Happy reading! Comment below, thank you all for your comments and support :) I will be working on the my other story "Back to Abnegation" for the next few nights. I will update this one again soon though :)
Saturday
Chapter 9
Tobias P.O.V
It has been hours since my lips touched Tris' forehead, yet they still tingle from the warmth. I barely slept thinking what it would be like to hold her in my arms, to kiss her hair while she slept, to kiss her lips.
It's no secret I have been around the block and back with numerous of women, but never have I really been on a date. I haven't kissed a woman since high school. I have never really slept with someone in my arms before. Sure I have had sleep overs with women. But usually once they passed out in my bed, I would gladly roll over and sleep on the edge far enough not to even touch her. Again most of the time once I finished with the girl in my bed, I was really done with her. I know that's an asshole move. But its the truth. I never wanted intimacy, I just wanted to satisfy my own craving and get on with it. Hell we are all adults, women have needs too.
But with Tris, I know it could never be like that. I would never think about stripping her down, taking her from behind and than telling her to leave. No. With Tris I would take my time, kissing her with all the passion I have. I would take my time cherishing every inch of her, unwrapping her slowly like if she was the best Christmas present any man would ever receive. I would want to keep my eyes on her, watch her take pleasure. I would gladly kiss and cherish every part of her. With Tris I would take pleasure simply by holding her tightly while she slept safe and warm in my arms. With Tris I would remain as close to her as humanly possible through out the night. I would gladly wake her up with a kiss on her forehead each other with breakfast waiting for her.
My alarm goes off, telling me its time to face the day as a married man. A married man? I look down at the ring that resides on my finger. I you had asked me a year ago, even a month ago, if I ever thought I would think about marriage? I would have told you no fucking way. I'm Four, I don't do relationships, I don't do kids. I don't do happy endings. I don't know whats happening to me.. but that answer might be second guessed when it comes to Tris.
I stand and prepared myself for the day. I shower and dress, don't bother shaving, seeing I shaved yesterday. Little stubble, never bothered anyone.
When I walk out of my room, and just like yesterday both Tris and Ethan are in their room. Ethan is sitting on the bed watching yet another dinosaur movie. Tris however is finishing up in the bathroom.
"Hey there Buddy. Did you sleep well?" I greet Ethan.
When he sees me coming into the room, he scotches over making room for me to sit on the bed. He still hasn't said a word to me. But the small acts shows that he wants my company.
I am however dumbfounded when I look at the dresser in the room. There lays different types of medication, ointments, and inhalers. When I take a closer look, I see the name is all belongs to... Ethan Prior.
"Good morning, Tobias." Tris greets me.
"Morning, Love." I take the sight of her in. I notice her bare legs first, her white jean short giving her small curves the right attention it deserves. Than I notice her simple blue v-neck shirt. I wonder if she was to bend over, if the shirt would give any clue to what lies underneath. "Hey I don't want to pry or anything but what is all this?" I point to all the medications that are on the dresser.
"Oh I call it Ethan's bar." She gives me a smile as she steps closer. She points to each medication and explains it. "Well, you have Adderall which is to help Ethan focus better. Clondine to help his hyperness. I give him a small dose in the morning to help him and than at night he gets a higher dose to help ease anxiety and help him sleep. Than the orange inhaler is a preventive medication, the red is his rescue inhaler. He suffers from asthma. Ethan also has a skin condition called eczema. Which is really dried skin, can itch and crack sometimes even bleed. He gets petroleum jelly to help prevent but if it gets really bad he gets this tub. Which contains steroids so I don't like to give it to him unless I really have to. He is also allergic to peanuts, so if by any chance he cant breath he has a epipen. The rest are fevers and pain relievers." She must see the overwhelming look on my face because she adds, "It's looks worst than what it really is." Worst than it looks? How in the world do you keep track of everything?
"Any who, should we go? Or are we waiting for Zeke and Shauna?" She asks.
Zeke and Shauna shit? Good fucking question. I pull out my phone but before I can make the call to answer that question, a knock rips through the door. I smirk at Tris before going to the door of our suit. No big surprise when I look through the peep hole. I swing the door open to reveal the wide awake Zeke and Shauna. The moment I see the look on Zeke's face, almost makes me want to throw the door on his face and yell out wrong door. This is going to be a long day for sure.
"So do you guys consummate your marriage late night?" Zeke ask with a wide grin.
"Zeke be respectful, there is a kid that can hear you."
"Oh sorry Four, I forgot to take your training wheels off before we left the city." Seriously? I look at Shauna like "I will kill him. Fair warning!" Luckily Shauna is on the same thinking track I am because out of no where we hear a loud smack, and Zeke's head wipes forward. Thank you, Shauna!
"Damn woman that hurt!" Zeke says rubbing the back of his neck. Serves you right Dumb ass!
"Zeke language, please!" Tris says form behind me.
"Sorry, Tris!" Zeke apologizes, but still rubbing that spot where Shauna smacked him.
Suddenly I hear the stomping of a seven year old, and he roars as he nears us. From what I have seen he doesn't mind Shauna. At least he has no reactions really towards her. Zeke on the other hand, he stomps towards tilts his head right and then tilts his head left. He snaps his jaw open and close like a Trex would catching a pry. Almost like he is pre warning Zeke, Ethan doesn't attack though. Which tells us that he is still figuring out Zeke and hasn't made his mind. I wonder if Tris would kill me if I bribe Ethan in taking a bite out of Zeke for me?
"Any ways we need to be heading down there." Zeke says taking Shauna's hand and leading her out the door.
"Shall we Mrs. Eaton." I tease Tris. Holding out my hand for her to take. Although something about this moment, feels right. Calling her Mrs. Eaton, my name. Waiting for her to take my hand... Will she take it? Just when I am about to let my hand drop to my side and disappointment starts to creep in, she gives me a smile that meets her eyes and take my hand. The moment Tris' hand entangles with mine, I feel the familiar zing run through my hand, through my arm, I swear it aims for my heart.
"Come on, Ethan." Tris says holding her other hand for Ethan to take. We head out one happy family.
Tris P.O.V
We check in at the tables that sit outside the conference room that is reserved for Amar's company retreat. There are two women checking people in. One the crosses off names while the other write their name on the name tag and hands it to the families as they walk through. Both woman are attractive, one is average built long brown hair while the other one has short black hair and has a lot of special curves. Zeke and Shauna check in first, followed by our family. I notice the two woman at the desk eye what should be my husband. Surprising Tobias pays no attention to the women, he also never lets go of my hand.
"And who might you be handsome?" The brunet asks.
"Mr. and Mrs. Four and Tris Eaton, and our son Ethan." Four informs the woman whose name tag says is Lauren. The moment Tobias says "our married" names, I take great pleasure in watching her disappointment on her face.
To be truthful, I know how she feels. I felt that way each time I saw Tobias take another woman into his office for his "lunch time," he would shut the door and the blinds. I knew what he was doing with those woman in his offie. His after pleasure smile would be plastered on his face, the rest of the work day. Of course that woman would never be seen again. I was thankful he stopped bringing them into his office after the first year of me working there. I would feel so awkward walking to his office after he has had a girl there, I kept telling myself I was scared of what I would find or sit on. But the truth is I was little disappointed. I always thought Tobias deserved better than just having one time thing, a man like him needs and deserves a wife that would worship him in every way.
Which remainds me of that weird kiss he gave me on my forehead last night, the shooting zing that I got from his lips. Sad to admit it made my mind little cloudy. I was almost glad he didn't kiss me, like I thought he was about to. Almost glad. It would make things much worst between us when the time comes to part ways again. I need to keep my head clear and my heart gaurded.
We enter the large spacious room that hold at least fifteen large round tables. There is a stage with a podium at the front of the room as well. Of the back wall of the room, are tables lined up with hot food and pastries and a beverage bar with juices, milk, and coffee. We head towards the table where Zeke and Shauna are sitting at. It amazes me, all this time Tobias hasn't let go of my hand. It gives me such a calming comforting feeling on me. It's like no matter what we are in it together. I know, it gives me a false sense of security but for now I will take it. For just this week. Four pulls out both mine and Ethan's chair and than takes the chair that is closes to Shauna, placing Ethan right between both Tobias and I. I see Ethan immediately getting tiresome of being still, I know it wont be long until he lets go of his self control. I pull out my phone and hand it off to him for the time being. As he busy himself on my phone playing the latest dinosaur learn how to count game.
"Good morning, Everyone and welcome to the annual company retreat. Once a year I like to treat the families that work so hard for this company day in and day out. To spend one week together as a family and have fun together. Now on your tables you will find our agenda, if you didn't receive one when you first checked into your rooms. I hope everyone of you all enjoy your week. Alright every one lets eat up and have a great time mingling." The man I am assuming is Amar says with both hands in the air.
Four sits with Ethan while I get up to fill two plates for both Ethan and I. They don't have cereal but I do notice the waffles for Ethan. As per I, I load my plate with eggs, bacon, and fruit. Than I get a cup of much needed coffee and get Ethan chocolate milk. Once we are settled, I thank Tobias for looking after Ethan and allow him to get himself a plate. I notice that before he walks off though, he almost lingers like he is unsure what he should do. When I look up at him curios to what he is doing. He leans into me planting a once again lingering kiss on my forehead. This right here, I can get use to.
When our meal is almost over, I see Amar making his rounds to each table. When he approaches our table, I swear I feel like I will loose my breakfast. I see Amar approach Zeke first. Zeke introduces Amar to his fiance Shauna and I watch them shack hands with each other. Than Amar walks over to Tobias.
"Well Four, how are you doing?" Amar asks taking a better look at both Ethan and I. "And I see you brought your beautiful family. Hi I'm Amar. It's very nice to meet you." Amar says to me, I take his hand that he holds out and shake it firmly. He than looks down at Ethan, who refuses to look up. "And who is this little guy?" Amar asks.
"This is our son, Ethan." Tobias says. "He doesn't do well with strangers." Tobias tells Amar.
"Oh well that's ok." Amar says and than turning back to Tobias. "Unfortunate many of my top associates haven't been able to make it out here just yet, but they are scheduled to join us soon. I am looking forward to you guys meeting my head sales agent. I am hoping you both to work along side with him in the future. I would also like for you to meet our event specialist." Amar says but than Ethan gets his attention.
Ethan takes notice to Tobias' words, he raises his little head and tilts it at Tobias. He looks as if he is trying to figure something out."Daddy, can we go to the park?" Ethan ask. He looks up at Tobias still not able to make full eye contact but still speaking and looking up towards Tobias. Tobias and I have the same expression on our faces are in a state of shock, and emotional at the same time. Oh my god! The loud fork being dropped on a plate tears both away from the little boy that sits between us. When I look up I see Zeke just as stun as we are.
Ethan talked. He spoke to Tobias. He asked Tobias to take him to the park! He called Tobias Daddy! Tobias looks at me, not knowing how to respond. Unfortunately I have no answer as well.
How do you deal with a little boy who has been asking about his father, and is accepting another man who really isn't his father to be his father? How do you correct him without mixed and hurtful feelings? We have been wanting and working towards Ethan showing and being comfortable with Tobias for weeks now, and now he is. Ethan is showing how comfortable he is by calling Tobias, Daddy. I look up for any clue to how Tobias is feeling about this moment, he must be asking the same questions I am because our eyes meet at the same time. That's when I see it, mixed emotions between admiration, loyal, proud, joy, and love. Love? Can that be true?
Tobias P.O.V
Daddy? Did Ethan just call me, Daddy? How I wish he would ask the same question he just did, again. I want to hear it from him. I want confirm that it came from him. I close my jaw that I didn't know fall open towards the floor. I glance up at Tris hoping that she isn't upset with me. But the truth is I am at all. Any man would be and should be proud to be called Daddy by this little boy. But at the same time I don't want to over step my boundaries, I don't want Tris to be upset. But now isn't the best place to talk about what to do and what to say to Ethan. No matter how much I want to tell him that I may not be his father when it comes to blood... But if he would have me, I would like nothing more than to be his father. That's if he and Tris would have me.
Wow a father? A family? What in the world has happened to me? How did I become from such a hard, non feeling, can't love anyone man. To now a softy.
"Well I guess I'll leave you and your family to get to it. Sounds like someone needs to burn some energy off." I raise a eye brow at Amar, not sure what he is talking about. "I meant the boy, Four." He says pointing down with his eyes. When I follow his gaze I see Ethan's feet swinging and a high speed rate. Poor kid he is trying so hard but struggling to keep it all together.
"Let's ask your Mommy, make sure she is ok with that?" I tell Ethan. I can't seem to keep this goofy smile off my face. I can only imagine what I look like to Tris right now.
"Umm yea sounds like a a great idea." She says. I can see, she is still shocked at what Ethan has called me.
"We'll see you guys later. Maybe meet up for dinner." I suggest glancing between Shauna, Zeke, and Tris. I raise to my feet, while noticing no one has yet to give me a answer. They are all not only stun by Ethan but also shocked at my response.
Not like before Ethan hasn't just choosing to hold on to Tris. But he chooses to be in the middle of both of us, taking a good hold of both our hands while make our way to the playground. Tris has yet say anything. While every minute passes I worry that I have done something wrong. That she is upset with me. The minute the playground comes into view, Ethan lets go of both our hands and makes a run for it. Or should I say stomp for it. I laugh at the sight of Ethan being so happy and is unable to hold it back.
"Tobias, I think we need to talk about this." Tris says closing he gap that was between us.
I reach down between us and take her hand in mine. I know what I want. But not ready for rejection if thats where this is going. "I know, how about we talk about things tonight after Ethan goes to bed? I really been enjoying our talks at night." I suggest to her. She nods and seems to agree. "But Tris, so you can stop over thinking... I'm not going anywhere." I confess to her. We find a bench to sit at and watch Ethan chase the other kids in the park. The warm sun hits our skin and it feels so good against our skin.
Tris. P.O.V
Today has been exhausting, long, and extremely confusing and I'm not just talking for me. I know Ethan feels it too. I felt so guilty seeing him struggle to take a bath. I even tried to get him excited to take one by making it a bubble bath with all his little dinosaurs. But he lasted maybe ten minutes before I started to see his eyes cloudy.
He played for hours in the playground than we decided to have lunch in the suit. Of course we had another adventure after lunch, we spent a in the kids area. Ethan colored and played with legos and they even entrained the kids with a magic show. Ethan was beyond delighted. When dinner rolled around we met with Zeke and Shauna and went to the Italian restaurant located in the resort's main building. Once we got back in the suit I knew it wouldn't be long before Ethan passes out for the night. We are usually not so active all day long. I didn't even have to read him his bed time story. The minute his head landed on that pillow and he felt the weight from his weight blanket hit him... he was a goner.
I decide to take a quick shower to freshen up before joining Tobias in the living room to talk. I really don't know what to think about today. A part of me is pleased that Ethan actually found comfort and liking to Tobias. But the other part of me doesn't know if its wrong. I don't want Ethan to be confused and be disappointed come tomorrow when its time for Tobias to leave us. But at the same time I hate denying him something that he so disparity needs and wants. I also wouldn't want to force anything on Tobias. Ethan is my son, my problem. Tobias shouldn't feel obligated because of our situation... "I'm not going anywhere," is what Tobias said earlier. Why would he say that? And what is with the kisses on the forehead? He has done it now to me several times today... it cant be for show benefits. He does it when no one is around. This is beyond confusing... I can only imagine how Ethan is feeling.
I finish up with my shower, dry and change. I'm not wearing anything special, I figure we are just going to sit and talk like he suggesting. There for I decide on my sleeping shorts, and tank top pajamas. Wishing now that I had brought my sport bra, I keep my lacy black bra on. I'll take it off when I get into bed later.
"Hey." I say as I claim onto the couch.
Tobias look so comfortable he is wearing a white under shirt, and black sweat pants. He also has his right arm extended on the back of the couch, with one leg curled under him and the other just hanging. He is holding the remote with in his left hand suffering through the channels when I come out of my room. Wow laid back, pajama clothing, and still manages to look deadly sexy.
"Hey you." He looks up at me and smiles. Did I just imagine his eyes looking over my whole body from top to bottom. Na... I must be going crazy. "How about some wine? So we can relax and talk." He offers. For some reason I am unable to form any words at the moment so I nod as my answer. I watch him as he body smoothly stands up and walks over the kitchen. The way his sweatpants hang so low on his hips, makes you wonder what he looks like under those things... Stop it Tris! I try so hard but fail to keep my eyes glued on the floor when I see him making his way back to the couch. He hands me my glass of wine, as he is drinking a beer instead.
"So how was Ethan?" Tobias asks.
"He is tired. Didn't even get to read to him, poor baby fell asleep the moment his head hit the pillow." I say with a small chuckle. This is Ethan we are talking about, usually he argues his way out of bed. Or at least he tries.
"Well in a way I'm glad. He needed the rest. But than again I'm sorry we tired him out so good." Tobias expresses. "Tris, I meant what I said in the park. I don't plan to go any where."
"Tobias, you have to understand how confusing this all must be for him." I try to explain but he cuts me off.
"Tris, I know this is confusing. Hell I'm twenty eight years old and I'm beyond confused." I looks down at the label on his beer bottle like its the most fascinating this in the world. "I care about Ethan, Tris. More than I should. I... I also care about his mother too. More than I should."
"Tobias?"
"I have a confession... I have never been out on a real date before. Not a real get dressed, go out, take girl home, respectable date. Wow that sounds really pathetic, huh? He finally puts his beer bottle on the coffee table. After a few moments, I see him starting to scratch the back of his neck. "Would you go out.. on a date with me, Tris. We don't have to make any hard choices tonight. We can enjoy our time together... see where this can go."
"What?" Am I hearing this right? Tobias Eaton, Four, the hottest man I have ever seen wants to go out on a date.. with me?
"I promise... to keep personal and professional separate from us. I swear, Tris. I also hope that if what ever happens you would allow me time with Ethan. I really like him, I think he is amazing. I wouldn't want to ruin anything with him. I know this all seems confusing, but I want to figure this out." He reaches out for my hand and entwines our fingers together, letting them both rest on my lap. "Say something." He chuckles.
"Umm." I can't find any words at the moment. He wants to go out with me? He wants to see where this goes? Wait he wants to spend time with Ethan? Alright, I'm dreaming. Yup, must be having one of those amazing dreams. Any minute we are going to start having sex and than right before it gets good Ill wake up needing a cold shower.
"If you don't feel the same way..." I see his expression dropping. Oh no. "I wont hold it against you. I'm sorry I miss understood." He is about to stand, slowly letting go of my hand. But I squeeze is hand tighter not letting go. This gets his attention, he stops and glances at me.
"Tobias, I.. I don't know what to say. I mean..." I cant speak.
"What does your heart say, Tris?"
"Tobias, I'm just. I don't understand. I'm not pretty, I don't have a body of a model, I have a child, a special needs child, I have baggage... Why would you want to be with me?" I confess my own insecurities. I haven't felt this vulnerable since Eric. I hated it, as much as I do now.
"Tris, your the most selfless, bravest, smartest, kindest, and honest person I have ever met. Not pretty? Your right... Your beautiful and your not even trying. Look at you... hair in a messy bun, sleeping shorts with a tank top, no makeup, and yet you are sexy as hell. As for Ethan... that little boy is the most amazing, creative, friendly little boy I have ever seen. Do you know how proud I am today... Tris, he called me his father. Any man in their right mind would be proud of that title. I know I'm not his father, but maybe we can figure that out. I would love to sit down and talk with him about it. I have no problems with him calling me Daddy if that's how he feels." He takes a breath. "I have baggage too. I'm not perfect, fair from it. But I just... don't want that to stop us. Stop what we can be. Not any more."
"Any more?" I ask.
"I've felt... this way for a while. But I just like I said I have baggage and I don't want it to effect you and Ethan." He says. "Listen lets go out tomorrow night. We can have Shauna and Zeke stay with Ethan. We can even wait til after he is asleep to make it more easier on him." He offers.
I nod. "That sounds fair." I answer. Holy shit. He leans in slowly but not aiming for my lips, never my lips. He gives me another lingering kiss on my forehead.
"Thank you." He says, his eyes percing through me. We continue talking about this and that, trying to keep our conversation light for the rest of the night. I can't help but wonder what life would be like married with Tobias.
