BPOV
I wasn't sure what to make of the guy that Emmett had set me up with. At first, all I knew about the guy was that his name was Austin Marks, he ran a comic book store and he apparently wore nerd glasses. We had talked once over the phone to set up our date, and I found it a little odd that he wanted to meet and five and needed to be back to his store by eight that night. It seemed like a pretty tight schedule for a guy who made his money off of superheroes, but I figured that perhaps there was a conflict or Friday night was just a busy night in the comic book world. He seemed a nice enough guy on the phone, though we really hadn't discussed much but dinner plans and what we did for a living.
During the cab ride to the restaurant, I attempted to put Edward Cullen out of my head. It was hard since he was proving hard to shake out of my life. I had to admit Irina and Tia were right about him being the best in the web design business in our area, and despite our awkward introduction to each other, Edward was surprisingly and refreshingly professional when it came down to it. From our conversation that afternoon, I was a little shocked to find that Edward could not only be a nice guy but funny as well. And his family seemed like a bunch of interesting people. After all, it wasn't every day that your sister married an old Confederate or your esteemed doctor father got into a fist fight at a fancy, uptown restaurant.
I was also a little bit confused as to Edward's suggestion that I "skip" my date. It was also kind of weird that he offered to drive me to the date, but I figured Edward was just another one of those web geeks who could be socially awkward at times. It really would explain a lot about him if he was just offering to be nice. I decided not to read too much into Edward's motives, though. I mean, I was on a date with another guy that night and it felt a little unfair to be thinking about Edward when I was supposed to be getting to know Austin.
Initially, I was impressed by Austin's choice for our date. The Melting Pot was a funky, albeit pricey, fondue restaurant where patrons got to dip items in cheese, batter, chocolate and other sauces. It was a nice change of pace from the traditional, sit down and have your food brought to you place. Despite how nice the restaurant was, I found myself alone in the restaurant for fifteen minutes because Austin was late. I was relieved when Austin finally showed up since it stopped everyone else from giving me those "oh, you got stood up" sympathy glances. I am, unfortunately, way too familiar with that look.
Upon his arrival, Austin was at least nice enough to acknowledge he was late and apologize profusely. Apparently, there was a shipment that was supposed to go on sale that night at midnight, but the books hadn't arrived until four that afternoon, leaving him and his staff to scramble to get the display together. I had never heard of the series he was talking about, but apparently it was some huge manga really popular in the area and the reason he had to cut our date short was because of the party tonight when it went on sale. I wanted to ask him why he didn't want to reschedule our date for a more convenient time, but decided against it.
To be perfectly honest, I had expected him to be a nerdy kind of guy, but the man before me was almost thirty and trying to cling on to his "I'm not a Hipster" cooldom. He was ironically wearing a G.I. Joe shirt with a blazer and ratty jeans. His nerd glasses didn't even have glass in them, just frames he had probably picked up to accentuate his look. He also wore a scarf, which I found odd for a rather warm April day. He dominated most of the conversation and I found it hard to keep up with his references to anime and J-Pop bands I had never heard of. I had seen maybe one episode of Pokemon on accident, which made him laugh and not in the "I'm laughing with you" kind of way.
"So, Bella," Austin said, finally giving me a chance at conversation. "What is it you do?"
"I'm the personal assistant for the editor-in-chief of a women's magazine," I replied.
"So, a secretary?" Austin asked, his eyebrows raised.
"I believe the PC term is personal assistant," I said through gritted teeth.
"Do you just… take phone calls all day and junk?" Austin asked curiously.
"I work very hard," I said, a little annoyed at how often I had been using that phrase recently.
"I'm sure," Austin snorted. "I don't understand why you don't see how degrading that is to your gender."
"Excuse me? You're the one who admitted five minutes ago to having an extensive collection of My Little Pony memorabilia," I snorted.
"Hey, My Little Pony is a metaphor for life!" Austin snorted.
Things didn't go much better from there. As if our conversation wasn't bad enough, he ordered for me and I was slightly insulted when he told the waiter that I wanted a Diet Coke. I mean, yeah, I would have ordered one anyway, but I felt a little annoyed that he assumed that I wanted or needed a diet soda. By the time dessert rolled around, I was pretty much sick of the guy. Not even the chocolate fountain promising dipped strawberries and other delicacies could lure me to stay. I decided that eventually I would have to drag Rose or someone I could stand to the place if I wanted to get my fill of chocolatey delights. I feigned needing to use the restroom, grabbed my purse, and slunk out of the restaurant as quickly as I could. I knew I was making the right decision when the hostess gave me a sympathetic smile and mouthed "He's a jerk" as I was leaving. Looking at my phone, I realized it wasn't even seven yet.
Rose and Emmett were having a movie night together at the apartment, and I really didn't want to show up and ruin their evening by complaining about their bad date. It seemed like the millionth time they had scheduled a night in because I would be out only for me to return home early, complaining about another date gone awry. Sure, Rose would probably be secretly thrilled that Emmett's blind date wasn't my soulmate, giving her another chance to prove she was the better matchmaker, but I really wasn't in the mood. Instead, I found myself walking to Starbucks, ordering something big and frothy and sitting down at a table to contemplate why I was a douche magnet.
I suppose I went through the mental checklist every woman has after a long string of bad dates or failed relationships. Are my standards too high? Am I not pretty enough? Am I not smart enough? Do people think that my intelligence is a turnoff? Do I talk too much? Do I talk not enough? Am I boring? And ad nauseum in that general direction for about fifteen minutes. I thought about calling up someone, but who would I really call? My dad would threaten to bust a cap in the guy and then remind me there were plenty of nice, down home boys back in Forks in an attempt to get me to move back into his empty nest. My mother would probably laugh, tell me that my aura is beautiful, and then recommend the number of a male escort service in the Seattle area. I finished my drink and then decided to head back home. If I was lucky, I would be able to sneak back to my bedroom without being noticed by Rose or Emmett.
I wasn't lucky. I creeped down the hallway, shut the door as quietly as I could and tiptoed into the main part of the apartment only for Emmett and Rose to turn to face me from their position on the couch.
"Why are you home so early?" Emmett asked, his brow furrowed.
"I knew it! Your date was a dud!" Rose cheered excitedly.
"He couldn't have been that bad," Emmett huffed. Rose looked at me pointedly.
"I…uh… left before dessert because I couldn't stand him any more," I said.
"You gave up fruit dipped in chocolate? Wow, he must have been horrible," Rose snorted.
"What did he do? Maybe you could give him a second chance," Emmett bartered.
"He talked down to me the whole time because I don't read Japanese cartoons or listen to weird Japanese music," I replied. "He ordered for me, including ordering me a Diet Coke…"
"That asshole!" Rose screeched.
"…and I was never able to get a word in edgewise," I sighed. "And Emmett, for the record, guys who just wear plastic frames don't count as guys who wear nerd glasses. They count as wannabe hipster fashion plates."
"I think he wears contacts," Emmett shrugged.
"Why would you wear contacts and plastic frames rather than just wearing glasses?" Rose snorted.
"Anyway, I'm just going to hit the hay," I sighed, attempting to slink into my room. "You guys have fun." Rose and Emmett exchanged concerned looks as I kept my head down and headed into my room.
I got into something more comfortable and meant to pull up my laptop, hoping some funny pictures of cats could cheer me up. I don't know what happened between than and five minutes later when I was a puddle of sobs on my bed and Rose had forced her way into her room to comfort me. Emmett lingered a little in the doorway, seeming a little uncomfortable with all of the feelings in the room and also feeling a little bad himself that the guy he set me up with had bombed.
"It's okay, Bells," Rose said, smoothing my hair down, something I had always wished my mother would do in my childhood.
"What's wrong with me, Rose?" I asked her tearfully. "I mean, it has to be me, right? There is no way that I am just so unlucky I've only ever dated losers. There has got to be something wrong with me."
"There is nothing wrong with you," Rose insisted.
"Maybe I should have tried harder. Maybe I should have put up with it," I shook my head.
"If there is anything I learned in my 72-hour marriage it is that you don't want to be with someone you just feel like you're stuck with," Rose pointed out. "You want to be with someone you can't wait to see."
"But what if no one wants to be stuck with me?" I sobbed.
"I'm really sorry, Bells," Emmett said, seeming a little heartbroken himself. "I really thought you would hit it off. I mean, I know Austin is pretty focused on his career, but I thought… I mean, I never would have set you two up if I knew he was going to act like that."
"Don't feel bad," I shook my head at him.
"But it is my fault that I set you up with another loser," Emmett pointed out. "He's always been an okay guy… I guess… I don't know…"
"It's not your fault," I insisted.
"The two of you just didn't click," Rose replied. "It's no ones fault. What is it your mom always says, Bells?"
"That you have to kiss a lot of princes before you find your frog," I said, giggling slightly. For some reason, I had always been amused at my mother's dating philosophy. It had brought her to Phil, who I kind of thought was froggish anyhow.
"I think you made the right choice, for what its worth," Emmett said. "I'm really going to think differently of Austin now. I mean, what idiot orders a diet drink for a woman? You're supposed to say shit like 'oh honey, why do you always ask for one percent milk? You can drink whole.' You know, shit like that."
"You have never said 'shit like that' to me," Rose pointed out.
"You drink whole milk," Emmett pointed out. "Not that you don't need to. Shit. How did this come back on me?"
"Thanks guys, and you two should get back to your movie," I said. "I'm really sorry I ruined date night."
"You didn't ruin date night," Rose insisted.
"Yeah, she was making me watch 'Hellboy' again," Emmett said, pulling a face. "I just don't get that movie."
"That movie is a classic," Rose snorted.
"I'm not even going to dignify that with a response, Rose," I snorted.
"Ditto," Emmett nodded. Rose looked around for something in my room to throw at Emmett, but he stealthily moved back to the living room. Rose got up and followed behind, all the while delivering a lecture to him on the artistry behind "Hellboy."
A/N: My Little Pony is a metaphor for life.
