I didn't sleep very well and I had a dreadful headache the next day when I rose. Lucy chattered happily to Miss Heliotrope at breakfast and the noise aggravated me so much that I had to excuse myself to go and lie down.
It was agreed in my absence that Lucy should still visit the de Noir Castle. Adam professed a desire to stay at Moonacre with me, in case I should feel better later on and then we could join the others. Loveday seemed to think that this was a good idea as well.
Lucy came in to see me before she went out and I roused myself to hug her and wish her an enjoyable day. She seemed genuinely concerned about my head and offered to stay with me, but I wanted to be by myself to think and so I encouraged her to go. I wasn't happy that Robin was seemingly so enamoured with her, but I couldn't really blame him. Lucy was beautiful and she was kind and generous, that's why I was so fond of her. She kissed my forehead as she was about to go and then said,
"I'm sorry that Adam is staying behind when your head is bad. I will threaten him not to ask more questions." I smiled ruefully at her in response.
I was lay curled up on my bed when Loveday knocked gently at the door.
"Can I come in, Maria?" she asked. "I have brought you a drink."
I couldn't deny Loveday access even though I just wanted to be alone. She ducked her head as she came through the door, and perched on the side of my bed.
"Do you want to talk about it?" she asked as she reached out and stroked my hair.
"About what?" I replied mechanically, although I knew exactly what she was referring to. "I just have a headache. I didn't sleep too well."
"Are you sure that's all, Maria?" she brushed her fingers across my temples.
"Yes." I couldn't reply any further because I was suddenly terribly afraid that I was going to burst into tears and I didn't have the energy to deal with that.
Loveday sat with me for a while longer, and then realising I was not going to speak further, leaned over and kissed me.
"I will be back up to check on you later." She informed me. "Try and sleep for now, Maria."
So I did.
I managed to rouse myself at lunchtime and took some effort to make myself presentable. I gritted my teeth as I entered the dining room, expecting a torrent of questioning, but Loveday had obviously warned everyone not to push me too much and they complied.
Adam smiled at me and started to tell me about his walk around the grounds that morning. He was a good story teller and he amused me by describing the antics of a rabbit he had seen. It made me think of Serena, the Moonacre rabbit who had been my pet for a while, and I told him a little bit about her, neglecting to inform him of the way in which I had come across her trapped in the wood.
He seemed pleased with this effort at conversation on my behalf, and asked if I would accompany him around the garden once more if my head felt better. It did feel better and I needed occupation so I agreed.
We had a pleasant walk. Adam was a thoughtful companion and found regular places to stop so that I could rest. He talked quietly and seriously on a number of issues from literature to music. He confided in me that he had a real desire to travel to Europe and he described the places that he wanted to see. I found his conversation interesting, Robin and I rarely talked about anything serious, and he was clearly far more knowledgeable about the world than I. He asked me if I had thought about travelling abroad and I had to admit that although the thought had never occurred to me before, it suddenly sounded rather appealing.
We were sitting in the shade of a large Horse Chestnut tree when Robin and Lucy found us. She was all pink-cheeked beauty and glittering eyes and I found myself shrinking in her presence. I couldn't even raise my eyes to look at Robin. Adam started to tell them how he had been trying to tempt me to travel and I heard Lucy laugh. I wanted to get away. But how could I do that without betraying myself? Lucy noticed my distress and wondered if my headache had returned. I looked gratefully at her because she had supplied me with a means of escape back to the house.
"It is better, thank you, but I find myself in need of a cooling drink" I told her. Adam immediately moved to take my arm, but Lucy linked her arm through mine and led me back to the house. Adam and Robin followed behind.
The weather changed as their visit continued and we were confined more and more to the house. This would have been unbearable if Robin had been there all of the time, but he was needed at the castle and so it was often just the three of us.
For much of the time, we amused ourselves singing at the piano or acting out little plays and reviews. I think Miss Heliotrope was happy to see me returning to some of my former pursuits and she was overjoyed when Lucy and I recited a selection of works from Hugo's 'Odes et Ballades'. She always had a weakness for French poetry.
The weather never improved sufficiently for us to take our trip to the beach and I was sorry for this because I hadn't yet been to see the sea again and I was looking forward to walking along the sands. When I said this to Lucy she too expressed regret as she had never seen the sea before either. Adam overheard us talking and pointed out that we would be able to go soon when they came next to visit. I looked at him in surprise; it hadn't occurred to me that they would come again in the immediate future. I was filled with fear as I contemplated the idea that he knew something about Lucy's relationship with Robin that was not general knowledge yet.
