Disclaimer: I own nothing….but Andy, Biff, and The ass hole they call the Chief

Esme's POV

I woke up that morning. My body ached from the impact of the crash. My heart ached for my son, my son that they could not save. My beautiful baby boy, Carlisle. I turned my head to the right and Carlisle…"Big Carlisle" … was sitting in a chair by my bedside. His arms were crossed and his head laid down, asleep. I gently nudged him, he shot up quickly.

"What… what…. Who needs me?"

"Carlisle," I giggled "You fell asleep."

"Oh… I did "he said as he hopped off his chair.

"Yes, you did" I smiled.

"Oh well uhh… how are you feeling?" he asked

"On the inside or the out."

"A….well….both."

"Well on the outside I ache, and on the inside I want to die." I responded "Why."

"Why what?" he looked puzzled.

"Why him, why my child, why my son. He was so innocent, so pure…. Why couldn't it have been me?

"Because people need you Esme."

"Who needs me?" I huffed "I'm useless. I can't be loved. I don't deserve it. No one Carlisle, no one needs me.

"Some one needs you Esme. I promise some on needs you." he sounded distressed.

"Who," I asked "who needs me?"

"Well….uhh… I don't …. a… know."

"See no one."

Carlisle was now pacing the floor. He looked nervous or something. He finally turned towards me. The he ran to my side again. I was afraid.

"Esme" he shouted "I need you. I couldn't let you die. You are my life, Esme. You are the reason I'm standing in this room. You are the reason I made it through medical school. If I had never met yo, I wouldn't be like lis today." He sat down at the edge of the bed. "Esme" he cupped my face in his hand "I…I…I…I love you.

I was shocked. My eyes began to water. He moved in closer kissing me. It was not just a kiss but a kiss of pure passion. He pulled away and looked down.

"I'm sorry" he mumbled and looked back at me.

"Don't be" I whispered. I moved in closer and kissed him this time. This kiss was yet another one full of passion. I could live in this moment forever.

"CARLISLE CULLEN!!!!" a voice boomed.

Carlisle and I both pulled away. He gently laid e back down on to the bed and ran his finger through his hair.

"Y…Yes sir." He sounded nervous.

"What did I tell you about becoming attached!?!?" the chief doctor screamed.

"Ohhhh someone's in trouble" a brown haired doctor whistled while another blond one watch with a smirk on his face.

I had to do something. I couldn't let this man get fired. He had done so much for me.

"No please, don't fire him." I stuttered "I… I kissed him."

The doctors stared at me. They all looked like they wouldn't believe me. I didn't want to get caught in lie.

"Alright," The chief doctor replied "Don't lewt it happen again."

"I won't" I promised. He left the room

"Thank you" Carlisle breathed a sigh of relief.

"It's really no problem. I didn't want you to lose your job because of me."

"Oh…well thanks for that too, but I was talking about this." He pointed to his lips. I couldn't help but laugh.

"Ya know Carlisle" the brown haired doctor spoke up. "We have oxygen masks for that. You don't need to give her mouth to mouth." He then proceeded to take a small clear mask and attempted to stick it on my face, until Carlisle stopped him.

"No, Biff, Carlisle was just sucking face with a patient." The other blond doctor spoke. I lushed a bright shade of red.

"Thank you for pointing that out Andy." Carlisle snapped.

'Hey just speaking the truth my friend." He replied.

Carlisle came over and put an arm around me and kissed the top of my head.

"Oh, Esme" He began. "This is Andy" He pointed to the blond doctor. " and tis is Biff." He pointed to the doctor who was flailing his arms over his head.

"Hello" I replied "I'm Esme."

"HI ESME!!!" Biff yelled.

"Sorry, he's the idiot, Andy explained "Carlisle is the workaholic and I'm the incredibly hot one.

"I've think you've got it wrong though." I exclaimed.

"What do you mean?" he asked.

"I think Carlisle is the compassionate on."

I could tell Carlisle was flattered; Andy rolled his eyes, and Biff shook his head rapidly.

"Do you really feel that way?" he asked

Well of course!" I smiled. He pulled me close . These little actions were actually helping me cope with the loss of my son. These three men were actually helping feel better for the first time.

"So What's on my schedule today boys." Carlisle asked his friends.

"You're going home." Andy replied.

Carlisle's POV

WHAT!?!? I screamed in my head. I can't leave. No, not yet.

"Why?" I asked.

"Chief said you stayed longer than needed last night and you need to go home." Biff stated "and if you don't go home you're fired."

I had no choice but to leave. However, tonight I did have the late shift. I hugged Esme good-bye. I was a little reluctant leaving her alone with Andy and Biff, but I know they would take good care of her.

When I drove home, I was just on top of the world. I walked upstairs and unlocked my apartment and for the first time in one year, I turned on the light.

Wow, my apartment was even more gray then before. I had cloths in a heap at the edge of my bedroom. The dishes were piled in the sink. I opened the refrigerator it held some takeout from about a month ago and some green stuff that was chicken at one point…eww…The carpet could use a serious vacuuming. Not to mention that Biff and Andy had stayed over last night when I was working at the hospital. Let's just say the bathroom was a little less then toxic.

I began cleaning the house. I started by cleaning up the laundry. Then I moved to the dishes and cleaned them with soap and water, they were disgusting. I put on my gas mask and gloves to dispose of the decrepit food. Finally I moved to the bathroom…..WHAT IN THE HELL DID THEY DO IN HERE? It would take an army to clean this bathroom. I shut the door. I would use the bathroom in the hallway.

I needed something to kill time. I decided to listen to my messages.

"Mail box 1 you have 27 mew messages"…..Oh shit.

"Message 1- Hi Carlisle darling it's mummy"-delete

"Message 2- Carlisle Its Mum" –delete

"Message 3- It's mu…" –delete

"Message 4- Carlisle pick up the phone it's your mother. I need to talk" - delete

"Message 5- Hi Carlisle it's mum…I was wondering…die you die is that why…" –delete, delete, delete, delete, delete, delete, 16 messages later.

"Message 27- Hi Doctor Cullen, this is Penny from Fork Hospital. We would love to have you come work with us here. Please give us a call at 813-627-3343."

The job I had applied for wanted me. Biff and Andy had gotten their calls early this morning. I was so excited. I loved Washington. It was a small town with a new hospital. I called them back and accepted the position. I would be leaving at the end of the week. I would leave New York behind forever… which meant leaving behind my Esme.

I had just found her and we were rekindling our friendship. I couldn't leave her all alone I New York. What kind of person would I be if I did that? However, I had options

Option A) I could call the hospital back and decline the job. – No

Option B) I could leave Esme here in New York while I lived in Washington. - Defiantly No!!! NO, NO, NO!!!! Never in a million years!!!

Option C) Ask Esme to come with me to Washington with me- BINGO!!!

It was a long shot, but I had to try. I couldn't turn down the job, but I would never leave my Esme here alone. She has to come with me. I would bring it up to her tonight, but as for right now I would pray that she would come.