For the past few days Daryl and I have been hunting squirrels every day when we go looking for Sophia. That's all we eat.

Squirrel and vegetables, squirrel soup, smoked squirrel, squirrel BBQ, and my favourite, when I'm out with Daryl we eat raw squirrel. Yum, protein!

"Good morning." Lori comes out of her tent. She's rubbing her eyes. She's never late. Something must've happened to her. She notices how late she woke up and says "I can't believe I slept in."

I am finishing eating a fruit I got for breakfast next to Carol, who is washing and hanging clothes.

Carol says "You must have needed it."

"Feeling all right?" I am staring at Lori. She looks tired and worried for some reason. She looks sick...

"Yeah. Next time wake me, all right? Especially on laundry day."

"Will do."

"No." Carol says "I can manage. Hey, have you seen the huge kitchen they got in there?" Lori frowns a little.

"Yes. Why"

"I wouldn't mind cooking in a real kitchen again. Maybe we all pitch in and cook dinner for Hershel and his family tonight." Cooking? I don't know nothing about cooking. Sounds fun though. "Kind of looking for things to keep my mind occupied."

Lori looks at Carol. She seems to be thinking about it "After everything they've done for us, seems like the least we could do. Mac, You mind extending the invitation?"

"Sorry. Would just feel more right coming from you."

"How so?"

"You're Rick's wife."

"And?"

Carol smiles "she's right. It sort of makes you our unofficial first lady."

"Morning, ladies" Rick's voice catches our attention.

Lori says "Morning, baby"

"Good morning" Carol replies shyly

I just answer "morning..."

"Can I take this child for a bit?" He says putting his hand on my shoulder. "I need to see Daryl's searching plan today. She may be needed"

Lori replies "Sure. Just be careful, she's still a kid."

"It's hard to remember that..." Rick says "She'll be fine."

We stand and walk to where the others are.

"All right, everyone's getting new search grids today.

If she made it as far as the farmhouse Daryl found, she might have gone further east than we've been so far."

Hershel's son, or so I think. Comes running. He looks nervous. "I'd like to help I know the area pretty well and stuff."

"Hershel's okay with this?"

"yeah. He said I should ask you."

"All right then."

Shane arrives after him. Grumpy as always.

Seriously... Something must have happened to him.. He wasn't like that

"Nothing about what Daryl found screams Sophia to me. Anyone could have been holed up in that farmhouse.

Daryl says "Whoever slept in that cupboard was no bigger than yay-high. It's a good lead."

I say "Maybe we'll pick up her trail again."

"No."Daryl says "maybe I'll pick up her trail again. I'm gonna borrow a horse, head up to this ridge right here, take a bird's-eye view of the whole grid."

Rick nods. "Good idea" hell no!

"No it's not! You're not going alone"

"You'll stay with Rick today. He'll tell you what to do. I'm going by myself. If she's up there I'll spot her." I sigh.

T-dog says "are you sure you don't want to take Mac with you? Maybe you'll see your chupacabra up there too."

"Chupacabra?" Rick asks confused. Oh not this again.

"You never heard this? Our first night in camp, Daryl tells us that the whole thing reminds him of a time when he went squirrel hunting and he saw a chupacabra." Says Shane. Hershel's kid laughs causing my brother to look at him angrily.

"What are you braying at, jackass?"

"You believe in a blood-sucking dog?"

"Do you believe dead people walking around?" That was a good one

The guy just stops laughing. He reaches for a rifle but Rick stops him.

"Ever fire one before?"

"Well, if I'm going out, I want one."

"Yeah," Daryl replies. "and people in hell want slurpees." Oh dear God! Sarcasm! You're making progress, brother.

"Why don't you come train tomorrow?" Shane says

Rick tells him "For now he can come with us."

"He's yours to babysit then. Tell me when your babysitting turn ends so we can really get our job done." Shane fires back referring to me having to stay with Rick.

Not cool, Shane. Not cool... I don't need no babysitter.


Taking care of the chicken. That's what rick told me to do until he's back.

Not all of them though. Just a specific one. His name is Bob, and he's not old enough to be called rooster. He even looks like a hen. A really fat hen.

I am sitting on the floor with the animal walking around me..

This is the most boring thing I've done in my entire life...

Bob stops what he's doing and looks directly at me.

It's actually creepy. I look at him moving back slightly.

He walks and stands over my legs.

Bob gets closer to my face. He looks like he wants me to do something.

We stare at each other.

This is great! My brother, Rick, T-Dog, Andrea and Shane are out there risking their lives while I'm having a moment with a chicken.

An awkward moment with a chicken...

If you thought taking care of a chicken was awkward, wait til the chicken stares at you like waiting for something.

Maybe he wants me to pet him.

I reach for his little head to pet him gently.

Bob bites me. He runs away when I scream.

I curse loudly and run for him.

Come here you little piece of...

I try to catch Bob.

I run, jump even try to tackle the chicken around the farm. It's no use.

Bob moves his wings as if he was trying to fly. Chickens don't fly, idiot! Don't even try!

I try to tackle it again while trying to not let my weight fall on him completely.

I got the chicken!

I take him carefully from his little chicken armpits and lift him until he's facing me with those black eyes that are just too big for his head.

He seems fine. I'm glad I didn't hurt him.

"You're one ugly rooster..." I say.

I put him back on the floor and he runs to where the other chickens are. Someone's feeding them. He'll be fine.

A sudden pain strikes my left side.

It feels like something stabbing me.

I hold myself tightly and try to breathe to calm myself down.

Woah...really should try to stop running.

The pain fades slowly so I stand normally again.

I walk back to camp. Maybe some water will help me.

"You're pregnant." I hear Glenn saying

What? Who? Really? I hide behind a tent to listen. I should not be doing this. I hate nosy people, and look at me!

"You can't tell anybody, okay?" Lori? She's pregnant?!

"You haven't told him yet?"

"No."She answers. Told who? Rick or Shane?

I mean, I know Rick is her husband, but it not hard to guess that she did stuff with Shane since we all thought Rick was dead. They were actually dating. Or at least looked like it.

Does Rick know about this?...

I better ignore it... I didn't hear anything...

I see Rick walking to where he left me. I move to where he is, trying to ignore the slight pain that came back in my lower ribs.

He tells me to follow him. I do as he says

"Whats wrong?" I ask as soon as I notice his strange mood.

"I need to talk to Lori."

"You want me to..."

"I want you to stay right next to me. Where I can see you."

"Why?"

"I have my reasons." He says. "Plus, I don't want to be responsible of loosing another Dixon.".

Oookaaaayyyyy... What happened out there?

We walk to where Lori is. Will she tell him?

"Something wrong?" She asks as we walk next to a fence where we can see the whole farm.

"I just had a long talk with Shane. He wants to call off the search."

Is he crazy? Sophia can't just be alone out there forever. Anyway, this is not my call. I'm actually standing a bit far to give them some privacy. I don't know why Rick wants to have me with him. Must be important.

"What do you think? What if it was Carl? Would you want us to keep looking?"

Lori looks at me, then she answers "If it was Carl, yes I'd want to know one way or another." Rick nods.

"Shane says my good intentions are making us weaker, that I can't make the hard decisions for the good of the group."

"They're all hard decisions."

"But maybe I'm holding on to a way of thinking that doesn't make sense anymore. He says it's math, basic survival How much fuel, how much food, how much ammo. Not much room in that equation for being soft. It's pretty simple when you start thinking of life like that."

"Hey!" Lori stops him "None of us were prepared to be living life this way.

You are making the best decisions you can with the information you have.

I don't see soft in that."

I see Maggie approaching. I clear my throat loudly so they turn and look at her coming too.

"My dad wants to talk to you." She says one shes here.


Apparently Hershel is mad at us.

Looks like the blonde kid lied. He did not have permission to go out today, or taking a gun.

Also it looks like he lied when he said Daryl could take a horse.

Rick apologizes for it and says he'll talk to him.

They have a new rule. Hershel takes care of his people, Rick takes care of us.

Good idea.

When they're done talking Rick takes me with him to check the fences around the farmhouse, this time with Hershel's permission.

The pain comes back a few times while we're at it but I simply ignore it. It comes and goes.

"You alright?" Rick asks.

"Yeah. I'm a little worried. I wonder how my brother's doing."

"I'm not talking about that. You seem uncomfortable. You in pain or something?"

Am I that obvious? I hope its gone when Daryl returns. " I'm just...trying to catch my breath. That's it"

"we've been just walking."

"I know." Should I tell him? Maybe he thinks I'm weak...

"What's wrong?"

I sigh. I'll tell him.

"don't tell my brother."

He nods "go ahead"

I tell him about the pain and the strange feeling. I feel something's wrong.

He assures me everything will be fine and says he wont tell Daryl about the stabbing feeling on my side as long as I'm sure its nothing serious.

I like Rick. I can trust him more than I could ever trust my father.

Everything seems fine except for the anxiety I've been feeling. I'm worried about Daryl. He should be back by now.


We finish checking the fences and head back to camp when we hear Andrea shouting "Walker!"

We run next to the RV to see something moving. Its coming out of the woods.

"Just one?" Rick asks

"I bet I can hit it from here."

"No" I say. "The noise would attract others"

"Put the gun down." Rick says

Shane runs to the walker. Rick calls him but he wont answer.

"We got it covered." He says.

The others run behind him, including Rick.

I stand there watching them. It's just one walker. I think there's no reason for me to follow them.

Then I see the crossbow.


Please.

Let him be alive.

Let him be safe.

Let him not be a walker.