Good morning! It's very nearly one in the morning, so I apologize in advance if this chapter is more strange than the previous ones. Of course, this one is supposed to be strange... I mean, I kind of planned that. I do know what I'm doing...

Or do I?... Well, I hope you enjoy it! Bon appetite! ...that means I'm hoping you eat this up and don't spit it out because it's totally weird...

NEVER MIND. Just read...

Chapter nine: Never Again

When Lukas awoke, he was in his own bed. He sat up quickly.

"What on earth just happened?" He questioned no one in particular. Then he silently berated himself for talking to himself constantly. I do that far too often, he thought. One of these days someone is going to catch me.

"Catch you doing what, Lukas?" He leapt to his feet, surprised by the womanly voice coming from the doorway. He tried not to glare at Lady Ann, who was smiling smugly. "Did you have a good rest, son?"

"No. I mean yes," he said, annoyed. What was she doing lurking in his doorway like that? How disturbing. And completely not normal, Lukas thought. "I'm fine. Just... Is Tori alright?" Ann nodded.

"Yeah, she's fine. Why do you ask?" She seemed innocent enough. But Lukas simply wasn't sure. She knows something, he thought. That thought frightened him.

"Well, you see... I- I- I- I mean, she... Yesterday we..." Lukas couldn't speak clearly with her staring at him like that. It was almost as bad as Bianca's icy glare.

"Oh, you mean you fought," she said, her countenance darkening. "No, she isn't over that quite yet. I suggest you leave her alone. THEN she'll be fine." Lukas couldn't believe what he was hearing.

"What!?" He stuttered, "No, you don't understand! I was trying to apologize and she-" Suddenly, looking over Lady Ann's shoulder, Lukas saw a familiar little white bespectacled wooly sneaking out the front door... "I mean, I'm not going to just sit by and let her fester in bitterness over a silly argument. I'm going to apologize. Good day, madam." And he shoved his way past his landlady and followed little wooly Tori out into the sunshine.

But she was nowhere to be found. He looked around, confused. Surely she couldn't have gone far... That's when he noticed that the door to the general store was swinging wide open on it's hinges. He smiled and strode over to the door and knocked once on the door frame.

"Hello? Tori, I know you're in here. Come out, come out, where ever you- AUGH!" He screamed in pain as an arrow suddenly pierced his good hand. He looked up when he heard cruel laughter... There she was, standing at the top of the stairs. Laughing at his pain.

"Ahahahaha! Lukas, how nice to see you again. How's your hand? Hahahahahahaha!" Lukas couldn't believe what was happening.

"R-Rosetta? You... You shot me!" He was incredulous. There she was, decked out in armor, a bow in her hand, a wicked gleam in her eyes... Rosetta, the woman he had once thought he loved. Oh, how wrong he had been!

"I did?" She slowly turned to look at her bow, and smiled at him when she again met his shocked gaze. "Why, yes. I suppose I did. How funny! Hahahaha!" She fitted another arrow to her bow. "Let's see if I don't miss again." Lukas' eyes nearly popped out of his head and he leapt out of the way just in time to escape the arrow, which whizzed past his left ear.

"ROSETTA! What are you trying to do!?" He cried out, confused and afraid for his life.

"What am I trying to do?" She said. "I'm trying to get you to leave me alone. Forever! You're always coming around, always talking to me, always spouting off your ridiculous poetry! Well, I don't want to hear it. I never did! And I told you that. But you didn't listen to me, nooo. Well, are you listening NOW!?" She let another arrow loose, and he ducked out of the way.

"I'm listening! I'm listening! I won't ever talk to you again! I won't even look at you. Never again! Just stop trying to kill me!" She cocked her head, and smiled even wider.

"Kill you? Now, there's an idea. Maybe you're not such a moron after all," she whispered darkly as she fitted another arrow to her bowstring. Lukas felt weak. He was so afraid. Another moment and he'd be gone, his life extinguished forever by cruel fate! He'd be murdered, killed by the hand of-

"ROSETTA!" The angry cry distracted the would be killer just in time to misdirect her arrow, which lodged itself in the wall just behind Lukas. Both he and Rosetta turned to see Mist standing in the doorway, dressed to the hilt in armor all too similar to Rosetta's. And she was brandishing a deadly looking club.

"It's time to settle our differences. Now!" Rosetta flared up in anger and began firing arrow after arrow at her rival, who deflected then one after another as she made her way closer to the sharp-tongued woman she had once called friend.

Lukas gaped at the sight before him- two normally perfectly friendly and sane women trying to kill each other. Well, now I've seen everything, he thought to himself.

"Lukas! What's going on?" The poet turned to see Raguna, of all people, standing there, looking wide-eyed at the spectacle before him.

"Oh, you know, the usual," he answered the bewildered farmer. "Angry women settling their differences by battling to the death. Fun stuff, right?" Raguna had no words. Lukas was actually pretty happy about that. He wasn't sure why. I mean, they actually ARE battling to the death. I shouldn't be happy about anything at this point, he thought.

After a few moments, the women realized that Raguna was there. Rosetta let loose a blood-chilling battle cry.

"HEEEEEYYYYAAAAAAHHHH! The prince will be MINE!" Prince? Lukas wondered what on earth she was talking about. Mist answered with a cry just as passionate and primitive.

"YYYEEEAAAAAARRRRGGGHHHH! You don't stand a chance, Rosetta! I SAW HIM FIRST!" Suddenly Lukas understood. It all makes sense now, he thought. They are fighting over the idiot amnesiac farmer boy. He's a far cry from a prince, that's for sure!

Raguna was too stupid to catch on. So he stood there watching in awe, only making matters much, much worse. They're really going to kill each other, Lukas thought. I don't know why I'm not really worried about that...

Then Mei walked in. And grabbed both men and shoved them aside.

"This is no place for you two!" She screamed. "Let a real warrior show you how it's done!" Raguna blushed and picked himself up off the floor... Then ran away screaming as soon as Mei started fighting. It wasn't hard to understand why.

Rosetta's arrows and Mist's club didn't stand a chance against the foreign warrior's blade. Mei was everywhere, slashing and stabbing the two women with ease. Blood was all over the place, and Lukas couldn't tear his eyes away. It was all so terrible, so surreal! Like it wasn't really happening. Like it was all some crazy, awful nightmare...

Never again, Lukas thought. Never again will I be able to come into this store and see it as a simple store. Now it is a battlefield on which unspeakable horrors happened... Lukas had no idea what would happen next.

Suddenly Mei shouted out in a strange language. He had no idea what she was saying, but as she spoke she sheathed her sword and held out both of her hands... Red flames burst from her finger tips and made contact with the faces of Rosetta and Mist, and Lukas was horrified. Their skin melted and charred, their mouths open in silent screams as they fell to the ground in agony. And she didn't stop. She scorched their entire bodies with her deadly fire, burning away their clothes and their flesh.

"BURN!" Mei laughed maniacally, "That's right, ladies. Burn! Hahahahahaha!" Lukas had had enough. He ran from the general store, ready to throw up. Lukas would never think of Mei the same way again.

Never. Again.

He was still running. He didn't care where. He just wanted to get away from that terrible place, from those awful women, and to find his darling Tori at last... And that's when he slammed into someone in his haste.

"OH! I'm so sorry, I- YOU!" He couldn't believe his bad luck: the woman he had had just slammed into was none other than Bianca De Sainte-Cocquille.

"Yes. It's me. Why don't you seem very happy about that, Lukas?" She asked, her blue eyes cold and angry. "Oh, I remember... You don't like me very much, do you? Now, why was that...? Ah, yes. It's because I offered you my purest love and devotion. But you didn't want it! You didn't want me, or anything to do with me." She was angrier than a chipsqueak whose winter supply of radishes has just been stolen away by a hungry buffamoo. Which meant that she was very, VERY angry.

I mean, I'd be upset if I were that chipsqueak... Just saying...

"Now, now, Bianca, let the past stay in the past," he said, trying to calm her down. But she wasn't finished with him yet. Not by a long shot.

"You were repulsed by me. Ah, yes, you had some aversion to me... You broke my heart." Her voice wavered then. Something in her seemed to snap at that moment. A wild look appeared in her eyes. Lukas was getting increasingly nervous. He was more nervous than a cockadoodle in a shadow panther's den... In other words, very VERY nervous.

I mean, I would be nervous...

"I still don't know why you did that," she sighed, then continued speaking, mad hope in her voice. "Maybe you were confused...? Yes. That's it. You were confused! You didn't know what you were saying! Did you, darling? Well, now you do... Here's your second chance. Lukas, tell me you love me. Tell me you'll have me, and all will be well! For I love you ever so much, my sweet Lukas, poet devine!" She flung herself at him, wrapping constricting arms around his poor neck.

"AH! Bianca! Bianca, NO! Oh, no... NO, no, no, no, NO!" He managed to escape her clutches and back away from her quickly, holding his hands out in front of himself for protection. "I am NOT going to do this again. I told you before that I do NOT love you. I was most definitely NOT confused. I will NOT have you, and I will most certainly never love you. And I am NOT your sweet Lukas, thank you, but no thank you!"

He finally stopped, taking a deep breath. He then realized that he had just lost his temper... And that he had yelled at Bianca. Who was obviously unstable at the moment.

Big mistake. Very big mistake, as he was soon to discover...

...In the NEXT CHAPTER! XD Stay tuned to find out how exactly the explosive Bianca De Sainte-Cocquille reacts to Lukas' outburst. It's going to be colossal... And I mean that quite literally...

Anyway, any sane person can tell that this chapter is kind of weird. I mean, Rosetta tried to kill Lukas. Rosetta and Mist tried to kill each other. Mei melted off Rosetta and Mist's faces- and since when did Mei know how to use magic!? Like, WHAT GIVES!?

Again, you'll just have to wait and seeeeee... *echoes*waitandseeee...seeee...seeee...

I hope you liked it, even if it was kind of trippy!

Review, please!