Disclaimer: Not mine, no infringement meant. Fanfiction for entertainment only; no profit made.

9. It's All Psychobabble To Me

Roxanne closed her eyes and inhaled slowly as she held the injured man for all she was worth. Beneath the room's medicinal smell and the gown's whiff of bleach was the sandalwood/cedar/citrus scent that had once meant 'Bernard', but now was 'Megamind'. Without his leather and studs his body seemed much more frail, and his thin frame trembled slightly beneath her encircling arms. Still, it felt so good to just hold on and feel him breathe. Until that moment she hadn't realized just how worried she'd really been.

A slight throat-clearing interrupted her thoughts, and she recognized Minion's voice. "Uh…Miss Ritchi? I think you're hurting him…"

Her eyes flew open and she leapt backwards as if burnt. Megamind's face really did have an expression of discomfort which was instantly masked, and she felt her face flare red from embarrassment. "Oh! I'm so sorry! I…I was just relieved to see you finally awake."

Megamind's lids drooped slightly as he smiled in a self-satisfied manner. "Oh, it's all right," he sighed contentedly, "You can hug me anytime." His eyes rose bashfully to meet hers once more, and his smile widened at the expression on her face.

Roxanne melted. If someone had suggested four days earlier that she would be so ecstatic to see her serial kidnapper wake up from a coma that she would spontaneously hug him, she would have provided the name of a good psychiatrist. 'Amazing how quickly feelings change,' she reflected, returning his gentle grin. Of course, the feelings had been there for some time, just directed towards his alter-ego of 'Bernard'.

"Sooo..." continued Minion, "Dr. Philber was just going to tell us how the Boss is progressing, so that he can hear it, too."

Miss Ritchi glanced over at the physician, only to see him smiling back at her. Looking around, she realized that everyone else had drifted off to attend to other duties, leaving just the three of them at Syx's bedside. The physician was obviously amused with her reaction, yet pleased as well. 'These people really do care about him, despite everything he's done over the years,' she realized. 'I wonder if he knows that?'

Aloud, she responded, "Of course! Sorry to interrupt."

"I'm not sorry," piped up the invalid, who received a 'just you wait' scowl from the already-mortified reporter.

Dr. Philber just stared at him for a moment with a raised eyebrow, then began. "First, most obviously, any cerebral edema incurred has clearly resolved, as has the swelling and ecchymoses on his face and orbit. The various fractures are knitting nicely, and the pleural air leak appears to have healed. I've just put the chest tube to water seal, and we'll repeat the portable chest x-ray in a few hours, then again in the morning. If the lung stays inflated, we'll get that tube out of his chest then. There is no evidence of internal bleeding, and he didn't end up needing the transfusion."

"That means he's getting better, right doc?" asked a worried Minion.

The doctor smiled. "Yes. That means he's getting better."

Megamind blinked at them, wide-eyed. "I really did it this time, didn't I?"

The physician nodded solemnly. "I won't lie to you; it was pretty bad. Right now, though, all you need to do is rest. Your body will take care of itself."

As if to punctuate the doctor's statement, Megamind found himself yawning hugely, suddenly barely able to keep his eyes open. His head drifted forward, only to jerk upright again as he struggled to stay awake.

"I think that's our cue," commented Roxie, smiling fondly at the blue alien that now resembled a petulant child determined to stay up past his bedtime.

"Don't go yet," he insisted, lids drooping closed, "I'll be awake…for hours…yet…zzzzzzz." His sentence trailed off into a gentle snoring as his chin finally settled on his chest.

The physician snorted, then leaned over to settle his charge into a more comfortable supine position. Megamind's breathing never faltered. Dr. Philber stared at him, then commented, "At this point I suspect he'll sleep through till morning."

Roxanne leaned over and kissed the azure forehead again; this time she found that she wasn't embarrassed at all. "I'll be back first thing tomorrow, then," she promised in a whisper, so as to not disturb him.

"It's still OK if I stay, isn't it?" Minion asked the doctor.

"Of course, Mr. Minion. Is there anything we can do to make you more comfortable?"

"No, I'm good…" he turned towards Roxanne, "if you could pick me up some food at some point? I'm running low."

"Sure, glad to," she answered, gathering up her purse from where she'd dropped it on the tiled floor. "Any particular brand you have in mind?"

"Well…I really like Omega One Fresh Flakes, but any basic flake fish food will do. The pellet kind sinks too fast and is harder to eat."

"No problem," she smiled, punching him in the shoulder playfully. "See you tomorrow!"

On her way home she stopped by the grocery to pick up some badly needed supplies such as milk and toilet paper, then swung through the pet food aisle to see if they carried Minion's requested brand. To the reporter's relief they did, so she tossed two cans into her basket. Next stop was the deli to grab something quick for dinner before checking out and heading to her apartment.

Once there she sighed with relief, kicked off her shoes, tossed her purse on the sofa, then made short work of putting away her groceries and whipping together something to pacify the monster growling in her stomach. Exiting the kitchen with a sandwich in one hand and a glass of milk in the other, she spied her purse sitting on the couch and remembered the sheaf of papers it contained.

"Time to check out that file," she muttered, sitting down and pulling out the copy of Dr. Pearson's report. Taking a huge bite of her ham and cheese sandwich, she leaned back onto the cushions and flipped open the cover.

"Report to the Metro City Prison for the Criminally Gifted Concerning 000-00-0006"

Roxanne snorted at the designation; since Syx had no social security number and wasn't an actual convict with a prison serial number, the doctor had numerically resorted to using his subject's name.

The first section summarized Megamind's life up to the age of 18, when this psychiatrist had evaluated him. "The patient is an 18 year old male, illegal alien who has resided in the facility since infancy…" it began. Roxanne read this section carefully, but discovered little that she didn't already know. The physician seemed less forgiving of Syx's negative interactions with the outside educational system than the Warden did, but otherwise it was essentially a factual recounting of the major events in his life to that point.

Section two dealt with "the presenting problem", which was more interesting, but also more subjective. "Despite reaching the legal age of majority, the patient refuses to leave the institution in which he was raised. He repeatedly states that he has a 'destiny' to be 'evil', and that he therefore should be incarcerated. He refers to himself as 'Megamind, incredibly handsome criminal genius and master of all villainy' and boasts in vague terms about the illegal activity he plans to perform in the future, after he has become a 'super-villain'. His self-esteem is directly linked to his perceived level of criminality, and is particularly influenced by the voiced opinion of others that he is 'bad'. This likely stems from the stated belief of the significant individuals in his home environment that being 'bad' was an admirable quality, coupled with the repeated negative reinforcement he was accorded as a child by the school system." So far, Roxanne found herself in complete agreement. Any child raised in a prison whose moral standards were shaped by the inmates would have a skewed sense of right and wrong. Add a prejudiced teacher who saw every failed attempt to be accepted by his peer group as having malevolent intent, and of course he considered himself inescapably 'bad'.

"The subject demonstrates a failure to conform to social norms with respect to lawful behaviors on a routine basis."

'No argument there', thought Roxanne. 'Just a complicated way of saying that he commits crime frequently.'

"He demonstrates deceitfulness as indicated by repeatedly lying, particularly to authority figures. He also enjoys using aliases in conning others, most notably in his previously mentioned adopted moniker of 'Megamind'."

'Or Bernard,' the reporter reflected uncomfortably. 'So far this guy is hitting the nail on the head.'

"He has a callous unconcern for the feelings of others and lacks the capacity for empathy, demonstrating a complete lack of remorse over his actions and how they affect other people."

Roxanne sat bolt upright. "Now wait just a second!", she exclaimed aloud. "That's not right at all!" A series of scenes flashed through her mind: sorrowful green eyes staring out of a rain-soaked mask of misery; his repentant expression as he gaped out her window onto the increasingly-devastated city; his heartfelt pleas for aid to the indifferent 'Music Man'; his risking his own life to save both her and the city…'Heck, the whole reason he's in a hospital bed right now is his remorse over having created Tighten!'

"Strike one, Dr. Pearson. You got that dead wrong," the brunette snorted.

The report continued, "006 also demonstrates marked impulsivity, failing to plan ahead before he acts."

"Have you ever even seen any of his plots to destroy Metro Man? They are detailed to the…" She stopped, realizing that she was arguing aloud with a man who had written a report years ago. For all she knew, he was long dead. She returned to reading.

"The subject also demonstrates a reckless disregard for safety of others." Again, Roxanne felt compelled to object, if only silently.

'He was always careful to keep me safe, no matter how dangerous the kidnapping seemed. In fact, I don't think he ever hurt anyone!'

The case report continued on for several pages, mostly supporting the first points with a plethora of examples, most of which seemed to have been taken out of context. It seemed to the reporter that the psychologist had made his diagnosis before even interviewing the patient, and was now manipulating the data to make it fit with his preconceived conclusions.

Her skepticism rose even further once she reached the third section, which discussed his presumed diagnoses. This portion of text was filled with terms such as "childhood conduct disorder", "antisocial personality", and "dissocial personality disorder". The justification for his diagnoses lay in the bullet-points in section two, all of which supported his theories.

'Surprise, surprise,' thought Roxanne.

The last section was on his treatment recommendations. "Due to the high degree of reactance in this individual, reverse psychology should be utilized as a primary method of molding behavior. For instance, as the desired result is for the patient to become a fully-functioning member of society, it should be stressed that he is too dangerous to interact with the public, through both verbal and physical cues. An example of a physical cue would be increasing the apparent security of his cell. The verbal reinforcement of his 'villainy' additionally increases his self-esteem, making him more likely to become a successful, well-adjusted citizen in the outside world."

"What a load of….!" The brunette couldn't help blurting out. "Seriously - 'reverse psychology'? That sounds like something my mother would suggest! What about cognitive behavioral therapy? How about old-fashioned psychoanalysis?" Her eyes narrowed suspiciously. "What kind of 'renowned psychiatrist' makes the recommendation to repeatedly tell an 18-year-old boy who grew up in prison that he is a villain and can't be trusted outside with normal people?"

The reporter sat for a few minutes staring at the closed report cover, then, coming to a decision, retrieved a pen and legal tablet from her desk. Returning to the couch, she opened the file once more, this time taking notes. When she finally finished her second perusal, she was a lot more concerned about the conclusions drawn. There was very little of the Megamind she knew in this report, and even less of her 'Bernard'. She chewed on the end of her pen thoughtfully as she reviewed her written observations.

After a few minutes she placed her notes and the report on the coffee table, she stood and stretched her knotted back muscles which protested the long period of immobility. "All right. Tomorrow, after I visit Megamind, I need to do a little background check on Dr. Pearson."

-MM-MM-MM-

"Good morning, Minion. How did he sleep?" Roxanne had awakened early and headed straight for the prison.

The robot/ape stood and turned towards her. "Well, good morning Miss Ritchi!" he responded in a quiet tone. Gesturing towards the cot and its still-sleeping occupant, he continued, "As you can see, he slept pretty well. Never once woke up, even when they came and took the chest x-ray."

The reporter studied the still form. Megamind lay quietly on his back in the same position she'd left him, snoring softly. The angry violaceous bruising over the right side of his face had begun to change to a sickly yellowish green, and the swelling was almost completely gone. The oxygen tubing was still in his nose, but his breathing seemed better than the first day. The tube still protruded from a dressing on his left chest, but the pleur-evac was quiet; she didn't know if that was good or bad. His right hand was still in a splint, but his fingers were much less swollen. All-in-all, he looked like he was recovering rapidly.

"Do you know if they're going to get rid of that tube from his chest?" she asked Minion.

The fish nodded enthusiastically. "Dr. Philber was already here, and said that the chest x-ray was good. Apparently the boss has to be awake, though, for them to safely remove it. The nurse is going to call him when he wakes up."

"Any idea when that might be?"

"Nah. It could be in five minutes or five hours. You never know."

Roxanne sighed, smiling fondly down at her sleeping hero. "Well, tell him I was here. I have to go to work now, but I'll be back tonight."

"Yes, ma'am! I'll be sure to do that."

With one last glance back as the guard opened the door, she waved goodbye and was off to the station.

TBC…