Chapter 9
"STOP! PLEASE GO AWAY! YOU DON'T LOVE ME SO PLEASE STOP!" Beatrice keeps yelling, I don't know what to say, or do, I just want to help her but I feel helpless. She keeps going.
" THINK OF OUR AGE DIFFERENCE JEANINE HOW COULD SOMEONE AS SPECIAL AND AMAZING AS YOU LIKE A TEENAGER? THIS IS SO WRONG YOU KNOW IT, THIS HAS MOVED WAY TO FAST HOW DO YOU KNOW YOUR FEELINGS FOR ME IN ONLY LIKE A MONTH AND A HALF, WHY WOULD YOU TELL ME AFTER A WEEK, THIS DOESN'T MAKE SENSE JEANINE!"
She just starts to cry, I feel horrible, I've done this to her.
"Beatrice, come out of the cubical so we can talk about this."
"There isn't anything to talk about"
"Of course there is…I care about you and I want you to be ok."
"This is insane, you're my teacher."
"Do you want to know what's so special about you Beatrice?...It's crazy because I don't even know when you became so important to me and I want to kiss you every minute, every hour every day for the rest of my life, I couldn't imagine my life without you and trust me I have thought that maybe its some stupid crush but its not only because your gorgeous but also because you are so intelligent you could rule the world, you have a kindness that I don't have, you are the perfect person and I would never want to scare you or hurt you and above all things I never want you out of my life, ever."
I feel like crying too. I hate this I wish I never met her so I didn't have to put her through this. She walks out of the cubical slowly and washes her face at the basin next to the one I'm leaning on. She starts to talk:
"I'm sorry Jeanine, I'm just so confused I'm not even sure if I really like you or maybe I like the thought of you liking me I'm just not sure."
"That is fine if your unsure, I just want you to know how I feel about you."
I lean over and give her a soft kiss on her cheek, it sends a rush through my body so I start to walk out, partly because I have a presentation to give soon but also because I so close to jumping onto her. I'm almost out the door when she stops me with a quiet:
"Wait"
I turn around and let her continue.
"Maybe we just need to spend more time alone together, so I can sort out my feelings."
"What do you suggest?"
"You could tutor me?"
This made me smile, as I couldn't think of anything better than spending more time with her.
