My fingers glided over the keyboard as I began to sing the words to a song I'd written, and if you know me by now it was about Jake but secretly about Embry as well. I felt betrayed that he didnt even want to try and make me fall for him, was slowly starting to care about. I slowly came out of the intro to the song and headed into the first verse.
la da da da da
da da da da
ooh ooh yeah
you told me on a sunday
that it wasn't ganna work
i tried to cry myself to sleep
cause it was supposed to hurt
I took a breath as my fingers continued to glide over the keyboard, I licked over my lips as the tempo began to increase. I could feel it in my heart the feeling of being left behind and unwanted. I opened my eyes not even realizing they had been closed once I finished the song, I noticed the odd silence that filled my room and looked in the door way to see Bella, and my dad standing in the doorway. They seemed to be in awe of something, I folded my hands in my lap then chewed on my bottom lip.
"That was...amazing." My dad said, a blush tinting my cheeks.
"Thank you..." I whispered.
"So uhm, Bella wants you to go to the bonfire with her and Jake." He said making me roll my eyes.
"We saw how well the last time we all went out together went, I'd rather not." I told him, why were they doing this to me? I just wanted them to leave me alone and I didn't think that was asking for much considering how much time Bella had on her own.
"Well you don't have much of a choice in it, now get ready." My dad ordered making he groan and get up. I went to my closet and got dressed, I was wearing a light pink t shirt that clung to my now more profound curves. The jeans hugged my hips just a little snugger than they used to, but that was okay. I walked down stairs and grabbed a bottle of water, Jake was saying something to my dad. "Well, I'm ready." I said crossing my arms over my chest, Jake looked at me and froze. His eyes locked onto mine and I looked away awkwardly, he never looked at me like that before. I didn't think I looked that good for someone to stare at me like I was actually beautiful.
"Uhm, alright we're taking the rabbit cause Jake wants to test it out." Bella said to me and I nodded a little, the rabbit. The car that wasn't running with my engine another pang hit my heart and tugged at the invisible strings of my heart, good thing I was getting better at hiding my emotions. I followed Bella out to the car and climbed into the back seat, on the way to First Beach Jake kepted looking at me in the rearveiw mirror. It was really weirding me out, and at this moment I noticed a few things about him. One of those being; HE CUT HIS HAIR! I was absolutely infuriated. He promised me he would never cut his hair because I liked it so much, another being he was even more buff then the last time I saw him. Another thing; I'm not complaining but he has to know these sterorids are seriously bad for his health.
As we pulled up to a parking spot, I climbed out of the car and made my way to the familiar circle of friends who I used to hang out with all the time. Quil, also now buff beyond recognition, pulled me into a hug. I wrapped my arms around him, he was so warm and even that was an under statment.
"Your hot..." I said as I pulled away from him.
"Oh thanks, you too." He smiled making me laugh for the first time for what seemed like months.
"I'm mean jeez yeah your attractive but I actually meant your body temperature...are you sick or something?" I said to him smiling a bit and he shrugged a little acting like it wasn't anything to big.
"Well, as long as you're not sick." I said walking over to the fire to keep warm. I saw Jake talking to Bella and I felt my heart twitch, it still hurt and no matter how hard I tried I knew I'd always have feelings for him. Even if he saw me as some little girl who clung to him for protection, a saftey blanket to protect me from being alone. To protect me from not being able to have something in common with someone. His eyes met mine and I couldn't bring myself to look away, the look of adoration and love seemed to penetrate right through me. For a second I felt like the only thing that mattered, then his gaze slowly turned back to my sister who seemed to be clinging to him li9ke he was her blankie more than I ever had.
