Irina, as it turned out, shared some of my concerns with our advisors. She hadn't noted all of the things I had, and I wasn't sure she agreed with all the conclusions I'd drawn, but she did agree that the situation would need looking into, and soon. If our advisors were planning something, we had to stop them before their plan came to fruition.
We'd have to start small, however, or so Irina said; apparently, dismissing at least half our advisors without warning or any further plan was a bad idea. I could understand that, even if I wasn't entirely sure that keeping them on wasn't a worse idea, so I allowed Irina to take the lead in slowly weeding out the advisors. Unless we had proof of treason, we didn't want to make any accusations, but we could look for that proof and start weakening the position of some of the advisors we trusted the least. I'd insisted that Lord Alric be one of those advisors; I didn't trust him a single bit.
And then one night, about a week into that, Irina told me that she had missed her courses for the second month in a row.
"They could still be late," she allowed, "but it seems unlikely. I've also been experiencing some nausea, which is common in the early stages of pregnancy."
"So you're with child," I said, forcing myself to believe the words as I spoke them. They still seemed strange and abstract, but the concept was no such thing, not anymore. Irina had a child in her womb. Irina had my child in her womb. We were going to be parents.
This was going to be an unmitigated disaster.
"I believe so, yes," Irina said. "Now comes the question of who to tell."
"We shouldn't tell the advisors," I said immediately. "We can't trust them."
"We still have no proof that they're not trustworthy," Irina countered. "And we'll need to announce it eventually. We should probably make an announcement next month, if the pregnancy seems to be continuing properly. And we should probably call in a physician soon, which someone is bound to notice."
"You want to tell a group of people who have unknown plans against us that you're going to be vulnerable for the next few months?" I demanded. "I never took you for a fool, Irina."
"You most certainly did, when we first met," Irina argued, her lips twitching into what looked almost like the smallest of smiles. "And I don't intend to allow myself to be particularly vulnerable."
"You will be," I protested. "You're carrying a child. Even you cannot continued unaffected."
"I don't intend to continue unaffected," Irina replied. "But I do intend to keep fulfilling my duties until such a time that I'm incapable of doing so."
"And that's when the knife will fall," I said with absolute certainty. I'd lived with Chernobog long enough to know that.
"What would you have me do?" Irina asked with a huff. "I agree that many of your advisors seem untrustworthy, but we cannot keep this a secret."
"At least call in a physician first," I urged. "To tell you if you're with child or not. But one you trust."
"I'll send for my old physician, back in Vysnia," Irina says. "I trust him to be discreet. And Magreta can attend to me as well."
"How long will it take for your physician to arrive?"
"Four days, give or take? Perhaps five?" Irina shrugs. "It takes two days to travel from here to there, and I imagine the man will need a day to gather his things."
I nodded. That gave us a week, or nearly, before Irina and I had to have this argument again. We would have it again, I was sure of it. Irina wasn't one to give up so easily, but neither was I. We truly were a horrible match in that regard.
"Then call for him," I said, "and we will learn whether we need to worry about this at all."
"If I'm not with child, we'll only have another worry to concern ourselves with," Irina remarked.
"Yes, but by the time we actually get you with child, perhaps we won't have a group of treacherous advisors to share the news with," I countered acidly.
"We'll deal with them," Irina said, sounding far less concerned than I thought she ought to be. "But I don't believe any of them will make a move quite yet."
"I'm not sure I agree," I replied. "What else would they have been talking about when we went to the meeting last week?"
"They could have been discussing a whole manner of things," Irina replied, irritation in her voice. She'd made a few such comments about my incessant paranoia in regards to the quickly hushed-up conversation, but I couldn't help but think it was important. Perhaps Irina was right and it wasn't, but even if that turned out to be the case, I'd never admit it to her.
"A whole manner of things they didn't want us to hear?" I countered. "It was suspicious, Irina, even you have to admit that."
"Some of your advisors have done suspicious things," Irina says diplomatically. "And we will get to the bottom of it, I swear to you. But at the moment, I think we ought to focus on the child. We can't move too quickly against your advisors anyway."
"I still don't see why not," I muttered.
"Mirnatius-"
"Fine, very well, we'll focus on the child," I huffed. "What do you want to discuss?"
"I don't know that there's much to discus at this moment," Irina replied. "I'll send for my physician, and then when we know for certain, we'll decide what to announce and whom to announce it to."
"And what do you intend to do when the child is born?" I asked. "I'm sure you'll want to return to your duties quickly, so do you intend to hire a nurse? You'll need a wet nurse, at the very least."
"I had thought to have Magreta care for the child," Irina replied. "She cared for me very well."
"Have you discussed the idea with her?" I asked. Frowning a little, I added, "How much do you discuss with her?"
"I trust Magreta," Irina replied, which meant she told her everything. "And she is very fond of the idea of caring for my child."
"She's growing old," I cautioned. "You might want to pick someone a bit younger and more able."
"Magreta is perfectly able," Irina retorted. "And I would trust her with my life. I won't entrust the care of my child to anyone I don't have complete faith in."
"Do you intend to keep me away from the child, then?" I asked dryly.
"I hadn't thought you'd want to spend much time with the child at all," Irina replied.
She was wrong. I wasn't quite sure why I wanted to spend time with a baby, but I did. Perhaps it was some paternal instinct to protect my child, although my father had certainly never felt such a thing. Whatever the source, the feeling was surprisingly strong.
"And if I do?" I countered. "Will I be allowed? Or do you intend to shape the new tsar without outside influence?"
"The child will be yours as much as mine," Irina replied. "Of course you can spend time with them."
"Perhaps we can do the opposite of a normal couple, and you can run things while I care for the children," I said dryly. I was joking, but as the words came out, I realized I didn't think they were truly that ridiculous. Irina rolled her eyes at them, though, so perhaps she did.
"Do you still intend to try to change the laws to allow a daughter to be your heir?" she asked.
"Why not?" I replied. "You're a better ruler than I am, so perhaps any daughter we have would be better than any son."
"Your advisors probably won't allow it," Irina warned.
"Well then, it's a good thing that I intend to clear them out, isn't it?"
"You can't merely dismiss anyone who doesn't agree with you," Irina scolded.
"I know that. If I could, I would have dismissed you already."
Irina rolled her eyes.
"But," I continued, "as you somehow seem to keep forgetting, I am the tsar, which means I don't really need my advisors' approval on such things. If I want to name my daughter my heir, I can do that, and they can all go to hell."
"Perhaps this is why none of your advisors seem particularly fond of you," Irina said, her voice dry.
"And perhaps a tsar shouldn't have to pander to a group of fools," I retorted. "You included, of course, my dear."
Irina rolled her eyes again. That was the third time in a very short period; I was clearly irritating her. I tried not too feel too triumphant about that.
"Shall we go to bed?" she asked. "Given that it seems nothing of importance will come from this conversation?"
"Whatever you wish, my tsarina," I replied, giving Irina a sarcastic bow. "Although, perhaps we ought to check with our advisors first?"
Irina huffed and climbed into bed. I followed her, facing away from her and knowing that behind me, she was facing away as well. She always did.
"Goodnight, Mirnatius," she said, blowing out the candle, and as usual, I didn't reply. I never did. I thought I heard Irina sigh, then she settled down into her pillow and apparently went to sleep.
I didn't fall asleep that quickly, of course. Irina's ability to fall asleep so quickly was not one I shared. Some nights, I hardly slept at all, and often I lay awake for hours. It was the worst when there was something on my mind, and between the impending betrayal from my advisors and the chid in Irina's womb, I had a lot to think about. I wasn't sure I would be sleeping at all that night.
Then I heard Irina roll over, and a moment later, she draped an arm over my waist.
"Excuse me," I said coldly, the weight of her arm uncomfortable and oppressive, "but what do you think you're doing?"
Irina's only response was a soft, satisfied sigh, and I realized she was asleep. She'd rolled over in her sleep and draped herself over me, and it was taking every scrap of willpower I had not to shove her off the bed in response.
I shifted slightly, but all that did was make Irina snuggle closer to me. I still couldn't quite believe she was doing this, and I knew she'd be horrified to know it, but apparently her sleeping self wouldn't be easily dissuaded. I could wake her up, I supposed, and that would make her pull away, but I didn't want to wake her. That would mean we'd have to talk, and I was done talking to Irina for the night. Perhaps I could figure out a way to wake her without her realizing I'd done it, then I could fake sleep to avoid a conversation, but Irina had proven adept at telling when I was faking sleep, so I couldn't be sure that would work. No, the best solution would be to get her to move in her sleep.
Or, I supposed, I could figure out a way to ignore her touch and sleep with it.
It wasn't that bad, actually. I'd disliked it at first, but now that I'd grown a bit more used to the contact, I found it was almost a little nice. Irina was surprisingly warm, and having her body pressed against my back kept the cold night air from reaching it. She wasn't too warm, though, so I didn't think I'd grow overheated. And the contact was different enough from any encounters I'd had with Chernobog that it didn't provoke any memory-induced panic. Chernobog may have invited people into my bed, but he'd never allowed any cuddling, and what Irina was doing was very close to cuddling. No one had ever cuddled me before, not that I could think of, and so Irina's gentle touch was a new experience. The closest experience I'd ever had to this had also been with Irina, weeks ago, when she lay with her body pressed against mine. She hadn't been quite this close, and she hadn't draped herself over me, but the contact hadn't been entirely unpleasant then, and it wasn't entirely unpleasant now.
Tentatively, I closed my eyes, trying to breathe slowly and regularly until I fell asleep. It didn't work quickly, but insomnia had always plagued me, so I didn't think too much of it at first. I just kept breathing and trying, breathing and trying, and just when I'd been lying awake for so long that I thought perhaps I wouldn't get a wink of rest all night, I fell asleep.
My dreams were strangely pleasant that night, but when I woke, I didn't remember them at all.
Irina's physician arrived five days later, as expected. The man seemed knowledgable enough, and Irina clearly trusted him. To say that was good enough for me would have been an exaggeration, but I trusted that Irina wouldn't do anything too foolish. After all, the future of her beloved Lithvas was at stake.
While Irina was meeting with her physician, I had a meeting with Lord Alric. The timing was imperfect, and I didn't think either Irina or I liked it, but there was no way to reschedule it without giving Alric too much information, so there was no other choice. Irina, I was fairly certain, was worried I would burst right out and say something to Alric that would inform him of my suspicions, but she needn't have been. Just because I frequently accused her of wanting to assassinate me didn't mean I would do the same with everyone else. Irina had made her plans so absurdly obvious that to pretend I didn't see them coming would be ridiculous. Alric, on the other hand, had been subtle enough that I could let him think he'd gone unnoticed, and then he'd think he had the benefit of surprise without actually having it. I didn't know how much of Irina's concern came from wanting to keep any advantages we could over Alric, and how much came from her not believing that he was as much of a danger as I found him to be. Either way, though, she'd tried nearly as hard as I had to figure out a way to move the meeting without raising suspicions. There was no way to do it, though, so I'd have to meet with Alric alone.
I was growing rather tired of spending so much time alone with people who would love nothing more than to slip a sword between my ribs.
"Your Majesty!" Alric said when I reached our meeting place. "You're early. And where is the tsarina?"
"The tsarina had another matter to attend to," I replied. "Are you prepared already, or shall I wait for you to ready yourself?"
"We can begin," Alric said, standing next to his chair until I sat down. I took a bit of pleasure in doing so slowly. "Although, Your Majesty, would you not wish to postpone the meeting until the tsarina's matter is attended to?"
"I am the tsar, Lord Alric," I replied, my voice a little frosty. "I can assure you, I am perfectly capable of attending a meeting without my wife's aid."
"Yes, of course," Alric replied, nodding. "I apologize, Your Majesty, I shouldn't have implied otherwise."
"No, you shouldn't have," I agreed. "Now, shall we begin?"
"Of course." Alric pulled out a sheaf of papers, settling them in front of me. "These are the details on the trade agreements that you asked to see. Shall we go over them together?"
"I ought to read them over first," I replied, picking up the first paper and scanning it. The trade agreements with Casimir seemed ordinary enough, although there were a few things that made my brow furrow. I wondered if I'd been involved in coming up with these plans at all, or if they'd been passed under my father's rule. Given the visible age of the papers, I would guess the latter.
"Well," I said after a few minutes, settling the papers down, "shall we look at Casimir's proposed changes?"
"Of course," Alric agreed, handing over another sheaf of papers. "I believe most of his changes will be easy enough to implement, if we decide to do so."
I began to skim the paper, then I frowned, went back to the beginning, and began reading it more carefully. Perhaps Alric was right and the changes would be easy to implement, but I didn't think any of them would do Lithvas any good at all. There were a few that we could perhaps accept, given that we made a few changes, but many of them were completely ridiculous.
"Is this supposed to be a joke?" I asked, looking up at Alric. "How can Casimir expect us to pass these? Lithvas would end up bankrupted within the year."
Alric blinked, looking startled. "Your Majesty?"
"Have you read over these?" I asked, gesturing at the paper. "None of these changes will benefit Lithvas at all. Every single one of them would alter the deal in Casimir's favor. Exactly how foolish does he think we are?"
And how foolish are you, to speak like you support this when you're about to give it to me to read?
"I believe some of them will be good for us," Alric protested. "A few of Casimir's changes will be mutually beneficial."
"Perhaps," I allowed, "but hardly any. And there are some issues with the original trade agreement that aren't addressed."
Alric was barely able to keep from gaping. "Issues with the original agreement? You found some, Your Majesty?"
Clearly, without Irina present, Alric had expected me to simply pick up the papers, look at them briefly, and then agree to anything he said. He was a bigger fool than I thought. There was a time when I might have done that, yes, but it was always best to plan for the worst case scenario. On the occasions when it didn't come to pass, nothing else would seem particularly difficult.
"I did," I replied. "And I must say, I'm rather surprised that you didn't find them. Isn't that your job?"
"Well, Your Majesty-"
"And I'm stunned you didn't see the problems with Casimir's changes immediately," I added. "Someone who didn't know better might think you were deliberately trying to sabotage Lithvas."
"I would never, Your Majesty!"
I could agree that Alric's base motivation probably wasn't to destroy his country. He probably wanted to save it as much as Irina did. He just thought the way to save it was by giving it to Casimir. I had to hope that Irina didn't decide he was right.
I looked down at the trade agreement. "We'll need to make some changes," I said, looking up at Alric. "But on my terms, not Casimir's."
Alric nodded, and he seemed about to say something else when a servant scurried up to my side. "I have a message for you, from the tsarina," she told me, and I realized this was the girl who'd dumped the bucket of sand on Chernobog. "She needs to see you immediately."
"Then of course I will attend to her," I replied, standing. "We'll finish this another time."
"Of course, Your Majesty," Alric said, bowing. "I hope all is well with the tsarina."
I could only think of one reason that Irina would call for me with such urgency, and it was a good one. Of course, there were almost certainly a dozen bad reasons that simply hadn't occurred to me, but I wasn't about to share any of this information with Alric. I didn't even bother responding to him; I simply followed the servant girl to Irina's room, then dismissed her before I went inside.
"I'm with child," Irina burst out the second the door shut behind me. "The physician looked me over, and he confirmed it. We're going to have a baby."
I stared at Irina for a moment, unable to think of a intelligent single thing to say. "We- You're certain?"
"Completely," Irina replied. She was practically glowing in excitement. "I'm about two months along. And the physician thinks I seem healthy so far. He's going to stay here, to monitor the pregnancy."
"Yes, good," I agreed absently, not entirely certain what I was agreeing to. Irina was pregnant. Of course, we'd been aiming for that goal all along, but actually reaching it was another matter entirely. Irina was carrying our child. Irina was going to give birth to our child in seven months. I was going to be a father in less than a year. I couldn't quite wrap my mind around the concept.
"We ought to tell our advisors soon," Irina added. "We won't be able to hide it for long."
That snapped me out of my daze. "Absolutely not."
"Mirnatius-"
"I was the one who just finished a meeting with Lord Alric, not you. He's clearly in league with Casimir. The changes to the trade agreement that he tried to push me to implement were ridiculous. There wasn't a single one that wasn't tipped in Casimir's favor. They'd have bankrupted Lithvas if I'd agreed."
"I hope you didn't?" Irina said, her gaze and voice sharpening a bit.
"Of course not," I dismissed. "But Alric wanted me to. Either he's egregiously incompetent or he's a traitor. Either way, I want him gone."
"We may be able to dismiss him, but-"
"How much more proof do you need?" I demanded. "We are the tsar and tsarina. We don't need to justify our actions to anyone. If I want Alric dismissed, I will dismiss him, and anyone who disagrees can go to hell."
"Did you say anything to Alric that indicated that you suspect him?"
I thought back over the conversation. "Perhaps."
Irina sighed. "The reason I want to wait to dismiss Alric," she explained, "is I want to find out whom he's working with. He's not going to overthrow us on his own, and even with Casimir's help, he'll still need support from within Lithvas."
"So we get rid of all of our advisors and appoint new ones."
"We don't know if Alric is in league with all of our advisors," Irina countered. "And we don't know if his allies are limited to that group. He could be allied with other nobles, and if we dismiss him now, they'll go to ground and we'll never find them. But if we wait, we can root them all out at once."
The plan did make sense, I had to admit. There was one problem, though. "And what if Alric makes his move before we're able to identify his allies?"
Irina offered me a wry smile. "We merely have to hope he doesn't."
"And if he does?" I insisted. "Hoping will do us no good against an assassination attempt."
"What do you want me to say, Mirnatius?" Irina asked. "I cannot prepare for every eventuality. I can do my best, but you cannot expect the impossible from me."
You've already done the impossible, I wanted to protest. You freed me from Chernobog. That should not have been possible. What's one more miracle?
I didn't say it, of course. If Irina was unwilling to act on my behalf, I would be unlikely to convince her otherwise. I'd simply have to be on alert for any assassination attempts, and as useless as it was, I would have to hope they wouldn't occur.
"And do you still intend to tell your advisors that you are with child?" I demanded. "Even when they're clearly trying to betray you?"
"We cannot keep it a secret," Irina countered. "I will announce it at our next meeting."
I sighed. "Fine. On your own head be it."
It wouldn't be, and I knew it. If it fell on anyone's head, it would fall on mine. I'd just have to hope it didn't fall at all.
