of him, watching out for him."

"No problem," she said warily.

"Um, so you got to know each other better. That's a good thing; you both deserve someone that gets the life but will treat you right," he said as he focused straight ahead.

"Dean, Sam and I are not together."

"You sure looked cozy when I walked in," he said his voice rising a little.

"Nothing happened. I did, I do, care about Sam. But at the time I didn't have all my memories," she tried to explain even though she was confused herself.

"You don't have to explain. You and Sam would be good together; you could have a house somewhere, a bunch of kids. Maybe even a dog. Sam could quit hunting or keep it up, stopping to see you and the kids when he could," Dean said. He tried to keep his tone neutral, truly wanting his brother to be happy, but a hint of bitterness crept out.

For a few minutes Jo let herself daydream about a life like that, a life with Sam. If she had never remembered her life, remembered Dean, she could have been content. Happy even. Deep in her heart and soul she knew that she could never live that life with anyone but Dean. She did care deeply for Sam but it was nothing compared to the love she felt for Dean. A love she had died to protect. The last thing she wanted to do was hurt Sam but there was not a way to avoid it. She thought back to his words earlier, realizing that Sam knew from the moment her memory came back that any chance for the two of them was gone. Even if Dean didn't want anything to do with her she would never be content to settle for a substitute.

To Dean the silence was agonizing. For all he knew Jo was thinking of what to name Sam's children. If it made Jo happy too he would do his best not to let either one of them know how much he was hurting.

"Dean," she said softly as the car stopped. Dean never turned to look at her.

"We're back. Jo, I promise not to interfere with whatever you and Sam have," he said brusquely before quickly going inside.