When I wrote this chapter, honestly it gets really hot...XD
I wont be able to update sooner...-_-...sorry..,
but please enjoy and review kay?
Chapter Nine
Why?
Why?
Why?
Why do I feel so troubled?
It has been two weeks since he stopped talking to me...since he's shown me any emotion.
He never talks. He never smiles. He stopped nagging me. He stopped harassing me.
It's not that I like him harassing and nagging me, but he is so cold. It's his fault that this even happened, so why is he mad at me? If he hadn't done what he did that night, I might not have said those words to him. It's his fault and I shouldn't feel troubled since I'm the victim here.
...But it's still bothering me. For the first time in my life, I saw Usagi-san lose all the color in his face.
"S-sorry" I whispered out loud, as if he could hear me. The look of him in pain and in regret is the last thing I saw before he untied me and left the pent house.
I know he cried. I could see it in his face before he left the room. He looked so disheveled and he had an almost inaudible ragged breath.
I leaned my head on my desk. Kamijou-sensei is late so everyone in the class is making a fuss. My mind is full of thoughts so I don't mind if Kamijou-sensei will never show up.
"Mi-sa-ki-kun"
I jumped up in my seat when Sumi-sempai hugged me from behind. He buried his face to my neck.
"Sempai!" I scolded him.
He sits beside me leaning his chin at the palm of his hands he looks at me intently. "You haven't been looking good for the past few days. Are you okay?" he asks me.
Come to think of it. Usagi-san starts acting strange when I leave him with Sumi-sempai. Were they fighting when I wasn't around? Usagi-san hasn't liked Sumi-sempai from the start and sempai always insulting Usagi-san's work so…it's not impossible if they were.
"This is nothing. I just can't get the mathematics right" I sighed. I don't want to lie but I can't tell Sumi-sempai my worries.
"Uhh... Misaki, you do know this is Literature class?" Sumi said with a disapproving voice.
I shook my head and started laugh that damn laugh I do, every time I lie, or get nervous. " I know.. I uhm... didn't so my math homework last night, because I was having trouble with it."
"Misaki... we didn't have math homework last night...This is about Usagi-san, right?"
"Huh?"
"Nothing" He said in a distant voice. He then grabbed my book and flipped the pages. "Here, let me teach you some techniques to solve this problem easily."
"eh? uhm... t-thanks" Sumi-sempai is nice. He always waits for me when I'm not finished with something, he even walks me home and helps me at school.
I feel sorry for him because the truth is I already know the techniques he's teaching me. Usagi-san tutored me even if he treats me coldly. It's awkward and hard to concentrate, but it's because of Usagi-san's skillful way of teaching that I manage to learn.
I glance at Sumi-sempai. He is very good at teaching but…
Why do I feel empty?
"Sempai" I say quietly.
"Hmmm?" He hummed in a confused tone.
"Why do I feel like this?" CRAP DID I REALLY SAY THAT?
"Ha?"
"Oh, uh Haha...Forget it"
Sumi-sempai's confused face is funny and rare but I can't find myself to laugh. I don't like this, I spent too much time thinking about nothing but Usagi-san.
And this is all because of him…
Sumi-sempai hasn't talk to me the rest of the time. I tried my best not to space out in class. It feels like a long day to me before the class has finally over. I'm glad that I answered the entire question easily.
I tidied my desk. I hate being ordered by Usagi-san to come home early but I don't have a choice since niichan seconded his orders. Usagi-san hasn't even dropped me off or picked me up from school either, since that day too.
GYA! This is too frustrating.
I put my books into my backpack and was getting ready to go but then...
"TAKAHASHI-KUN!" the voice of the demon roars, giving every one in the class chills.
I feel my whole body tremble as he glares at me... It was that kind of glare telling me that this might be my last day alive. "Come to my office. NOW" I gulp. He waits at the door with a furious expresssion. I feel my body stiffen as I walk towards him.
Why do I have to suffer like this? Is my life just cursed to be this way?
"Kamijou the devil will definitely devour him." I hear some of the students in the room whisper. I hear Sumi-sempai call my name, before sensei suddenly grabbed my shirt and tugged me out of the room.
My face was flushed, not in embarrassment, but in frustration. Now, I was standing in front of the building of Usagi-sans pent house and I don't know what to do. I don't feel like going inside knowing that Usagi-san is there.
"If you don't love him then leave him! Tell him that's why you can't love him. You hate him right? You loathe him, then don't stick your ass on him anymore…"
I shook my head trying to get rid of the recent conversation I had with the Demon Kamijou. I can't really call it conversation since only Kamijou The Devil talked the whole 3 mins of it. The whole time I couldn't even utter a single word. His superior, Miyagi-sensei, drove me home so I didn't need to walk home. I unconsciously lifted my hands to reach my chest. I bit my lip.
It still aches.
I can't leave Usagi-san. I'm sure of it. I can't. I only said those words to him because it hurts so much… to be a replacement for niichan..., to be kissed by him, because he can't kiss niichan. It's so damn frustrating!
"I hate it! He only did that to me because of dumb niichan. He's just a user!" I yelled at the building but...
My body feels so heavy... I look down at the ground and a thought ran through my mind saying,"Are you sure about that, Misaki? What if he really loves you?"
"Why?" I whisper to myself.
Silence answers me...
This doesn't feel right. I feel like I'm missing something... I feel troubled. What is it?
A thought hit me like an arrow falling from the sky. If Usagi-san used me, he could have used someone else to replace niichan before he met me, but he didn't right?
I feel like I'm defending him from my own accusations. But the thought of me defending him makes no sense... shit! my heart is beating so loud.
Why?
"...He loved you more than he loved Takahiro and a person who has never felt that kind of love before will never understand that."
Kamijou The Devil words echoed in my head.
Love him?
I can't love him like this right? It's impossible. I already thought of it before... I don't know when and why but I'm a man and I wasn't born a homo so it's clearly impossible... and.. and I cant break the ties of the long and strong love he had for niichan.
But what if this is really love… what should I do? I've never loved anyone before...
I'm scared.
How do you know that you love someone?
...if you can't live without him.
…if you can't stand seeing him with other guy
…if it hurts to saw him in pain and be blissful for just a small thing he did…
...and Especially if your heart jumps whenever you look and hear his voice..
"Misaki?" Usagi-san's voice calls from behind me.
My heart skipped a beat. The crisp cold air stung my face, and I didn't even feel my warm tears cover my face. I lift my head and turn around to face him, not worrying how confused and flushed I may look.
I gulped, as I saw him wearing his long coat with both hands in his pockets. He looks so sad… the same sad eyes when he would look at niichan long ago.
The sad yet powerful eyes that hold emotion so powerful stare into my eyes. The mirror of unrequited love. Why didn't I notice it before? His eyes look at me like I'm something he loves but he knows it will never love him back. .
"Usagi-san… sorry" please don't be sad, I wanted to yell that to him, but I cant find my voice after saying sorry...
Without a second thought Usagi-san flew forward, and hugged me tightly, like he might lose me if he didn't. I hope I could become more honest and open to him. I hugged him back, smelling him and feeling his hands on my back. I love the way he held me. I don't feel any trace of disgust whenever he touch me.
There's no doubt. This person holds a very dangerous place in my heart.
I'm lying in the couch. I feel dazed and I can't seem to stop Usagi-san right now, his hand beside my head supporting his weight so he wont crush me with his body. I felt his hand rub my hips to my stomach. Our breathe mingled as he kiss me passionately. Sliding his tongue inside my mouth, I feel the warm and tender wet tongue that explores my mouth. His kiss is very dominating, and now sliding down to my jaw, nipping and tasting me. I moan, I feel hot all over and I cant think of anything other than his touch.
I hear my zipper opens and I immediately snapped out. " Usagi-san, Niichan might come."
He stopped kissing me for a moment and looked at me with a gentle face, "He wont"
I reached up to touch his silver hair glow dully, because of the yellow light of the sunset. It's so alluring. I cant believe a handsome guy like him loves a person like me.
"Misaki, I'm sorry"
No.
I'm the one who made you suffer so, Why are you apologizing?
"Usagi-san don-"
"I love you" he leaned closer, leaning his forehead against mine. I could feel his warm breath tingling my face. " I love you"
Usagi-san invades my lips again but this time he its more passionate, more gentler. His hands roam more, going up till he reaches my nipple.
"hmmm..." I moan as he rub it with his thumb. His kiss continues to go down to my neck. I feel that my breath stop when he found his lips in my nipple. He licked and sucked it.
I grabbed a handful of his hair and moan louder when he bit it gently. The touch of his teeth on my nipple is so good. I arch my back as a sign that I wanted more, and Usagi-san seemed to understand, as he suck it harder, "aahh" I moaned involuntarily.
I was so busy feeling the sensation and I cant remember when he pulls my pants down. "stop it Usagi-san" I tried to push him away but my strength was failing me especially when he started to stroke my hard organ.
"Ah!"
My sense of right and wrong was leaving me when his hand hungrily pumped my member. His cold hands are burning my skin.
His mouth leaves my violated nipples, and I shivered in pleasure when He ran his tongue up from my neck to the back of my ear and bites my earlobe.
"Usagi-saaah..." I moan when he ran his thumb at the tip of my swollen member. "aah! nmnmnm..."
He kiss me in my lips, in my jaw, going down to my chest to my stomach and "Ah! aaah! Usagi-saahhnnmmmm..."
I bucked my hips as his hands spread my thighs. His mouth engulf my whole member. My grip on his hair tightened as he sucked it hard.
But all of these sensations turned into fear when his fingers found their way in my...
He put it in! "Usagi-san...please lets stop this here" I beg. Tears start to fall when he put another one of his fingers in. I cant do this "It hurts"
"Misaki... I don't want to hurt you"
"Your doing it now IDIOT" I retort.
"Don't worry it will go away" His voice gives me slight reassurance but when he moves his finger farther I feel like I'm being torn.
"Usagi-san"
"sshh... Just relax Misaki"
I tried to relax when he stopped moving his finger. He kissed my lips again as if he was apologizing before he started moving it again when he noticed I was more relaxed. He pushed his finger farther and I gasp when he pull it out.
Hmmmm... Pulling it out doesn't seem to hurt.
Usagi then started pushing his fingers in again, and by reflex I I tense, but then I relax When I realize it doesn't hurt anymore. Usagi-san moves his fingers around, widening the space and it hurt again. I feel my face contorts in pain. I placed my arms around his neck, not knowing how much longer this pain will last. After a second I feel more fingers enter. and I slightly jump in protest when he push i in and out. I feel the pain again.
"Wrap your legs around me Misaki" Usagi-san says. .
I wrap my legs around his waist. He pumped my erection again while moving his fingers around. I don't know If I cried out because of the pain or the pleasure he's causing me, but I moan more when he squeezed my member.
"I- com-hmmm" I moan.
Usagi-san pull out his fingers and open his zipper and tugging the material of his pants down, I blush when I saw him pulling out his throbbing manhood. and Its soo damn HUGE. I close my eyes.
Its entering. I feel it. I gulp for air as Usagi-san penetrates deeply inside me. It doesn't hurt instead it feels great. Its hot.
"Misaki" he calls
"hm?" I answers lazily.
"open your eyes"
"No" I refused.
"Open your eyes"
"No" Doing this with him is so embarrassing.
"I want you to remember this moment, Misaki, because this moment is... moment that I mark you as mine" Usagi-san's voice is so alluring and husky.
I gently peeled my eyes open and saw Usagi-san's face, he looked so serious, his eyes were burning with passion and certainty. I felt like my heart stopped beating at this moment.
"This strong love that dwells inside me that even Takahiro cant break will be your shadow that where ever you are, you always belong to me"
Without waiting a reply he thrust in.
"ahh!"
I feel my body shudder in pleasures.
"Misaki"
He pull out his own erection almost all the way and push it back in.
"anhh" I moan loudly. My mouth was open in ecstasy, there were no words to explain the feeling of pleasure coursing through my body. Usagi-san thrust in and out almost wildly.
The wet sound of our body's friction filled the living room. Usagi-san held my legs and pulled out almost all the way, before pushing his cock back in. I screamed in pleasure at the feeling.
Usagi-san kissed me passionately and moving by instinct my arms tightened around his neck.
Thrusting harder deeper until he reach my sweet spot.
"aahhh" I left a long load moan as I reach my climax. I cummed, and the white liquide coated both of our chests. Usagi-san then thrust harder and faster, wanting to reach his climax. I felt Usagi-san cum, his hot seed inside is warm, and it felt good.
We both collapse on the couch. Panting and breathing hard. Usagi-san hands cupped my face. I look at him...
...this erratic heart beating. who's heart is it?
"Misaki, I love you so much"
I dont know whose heart is it but its like a warm melody in my ears. Usagi-san face is the last thing I saw before the drowsiness finally makes me asleep.
I hope that melody will continue to sing to me... and only me.
InnocentUke97: you might get tired of me thanking you...^_^...sorry... but THANK YOU a billions times
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